D: Disclaimed

BlueAnchor: Sebastian tried to avoid contact altogether; he hasn't been able to control his powers yet. The vision in the truck, of Jacob being hurt, was a memory that I'm surprised no one really recognized. It was the time of the newborn battle in Eclipse where Jacob saves Leah and ends up hurt. In a way, the pain he felt there somewhat compares to the pain Jacob has been going through throughout the years, which is why Sebastian had picked it up so easily. I had been trying to find some way to incorporate that into the story, but it seems difficult to do so. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

Chapter Seven

I've changed my sheets more times than I could count.

Blood stained my pillows; the constant reminder of just how different I was from everyone in the world. My door remained locked, as I demanded, refusing to let anyone –including my parents- to bother me.

None of this was for the fact of Jacob's admittance, well… not anymore. It revolved around all of the lies. From everyone. I couldn't forgive, especially when I wasn't sure what to forgive everyone for.

Do I forgive my parents for leaving me here? Couldn't they have given me a proper explanation rather than have me believe that this was the safest place for me? If their decision was based on Jacob's request, then why not tell me? They were my parents; their explanations should be excusable for being my mother and father, wasn't that their right to tell me this rather than withholding information because Jacob had requested?

Why couldn't Jacob just leave me be if he wanted nothing to do with me? I'm not exactly familiar to what an imprint was, or could be. Sure, Jacob had explained, but to a certain degree, it seemed a bit farfetched. But then again, why would he admit to falling in love with a teenage boy? What kind of sanctum could he receive for that? Why would he go through the mishaps just to tell me now? And now he says it's my choice.

But what is choice? I've never had options. Decisions were always made for me without my consent. I felt enabled to figure it out because I couldn't weight the possibilities of my decisions. I didn't want to regret it. I wanted more to it. I needed it.

It then goes back to my existence, somehow. Before I had the chance to prove myself, it was already sought out to be me being dangerous. A child with the definition of a killer, and yet, I had no victims to proclaim the label. I still like to see myself as a harmless teenager, but others beg to differ.

My grandfather saw me as an experiment. Carlisle had never really showed his appreciation for me now that I had come to think of it. Any chance he had, he would always call me in his laboratory to run a few tests. He told my parents that it was crucial that he studied me for the reasons I could answer some questions for any future hybrids. I was his grandson, but I felt more like his lab-rat more than anything.

Of course this appalled aunt Rose and uncle Emmett. I've mentioned it before. But, why hadn't they told me? It was noted that aunt Rose always had a clear mind when it came to me, but uncle Emmett was a different story. Though I'm sure he meant it in no way offensive to me, but it still bothered me when he would make homophobic comments. My father says that its just who uncle Emmett is. He means no harm, but it still bothered me that he seemed close-minded about it all. Would he still make those comments now that he knows I'm supposedly tied to Jacob? Would he still love me as a nephew or shun me away for it? Would I still have my uncle and aunt to comfort me when I needed them?

I know nana Esme would. She had always made the effort to converse with me whenever she had the chance. She always hugged me and kissed my cheek whenever we'd see each other, but that was rare in my case. Her cold touch was hardly soothing compared to grandma Sue's warm embraces. But I couldn't blame nana Esme for it.

Grandpa Charlie and grandma Sue have always been my rock. I see no reason to forgive them when I felt that there was nothing to forgive them for. They raised me; they stepped in my parents place for me to have some sort of a normal childhood. But waking up, greeting the first people in the morning as grandpa and grandma, was far more different than actually saying good morning to my mom and dad.

I could tell that it had bothered my grandparents to see me this way. The only time I had unlocked my door was for them. Grandma Sue would often sit with me at night to comfort me. She hadn't urged me to speak, but more or less informed me that she was here to listen if I needed to say something. Problem was, I just couldn't.

What was an empty feeling was now a panging in my chest cavity. My heart felt heavy. I used to feel like a hollow shell, but now it was more like someone had just poured cement into my body. I had never felt this weak. I wasn't feeding; I wasn't sleeping like I should be. I haven't slept in four days in fact. I was hurting too much.

It came to the point where I had fallen asleep because my body could no longer take it. My eyes became heavy, my breaths weakened, and what used to be dreams, were nightmares. All consisting of my loneliness, and me succumbed to the desolate life I was becoming accustomed to. Even then, I was beginning to loathe how depressing I was sounding.

But the warmth was different. I wasn't sure why; but slowly, I was regaining feeling. The nightmares slowly transitioned into dreams –dreams that were tolerable. It was comfort, something I was hardly familiar with. I couldn't understand why my body felt as if I was being wrapped by a heating blanket. None of it was making sense.

Until I had opened my eyes to see a naked chest pressed against my cheek. The blood from my tears dried out and crusted on the russet skin. I looked up to see the teary expression of Jacob Black. Before I could push away in a panic, he pulled away and stood up faster than I could react. Grandma Sue came in as soon as he exited.

I lay on my bed, confused and a bit content from what had just happened. Grandma Sue sat next to me, retrieving a soaked cloth from the basin on the nightstand. She had wiped way the tears and assured I'd be okay. I was speechless, but my mind was running a marathon with questions I just couldn't word out. Before I could ask here why Jacob was here, lying next to me without anyone against it, she had left the room.

Why was he crying?

Instead of changing my pillowcase once again, I tossed it aside and rolled over with no one other than Jacob on my mind. It was a strange feeling; like whatever was holding me back, was lifted by Jacob. I was beginning to think that maybe I had accidently transferred my emotions over to him somehow, making me lighthearted and he, disconnected.

Was that the effect of the imprint?

Could death really be the consequences of a denied imprint? Was Jacob suffering because of what I had done, what I'm doing? Or did he make the entire thing up? I wanted to believe so much that he was over-exaggerating the situation, but something told me, somewhere in the back of my mind, that he was telling me the whole truth.

I wanted to be upset with my grandma for letting him in, but mostly –I was grateful. Appreciative for the reasons I was still unsure of.

If this was the outcome of all of this, shouldn't I at least be given the choice without the drastic consequences? I've never had the opportunities of living my life yet, and now it felt as if everything that was mine was being stripped from me. I couldn't let Jacob suffer for this, even though he had done the same to me, I just couldn't. That wasn't me.

Even if I tried, after all of this, I wasn't sure if I could go into survival mode. I had proven myself weak the moment life turned bad. My family wouldn't let me venture on my own knowing that I could easily fall apart. They'd base every situation I would come to face on this reaction.

I could rebel. But what use would that have for me? I'm a teen far beyond my knowledge, and I've known too well that this could do more harm than good. I'd be cutting connections to those who meant a lot to me. I'm not happy with my family, but I couldn't turn away from them either. That's just not who I am.

"We wanted to tell you." My mother sat across from me next to my father. "But it just wasn't something I could tell you."

"I've heard the story." I stated the obvious, finally eating the food grandma Sue delivered to my room. "But what is yours? You guys haven't told me your side."

"What is it you want to hear?" My mother asked. My father didn't seemed to pleased, "No Edward, he needs to know."

"Know what?"

"Why we hadn't said anything." She moved closer. "You see Sebastian, a part of the reason we needed to leave you here was because of Jacob. I knew you'd be safe here because of him. I knew that if you came with us, we'd be on the constant run for protecting you, it just seemed to be the only option that you'd be guarded by Jacob and his pack."

"Why couldn't you tell me about the imprint then?"

"Because, it wasn't our place." She rubbed my arm, "you see Sebastian, Jacob has told me what an imprint is, and I've seen the effects of it with the other wolves. Just because Jacob hadn't accepted it at the time, didn't mean that he wouldn't go through lengths to get you back. He'd be on a rampage, and that would mean harming himself and us just to have you next to him."

"You met the pack?" I asked, somewhat shocked.

"This is part of the story I never wanted you to know." She looked down; my father grabbed her hand to soothe her. "But it seems essential rather than keeping anymore secrets."

"That would be nice." I said in a sarcastic tone.

"Before you were born, your father and I have met in high school." She paused, "I fell in love with him the moment I had laid eyes on him, and after discovering who and what he was, I found myself to never want to leave his side if that had meant I could spend an eternity with him. Unfortunately, after a few misguided incidents, your father had chosen to leave in hopes to keep me safe from the supernatural world."

I could see that it bothered my father to hear this, probably more than once, but that hadn't stopped him from kissing my mother's hand as if she had been the only one who existed for him.

"During his absence," She took a deep breath, "Jacob had come to my rescue. He mended a lot of the broken pieces long enough for your father to return. During that time, he had shown me that life existed beyond my love for your dad, and that I could possibly move forward with knowing that I'd live a normal life, that was until I thought Jacob had abandoned me the same way your father had."

"So you have felt the loneliness?"

"Much of it." She sighed, "when Jacob began avoiding me, I was too stubborn to walk away without a plausible explanation. I haven't seen him in months, and after finally going to see him, not believing that he could just end our friendship so suddenly, he was a changed man. The Jacob I knew didn't seem to exist anymore, and in his place was the much taller and more masculine friend I used to know."

"He said he loved you." I added.

"At that time, I didn't know, or much rather didn't want to believe." She admitted, "I only wanted a friend, and I needed him to understand that. But after being fed up with his willingness to avoid me, I had approached Sam and the pack because I was sure that they've gotten him into the trouble I thought they had constantly caused." She paused for a moment, "I punched Paul. After that, he phased and Jacob had come to my rescue. It was then; I've come to realize that I've asked for more than I bargained for. I blamed Jacob and his pack for the killings going on around the time, but sooner found out that it had been a nomad that had been hunting for me. Jacob and his pack were protecting his people."

"I thought that once I went to save your father from making a mistake in Volterra, things would be better." She sighed again. "Your fathers return was assurance that I would never be alone, but unfortunately, Jacob hadn't given up on his advances. He was furious to find out that I demanded I be changed after my graduation, but that was before he had told me about imprinting. I believed at the time that he had imprinted on me, which made it hard for me to let him go. But he had told me that he was sure it would happen eventually, so…" she looked at my father before looking back to me, "he kissed me."

"He kissed you?" I looked at her shocked.

"I avoided Jacob from then on, but something in me had wanted him near and I wasn't sure what it was." She then rubbed my hands again, "at the time the nomad had returned with a newborn army, Jacob and his pack had offered to help, and that being the first time that both our family and his pack were civilized with each other. Until he discovered that your father and I were engaged."

"Why didn't he leave after that then?" I asked, still somewhat upset.

"Because I begged him to stay." She said.

"Why would he listen to you after that, I mean, you had already turned him down," I stated, "what was his reason then?"

"Because I gave him assurance that he still might have a chance with me," she looked down to avoid my gaze, "I kissed him."

"You kissed him?" I muttered, "you kissed him?" I pulled back in disbelief.

"I didn't want to."

"But you kissed him!" I stood up, now pacing the room, "you kissed him and you didn't think of the consequences of it all. Why didn't you stop her?" I asked my father, but he remained speechless, "did you even want to?"

"I wanted her to choose life over death Sebastian." He finally spoke. "I hadn't wanted her to become what I am, but your mother saw it no other way, and Jacob was so sure that he could change her mind. It's not like Jacob had tried to deny that he was obsessed with your mother."

"What?" I stared at both of them in disbelief, "you mean to tell me that it was always about you mom?"

"No, it was never like that." She stood up next to me and pulled me in for a hug.

"No mom!" I pulled back, "I'm supposed to believe that someone loves me for me before admitting that he had been in love with my mother. To Jacob, I will never be his first choice, we all know that."

"No, he stayed close because of you." She stood in front of me, holding my cheeks in her palms, "in some way, his reasons for wanting to be near through all of the pain was because of you. I've carried you with me the entire time, and somehow, Jacob knew this."

"But even you said that he denied the imprint at first." I choked the words out, "he never wanted me."

"That's not true." She argued.

"ISN'T IT?" I shouted, "his denial goes to show that he would have never wanted me if it hadn't been for the imprint. In some sick way, it had forced him to feel the emotions that should never exist. He loved you first mother –a girl –a woman, sheer proof that he had never thought of another man in such a way. No matter how you put it, I'm his and your biggest mistake."

"Don't you ever say that!" I've never been hit by anyone, but to be slapped by my own mother, she seemed to be an entirely different person. My father's expression had matched mine, unsure how to react. My mother face bore in regret; I knew she'd be pleading for forgiveness after this, I just wasn't sure if I could give her that.

"SEBASTIAN!" She shouted for me the moment I had walked out the door, slamming it behind me. I was sure the hinges had come loose because the door had fell in. But that hadn't stopped me from storming out and making my exit.

Ignoring the watchful eyes of the family I used to trust, I sat in the car and turned the ignition before reversing onto the street and out pulling out of sight. I had no destination set in mind, and it probably wasn't good for me to be driving anywhere, but I needed to get away until I could gather what had just happened.

For once I hadn't balled my eyes out. Crying was pointless now to me. My mother had just slapped me, and honestly, I thought it only happened in movies. But I must have stricken some sort of truth to get a reaction out of her, that or I could be completely wrong about it. Either way, I hadn't been so lost.

I could imagine by now that my father was giving her a lecture, but I couldn't bring myself to care. What kind of a mother hits her own child, even if they had gotten out of hand? I'm guessing she most likely forgotten that I was half human too because I could see the bruise beginning to form on my cheek through the rearview mirror.

My mind must have been wandering far off because by then I had noticed the 'Welcome to Port Angeles' sign up ahead. I wasn't sure why I had come here, but I knew it was far from Forks for now. I needed to clear my head before I could even go back, if I wanted to go back.

For some reason, I found myself at a café that seemed familiar to me. I hadn't bothered really looking at the place other than noticing that the place was a bit quiet. The tables were covered with checkered table clothes that had matched the curtains. The waitress was an older woman, her hair curled and grey that was topped with a waitress hat that matched her pink dress and white frilly apron.

She gave me a smile and asked for my order. I hadn't felt much like eating, so I ordered water for the fact I just needed somewhere to sit and think. Thankfully she hadn't questioned me nor bothered me in any way. She was a generous woman, and I guess she had seen the confusion I had, so she had offered me a piece of pie on the house. I thanked her and delved into the deliciousness of the apple pie.

A deep familiar chuckle pulled me out of my daze. I hadn't noticed I was being watched until I realized that my uncle Emmett stood in front of me. He wore a black leather jacket over a white V-neck shirt to match his faded jeans. He pulled out the chair across from me and sat down. The waitress had already made her appearance, and then leaving after uncle Emmett had told her that he was fine.

"I don't want to hear it uncle." I turned to look out the window again.

"Hear what?" He chuckled, "I only came to see how you were holding up."

"I feel like shit." I admitted.

"I could only imagine kid," He said, "I'm not surprised you ended up here too."

"How did you know to find me here?" I asked.

"It's simple really." He shrugged his shoulders, "whenever your grandpa insisted on testing you for reason we didn't care for, your aunt and I had noticed just how much it bothered you, so we would always bring you here to cheer you up."

"That's why it feels familiar." I admitted.

"Did you have the strawberry shortcake yet?" I looked at him confused, "oh c'mon, don't tell me you don't remember begging us to bring you here just for that?" I shook my head.

He called upon the waitress and gave her his order. "I don't have any money uncle."

"Who said you're paying squirt." He chuckled. "I miss our alone times kid, and your aunt and I haven't stopped talking about when you'd be coming home." I sighed, "but something tells me that you don't even want to do that anymore."

"I don't know what I want to do anymore." I admitted, "I'm so confused."

"Listen Seb," He leaned forward with his elbows rested on the table and his hands joined together, "your aunt Rose and I always wanted to tell you about the whole imprint crap. But we didn't want to end up filling your head with false hope, especially since Jacob was never sure how he felt. Believe me, there were times I wanted to beat the crap out of the guy for having that hold onto you in some way, you deserve your freedom Seb just like the rest of us."

"I thought you didn't approve of it." I blurted out.

"That's just me Seb." He sighed again, "I was never good with being considerate of other people feelings and sometimes my words jump out of my mouth before I realize that I have made myself look like an idiot. Love is love kid, I could and never would judge you for what decisions you make. I love you kid like you're my own."

"So the homophobic remarks were never your truce?"

"God no." He laughed, "That was me being that idiot I can play out to be. I always tend to forget that there could be a chance you might end up with Jacob."

"I doubt it." I muttered to myself.

"Listen kid," he leaned forward again, "I'm not saying to love the guy, but you can't fight what you feel inside. I may not be the best in the love field, but I know enough to know that you always looked at Jacob the same way I look at your aunt Rose. Whether you pursue a life with him, or even any other man, just know that I'm going to stand by you with whatever decision you make."

"Really?" I asked.

"Just promise me one thing squirt."

"What?"

"Don't string Jacob along the same way your mom did." His expression showed no humor, "I've seen the effects of it all, I witnessed the anguish he went through going against his own people, his own family just make your mother happy. If you're going to love him, love him. Don't give him false hope and take it away because you want something else. I may not be a fan of wolf-boy, but no one deserves to be plagued with constant rejection."

"But he rejected me first." I deadpanned.

"Yeah I know," he replied, "but I think it was more because he feared that you would never accept him. He cut off the connection before he could end up the same broken heart from your mom. I could see his side, knowing that the world could judge him. He would never have the choice of loving someone else without knowing that he could be hurting you. I think the comparisons of an imprint and a bondage between us vampires are very similar."

"How so?" I asked.

"Because the moment I've met my wife, I knew she was the one, and always will be." He smiled and thanked the waitress as she placed the cake in front of me. "I know your aunt Rose will be my only, and my last. If something ever happened to her, I wouldn't hesitate to follow her. The suffering happens in similar ways as an imprint, except ours is by choice, Jacob's wouldn't be. I could try to live my life without your aunt, but I would see no point. Jacob however, would never have a life without you. If something happened to you, he would shut down and join you not long after."

"How do you know this?"

"Because, during the times of our battle between the Volturi and all of us, we studied their kind as well as them studying us." He continued. "Sam had mentioned a case of a rejected imprint. Every symptom of it was similar to how we would feel, and because of the wolf that was rejected, the wolf had disappeared and was never heard of."

"Why wasn't I informed of this?"

"You probably were, you just didn't think much of it at the time." He said, "Ask Jacob. Speak to him and start from the beginning."

Taha Aki. Now I do recall of Sam's story. It's just the importance of it all wasn't acknowledged for the fact that I was running for my life. His wife's sacrifice had also been the end of his imprints existence. Leaving him to grieve as much as possible before disappearing and never to be heard of.

Would Jacob do that?

"Carlisle has called upon Nahuel and his aunt Huilen to help you adjust to who you are." He added, "he figures that Nahuel will be able to help you gain control so you can make your decision to whether you want to come home or stay with Jacob."

"Are those the two that were at the house?" He nodded. "How can he help me, I'm sure I'm able to control myself?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know, I've told him the same thing, but he feels its best that you at least talk to the guy. Just talk to the guy and find… hold on." He stopped to answer the blaring phone ringing in his pocket. "Okay, I'll be there in as soon as I can."

"What's wrong?" I asked unsure.

"Jacob and your parents have sort of ended up in a feud."

"What? Why? How?" I stood up right away.

"Because your mom hit his imprint." He stood up and grabbed his coat. "Something your mom should have thought of the moment she laid a hand on you."

"Would Jacob harm her?"

"I sure hope not."

A/N: I've updated the cover picture with my vision of how Sebastian looks, others might have a different person in mind, which I'm okay with. This is just how I see him, somewhat. Also, if I hadn't PM'd you, I apologize. I've been trying to keep up with it as well as the updates I've been trying to read and review. So I want to thank everyone who had reviewed as well as favored and alerted, it means a lot to me to know that you all like this story.

Shout outs go to lytebrytehybrid88, Hank's Lady, Demon2Angel, Guest, XXCrazyWriter96XX, Shalette, Guest (BlueAnchor), FreeSpirit15, LrafaelxD, Little Red Ace, The betrayer hunter, rAbiDmutt03, SoundShield11, FallForYourType, and sportsallstrs2.

Much Love,

TurnItUp03