A/N: As always, many, many thanks to the superbly dazzling editorial skills of Kaeru Shisho. And, as per almost always, apologies for the delay in updating. Moving across the world tends to be rather time-consuming. One more to go….

Chapter 99/100 – Regrouping:

I was awake before Zechs invaded my room, puppy in tow. I'd been listening to him crashing around the kitchen, cursing up a storm in several languages, slamming the back door. Very clearly not a man who was overly happy with his universe.

I'd been awake before he came downstairs anyway. Today was D-Day.

H-Day.

Zechs switched on the light as he came in, and dropped Jiang on my chest. I gave the little animal a wary look and pulled myself up against the headboard; ten days' acquaintance had taught me that his bladder had an apparently inexhaustible capacity.

'He's not going to piddle on my bed, is he? Heero has this rule that dogs shouldn't be allowed in bedrooms. I'm kind of starting to realise why.'

'Really?' he asked scathingly. 'How utterly fascinating, Duo. Any more little gems of Heero's wisdom that you'd like to share? For your information, it's unlikely that he has anything left inside; he's already decorated our bedroom. At a very inconvenient time, actually.'

'Oh, shit.' I pulled the duvet up, and Jiang tunnelled his way through, the warm, fluffy little body cuddling into my chest.

'Yes, quite,' Zechs muttered peevishly. 'Move over.' The bed dipped slightly as he sat down, sprawling against my pillows, and then jerked a corner of duvet over himself.

'Just make yourself comfortable,' I muttered. 'My bed is always open.'

'Mmm. I've heard that. Come here, you.'

I sighed, but didn't bother protesting as he pulled me closer, resting my head on his shoulder. Not the first time we'd done this, by any means. Wufei wasn't a morning person, and Zechs was a poor sleeper with the lowest boredom threshold in the universe. I was used to him sliding into bed with me, and it was easy to settle against him. Too easy; I let myself snuggle for a minute, and then pulled away, just a little. Damn. I was missing Heero insanely, waking up with him in the morning.

'Why don't you go and molest your own boyfriend or husband or whatever you're calling him these days?'

Blue eyes gleamed darkly in Jiang's direction. 'That's exactly what I was trying to do. Until that damn animal…cock-blocked me. Wufei was very much not happy.'

I smothered a laugh, imagining that little scene. 'I thought he was supposed to be Wufei's dog.'

'Yes, you really know so very little about the politics of relationships, don't you? He's Wufei's little angel when he's good; otherwise, he's entirely mine and it's invariably my fault if he misbehaves. Anyway, never mind that. Tell me something interesting.'

'Yeah, Zechs, you do get that it's the middle of the night, right?' I muttered it through a yawn. I hadn't been sleeping since I'd come home. Jet lag and trying to get used to the quiet at night. And missing Heero in bed with me.

Really missing Heero in bed with me. His smile as he said goodnight; seeing that messy shock of hair on my pillow first thing in the morning. That very special intimacy that comes from sleeping in the same bed, waking up together. Sharing midnight confidences and lazily unco-ordinated first-thing-in-the-morning sex.

The special light in his eyes when he looked at me. The smile that had always been exclusively for me, just me.

Damn.

Stupid Duo, running away from all that, just because of some stupid spat that hadn't even meant anything.

'It's half six,' Zechs said blithely. 'A perfectly respectable time to be awake. Anyway, 'Fei said he was going back to sleep, and I need someone to entertain me.'

'Lovely. Who d'you hassle when I'm not here and 'Fei's doing stuff?' I was a bit curious about that, to be honest. We two had always been the resident insomniacs; at least, Zechs fell asleep easily enough, but he woke up insanely early, and found it nigh on impossible to go back to sleep. This wasn't nearly the first time he'd woken me up for a chat, or to suggest doing something together.

'Oh, I'm quite getting rather good at distracting him. Or restraining myself, when necessary. Successful relationships are all about compromise,' he added airily. 'You should try it sometime.'

'Whatever,' I muttered. 'That little lecture might be a bit more effective if I thought you had even the vaguest idea what compromise meant.'

'I most certainly do.' He winked at me. 'At certain times, it's appropriate to say 'yes, darling, absolutely, whatever you say,' and at others it's necessary to put one's foot down and be a little assertive. The skill is in knowing when to use which technique.'

'Well, it doesn't look like 'Fei's complaining anyway,' I considered. 'You two…it's all good, right? Married life?'

'Absolutely wonderful. Highly recommended, in fact.' He tilted his head slightly as he looked at me, a sheaf of shining blond hair sliding over one shoulder. 'Are you considering it at all?'

I shrugged. 'I dunno. One day, maybe. I sort of asked him, a while ago. Maybe in a year or two, when we sort stuff out.'

He nodded. 'You know, you've been here for over a week and you've been very neatly deflecting any questions about your dear Heero. You don't have Wufei here to hold your hand now; you're going to have to talk to me.'

I shrugged. 'I dunno. I've been missing him.'

'Oh, I think we've all gathered that. Missing the sex, I imagine?'

'Not just that. I just…miss him. You know?'

'More than you missed us?'

'Different.' It wasn't really even a question of more. Just very different relationships.

'Well, naturally. So,' Zechs angled his arm to look at his watch. 'Seven hours until his flight arrives. Are you going to the airport or not?'

'Not.' I swallowed against the kaleidoscope of emotions the thought of Heero arriving threw up. Excitement, happiness, more than a little arousal.

Sheer bloody terror.

'I did ask him; he said he wanted to hire his own car, so he might as well drive himself out here. I dunno; he might end up staying the night in the city anyway, do the tourist thing. He's never been here before, you know. And it's clearly not like he's in a rush to see me.'

I couldn't stop a little stream of bitterness seeping into that last comment. We'd been talking. We'd both apologised, and I'd offered to fly straight back to Italy, but he'd refused, saying he'd come here, once he could clear his work schedule, and offload some cases on to other people. We'd been talking every night, but he'd always hated communicating by 'phone, so it had been pretty stilted and awkward.

'Mm, yes,' Zechs mused. 'Not exactly flattering, that. Not when you were looking for a grand gesture.'

'I was not.'

'Of course you were.' He tugged my braid, hard enough to make me wince. 'Don't lie to me, Maxwell; I know you far too well. You wanted him to race straight here after you, haul you off to bed, spend a couple of days ravishing you, at the very least.' He licked his lips, all too clearly loving the images playing in his perverted mind.

Poor Wufei.

'Now, stop being such a confounded idiot. He's flying halfway across the world to see you. He's hardly likely to stop off for a little sightseeing.'

'He might,' I mumbled. 'Not like he was in a hurry to get here, is it? It's only taken him ten days. He probably didn't even notice I was gone at the start.'

'Oh, I'm sure he did, but he probably appreciated having some peace and quiet for a change. You know, you are an idiot,' he announced, after giving me a long, considering look. 'Even I know about the case he was working on. Do you not maybe think that a deportation case was a trifle more important than you having a tantrum?'

'I know it was more important!' I said defensively. 'I just wanted him to, I don't know. I wanted to be first, the priority. The two of us…it's personal.'

'Mm, yes. I see. You do realise that since all this started, he has done nothing but prioritise you. Think about that for a minute. He abandoned his job at a second's notice to come and find you when we were in India; he took you into his home; he let you abduct him to space; do I even need to go on? He put his life on hold for months, to be there for you. It's hardly unreasonable for him to need to spend a little time getting his career back on course. If you needed him, really needed him, he'd be there for you and you know that. But personal isn't necessarily the same as important.' He tilted his head, looking at me. 'You know, you really do need to get your pretty little head out of that peachy little arse sometimes, Duo. Decide what it actually is you want in your relationship, what you're prepared to give. Do you want to sit at home pouting and moaning if he's late home, or are you actually planning to be a supportive partner in whatever he does, even if that means he's not always around to hold your hand?'

I took a deep breath, feeling just a little bit shaky. Fuck. Didn't that make me sound like the most selfish, self-centred person in the universe. I wasn't that bad. I didn't think I was that bad. Shit.

'Um. Ouch?'

'Tough love, Maxwell,' he grinned suddenly. 'Someone needed to say it. The rest of your fan club are falling over themselves not to interfere.'

That actually made me laugh; he was right. Wufei was practically biting his tongue off not to get involved; Quatre had started covering his ears and humming if I tried to talk about Heero; Trowa clearly wasn't going to go anywhere near our relationship, not even with a barge-pole as wide as space, not after what had happened between us.

'So, since when exactly have you been Heero's number one fan anyway?'

'I'm not.' He looked rather surprised at the question. 'I'm sure he's as much to blame as you are. I can't imagine he's remotely easy to live with.'

'He's fine,' I said tetchily. Fine for me to criticise him, not Zechs Merquise. 'Look,' I swallowed. 'After the War, he joined Preventers and it was the most important part of his life. Now, it's like it's happening again with all this human rights law stuff, and if I complain about it, I'm the bad guy.'

'Don't be so melodramatic,' he said calmly. 'He's just found something he's passionate about, Duo. God, you know him far better than I do, and even I could have guessed he'd need to have some sort of a focus.'

'A mission.'

'Something like that. The problem really isn't that he has something; it's that you don't.'

That made my stomach do an odd little fillip. 'You're right. Shit. I never thought of that.'

'Well, you're not very bright, are you? A good thing you can trade on your looks.'

'Yeah, yeah,' I muttered sourly. 'I can go and be a supermodel or something. Since I can't do any of the stuff I'm actually good at anymore. Blowing stuff up is kind of frowned on in peacetime.

Zechs shook his head. 'Well, you're very different people, aren't you? He's very single-minded about things, you're not. He focuses on causes, principles, and I can understand him loving the law. You're different: you're passionate about individuals. You see so much potential in people, Duo. You never give up on them, and I don't think you even realise it. I know how much you've done for Wufei; all along, you were the one who refused to give up on Quatre. You were so convinced that there was something else going on. And Heero himself. Wufei's told me how hard you tried to befriend him during the war. And me, you had no reason in the world to trust me, but you offered me friendship.' He shook his head, wonderingly, as if he still couldn't quite believe it. 'Pure friendship; nothing wanted in return. I think you were the first person I'd ever met who just wanted that from me. It's still seems…a marvellous thing.'

He looked at me and laughed, flicking one finger against my flaming cheek. 'You are amazing sometimes,' he added. 'Which neatly balances out all the times when you're a self-absorbed ass. There are so many things you could do, Duo. Things you would excel at. You just need to find the right one. I rather liked Heero's idea, actually.'

'This therapy gig he was talking about? Zechs, you don't even believe in therapy. You always say it's crap.'

He shrugged. 'In my experience, yes.' He shifted a little, putting some distance between us. 'Before I met you and 'Fei, I'd been seeing someone. A so-called expert. A condition of my being released from prison.'

I nodded, reaching out to brush his shoulder with one hand. OK, he'd never specifically told me that before, but I'd known. Guessed anyway. 'I'm assuming it didn't go well.'

'Hardly,' he said, all scathing disdain. 'How could it have? The woman knew nothing, but she apparently had some sort of qualification for treating soldiers suffering from PTSD. She had no idea, simply none.'

No idea what he'd been through, I filled in. Treize dying. Libra. Two years in that hellhole of a prison before Relena finally got him released.

Not much I could say to any of that. I did scoot back against him, letting him know I was there. I'd seen his expression too many times in the mirror; the darkness. I knew how he felt.

He sighed, finally. 'I can see that sometimes people are in situations where they may possibly need to talk about things. And surely it's better to get help from people who've been in similar situations and who have survived, than from people who've only read about the subject in textbooks.'

'I suppose. It would hurt like hell though.'

'I know.' He nodded sombrely; probably the only person I knew who had at least some idea. 'Is that a reason not to do something? And it wouldn't have to be your full-time career; you could just do it on a part-time basis, as a volunteer.'

'Maybe.'

'An option, yes? Something you could find value in? A way to help others?' He settled one arm back around my shoulders. 'Right, that's one thing taken care of. Now, let's talk about your handsome Heero. And you are going to be open and honest and forthcoming. Or the hair gets it.' He tweaked my braid and then dangled it for the puppy; Jiang squeaked with delight at the new toy and jumped up to grab the end, so temptingly near his nose.

'Let your dog eat your own damn hair!' I said tetchily, thinking that Heero would never in a million years abuse my poor braid like that. I watched him transfer the pup to his own lap. Cute as kittens. Puppies, rather. Wufei wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of resisting that double act. 'Yeah, maybe, maybe, we needed a little bit of time away from each other. A bit of space.'

'It's perfectly understandable, you know,' he said quietly. 'You did go from years of hardly communicating with each other, to that oh-so-dramatic reunion, and now you're suddenly living in each other's pockets, with virtually no time to process any of it. Of course, it's going to be difficult for both of you. He does seem to be getting better at managing you, though, if he realised how badly you both needed some space, if only to get perspective.'

I don't need to be …managed.'

He chuckled. 'Oh, Duo, sweetheart, of course you do. You've had Wufei doing it for years. Maybe he should write Yuy a memo on how to go about things.'

'God, fuck off, will you?' I groused, rolling over and burying my head in a pillow. 'You're talking tripe. 'Fei doesn't manage me.'

'He does it to both of us, you fool, very elegantly,' he argued, hooking an arm around my neck and pulling me back upright. 'Listen, now. When Heero gets here, I want you to talk to him.'

'Seriously? That's your big relationship advice? I was kind of planning on doing that.'

'Will you just listen to me?' he demanded. 'Or I'll squeeze this dog, until he pees on you. I mean, actual talking. Don't just rush into his arms and tell him you're sorry for whatever inconsequential argument you had last. And, yes, I do know perfectly well that's what you were planning to do. It's what you always do.'

'Know every damn thing, don't you?' I muttered sourly.

'Almost. Duo, arguments don't mean anything, most of the time. You need to address what's lying behind them, and how to resolve it. Do you understand me?'

'I guess, yeah. And, I seriously shouldn't be saying this, your head's big enough, but you're actually right this time.'

Yeah, of course, it was what I'd been planning to do. What I'd done right from the beginning of the two of us, whenever something went wrong. Gasp out a few apologies for whatever shit I'd pulled and then jump him. And it really hadn't ever solved a damn thing.

'Good,' he tapped the side of my head affectionately. 'Don't just let him tie you to the bed, however tempted you are.'

'God. How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not into bondage? Yeah, I get it. Talk about stuff.'

'Not quite as dense as you look, are you? And, Duo, if he tries to apologise for whatever happened, just let him. Don't try putting him on a pedestal; he's not perfect, and it's not fair to expect him to be.'

'Yeah.' I took a deep breath, stroking Jiang with one finger. 'After the War, that's what I did, kind of. He was just so…, he did everything so damn well, and I was totally screwed up. God, he was sixteen, Zechs. Just a kid, and we all put so much pressure on him. Me, 'Fei, Lena. Wanting him to be perfect for us. I can't imagine, now, how he even coped.'

He gave a little shake of his head, eyes suddenly shuttered and sad. Stupid, Maxwell, talking about that time. OK, it'd hadn't been easy, that first year, but I'd been free, with Heero and my friends. Not in a cell, sentenced to death. Not having lost the most important person in my life. 'Sorry.'

'It's nothing. So, any plans for today?'

'Maybe spend some time working on the Jag?' That was his latest acquisition for his collection of vintage cars; a pre-colony E-type Jaguar he was restoring. 'I don't get to do anything like that in Florence.'

'Of course. I'm surprised though; you mean you haven't totally pimped Heero's car?'

I wrinkled my nose. 'God, Zechs, he has the most boring car in the universe. There's nothing anyone could possibly do to make it more exciting. Anyway, he doesn't have a garage or anything, and I didn't really fancy dismantling it on the street with half the city watching. I've really missed tinkering around with cars.'

'Well, there you are,' he remarked 'You've been talking about finding things you want to spend the rest of your life doing. How about that?'

'I don't know. I worked in a couple of garages after the war. It never worked out.'

'Why would you need to work for someone else? You just need to hire a place of your own. You'll find vintage cars easily enough in Italy; you can specialise in that. I know other collectors; I can certainly pass on some references.'

'Um, it's an idea,' I said slowly, thinking about it. OK, I didn't think it was exactly a vocation or whatever, but on the other hand, it would be something I'd enjoy and that I'd be good at; it'd bring in some extra money, and I could do it on my own time. It was definitely a possibility.

'It's an excellent one,' he said smugly. 'All right then; the car this morning. You're sure you don't want to come out with us later? I thought you wanted to see that film we were talking about?'

'Yeah, well. I'd better hang around. Just in case Heero turns up early or something. Oh, shut up, Merquise. And stop looking at me like that!'

He turned the smirk up a couple of notches. 'It's so cute. How smitten you are.'