ONE WEEK LATER
It had been the longest week of his life, he had banged out of work the last few days, being so close to her without being with her was almost too much to bare.
That and the ass kicking he received at the hands of Kevin Atwater.
They'd thrown hands before the time they both went under at Cook County, he was scared shitless then, but this? This was different.
Last time Kevin didn't want to kick his ass, but in order for it to 'work' he had too.
This time though? Adam was certain Kevin thoroughly enjoyed beating the shit out of him. His jaw still ached along with his chest and left side of his torso, Kevin wasn't playing and made sure he knew it.
To be honest he didn't blame Kevin.
If he could have kicked his own ass he would have.
He ran his hand over his still sore jaw, a bruise hiding beneath his now untidy beard. He stunk, his apartment stunk, it was as if he stopped living the night Kim broke off the engagement.
His calls to her going unanswered, he knew he needed to make it right.
It was time to do more than just do the talking, he needed to do the walk.
Kim set her radio on the shelf, politely smiling at Roman as he headed out, their partnership had been strained.
It was just a few days after she called the engagement off that he showed up and on her doorstep, flowers in hand.
He wanted more than a friendship, he confessed to her that he had feelings for her and had since that day in the warehouse when she had saved his life.
She chewed him out and ever since then it had been incredibly awkward, it was part of the reason she had put in for a transfer.
She needed a fresh start one away from both Adam and Sean.
One man she loved with all she had, and one she felt betrayed by. She couldn't help but feel as if put doubts in her head on purpose all for his own twisted agenda.
"Sarge, you have a minute?" She asked Platt.
Platt looked at her over her eyeglasses, a stack of papers in her hand that she'd rather deal with, "Not really, but I know that doesn't make a difference to you Burgess" she huffed.
Kim rolled her eyes, "My transfer? I put in for it a few days ago. Will it be approved?"
"That?" Platt smiled sarcastically "I put it in the circular file" she replied, "you're not going anywhere skinny britches"
Kim felt her shoulders slump, "With all due respect.."
Platt waved her hand around, "I won't allow you to run from lover boy" she leaned closer to Kim, "as for Surfer boy, he's out starting Monday. Sending his ass to the 27th"
"Surfer Boy?" That was a new one, "Care to elaborate?"
"Blondie. You know, the one who falls in love with every vagina that wears a CPD badge" she huffed, it had become clear what Roman's game was.
Kim was stunned, "he asked for a transfer?"
Platt shook her head, "No. I took initiative . I'm not losing you. You're good police, Roman? He's alright but he's not you"
Kim didn't know what to say, her mouth hung open.
Platt rolled her eyes this time, "A thank you will suffice, Burgess" she smiled, "Don't count Ruzek out just yet"
Kim turned to leave, stopping on a dime, "Thank you Sergeant" she knew that Platt was in her corner, and was thankful the transfer had been declined.
It was an impulse move and one she wasn't proud of.
She wouldn't run from Adam, she would show him how strong she truly was. That she would be okay without him, though she hoped it wouldn't come to that.
"Ruzek!" He pounded on the door, this had gone on long enough. Sure he may have lost it the other night at Molly's he just couldn't believe he had hurt Kim. "C'mon man, open up!"
Adam heard Kevin's booming voice and pulled t-shirt from the floor hoping it didn't smell too bad and slipped it over his head, "I'm coming!" He yelled, picking up his pace, finally opening the door.
"You here to kick my ass again?"
Kevin sighed, "Man, I'm sorry." He folded his arms across his chest, "You're my boy. Kim? Adam, she's family. She's my sister. You dicked her over and broke her heart"
Adam stepped to the side, "Come in"
Kevin nodded, "How are you?" Though it was evident by the state of his apartment that he wasn't good at all.
"Awful" he sat on the couch pushing aside a laundry basket overflowing with dirty clothes, "Have you seen Kim?"
Kevin searched for a place to seat, finally pushing aside the newspapers and took a seat in the recliner, "Hung out with her the other day, she put it in for a transfer" he knew Kim would kill him for telling Adam, but he wanted him to know.
Adam hung his head, "How the fuck did I screw this up? Kev, I can't breathe without her, I don't want to live without her.."
He knew all of that to be true, it was true for both him and Kim, "Do something about it, before its too late" Kevin had heard rumblings that Sean Roman had made a play for Kim. He was another one he wanted to pay a visit too, but had yet to do so.
"What does that mean?"
"Kim's a beautiful girl Adam, she's not going to wait around for you. Someone is going to make a play for her, and probably sooner than you think" he hinted.
Adam nodded running his palms down the length of his sweats, "I know. Just don't know how"
"Sure you do" Kevin stood up, "I gotta go. You should really consider a shower and a shave"
Adam smiled, "Thanks Kevin. Look out for her, will you?"
Kevin paused in the doorway, "You don't have to ask, I will always look out for her. I won't let anyone hurt her, not even you"
"Hey, 'Mister I Can't Keep It In My Pants', get over here" Platt called, Sean glaring at her, she pulled a pair of keys from the hook, "here, and you've got a new partner"
Sean was perplexed as he took the keys from her outstretched hand, "Why? Where's Burgess?"
"Don't think I don't know what you did" she glared at him, her eyes almost burning a hole in him. She was furious that he would stoop so low, "It was a shit move, and because of that you won't be working with Burgess and this is your last shift at the 21st"
His jaw dropped, "How'd you know about Kim?"
She huffed, "I was born at night...but not last night" she turned her attention to the computer screen, "you're lucky Ruzek hasn't kicked your meddling ass"
He felt his gut churn at the mention of Ruzek, "You can't transfer me"
She roared with laughter, "Like hell I can't, I just did. You'll love the 27th" she smirked, "try not to fall in love with your next partner. Now, get out of my district and finish your shift Patrolman"
"Whatever. This is bullshit" Roman complained.
Platt couldn't take it, "No it's not. Bullshit? Bullshit is putting doubts in your partner's head over her engagement and then moving in on her when she's hurt and vulnerable that's bullshit my friend"
Adam froze in place when he saw her she had her back to him, "Kim" he touched her elbow softly, she turned to face him. He could see the pain flash across her face, "can we talk?"
She could see the bruise along his jaw, he had shaved his beard. She had asked him to trim it numerous times and he always refused. "You shaved" she remarked the bruising on his face not going unnoticed, "Kevin do that?" She wanted to touch his face, she needed to touch him.
In effort to calm her desires she took a few steps backwards, she wouldn't give in to her desires not until she knew he had changed and the he was over his commitment issues.
Adam smirked, "He did. I had it coming though, it's not that bad. Nothing compared to how I hurt you"
"Adam.." She held her hand up, "Not here, and not now"
Adam felt the air leave his lungs, "Tonight? Please, we can grab a drink or two at Molly's" he'd much rather have her at his place but he knew she'd decline.
Sean was nursing his third beer of the night, he was sick over everything that had transpired but most of all he was sick over losing Kim.
Why did he constantly fall for his partners, Kim was one of if not the best person he knew and he hurt her.
He couldn't help himself, Adam dragging his feet made it so damn easy. Yes, he put all the ideas in her head, even went on and on about his cousin Seamus who was engaged five times and never married one of them. It wasn't his fault Adam agreed to pushing the wedding back , despite what Platt thought this wasn't all his fault.
He would only regret that it cost him Kim, that he had destroyed their partnership and worst of all their friendship.
The place was pretty dead, it's what made it so easy for him to hear her voice from across the bar, it made his heart skip a beat.
He approached her, "Kim, I...I don't know what to say" he offered a blush creeping across his cheeks, he really did feel bad.
"Nothing to say" she leered, her anger still fresh. Showing up on her doorstep a bouquet of flowers was bad, but when he tried to kiss her that crossed the line.
Kissing him would have been like kissing her brother, how did he not realize that? That she viewed him as a brother.
He rocked on his heels, "Platt transferred me"
"I know. I didn't have anything to do with it" she didn't know why she felt the need to explain anything to him.
"This thing with Ruzek, it's not my fault"
She inhaled sharply, "Maybe not, but you certainly exploited it, didn't you? You took every chance you could to put doubts in my head. Why?" She could feel her eyes well up with tears, "I love him, and you knew that. You didn't care though, did you?"
"That's not it" he grabbed her arm, Kim immediately pulling it from his grasp, "I do care. Obviously too much, I love you Kim" he admitted.
"Sean, you don't love me" she glanced over her shoulder wondering who had heard his admission, "I hate this for us, but I can't be friends with you. Not after what you did"
She turned and left him at the bar, hoping that he'd leave soon and Adam would arrive. For the first time in a long time she was hopeful that maybe her and Adam would be able to work things out.
He handed the bills over, he knew at the end of this night, no matter what happened he wouldn't be driving.
He'd either be drunk off his ass or hopefully going home with Kim.
A lot was riding on tonight and he hoped his words would be enough.
That she would understand and forgive him.
He pushed the door open and spotted her right away, the look on her face was like a knife to his heart.
She was miserable and he was the reason why.
Slowly he approached her, "Hi..."
She smiled warmly, "Sit down" she told him holding her hand up, "Are you doing okay?"
"No" he told her his voice soft, "I don't think you are either"
"You think right" she attempted to joke, "You wanted to talk?" She nervously picked at the cork coaster on the table, "at least you did back at the district..I'm guessing you still do now but if you..."
Adam couldn't help but laugh, as she rambled on. It was her tell, if she rambled incessantly it was because she was nervous, "Kim, breathe" he reminded her, "and yea, I wanna talk. We have a lot to talk about, you put in for a transfer?" He accepted the beer from the waitress and set it down, "Thanks"
"You bet" she smiled, "just shout if you need me"
"Platt tell you?"
"Nope. Atwater" he leaned back against the bench, "you love the 21st, don't leave because of me, please reconsider"
"I can't"
Adam felt like shit, "Why not?"
Kim smirked, "Platt denied my request. It wasn't just because of you" she explained, "though I won't lie it was part of the reason"
"I'm sorry" he told her for what felt like the millionth time, "I've been thinking a lot" it was all he could do. It was part of the reason he had called in sick so much the last week, that and facing everyone and seeing the looks of their faces was enough to kill him.
Everyone in intelligence had taken a liking to Kim, and he knew they had all been furious with him for hurting her. Kevin and Erin most of all and neither one held their tongue or fists when it came to the subject.
"Me too" she told him, she had done a lot of thinking as well.
"Can I go first?" He asked her, it was taking all the restraint he could muster to keep from touching her.
His body actually ached for hers.
She nodded wordlessly encouraging him to go on.
He took a deep breath, "I know what I want" he let his hand creep closer to hers, stopping just short of touching hers, "I want you"
Her eyes became misty at his declaration, "Adam..."
"Let me finish, okay?"
"Sorry" she smirked.
"I want all of it with you, the wedding, the honeymoon" he wiggled an eyebrow suggestively earning a genuine smile from Kim, "the house, the kids, the white picket fence" he paused, "even the fucking mini-van, I'd even be one of those crazy soccer dad's that Dawson is always ragging on" a chuckle escaping his lips.
"Are you sure?" Kim was hopeful but she needed to know that he truly wanted it.
"Absolutely" he grabbed her hand, "Kim, I've been miserable the last week, I've never felt so lost, I wasn't sure what was up and what was down" he studied her hand, "Being away from you has shown me that being apart from you is not an option. I know I pushed back the wedding, that I made everything difficult. I fucked up because I was scared. I won't lie I still am, but I know it's worth it" he met her eyes, "It won't be easy, life never is but with you by my side I can do anything"
Kim reached up and wiped the tears from her cheeks, "Adam, I love you. I love you so much and I made a few mistakes too" she could see Sean still sitting at the bar, she knew she needed to tell him, "I need to tell you something but promise me you'll stay calm and you won't flip out"
He felt the pit return, "Kim, I don't know if I can, you're scaring me" he watched as her eyes kept glancing over his shoulder, "what is it?" He asked as he glanced over his shoulder spotting Sean Roman.
"Is it him?" He tossed his thumb over his shoulder, Kevin's words coming back to him, was he the guy Kevin was talking about?
He'd wasn't blind he had seen the way Sean looked at Kim, he suspected Sean had a thing for her but out of respect for Kim, he trusted her implicitly.
Kim ran her hand over Adam's forearm, "He may have put doubts in my head" she was speaking in almost a whisper, "Correction, I put the doubts in my head, but he played on them and added to them" she could see Adam tense, "Adam, he's not worth it, he showed his true colors when he showed up at my doorstep"
"What?" Adam was flabbergasted, it took all he had to not rip Sean from the barstool he was sitting on and beat the living shit out of him, "What did he do?"
Kim glanced at her hand, "Tried to kiss me, he says he loves me" she got up from her side of the table and took the empty spot next to Adam, not only would it ensure that he'd stay put she wanted to be close to him. She needed to be close to him.
He was encouraged by her action, he draped his arm over her shoulder bringing her close to his chest, "Kim..."
She cut him off, "Adam, he's not worth it. I should never have taken his advice"
"What advice?"
"After I found out about Nicole" she watched as Adam hung his head, "He told me to give you a test"
Adam was confused, "A test?"
"Push the..."
"Wedding date back?" He finished her thought, "That's what that was all about? Kim, I wasn't sure what you wanted, I figured if you felt it best to push the date back who was I to argue. Yea, I guess I could have fought you on it but my own fears or insecurities, whatever you wanna call it. Took over and I just went with it" he confessed.
Kim traced circles with her index finger on his thigh, "I should have talked to you, not Roman. I should have brought my fears to you" she leaned back against his chest, "he exploited my fears Adam, he kept telling me you'd never marry me"
He could feel his blood boil, he wanted to pummel him but fixing his relationship with Kim outweighed his desire to kick the shit out of Sean Roman.
"I will marry you, if you'll have me" he was hopeful, "I'm not gonna lie, I'm terrified and it'll be hard but I will do all I can to make you happy and be the husband you deserve" he lifted her chin with his index finger, "let's go tomorrow to the courthouse and let's get married" he wanted her to know he was serious, "I want to be your husband Kim, I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy"
He licked his lips as he focused on Kim's eyes, he ran his thumb across her cheek, "Say something...anything" he whispered, his voice thick with desire.
"Go.."
He felt his stomach flip, "What?"
She grinned, "Go. We need to go" she laughed, "unless you want everyone here to have a show" she quickly placed a kiss on his lips, "I want you so bad right now"
Adam laugh as he stood, he extended his hand to her and helped her up, pulling her flush against his chest, "I need to talk to him...,
"Adam, don't. Please?" Kim begged him, holding his hand in hers, "He's not worth it, and he's no longer at the 21st"
"I'll be fine. I promise, I need to talk to him" Adam kissed her forehead, before he headed towards the bar.
He stood beside him, "Roman" his tone firm and cold.
Sean looked out the corner of his eye, "Ruzek"
Adam rested his elbows on the bar, "You've got some fucking pair, you know that? You called yourself her friend and you put doubts in her head. Come up with these silly games? Out of respect for my fiancé I won't kick your ass"
"Oh, what a fucking prince" Sean spat, "everyone knows you're a fuck up who will break her heart, I was just hoping to save her some of that heartbreak"
Adam took a deep breath, he wasn't going to be baited into a fist fight, "You know what? You aren't worth it. The only one I need to prove myself to is Kim, and that's exactly what I plan on doing" he gripped the back of Sean's neck, "stay the fuck away from Kim or I will kick your ass" he shoved him down, his head nearly bouncing off the bar.
"Fuck you Ruzek" Sean shouted, his words falling on deaf ears.
THE NEXT DAY
The smile on her face felt as if it would never leave, she stared at his sleeping body, his hands splayed across his bare chest.
The white gold band on his left hand made her heart swell, she ran her finger across the cool gold, "Adam.." She whispered against his neck as she peppered him with soft kisses, "you've slept long enough"
Adam shifted in his sleep, a grunt escaping his lips, she upped her game and moved to the spot behind his ear that she knew drove him crazy, she could hear him grown softly, "Well, good morning to you too, " he flipped her on her back, "you're beautiful" he told her before crashing his lips against her's.
FIVE MONTHS LATER
"That's awesome" Erin grinned, pleased for her friends, "you need to tell me his reaction"
Kim laughed and put the gift bag away, "I will"
Adam was on the back deck, he had blown her away when he suggested just buying a house, he had already found one.
It had been in foreclosure and needed work but he was handy enough to do it all on his own.
He was going over the blueprint when she joined him at the table, "Hey baby, I've missed you. You have a good time with Lindsay?" He sat back in the chair taking a pill from his beer.
Kim grinned, "I did" she looked over his shoulder, "what's that?"
He glanced at the blueprint, "thinking about extending the back of the house, maybe add more to the living room" he pulled her down into his lap, "what'cha buy?" He tried to look into the bag she held, "is it for me?"
"Sort of"
He smiled, "will you model it for me?"
She laughed, "you're a mess, you know that" she played with the tiny hairs at the nape of his neck, "it's a little small for me"
He kissed her neck, "Small works, I like small" he teased her, "means I get to see more of you.."
She swatted at him and leaned back from his embrace, "You're a dirty man Adam Ruzek" she put the bag on the table, "open it"
"Don't try and act all innocent Kim, you're just as dirty." Last night still fresh in his mind, "what's it for, I didn't miss some holiday or something, did I?"
"Nope" she fought with the tears building in her eyes, "just open it Adam" she was dying from the anticipation.
He lifted the tissue paper from the bag and pulled out a small onesie, "Kim?" He wasn't sure what it meant, he read it 'If you think I'm cute you should see my daddy' it read in big baby blue lettering, "are you...Kim?" His ability to think coherently seeming to have left him, his mouth agape.
She covered her mouth with her hand, "I am" tears spilling from her eyes, "you ready for that mini-van"
He set the onesie on the table and pulled her face closer to his and kissed her, after a few minutes they parted.
"Holy fucking shit, I'm gonna be a dad" his hand on her stomach, "when? How?" He realized the absurdity of his question, "Well, I know how" he laughed, "but, how far along are you?"
"Almost, four months" she had barely any symptoms an her period was never very regular that she didn't think much of if when she had missed her period a few months. Only to find out at her yearly gynecology appointment that she was pregnant it nearly knocked her over but she'd never been happier.
"You're happy, right?"
"Thrilled" Adam beamed, "forget this" he pushed the blueprints aside, "I need to work on the nursery, my kid is gonna have the best nursery ever" he laughed, kissing Kim once more, "I love you, so much" his hand caressing her stomach, "and this baby"
SIX MONTHS LATER
Half of the intelligence unit filled the hospital's waiting room, Trudy Platt the Mose impatient of them all.
"Of course a Burgess-Ruzek kid would take its sweet ass time coming into this world, a whole lot of hurry up and wait with this one, huh?" She complained, Kim had been in labor for nearly thirty hours and she was starting to worry. Though no way in hell would she admit that to anyone.
Erin grabbed her hand, "Sarge, calm down. I'm sure everything is fine, the baby must take after Adam, late to everything"
"Adam, go get them" Kim whispered, cradling the sleeping newborn in her arms.
"You sure?" He asked, "they're all here"
"I know, just go get them. I'm sure they're driving the staff crazy. Especially Platt" she ran her fingers through the baby's soft brown hair, amazed at the amount of it. It already resembled Adam's crazy locks.
Hair with a mind of its own.
"Don't tell them yet" Kim smiled.
They had waited to find out the gender of the baby as much as it had killed Adam, he wanted to know but was willing to be surprised for Kim's sake.
She had talked about not many things in life ended up being a surprise and she wanted this to be their surprise.
"Here comes Ruzek" Kevin announced from the vending machine, "we got a little homie yet?"
Adam was grinning from ear to ear, "We do, come on back" he waved to the crowd.
"Well.." Platt asked her hands held up in front of it, "tell me it's a girl, please tell me it's a girl"
Adam laughed, "you'll just have to wait"
He pushed the door open, "Ready or not here they come" he laughed as they all filed in, each kissing Kim on the cheek, "Daddy's back baby" he lifted the infant from Kim's arms, "you're the sweetest baby ever" he whispered as he leaned down and placed a kiss on the baby's cheek. Earning a grunt from the baby, "Well, Kim should we tell 'em"
Kim smiled as Adam sat beside her on the bed, her eyes never leaving her sleeping son, "Meet Adam Kevin Ruzek" her eyes tearing up as she introduced her son to some of the most important people in her life.
Kevin stood frozen in place, "Come again.."
Adam brought little Adam to his best friend, "Meet your Uncle Kevin, Adam. He's kicked my ass a few times but he'll be the best uncle you could ever ask for"
Kevin took the infant from Adam, "You gave him my name?"
Kim wiped her tears away, "Kevin, you're family. I love you and I wanted to give my son a name he could be proud of"
"Kev, you crying?" Jay asked, Erin securely in his arms, "I'm pretty sure you are"
"Nah, man. It's allergies, a lot of dust or something in this place" he laughed, startling the infant in his arms, resulting in a scream.
Little Adam's face a bright red as he cried, his little hands balled into fists, "Uh, somebody needs to take him"
Adam grabbed his son and handed him to Kim, "I think someone's hungry"
LATER THAT NIGHT
"You're happy, right?" Kim asked, exhausted from the events of the past day and a half, "because I am, I didn't think I'd ever be this happy"
Adam smiled, still cradling his son, finding it impossible to put him down.
"Baby, I'm happy. This has been the best day of my life, I've got a beautiful wife and this amazing little boy." He reached up a swiped a few tears away, "Thank you for calling our engagement off" he laughed, pleased he could laugh at the memory.
"Umm, okay.."
"I needed it. I needed a kick in the ass, I needed to know what I was giving up by being and ass" he explained, "I don't even remember what I was afraid of"
"I love you Adam" Kim smiled, "and I love our son"
"Our son" Adam loved hearing those words, "most beautiful thing I've ever heard, I love you too"