Alaia Skyhawk: I'm not sick or dead lol. I've just slowed the updates down again now that I've hit 50k words for NaNoWriMo. Those two weeks I was updating every day, I pretty much had no life outside of writing. Hence I've eased back a bit now so I can do other things too :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Rise of the Guardians, the Guardians of Childhood, or any related characters etc. This story is written purely for entertainment purposes.
~(-)~
Chapter 92: A Christmas to Remember
A head of white hair peered around the corner of the passage, blue eyes checking down the wood-panelled hallway for a certain furry figure. You could be forgiven for thinking this was December, and that Jack was 'Sneaking into Santa's Workshop' as per the usual annual routine... Except that it was the 22nd October and every time he spotted a yeti other than Phil, he ceased his lurking and strolled along the hallways as if at the Workshop just for a casual visit.
Nope, he was here for something entirely different.
Jack continued his search of the building, giving a passing nod and sly grin to North when he chanced by the Russian. It was a grin that North returned, before discretely pointing towards the nearest set of stairs.
"He's down near reindeer stables. I made sure he be easy to find today."
Jack chuckled and winked.
"Why that's very considerate of you, North. Would you also be open to giving him the rest of the day off? I have an invitation for him."
North nodded almost solemnly, but his eyes were glinting with mirth.
"Phil is good worker, so of course he can have rest of day off. You can tell him he has my permission to go."
"Thanks."
Jack strolled onwards, still chuckling. North had come back home yesterday with the agreement to act like nothing was going on. The aim being to leave Phil without the slightest hint as to the prank about to take place. With North's directions, finding Phil wasn't difficult. The yeti was sweeping the hallway near the stables, and in the pause before approaching him, Jack for once really looked at him.
It was hard to tell how old a yeti was just by looking, unless you knew exactly what to look for. Grey fur wasn't an indicator, and so the only way to get a hint was to look at the yeti's fingers. Because that was the only place clear of fur, where the wrinkles of advancing age would be visible.
Phil's hands were showing those signs of age. Not so much as to say he was elderly, but certainly enough to show he was of advanced years. Jamie had been right, when he pointed out that Phil wasn't so young anymore.
Jack sighed softly to himself and then started to smile. Before the day was over, old age wasn't going to be a problem for Phil anymore.
The Spirit of Winter flew down the passage towards him, acting as though he'd only just spotted him in this search and not watched him for over a minute.
"Phil! There you are!" He landed beside the yeti. "You have my even greater respect for finding and out-witting me so fast every year. When it's my turn to try to find you, it takes me over an hour!"
Phil set aside his broom, murmuring a query, and Jack grinned as he pulled a square of paper out of his hoodie's pocket.
"It's Jamie's twentieth birthday today, and he's invited you to come. Plus the kids at Santoff Claussen really want to meet 'Phil the Yeti'. I've been telling them a few of the stories. Will you come? I've already asked North, and he's fine with you having the rest of the day off."
Phil pointed to himself, chattering in Yetish with obvious surprise.
'They want to meet me? At Jamie's party?'
Jack nodded eagerly.
"Yeah! Even Jamie has grown up hearing about your exploits, but in all his visits to the Workshop he's still never actually talked to you. Will you come? We can go there right now. The party has already started."
Phil was still staring, but then smiled and gestured dismissively towards his broom. He could come back and put it away later.
Jack responded by opening a mirror to Santoff Claussen and bodily pushing Phil through it. When they emerged at the other side, right in the middle of the village and all the tables and things set up for the party, the Guardian of Fun then shouted out.
"Hey kids! Phil the Yeti is here!"
Within moments Phil was surrounded by chattering and cheering children, all clamouring to hear his side of the stories about Jack sneaking into the Workshop. All the kids understood Yetish, and so with barely any hesitation at all Phil sat down on the grass and started telling them about all the different ways and things he'd done over the years to thwart Jack Frost from getting into the toy factory.
Jack flew over to where Jamie stood munching away on a piece of birthday cake, and the young wizard glanced at him.
"Stage One complete, eh?"
Jack chuckled, rubbing his hands together with glee.
"Not quite. We need to get Sophie over from Katherine and talking to Phil too. She'll rope him into games once the stories are done. We want him worn-out on his feet by the time the sun starts to set."
Jamie's expression turned wry.
"I'm guessing that's when I'll finally get the chance to chat with him."
Jack's grin turned sly.
"Yeah, for about half an hour. With what I've planned with Ombric, Phil won't be in any condition to talk after that."
Jamie let out an exaggerated sigh and ran a hand through his hair.
"Then I guess I'll just have to invite him to my birthday party next year, too. At least then you won't be intent on wearing him out."
The two of them settled down to watch Phil and kids, and Sophie when she came over and led the inevitable games afterwards. The children all wanted a turn at being Jack, to pretend to sneak into the Workshop and be caught by Phil. It was essentially an extended game of tag, but for all that the children couldn't fly, their on average small size actually made them rather hard for Phil to catch. Enough so that by the time the children were worn out and the sun was setting, so was he. In fact he looked almost relieved beneath his happy smile, when the various parents began to usher their children home to bed so they wouldn't miss getting dreams from the Sandman.
Without any prompting from Jack, Jamie chose that moment to approach the yeti with a plate of birthday cake.
"So, did you have fun?" He offered the plate. "I made sure to save you some. The kids would have eaten it all otherwise."
Phil accepted the plate with thanks, and followed the young wizard towards and into Big Root. Inside it, Ombric was sat with both Jack and Tsar Lunar. The sight of the latter-most causing the yeti to stop in surprise and chagrin. He'd not even noticed the Man in the Moon was at the party!
Interpreting Phil's expression, Tsar Lunar chuckled and smiled.
"Do not worry. I took no offence that you did not notice me. Indeed, I was rather entertained by watching you having fun with the children. You have made them very happy with your visit."
There was a flicker of a wistful expression on Phil's face, before he hastened to the seat offered to him and sat down murmuring that he'd enjoyed himself a lot too. He'd never had the chance to meet human children before, not like this.
As everyone began to talk about the day, Phil listened absently as he ate his piece of cake. His thoughts were clearly wandering, so much so that he had to be nudged before he noticed the mug of hot chocolate floating in the air waiting for him to take hold of it.
He set down his now empty plate, and again with thanks accepted the offered item. And if his drink had been liberally spiked with brandy, he was too tired and distracted to notice it. He actually gulped it down, thirsty from the afternoon of storytelling and games, and it was almost immediately replaced by another steaming mug of chocolate... Incidentally, also spiked with brandy. With cake being the only thing he'd eaten since early morning, by the time he was through his fourth mug of the beverage he was starting to sway in his seat.
At that point all pretence of normal conversation stopped, as the four men present then watched and waited until the moment Phil tipped out of his chair and started to snore.
Jack tried and failed to smother his laughter.
"Stage Two complete." He glanced at Tsar Lunar. "Moment of truth. Let's see if he really does wish it."
Tsar Lunar nodded, closing his eyes in concentration. While he'd chosen to touch Pitch, back in the past, as evidenced with every other immortal he'd created he didn't have to do so. All he needed was to be within range, and this range could be considered 'point blank'.
After a few seconds his eyes opened again, and he sighed softly even as he nodded to confirm it was done.
"Such a deeply rooted wish, and a desire to continue to help make children smile. This is no recent thing. He has dreamt it for many years. Once he knows he has been granted it, his joy will know no bounds. It is a pleasure to fulfil such a wish," the corner of his mouth turned up in a smile, "even when it is to remain as a surprise. I have set his Range of Belief over the valley where Burgess lies. He is already in receipt of a more than reasonable degree of power... Be cautious, Jack. Once he knows what he is, he is likely to find some new ways to best you in your 'game'."
There was a note of humour in that latter bit, and Jack grinned.
"I wouldn't have it any other way." He stood up from his seat and began to conjure a mirror. "Right, Stage Three complete. Time to pack him off to bed for Stage Four!"
Jamie smirked over the rim of his non-spiked drink.
"You mean watch and wait to see if, when he wakes up, he notices he's a Legend Immortal or if he only notices his hangover?"
Jack nodded, even as Ombric began using magic to levitate Phil through the mirror to the room where North was waiting for the yeti's return.
"Exactly."
~(-)~
An agonising clanging was what woke him, seeming to shatter his eardrums as he rolled over and then attempted to blot it out by stuffing his pillow over his head. It took him a few moments to recognise that it was actually the rather sweet-toned and melodious bell that rang in the yeti living quarters at the Workshop. To signal the start of each new day, and the time to get up and go for breakfast.
Phil lifted the pillow away, blearily opening his eyes and groaning as he sat up. He didn't need to ask if the hot chocolate last night had been alcoholic, his pounding headache told him all he needed to know. At a party for a twenty-year-old wizard, he supposed in hindsight he should have guessed the after-party drinks would have added 'kick'. He had only himself to blame for not paying attention and downing about... Actually, he couldn't remember how many.
Phil stood up and trudged over to his wash-stand, a glance in the mirror above it revealing that thankfully he'd not spilled anything on his fur. He did, however, look as though he'd been in a hurricane and then dragged through a hedge backwards. The only recourse to fix that, being to pick up the over-sized brush with its two-foot long handle from where it hung beside the mirror.
Anyone who complained about brushing the night-time tangles out of just a head's worth of hair, should have a go at being a yeti. It took Phil a full ten minutes to sort all his out and get himself looking neat again.
Head still pounding, Phil left his modest room and joined the ranks of others who were also on their way to the dining hall. A very large room filled with row upon row of tables, with a team of disgustingly cheerful yetis working behind the serving hatch having been awake for over an hour before everyone else.
He trudged over, one look at his expression prompting one of the servers to place a very large mug of steaming strong coffee on the tray he'd picked up from the stack of them. By the time he reached the end of the row of servers, he'd also had several other 'hangover cures' added to his tray. No one asked questions. Not surprising since there were several Yeti festivals and occasions where ending up with a hangover was practically mandatory. And of course the Workshop did have its few residents who got drunk and hungover every Sunday, their day off each week. Phil just usually wasn't one of them.
Phil sat down and worked his way through his breakfast, feeling altogether better afterwards and yet... something still seemed 'odd'. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, not even after going back down towards the stables to retrieve his broom and resume his task down there. He felt sort of 'lifted'. Supported maybe? Oddly upbeat? After a day of musing over it he still couldn't put a name to the feeling. And by the time he went to bed that night he'd come to one conclusion.
He felt like that because he'd finally gotten to personally meet human children and make them smile. He felt like this, because he'd finally gotten to do part of what he wished he could do. It might not have been everything he hoped to do, but it must have been enough to lift his depression about it.
Phil would have been far less philosophical, and not have shrugged it off, if he'd known that Jack and North had both been secretly checking up on him all day.
~(-)~
October came to an end, November rolled by, and December arrived along with the usual frenetic increase in pace among the yetis that worked at the Workshop. The elves got underfoot as they always did, stealing cookies and running around the place trailing ribbons and gift-wrap everywhere. It was an inevitable increase in cleaning duties for Phil and the rest of the cleaning staff, but at least they didn't have North breathing down their necks about Christmas deadlines like the toymakers did. Indeed things were normal enough to be almost boring for Phil, until the day mid-December when a trickle of cold air down the back of his neck made him set aside his broom with a grin.
Jack had arrived, and at this very moment would be creeping towards the toy factory.
Phil chuckled to himself, running over all the possible routes. Getting into the Workshop itself, there were far too many to count. But to get into the toy factory itself there were only six. Jack never approached the same potential entrance twice in a row, which immediately discounted the entrance on the top floor. He'd tried to enter from the ice caverns direction the year before last, so that direction wasn't likely this year either. The other four were all fairly close to each other, spread across the intervening floors. It was a simple thing to patrol between them and use a certain ability particular to Yetis.
When you live on frigid mountain peaks, where storms happen often, you get a sixth sense for them. Jack's power always held a hint of possibility for such storms, and hence so did his presence even when he pulled his powers right in close. As soon as Phil sensed a touch of 'storm' in the air on his patrol, he immediately headed down whichever passage he'd felt it come from.
The route took him downwards, not to the bottom levels but close enough. And finding himself close to the forge where the resident yetis made their weapons for in case of emergencies, Phil side-tracked into there to grab a bucket of ashes.
He kept it behind his back as he walked, until an odd sense of increasing chill had him stop just before turning at the next junction of the passages. Instead he frowned a little in confusion, before shaking his head and getting his bucket ready to take aim just in case... And so the instant Jack peered around the corner, the Spirit of Winter got the entire contents of the bucket thrown into his face.
Jack went down spluttering and gagging on a mouthful of ashes, not putting up any resistance as he was then picked up by the scruff of his cloak, divested of his staff, and carried to the nearest window to be thrown outside. When he landed in the snow he grabbed handfuls of it to scrub his face clear of the worst of the black dust, before he then turned to look up at where Phil smirked at him from one of the Workshop's windows.
"All right, you got me fair and square! You've got a week's break before you better watch for me for Round Two. Make sure you have cookies ready for our after-catch chat!"
Phil laughed and nodded, waving before he shut the window. He didn't see the speculative look Jack gave him once his back was turned, and so didn't realise he'd found the Guardian rather faster than the usual.
~(-)~
It was the time of his second attempt for the year, as Jack lingered outside the Workshop trying to decide how he'd enter. Phil had a knack for knowing where he was, but being there ready and aiming with that bucket of ashes was above the bar even for him.
Immortals often developed skills related to their 'task' and their own will. Phil seemed to have gotten a better sense of just where his quarry was lurking. It was going to make getting to the toy factory a whole lot harder.
Jack smirked and flew for the upper windows, breaking with his tradition of not using the same route two years in a row. If Phil stuck to the usual routine, he'd be nowhere nearby, and probably wouldn't catch on until it was too late or at the very least Jack was almost to one of the factory entrances.
Or at least that should have been the case in theory, because Jack got barely halfway before he flew into a snare made of ribbon and was pulled entangled from the air to land in a heap at Phil's feet.
Jack looked up at the yeti from where he lay sprawled on the floor, while Phil looked down at him with eyebrows raised. And then Jack let out a resigned sigh and held up his hands in surrender.
"Yep, you got me. Now how about getting this stuff off me so we can go have those cookies?" Phil laughed for a moment and then obliged, pulling Jack to his feet as the Spirit of Winter laughed as well. "Are you getting better at this, or what? I normally get a lot closer than this. You got a new trick you're not telling me about?"
Phil looked a little perplexed, shrugging after a moment before replying in Yetish.
'No, just lucky this year... I think.'
Jack noticed the hesitation but said nothing, and instead let out another sigh.
"Ah well, we still got two great stories out of it.' Ashes to the face', which the kids loved when I told them it two days ago. And now 'Ribbon lasso master'. Feel free to do the ribbon one again in thirty years, just promise me not to do the ashes one again." He winced. "I was spitting grit for three days."
Phil laughed and patted him on the shoulder, the two of them strolling to the little room where the yeti had stashed some cookies where the elves wouldn't find them. The two of them talked for over an hour before Jack made his excuses to leave, but the Spirit of Winter didn't actually go that far before backtracking to North's workroom via an ice mirror. Once in there, he then glanced at the Guardian of Wonder and shook his head in amazement.
"Phil still has no clue. I think we're going to have to spell it out for him."
North tapped his fingers on his beard, thinking it over before his expression turned sly.
"I think I have just the way to do it."
~(-)~
Christmas Eve arrived, the entire Workshop staff breathing a collective sigh of relief when North started up the delivery spells and set off in his sleigh. Mass clean-up began, and tools were inventoried and packed up to keep them out of elvish hands during the two-week holiday rest before the whole annual routine started up again. Wonderful smells emanated from the Workshop's kitchens, a veritable feast in the making to celebrate another successful Christmas. Most of the yetis would receive their share at the staff dining hall, but a handful each year were picked to dine with North and the rest of the Guardians.
This year, for what was the second time in nearly two centuries of employment, Phil's name was among them.
He was rather surprised when he read the list, which North always posted in the staff dining hall just before he set off. It wasn't unheard of for someone to be picked twice, it just didn't happen often. No one knew for sure how North picked those who got to dine with him, but most assumed he just drew names out of a hat. Once you'd been picked, your name didn't go back into the hat until after a century or so. After that, you might be picked again. That was the theory, and in truth that was exactly what North did. It was just that this year he'd picked out one less name from the hat, and added Phil's to the list.
Once the mass clean-up was done, with a couple of hours to spare before North would get back and the Guardians would arrive, Phil went to get ready. He started with a 'shower', which in yeti terms meant a scrub down with a bucket of fresh snow. After that he returned to his room and gave himself a good brush, before taking extra care to make sure his top-knot of fur was just right.
He then sat and waited, occasionally peering outside into the polar night to look at the stars. Without a sunrise to show the time, he only knew North was back when the big bell at the top of one of the towers began to chime joyfully. Signalling that the deliveries were done and it was time to party.
Phil and the other three lucky yetis all headed for the Globe Room, where a long table had been set up near the hearth and already the Guardians were gathering. There was also a new addition, in that an extra place setting was there for Tsar Lunar. The Constellation smiling cheerfully in greeting when Phil and the others arrived to take their seats.
Phil found himself next to Jack, who almost immediately began chattering about all the places he'd been able to give a White Christmas to this year. Christmas cards were also being passed around by the Guardians, who being immortal didn't give big gifts since otherwise they'd end up with a veritable horde of them over the centuries. That wasn't to say they gave nothing though.
Tooth's cards came with Christmas-coloured floss for after the meal, Bunny had supplied the clockwork toys that were inside all the Christmas crackers, and Jack had made several temporarily thaw-proof ice centrepieces for the table. Sandy had added extra sparkle to the decorations, and North was providing the food. There were few besides the yetis, who knew North had been making inventions and selling patents for all manner of gizmos to mortals for centuries.
If anyone had bothered to trace a Russia and Canada-based company presently called Northcraft Industries, which specialised in sustainably produced lumber, they'd have found that ninety percent of the profits were spent on raw materials for toy manufacturing and on food. It was one of North's spells that had also allowed Tooth to corner the 'market' in dropped coins, without having to allocate any of her fairies to coin-collecting duties. It was little things like that, such as the knowledge that Bunny had his own automated underground cocoa and sugar farm and an egg-golem run dairy cow ranch, which none but those who worked for the Guardians would know.
Those things also tended to be the topics of conversation at the Christmas dinner table, such as Bunny's complaints last year about his Tribe of Myth middleman who had almost used the money from selling the manure from the ranch as fertiliser, to buy the wrong proportions of coloured pigments for paints. Sure Bunny was capable of manufacturing the pigments himself, but if he did he had nothing to do with the funds he got as a side-benefit of his in-house dairy for chocolate making.
It had to made a yeti wonder, when they knew that two of the Guardians practically operated non-for-profit businesses, and that a third did her work thanks to humanity's habit of dropping coins without noticing. Without coins, Tooth would have to rely on North's company and his yeti staff for little trinkets to hand out instead.
Although in Bunny's case, he might soon be able to offload his dairy farm. Jack had been negotiating with the Selkies, for the ranch to be moved to their farming valley since they kept cattle there already. The Selkies would become Bunny's new broker, and get the pigments for him using money made from milk-products during the months when chocolate wasn't in production at the Warren, with a small cut taken off for themselves. He'd get rid of the cows, and they'd get additional income; Win-Win situation.
Phil sat in almost bemused silence, as those very topics and their related matters did the rounds while everyone waited for North. The Guardian of Wonder always personally saw to the reindeer being fed and made comfortable after the delivery run, meaning he always arrived about twenty minutes after everyone else.
And when he did arrive it was with much booming laughter, a few quips about 'close calls' with children waking up while he was in the house, and then a hearty sigh as he planted himself onto his chair and took a big gulp from his waiting cup of eggnog. Then and only then were the covers lifted from the food and the feast began.
The guests loaded up their plates, wine was poured for those who wanted it, and then North raised a toast to yet another successful Christmas. It was in the pause between the main course and the arrival of the pudding, when everyone began picking up the crackers next to their place settings and pulling them. Bunny being the first to do so, and read out his joke.
He chuckled before he started, glancing at the yetis.
"You guys will agree with this one... Why is Christmas like a day at the office? You do all the work, and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit."
North pulled a face at that one, but not really annoyed as everyone burst out laughing. In retaliation, after pulling his cracker, he pointedly looked at Bunny when he read out his joke.
"What do crackers, fruitcake, and nuts remind me of? You."
Jack almost doubled up with laughter at Bunny's responding 'Ha ha, very funny', but then he nudged Phil with his elbow.
"Hey, you've not pulled yours yet. Come on, let's see what joke is in yours."
Phil picked up the cracker, letting Jack grab and pull the other end. After the resulting 'snap', and the mandatory inspection of the clockwork toy and donning of the paper hat, Phil then unfolded the scrap of paper that had been with it...
...He then went wide-eyed in an expression of utter speechlessness, not a single word escaping his mouth as both Jack and North began to attempt to smother laughter, and even Tsar Lunar was chuckling.
Confused, Tooth, who was sat the other side of Phil, plucked the paper from his grasp and read it out with eyes that went almost as wide.
"Happy Christmas! You've been a Legend Immortal for two months!"
There was a collective gasp, before Jack got his laughing under control and regarded his table-neighbour wryly.
"I heard from Jamie that you were worried about who would help me make 'sneaking into Santa's Workshop' stories once you retired. So I asked around, and arranged it with North and Tsar Lunar. Happy Christmas, Phil. If you want to be one of my Lieutenants, and my official helper for the 'sneaking in' stories, the offer will always be open."
Phil turned his head slowly to look at him, seeing that cheerful smile and a glimpse of Tsar Lunar's nod of confirmation. He then yanked Jack up into a huge hug, so tight the Spirit of Winter couldn't help but squirm against it as Phil the Yeti began to blubber in joy into the front of his fellow immortal's hoodie.
The other three yetis at the table all got up to come around and congratulate Phil, just as the servers did when they arrived with the pudding and found Jack still helplessly laughing and protesting for Phil to put him down and stop hugging him already.
It was to say probably the most memorable Christmas Dinner the Guardians had ever had, and perfect as the first one Tsar Lunar had ever attended. And for Phil, nothing would ever top it either, ever.
~(-)~
Alaia Skyhawk: There you have it. I'll update again in a few days :)