(Okay, so I wasn't happy with this chapter, so I took some time and changed some wordings. It's pretty much the same concept, but you will notice I added more words, lines, etc. to make the chapter more interesting. I hope everyone likes it so far. I will post another chapter before the holidays. Won't give much away for the next chapter except that I go back to my darker side, yet still with hints of humour. I do hope all those who are reading my story is enjoying it so far. Do let me know what you think or if anything pops in your head. Good or bad is fine with me. Enjoy and thanks)
Chapter 12
"So how are you parents doing," Karen said, turning her attention towards Helen. The last conversation she had with Helen about her parents was a heated debate. She knew her relationship with her parents were strained based on what Helen told her, but she always felt that Helen was holding back, even when she challenged her.
Helen gave Karen a knowing look as if she really didn't want to discuss her parents. She loved her parents, but they always seem to give her a hard time about her career and when she was planning on giving them grandchildren. She always hated when she felt like she was being scolded and defending the choices she made in her life. "Personally I think they should get a divorce and put their marriage out of misery once and for all." Helen said half interested. She knew that her parents weren't happy in their marriage, but she didn't want to get involved in their affairs. When her parents first separated eight years prior it was difficult for both Helen and her brother, but it seemed more difficult having them in a marriage that seem dead in water. It was like a business partnership based on convenience rather than based on love and respect.
"Unfortunately it does happens to a lot of marriages," Gina said, trying to sound understanding.
"Well, if they do decide," Helen said, "I'm sure it would benefit them both." She pitched her voice an octave higher.
"How do you feel about it?" Yvonne said looking over at Nikki who was quietly drinking and observing the conversation.
"I'm not really sure to be quite honest," Nikki said. "What are your views on astrology?"
"Pardon me?" Yvonne said, giving Nikki a puzzled look as if she said something out of the ordinary.
"Astrology, you know, birth signs, zodiacs? That kind of thing." Nikki explained.
"I love the signs of the zodiac, and all the constellation stuff." Gina said smiling at Nikki. She believed that everything had a higher power. "Perhaps your parents are not a good mix on the love chart." She said to Helen.
Helen rolled her eyes at her, "Glad you're so in touch with the Age of Aquarius, you silly bird. But what the hell does that have to do with anything. You don't actually believe in that silly stuff do you Gina."
Nikki turned to look at Helen and said, "Actually, I think there is a lot you could learn from it and maybe you shouldn't be so quick to disapprove."
Yvonne smiled as she shook her head. "I am sure you could, but personally, I don't have much use for it. I don't wait for fate to guide my universe."
"Well, I was thinking there is a lot we do not understand from our universe and…" Nikki started saying before she was cut off in mid-flight.
"Did you know that Nikki as a young child wanted to become an astrologer?" Karen said poking her nose in the conversation. "I hear she was quite the nerdy child." She giggled.
"No, I didn't." Helen said, giving Nikki a playful nudge and grin. Somehow she imagined Nikki reading a lot and being an inquisitive child.
Nikki's nostrils flared and she took a deep breath. "When I was a child, my father came to my school one day for one of those parent teacher meeting and dragged on for hours my prodigious ambition to become an astrology. It was all so embarrassing."
"Embarrassing? Why were you embarrassed, Nikki?" Helen asked.
"Sure he was charming and all, but as a young child I was simply embarrassed as he kept gushing about and at one point I thought my teacher was going to gag him with a rag. I knew she was being polite and she always seemed to go out of her way to give me special attention after that meeting. I wondered if he paid her in a monetary sense." Nikki said, thinking about her childhood. She missed her parents and wished they were still alive to see the adult version of her.
"Sounds like a wonderful father who liked to be involved." Helen said wishing her parents were more understanding and open.
"My dad was the best. But he was making a fool of himself explaining the details of my ambition as if I was going to be a great astronaut someday." Nikki explained. "I know he was really proud of me."
"At least your father was not a cheating lout." Helen said exasperated. The memories did not suit her well, at least one particular memory she has tried over and over to forget.
"And you've never made a fool of yourself over a bloke." Karen said shaking her head.
"I'm no saint, I will confess. But it's not the same thing. He's my father and he was being disloyal to my mother." Helen sighed heavily. "I guess we always tend to relate to our parents as if we were still children. It is rather difficult, maybe even impossible, to see them as ordinary people."
"Try, Helen." Gina said. "Your father is only human, and all men have cheating ways about them. Look at my ex-husband. That sodding git was a selfish bastard who only thought of himself."
"Well," Yvonne said, "At least you had the right sense to kick him out before you lost your dignity."
"Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, but I can sympathize with my mother, if only slightly, about her nagging faults. I suppose she didn't have it easy during their marriage, yet I wonder why my father sticks around. It's like having salt and pepper mixed together with a lethal dose of arsenic."
"By the way, Helen where is your friend Claire," Caroline asked with a coy sneer. "Did she decide to skip the fun?"
"Not to my knowledge," Helen said trying not to sound interested. It wasn't like Claire to show up late for an outing.
"Oh, never-mind," Caroline said. "I think that's her at the front entrance."
Nikki looked over at the door and saw an attractive woman smiling over at their table. Nikki watched as she came over, smiling. As if Gina sensed Nikki's drooling, she nudged Nikki on the arm. Nikki looked over to find a devilish grin on Gina's face. Helen's face became warm when she realised she was jealous of the way Nikki was looking over at her friend Claire.
Nikki got up from her chair and said, "Hi, I'm Nikki Wade," she extended her hand to Claire, "And you must be Claire Walker."
"That's correct," Claire said smiling and looking intently at her. This Nikki Wade was one hot babe. Helen was holding back on Nikki's true beauty. Helen always described Nikki as someone who was intriguing with loads of charm but she held back on the sexy part. Claire wanted to know more about this Nikki who clearly had Helen's attention. At least the was the impression she got out of Helen who seemed to talk about Nikki a little more than usual.
"So, Helen tells me you are helping her with a murder case." Claire said still smiling at Nikki. By now Nikki was beginning to notice Claire eyeing her up and down in a sexually manner. She didn't usually care, but she felt self-conscience with Helen around so near and her friend obvious checking her out. Helen notice too and felt a little pang of annoyance that Claire would be so bloody obvious. Then again, she had no claim to Nikki, but the thought made her feel nauseous.
"Yes, Helen persuaded me to come on board." Nikki gushed.
"Yes," Claire looked over at Helen, "She does have a certain way about her that can persuade someone into doing something for her. She does that to me too." Helen felt uncomfortable that they were so casually discussing her personality. "And she has told me a lot of you too. She talks about you all the time." Claire confessed.
Helen felt a little embarrassed that Claire would be so obvious. She felt as if she was being an open book. "She's over-exaggerating about it." Helen said defending herself.
Nikki laughed inwardly at Helen's obvious discomfort. She was glad that Helen thought about her enough to talk about her to her friend. "I am sure whatever she has mentioned to you about me is all true." Nikki winked over at Helen and smile. "Let me get this round of drinks," Nikki said. "So I want everyone to drink up."
"Nice to see you again Claire," Caroline said. "It's been awhile since I last saw you."
"Something, like that," Claire said, sounding uninterested. She met Caroline a couple of times. Caroline seemed to go out of her way to flirt with her, not that she was interested. She wondered if Caroline flirted with everyone.
"Hello, I'm Gina," she reached over and shook Claire's hand. Claire turned her attention to Nikki who seemed to be glowing as she watched her interaction with Helen. She looked a little different from the mental picture, sexier, or perhaps, being around Nikki made Helen glow she thought.
Yvonne got up, "Have a seat, I'm Yvonne," Yvonne gave way for Claire to sit next to Nikki and Helen. "Is there anything we can get you?"
"Nothing at the moment," Claire said politely. Everyone seemed friendly she thought to herself.
"Helen tells us you teach at a University. Gina said making conversation.
"That's right,"
"Sounds interesting," Yvonne said smiling.
"It can be, but it's a lot of hard work, but I find it rewarding in the end." Claire said. She was beginning to become relax. What she really wanted was to get to know Nikki. She was absolute gorgeous and her type. She did notice that Helen was sitting a little too close to Nikki, which was surprising considering that Helen usually took a long time to open up to people. She could understand since she found Nikki charming and easy to talk to.
Nikki came back with the drinks. "Here you go Helen." Nikki handed Helen her drink and their fingers touched slightly which jolted them both. Helen turned away quickly, trying to be interested in the conversation. Nikki stood for a few seconds before sitting down. What the hell was that she thought! It was the same feeling she got when she was around Helen, but stronger. It wasn't as if Nikki hasn't touched Helen before but this time it was like a bolt of lightning. She wondered if Helen feel it too?
Soon everyone was talking and having a good time. Nikki decided she needed to get drunk and forget about Helen. She was trying to stay neutral as she felt Claire and Caroline flirting with her. But unfortunately, Nikki could only think about being close to Helen who seemed a little distant. It was driving her a little crazy so she excused herself and headed towards the loo. A little while later she headed to the loo.
"What do you mean you've broken up?" Yvonne shouted. Just then Nikki entered the bathroom. She noticed right away that she had entered into a heated debate and felt awkward. She didn't want to seem like she was prying on Yvonne's phone conversation.
"Sorry, did I interrupt something?" Nikki said casually. "Are you okay, von." She asked, worried.
Yvonne turned off her mobile phone and looked up as her eyes were red. "Nikki, I need your help."
"What's going on Yvonne? Your conversation seemed so intense."
"She's planning on coming back home after graduation, to stay that is." Yvonne said apprehensive.
Nikki was puzzled at first. She didn't understand why Yvonne would be against her daughter coming home. "Isn't that supposed to be a good thing? You would see her more often as you have been complaining that you don't see her enough since you sent her off to that private school."
"No, well yes, I love having Lauren around, but we both discussed that after graduation she would spend a year in Europe, doing her internship. I want her to experience a different culture and do the things that I never did when I was a teenager."
"She's not sixteen anymore, Yvonne. I suppose she has a good reason for not wanting to go abroad." Nikki said wondering why Yvonne was dead against her Lauren coming home.
"She told me that she wanted to work in the family business, but I would prefer if she didn't." Yvonne said, looking weary.
Nikki looked at Yvonne. "Is there something you're not telling me?" She asked.
"Look I trust you Nikki, but there are some things I can't explain. You need to trust me on this. I don't want my Lauren to work in the family business. I much prefer her to find her own way." Yvonne said trying hard not to get emotional.
"Don't put too much emphasis and I'm sure things will sort out. She's just trying to find her way around. Just give her time and I'm sure she'll get tired of it all change her mind." Nikki said in a reassuring manner, hoping that Yvonne would feel better.
"I wish I could believe that Nikki, I really do." Yvonne said turning on the tap and splashing water on her face.
Nikki put her hand on Yvonne's shoulder. "Lauren is a bright young woman and I'm sure she'll do the right thing. She needs to do what's best for her."
"I'm sure you're right but she also broke up with her boyfriend." Yvonne exclaimed.
"She did." Nikki responded, not entirely surprised.
"You don't seem surprised," Yvonne said, her brow upright as if Nikki knew something.
Nikki hesitated momentarily then said, "Well, we all go through the break-up stage in our younger years. Did she give you a reason?"
"I asked her why, and she wouldn't give me a specific reason, except that she wasn't in love with him."
"It's just as well if she isn't in love with him then she's doing the right thing." Nikki nodded her head. "It wouldn't be fair to the both of them if she doesn't care for him."
Yvonne stood up and walked towards Nikki, "I know my Lauren well, and she's keeping something from me. I can sense it, but she won't confide in me."
"You know children, always defiant towards their parents." Nikki said.
"It's more than that Nikki. I can't explain it. I was actually hoping that you would talk to her. I know she likes you and maybe she will open up in you."
Nikki looked at Yvonne. She didn't want to get involved. Why must everyone involve her in such sordid affairs? "Yvonne, I don't think that's a good idea. I don't want to feel like I'm spying on her. It's just not right."
Yvonne laughed harshly. "I'm not asking you to spy, Nikki, I'm just asking you to talk to her and see where she's at."
"You don't know what you're asking of me. I don't want Lauren to feel as if I am using her to pry information out of her on behalf of you. That wouldn't be right, not to mention dishonest."
Yvonne placed her hand on Nikki's arm. "It's not like that, I promise. Listen if you feel uncomfortable then you don't have to tell me what she tells you. Just find out if she's okay. That's all I ask Nikki."
Nikki knew that she shouldn't but looking at Yvonne and realising the desperation in her voice, Nikki felt again compelled to say yes. "Okay, but don't expect miracles. It seems like I'm a miracle worker these days."
Nikki found her way to the back and headed outside, where she leaned against the wall taking in the cool air. She was such a sucker. Why didn't she have the good sense to say no to people? Nikki closed her eyes and tried to think of nothing. Thirty seconds later she heard the door being opened and when she opened her eyes she found Helen's head around the door.
"Sorry, I didn't realise you were out here. I came looking for air." Helen said apologetic.
"It's fine. You're free to roam as you please." Nikki replied coldly.
Helen felt hurt by Nikki's cold response, but didn't make much of it. "I can see you're not much for company so I'll leave you alone."
Nikki wanted to kick herself silly for being such a twit. "Sorry, please don't go."
"No," Helen replied hesitantly.
Nikki smiled, "No, stay, and keep me company. Don't mind my sharp tongue"
"It looks like everyone is having a really good time tonight. Even Claire is mingling with the crowd. She's even gotten herself a few numbers, and judging by her actions, she might just get lucky tonight." Helen said cheerfully.
"Well, she's come to the right place then, and she is herself very attractive." Helen stiffened. Why did she care? Yes, Claire was attractive so why did it bother her that Nikki said it so casually.
"Well, you're not so bad yourself, Nikki," Helen blushed slightly.
Nikki looked at Helen, staring at her just a little longer than she normally would, which made Helen feel a little uncomfortable. "Who knows then, perhaps I will get lucky too." Helen was quiet. She didn't know what to say. They stood like that for a few minutes before Nikki broke the silence. "I'm glad you came tonight."
"Really, why," Helen smiled. She felt the warm sensation permeate her body.
Because you make me want to grab you and kiss you passionately Nikki thought, and as an act of bravery leaned forward towards Ren. "Can you keep a secret?" Nikki said seductively. She was going to see how far she could go with Helen. She didn't know why she wanted to. Maybe it was the alcohol in her system or maybe she wanted to feel something.
Helen smiled nervously waiting for Nikki to go on. "You're secret's safe with me."
"I just wanted to say," Nikki leaned back with her elbow against the wall. "That you look really beautiful tonight"
Helen was startled. She wasn't expecting that Nikki would be so blunt. Then realising what Nikki said, her face became flushed and her heart started to exhilarate quickly. Then without thinking Helen said in a low whisper, "You look beautiful too." For some reason she wanted to reach out and caress Nikki's face. She wanted to comfort Nikki, but in truth, she wanted to feel something too.
"It hurts just looking at you," Nikki said clearing her throat, feeling a little high from the alcohol. A sadness crossed her eyes realising she would never to able to hold Helen the way she wanted to.
Helen thought that was the sweetest thing she heard. "Oh, Nikki, that's sweet of you to say." Helen went to place her hand over Nikki's face. Then just as quickly as Nikki heard those words it brought her back to reality. She didn't want to play this game anymore.
"Maybe we should head back inside." Helen was taken aback. Why was Nikki in a hurry to get away? Feeling a little hurt Helen agreed as they both walked back, in silence. Once back inside both couldn't focus. Nikki tried desperately to get Helen out of her head, while Helen felt like Nikki was ignoring her and it bothered her.
"What wrong Helen," Claire asked. Something seemed to be bothering Helen, but what? She did seem awkward around Nikki. Somehow she imagined that there was tension between them. Exactly what was their relationship? Did Nikki have feelings for Helen? Was it something else? She made a mental note to find out.
"Nothing, honestly" Helen lied. She really did not want to get into a debate. She was feeling a little depressed and decided to wallow her sorrow's in alcohol.
"Don't use that line on me, so spill." Claire said, her arms crossed. "You're hiding something from me so don't pull that crap on me."
"Really, Claire, you're putting too much emphasis on it." Helen repeated trying to avoid Clair's glaring stare. "Please, don't give me that I know you're hiding something from me. I don't need to explain myself."
Claire sighed. "Fine, but don't think for a minute that I don't sense something is up between you and Nikki, but have it your way for now."
A little while later Nikki was dancing with Caroline and Gina as Helen watched from the table. "So Helen," Yvonne said. "How are things with you and your Sean?"
Helen cocked her head back. "Things are just fine." Just then a woman approached and asked Helen if she wanted to dance as she politely refused. She didn't want to dance with any woman. In fact, the only person who was invading her mind was Nikki and she wondered how it would feel to dance close to her.
"Look at Nikki," Karen said. "It usually only takes a couple of minutes on the dance floor before hoards of women try to get on with her."
"I can't blame them really," Claire said grinning. "She's bloody fantastic and oozes sex appeal, not many would refuse, I bet." Helen shook her head in disbelief. But Claire was right. All night Nikki was being hounded by women. It made her feel slightly nauseated. She was jealous and she couldn't deny it.
Two hours had passed, the drinks and conversation flowing. They had been regaling in stories of old. Helen realised that now she knew Nikki rather well and also acknowledged that Nikki wouldn't like that much which made her laugh even harder. After the third pint of lager and vodka shots they were both feeling the effects of the alcohol.
"Shite," Nikki proclaimed. "I haven't been pissed in ages," she laughed as she said this, enjoying the feeling of stimulating company and more than glad that her nerves had subsided. She was no longer ignoring Helen and just letting herself have fun.
"I love this song, Nikki," Gina said. "Let's dance." As she grabbed Nikki's hand before she had a chance to get her bearing on and led her to the dance floor as Helen watched the two women move their bodies close to each other. They were playing 'The one that got away' by Natasha Bedingfield.
As Nikki danced with Gina, she kept looking over at Helen who was looking back at her. What was she thinking Nikki wondered? Helen couldn't help watch Nikki. She was mesmerized by Nikki's pure beauty, and the song that was playing was having a melodic effect on her, and the words permeated her skin like a moth to a flame. Something inside her stirred. Something she had been holding back for years. Tonight was different. She was different and she knew it. She had to put a lid on it. If only she could look away, but she couldn't. Claire watched Helen from the corner of her eye. Why was she so fixated on Nikki tonight? Helen was holding back with Nikki, but why? Why was there tension between them? Perhaps Claire was imagining it, perhaps she wasn't. There was only one way to find out.
Once the song was over they made their way back to the table laughing. "Who knew you could dance so seductively Gina." Nikki joked, putting her arms around her.
"Did you notice those all those women staring at us as we danced?" Gina laughed. "And have you know that I'm am a woman with many sexual moves."
"Yeah, but you almost stepped on my foot." Nikki teased. "Are you sure you've never been with a woman?"
"Maybe I'll get lucky tonight and make Mark jealous." Gina laughed. Being with a woman might not be so bad. But then she thought about it and really, the only woman she would make love too would be Nikki. "But if you're serious about me having a gay experience, then maybe you should seduce me tonight." She winked at Nikki which caused Helen to almost cough out her drink.
"Why would Nikki want to seduce an ugly bird like you," Yvonne quipped, grinning as Karen laughed, almost spilling her drink and Claire giggling quietly.
"Could you be jealous?" Gina smiled over at Yvonne.
"You wish," Yvonne sneered. "But you'd better take a number…judging by the many women who keep trying to get Nikki's attention, you'd be last in line."
"Calm down ladies, I'm sitting right here," Nikki said, trying not to laugh. She sensed Helen getting restless, but why? "First rule, never get involved with a colleague. Too much drama. And there's plenty of me to go around." Everyone laughed, except for Helen who was feeling a little sick from the alcohol.
"So come on then Miss Stewart," Nikki smile growing as she accentuated Helen's name once again. "I thought you promised me you were going to show me the high life of dancing." What she really wanted was to slow dance with Helen.
Helen nodded and gathering her thoughts together attempted to stand up. Realising the difficulty she was having with this caused her to double over with laughter. The table fell silent - all eyes were on the Helen as she grasped the table to steady herself. She was unaware of them staring as Nikki proclaimed to Helen. "You my dear need to get some air into those lungs. I think the alcohol is getting to you."
They both made their way out into the cool London air. Nikki pulled her coat tightly around Helen and automatically placed her arm through Helen's arm. Helen didn't know whether it was the cool night air, the alcohol or the closeness of Nikki that caused the spinning sensation in her head. A smile spread across Nikki's mouth as she relaxed against the wall, aware of Helen's thigh touching her own.
"I don't think I feel too good. I think the alcohol is making me nauseous. and I feel dizzy." Helen stated.
"Listen, do you want to leave. I could take you home or if you want company you can come over my place. I really don't mind. I don't think you should be alone tonight." Nikki said, hoping Helen would agree. She wanted to be alone with Helen.
"Perhaps you're right." Helen smiled weakly. She didn't want to be alone yet she was also weary being alone with Nikki.
They both made their way back to the table and Nikki explained that she was going to take Helen home as she wasn't feeling well. Claire offered to drive Helen home but she declined as Nikki was kind enough to offer first. As they left the club Claire smiled to herself. She had a feeling that there was something going on between Nikki and Helen. Yvonne and Karen also both smiled as they looked at each other. Yvonne gave Karen a wink as if to say, 'we need to get those two together'.
They said their goodbyes and hailed a taxi. The ride home was quiet. Helen head felt like a balloon from all the drinking and loud music. Helen motioned for Nikki to stop the car.
"Excuse me Sir, could you please pull over." Nikki asked the driver worried about Helen's state of health. Once the taxi pulled over Helen opened the door and emptied her stomach. She cursed herself for drinking more than she knew she could handle. She normally didn't drink herself into a stupor but she was trying to drink her blues away. Ever since Nikki came into her life she wasn't the same and deep down inside she knew the reasons why.
Once they finally arrived at Nikki's front door, she tried helping Helen but she was feeling a tipsy herself. "Helen, I need you to help me. You need to move your feet." Nikki was beginning to feel a little wound up and wanted to shake Helen.
Helen managed to arose slightly, enough to get to herself standing upright. Nikki struggled with the keys while Helen leaned against her for support. Once they got into the house Nikki managed to put Helen on the sofa. She was about to go and put on a kettle on to make some tea so she would feel better when Helen grabbed her arm.
"Please don't leave Nikki." Helen pleaded. She didn't want to be left alone.
"I'm just going to put the kettle on." Nikki tried to reassure Helen.
"No stay here with me for a bit. I don't want to be alone." Helen looked at Nikki with those big hazel/green eyes. How could she resist.
"I promise I won't be long, Okay." Nikki said, as she lifted Helen's chin up.
"Okay." Helen muttered, her eyes glossy.
Nikki came back from the kitchen with a cup in her hand. "Here drink this," Nikki said, giving Helen English tea. She looked at Helen who looked tired and wanted to hold her and tell her how much she enjoyed having her at her place.
"You're too sweet," Helen said, her words a little slurred. Her head was still spinning but she couldn't tell if it was the alcohol or Nikki sitting so close to her. It gave her a sweet sensation.
Nikki sat next to Helen. She felt a little uncomfortable at fist. She didn't know what to do or the right words to say. Helen was drunk and she knew she probably wouldn't remember anything. Even though Helen looked worst to wear Nikki felt compelled to hold Helen in her arms. In truth she wanted to feel her close. She felt selfish for thinking it.
Helen looked into Nikki's eyes that seemed to be a bit more bright this evening. "You're beautiful NIkki. Do you know that?" Nikki didn't know what to say. She knew that the alcohol was talking and that Helen was in no shape to know what she was saying. "I mean that Nikki. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I'm sorry if I was ever rude to you." Nikki continued looking at Helen.
Nikki couldn't resist Helen's honesty. She was beautiful herself. "That's okay Helen I know that you didn't mean to be rude." Was all Nikki could manage to say! All she wanted to do was kiss Helen and feel the intense emotions that were permeating her body.
Nikki ran her fingers on Helen's face making Helen close her eyes feeling the warmth of her fingers.
"You have beautiful skin." Nikki said feeling like she was submerged in Helen's sexuality. She could barely keep a straight face. Just then Nikki lowered her head and captured Helen's mouth. Nikki's lips felt warm and soft but before Nikki could deepen the kiss Helen jumped up from the couch.
"No Nikki, please don't." Helen turned away afraid to look into Nikki's eyes.
"I shouldn't have done that." Nikki felt embarrassed and foolish for kissing Helen in her state.
"No you shouldn't have."
"I'm sorry Helen. It won't happen again." And with that Helen laid back on her couch closing her eyes wanting to block everything out.
"Excuse me, I will just," Nikki said leaving the room, not knowing what to say, as if anything she said would be acceptable after allowing herself to take advantage of the situation. Why did she allow her emotions to get the better of her? How will this affect their working relationship? Her only hope was that Helen was wasted and probably wouldn't remember what transpired between them.
When Nikki left, Helen ran her fingers over her lips. She couldn't believe Nikki just kissed her. What she couldn't have imagined was the affect it had on her. It rocked her foundation. In truth, that short kiss awakened her desires. She was starting to feel flushed and a wet feeling overcame her. She tried to snap out of this dream that she thought she was under. It doesn't mean anything. I'm sure loads of women have felt this way. It's just a passing moment she kept telling herself. She had to block it out. She would pretend that she didn't remember. She didn't want Nikki to feel uncomfortable when they were together. This was shite.
When Nikki came back with more tea she found Helen fast asleep. She was a little disappointed but also felt a huge relief. She slowly removed Helen's shoes and went to find a light blanket to cover her. She watched Helen sleep for a few minutes and thought how beautiful she looked sleeping. She looked like an angel. Then Nikki bent down and kissed Helen's forehead.
"Goodnight Helen, you probably won't remember this in the morning." And with that Nikki went into her bedroom.
Helen woke up with a massive hangover. Her mouth was dry and brittle and her eyes felt drained of its colour. She couldn't even remember how she got there. When Helen tried to get up her head felt woozy like the room was going to spin 'round. She had to lie back down because she felt like she was going to pass out. I'm such a friggin' nutter she thought to herself. Why do I allow myself to drink too much? Helen anguished while struggling to get herself off the bed. She needed a shower badly. She smelled of stale alcohol and her mouth tasted like an old shoe.
When she turned her head towards Nikki's bedroom she noticed that her door was opened. She finally got up and notice a note on the coffee table. 'Went for an early run. Be back soon' the note stated. She knew this was a perfect opportunity to slip out of Nikki's place and head home. She would leave Nikki a note explaining she would see her back at the office. She knew she was being a coward but she needed to get home fast and deal with life later. She couldn't remember the night event 'cept that she was jealous that Nikki received so many offers. Once Helen arrived at her apartment she made her way to the bathroom she tried to remember how she got to Nikki's loft. It was going through as broken segments. She remembered drinking too much and getting sick. Helen started to sweat excessively and her stomach was doing a number on her. When she reached the sink she emptied whatever was left from last night. Damn, she knew that she needed to get her head straight. She mustn't allow herself to drink to a stupor.
Helen turned on the shower and removed her clothes slowly. Once inside the shower the warm water felt wonderful on her skin. She allowed the water to caress her head feeling the ripples drip off her body and then she felt mortified. She closed her eyes and began to remember the events. She couldn't remember it all but she remembered Nikki kissing her. Maybe it was a dream…no, she knew better. What she couldn't remember was Nikki's reaction. Shite, Helen chastised her mental state for being such an ass. Why did I go and allow the kiss? Well I know bloody why, 'cause she gorgeous and she makes you feel like melted butter. How in the name of Heaven, am I to act in front of her now? She knew Nikki would probably be disgusted by her own actions and knew that Nikki might want to avoid her. Maybe I'll pretend to not remember she thought to herself. Helen decided that if Nikki didn't bring up the kiss then she sure wasn't about to rehash it. Helen got dressed and decided brew some tea. She needed a distraction right now. She knew that she would have to worry about the repercussions later.
Helen's doorbell rang. She wondered if she should answer her door. What if it was Nikki? Was she ready to face her so soon? Then again it could be work she thought to herself.
"Hello, and good morning." Helen said, her voice cracked as she opened the door. "Did you come to check on me dear?"
"Did you just get in?" Claire asked, grinning at Helen who looked like she hadn't slept in years.
"Just about an hour ago." Helen said looking at Claire who had a knowing look on her face.
"So, where did you crash last night? At Nikki's place?" Claire smiled giving Helen a demure grin in return. "Did you get a shag by any chance?"
"Take the piss, why are you so interested in my sex life?" Helen said in disgust. She had a headache and she couldn't believe how intrusive Claire was becoming. "Nikki's just a good friend who was kind enough to take care of me in my mental state."
"Is that all. You're so guarded all of a sudden and I am not being intrusive when I know you're hiding something from me." Claire said standing her ground. "I know you were drunk last night, but that doesn't explain the sexual tension between the two of you."
"What are you getting at?" Helen said, defending herself and yet feeling exposed.
"Look, I'm your best mate and I notice these things. I just want you to know you can talk to me about anything." Claire said, reaching out and rubbing Helen's arm.
"I got so pissed last night that I can't even remember what I did. I woke up this morning in a strange surrounding until I realised I was at Nikki's loft. Gosh, I can be so incorrigible at times." Helen sat down with her tea and a couple of biscuits.
"So Nikki a perfect gentlewoman and nothing happened?" Helen gave her a judgmental look.
"Would you prefer if I said we made mad passionate love all evening." Helen looked at Claire who was grinning widely. "You're unbelievable and I can't believe you would think so low of me or Nikki."
"So what did you two end up doing?" Claire gave her a curious look. "How was your ride home with Nikki?"
Helen almost choked on her biscuit. Does anything get pass her? "What is that supposed to mean?" Helen tried to avoid the question. "Nothing happened. I fell asleep on Nikki's couch. She was kind enough to take me in. That's all."
"Why do I get the feeling you're avoiding something." Claire glared at her. She knew by Helen's body language that something did not add up.
"Give it a rest, please," Helen said rolling her eyes over Claire. "I like Nikki, but it's not what you're thinking. I feel comfortable with her and I trust her with my life." Helen said, realising what her words meant.
"Listen Helen, I don't know what's going on with you and Nikki. I sense attraction from Nikki and in all honesty I sense it from you too. I believe you fancy her more than just a friend and maybe that's frightening to admit but I sense a crisis within you." Claire gazed over at Helen, arms crossed. "Nikki's a babe. And I'll be honest I find her very attractive and if I felt that she was into me I'd me on her like shit on a fly."
Helen was flabbergasted that Claire could read her so easily. Was she easily read like an open book or did Claire understand her like no one else. Would she lie to Claire or tell her a little something? She took a deep breath. "Okay, honestly, I do feel some attraction towards Nikki." Helen wasn't about to confess to love. "I think I just feel flattered by Nikki's attention. But she's a woman for God's sake. I shouldn't be feeling this way."
Claire gave her a weary look. "Look Helen, it's none of my business but I hope you are being honest with yourself and your feelings for Nikki. Don't lead Nikki on if you're just confused. I think she really likes you. And then there's Sean your fiancé." Claire said. "Are you being honest with him. Do you even love him? Because I always believed that you're just running from things."
Helen felt incensed but she knew Claire was right and that bothered her. "I know what I am doing and nothing is going to happen with Nikki."
"I'm you're best mate and I'm just concerned. You're judgement is not always right when it comes to past relationships."
"What are you banging about. You must have me confused with someone else." Helen spat back. "Listen, nothing is going on between me and Nikki. First of all, I am straight and engaged, and I'm not interesting in getting myself into a situation that I can't handle." Helen said trying to convince Claire and herself that she had the situation all under control.
Claire looked at Helen suspiciously. She knew that Helen could be playing a dangerous game with Sean and Nikki, considering Sean jealous nature. She knew she had no right prying but she also knew how Helen avoided difficult situation. She could understand her attraction towards Nikki as she seemed very charming and witty. The short interaction she noticed between Nikki and Helen was electrifying and there was no denying that both woman felt something. She knew Helen would try to control her feelings as she did in the past, but she didn't believe Helen would be able to fool herself but Helen had a certain glow about herself when ever she mentioned Nikki's name. She never looked at Sean that way or had that glow when she was with him. She knew Helen was making a mistake if she allowed herself to get married. When Helen first hooked up with Sean, she thought Sean was not right for her. But she didn't want to run Helen's life. All she could do was be her friend.
"Listen, I'm just going to the office. I need to get some work done. I'll see you later." Helen said feeling tired and weary.
"Okay, but if you need someone to talk to, I'm all ears." Claire squeeze Helen's arm. "I just want you to be happy. You can trust me babe and I love you silly bird."
"I love you too," Helen replied. She squeezed Claire's arm. "Thanks."