Thank you for all the lovely comments! Some of you have left lengthy and really kind comments and I'll reply back to you personally soon! (I'm on vacation so its kinda hard).

Chapter 9

Emma clutched the handle of the door until her knuckles were white. Should she turn around and let him speak, or do what she usually does: run. She didn't want to talk. She didn't want to know whether Killian thought about her the same way she did? Did he have her in his mind, replaying his touch on her skin and his lips on her neck?

Did it even mean anything to him?

She turned around slowly and matched her gaze to his. He was biting his lip and his blue eyes seemed uncertain with a slight frown marring his forehead.

"Swan" Killian said, unsure of what to say. To ask her whether she regretted it or enjoyed it? His right hand went to his tattoo of Milah, caressing the skin beside the tattoo and he could feel Emma's eyes following his hand.

"Is she…" Emma started, clearing her throat, "Where's Milah?"

Emma didn't need to know who Milah was or is. She understood the look in his eye, the same look she shared of having your heart crushed into a million pieces by love. She had figured out the day Killian had asked her if she had ever been in love, that he has. He definitely has, and judging by his tattoo, it didn't end well. It never does a tiny voice in Emma's head spoke.

"Milah was the woman I loved" Killian spoke, his thumb brushing over the name on his tattoo; should he tell her? He hadn't ever told any of the other women he shared a nightcap with. But Emma was different; she would understand judging by the heartbreak evident in her eyes, "She was murdered three years ago"

"Oh" was all Emma could say. He had loved and lost. Suddenly his reclusiveness to his boat with rum and women made sense; he was grieving and he was lonely. After him, Emma had gone through a dark time for a couple of months before she met David who had come in her life as an angel and forced her into law school.

"I'm so sorry" Emma sympathized, watching Killian take a few deep breaths.

"Thank you" he said and after a few seconds he looked straight at her neck and without missing a beat asked her, "Did I leave a mark?"

Emma was taken aback by the bluntness of his question. She had expected some awkwardness; both fidgeting and hoping the other speaks but seems like Killian cut to the point.

She touched the make-up hidden hickey on her neck and nodded, watching Killian smile to himself.

"Good" he whispered and looked up at her, a slight smile on his face. His expression was nothing like what she had first experienced once she had spilled her coffee on him which was downright seductive and cocky. Now, he was smiling softly at her - a genuine smile - and his eyes were glinting with something. Something Emma had nothing of – hope.

And it was in that moment with Killian sporting such a tender look with a glint of hope in his eyes and trusting her enough to tell her about Milah, that Emma made her decision.

"It didn't mean anything Killian" Emma lied, "It is no secret that you are very attractive and that we have some…sexual attraction, but that's all it is. That night… we gave in into this attraction, though we shouldn't have. You're my boss Mr. Jones and that's the way it should be"

Killian's face dropped, his smile disappeared and his eyes were once again left the way they were – lost and sad. It seems he over analyzed everything. Emma didn't feel the same way as he did. She didn't think about him all the bloody time this weekend. For her it was just a simple hook-up, not anything more. She didn't feel a connection between them since the moment they met, exchanging a little glimpse of heartbreak in both of their lives. She didn't care about whether Killian had lost his love, and was left completely and utterly broken since. It was just sexual attraction.

Emma watched the inner struggle within Killian on his face. Her question was answered by his expressions – he had thought about her, and that night definitely meant more to him than just two people giving in to their attraction slightly. But it was exactly due to this reason she couldn't let him speak.

He told her about Milah and she told him about being in love once. The next thing you know, she 's telling him all about her past life and what happened in Boston, and he flees - abandoning her just like everyone in her life had. Emma had to guard her heart, she had to heighten and strengthen her walls. She had look out for herself so she could never get hurt.

"Right" Killian finally spoke, "Seems I have misunderstood this thing between us but I understand now"

It saddened Emma to see Killian so hurt. He didn't even try to hide it, his hand back to caressing his tattoo and his eyes looking at his shoes. Had one night really changed this much between them?

Emma was saved by an awkward depart from the room as there was knocking on the door and Elsa's head peeked inside, "Am I interrupting something?"

"No" Killian stated firmly, his hands by his side and his eyes the way she had never seen before - deadpan serious.

"Alright" Elsa smiled and walked towards Killian and placed her palms on his shoulders, "We have to go shopping for jewelry. We need wedding bands, and Liam and I decided that we're going to give the male guests cufflinks and females a nice little pendant as a thank you gift. What do you think?"

"It sounds brilliant" Killian responded, trying to smile but failing.

Emma's eyebrows shot up. Cufflinks and pendants as thank you gifts for the guests? Rich people.

"What do you think Emma?" Elsa asked, turning towards the other blonde.

"I have never really been into weddings or such so I really have no idea how these things work" Emma shrugged, offering a sorry smile.

Elsa noticed the tension inside the room, with Emma's tense posture and worried eyes and Killian's inability to smile and sad eyes, and blurted out, "Emma you should come with us!"

Both Emma and Killian's eyes snapped at the blonde between them. "Sorry?" Emma asked, unsure if she heard the right thing. All this wedding shopping thing is family business, why would they want her there?

"Well, it's just me alone with Liam and Killian. Belle is in god knows where, Thailand or Nepal right now?" she raised a questioning eyebrow at Killian who answered "Nepal". "Anyways, Emma I would like for you to come since I need another woman's voice in there along with these two handsome boys. David has spoken highly of you, so would you please help me?"

"I have work to d-"

"Oh please! I know about the office affairs, and there isn't any immediate work concern. Nothing that your colleagues and juniors can't handle. Please Emma, come with us?"

Emma looked at the woman in front of her with her eyebrows raised in hope and bright smile on her face. It was almost like saying no to a cute little baby and everyone knows that's an impossible task.

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Emma found herself sitting in the backseat of a black car. It wasn't a BMW or Mercedes but Emma could tell it was expensive judging by the glossy look and leather seats inside.

The first few minutes inside the conference room were awkward as Liam and Elsa were deciding between two jewelry stores as Killian stood silently beside Liam lost in his thoughts, and Emma sitting beside Elsa, watching Killian.

Once Liam had agreed to Elsa's decision muttering a "your wish is my command" followed with a peck, they all had headed to the parking lot where Liam chose to drive himself and Elsa sat beside him on the passenger seat. Emma looked at Killian who opened the door for her, his eyes directed at the car's door as Emma sat inside. He shut the door and scooted in from the other side, making sure to stay at the other side without having an inch of him touching the woman beside him.

Emma had chatted with Elsa as Liam sometimes chimed in but even Emma could feel Liam's eyes looking at his brother's face from the rear view mirror.

Once inside the jewelry store, Emma was sitting on a very plush sofa sipping the delicious coffee she had been offered as Killian was sitting on the sofa opposite her, busy on his phone as Liam and Elsa were choosing their wedding bands.

"Guys" Elsa called out and motioned them to come to her.

"Alright so now we would like to see cufflinks" Liam told the salesperson who smiled and presented an entire box full of cufflinks. Elsa went through them and asked Emma to sit beside her on the love seat, and the two women finally decided two different ones. Liam made the decision for them by choosing a platinum cufflink with a little black square on them.

The pendants were easier to choose; Elsa and Emma weeding out the ugly ones and finally choosing one with three different little balls attached together.

"That's a beautiful necklace Emma!" Elsa commented, eyeing the necklace Emma always wore.

"Oh. Thanks. It's a keychain actually" Emma replied uncomfortably.

"Wait…it's a Swan!" Elsa smiled brightly, nudging Liam to look at it. Emma offered them both a small smile, grateful they didn't ask any further questions as a man with a dimpled smile and crinkling eyes and a fake pregnant Emma stealing from a convenience store came into her mind.

Emma excused herself and wandered in the jewelry store. She reached the rings section and glanced at them. She hadn't been much of a jewelry type of person, only wearing the swan keychain since the moment it was bought, stolen for her.

But she liked jewelry. All the different designs and metals and shapes. Being in foster care and later a runaway thief, Emma never had the luxury to even consider any sort of jewelry. That's why she was so touched when he had gifted her this necklace, the sentiment with which Emma wore it then very different for why she was still wearing it today, years later. The sentiment suddenly becoming very valid just this morning.

She was looking through many beautiful rings, all diamonds and rubies and emeralds, the stuff she could now afford but had no interest in. Although, a tiny part wishes she could forget the despair and envy she used to feel as a teenager when girls her age would flaunt their jewelry that their parents would gift them. Emma never had that – never had parents who would gift her her first ring or earrings, a boyfriend who would actually buy her jewelry, and she will never have a man who would buy her an engagement ring (that she was sure of).

Amidst her thoughts, a ring caught her attention. It was rather different from Emma's usual simple style. An oval cut diamond surrounded with tiny little round diamonds. It was separate from all the others along with a couple of other more rings sharing the same hefty price tag.

"Elsa has already gotten a ring, love" Emma jumped from Killian's voice in her ear. "Our mother's ring" he added and moved to stand beside her, keeping an acceptable distance from her, his eyes on the rings.

"I was just looking" Emma replied stiffly. Were they talking now? He had ignored her completely since she completely shut him down. And as much as Emma wanted to convince herself that she was relieved, she wasn't. She missed his smirks, and innuendoes, and wiggling eyebrows. But the part that scared her was that it had been just a week! Her life wasn't a movie where love at first sight, or within a week happens. It even takes more than a week for Emma to make friends, let alone have feelings for someone. And anyways, she has always believed that it is better to not feel anything cause usually the thing she feels sucks.

Killian nodded, and Emma shrugged, "Not the jewelry type"

"I noticed" Killian replied, his eyes finding the swan keychain around her neck. He brought his hand up to scratch behind his ear.

"Why do you wear that, Swan?" he asked, finally meeting her eyes.

Emma's eyes bore into his, the deep blue so full of sadness and loneliness, paralleling her own green ones. She clutched the swan keychain and memories of her first and only love flashed before her eyes and while taking a step into Killian's personal space she stated, "To remind myself to never trust anyone again"

And Killian understood.

Emma wasn't shutting him down because she didn't feel the same way as him (whatever the hell they were feeling). She was scared because of the end of her past love that made her create walls high up and strong. And if Emma really did feel the same way as Killian does and if both of these broken souls can create something special, Killian was determined to break these walls.

Notes:

- This was originally going to be a rom-com type hence the title "The Usual Story" but it seems like I can't write anything else but angst.

- There will be a time gap next chapter.

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