Long may you run (part 2)

Emotions are exhausting, Tony decides at the end of the long conversation. Telling someone those things is more difficult than dealing with them yourself, he discovers. Trying to imagine an opposite situation – with Pepper telling him she has no more than two years to live – makes Tony understand why she's tearing up so much.

It feels so terribly cruel, but this time there's nothing Tony could do to make the situation easier. It's difficult not to feel guilty. It's easier not to act guilty. Tony's been perfecting his acting for months.

On Saturday Nate goes to Riverside. When he steps into the building, there is a crowd of kids waiting for him, as if he was some kind of a superstar – in a way completely different than Tony Stark.

It's summer holiday already, but the kids, contrary to must children, aren't that happy and they seem eager to attend summer classes that their school offer.

'We simply aren't able to provide them with a lot of diverse activities and fun,' Miles explains, leading Tony and the kids to the backyard. The weather is lovely, warm but with scattered clouds making the sunshine soft; not spending time outside would be a waste. 'They have the possibility of spending time with people other than our mini-community here, too. It's important. Those kids tend to stick to themselves a lot.'

Tony nods and follows the group outside. He can understand that very well.

They spend the rest of the afternoon playing outside. Tony learns that making a giant painting with the use of feet and hands is a game that appeals to everyone, from the youngest to the oldest, and cleaning in an inflatable swimming pool is even more fun.

It feels new. When Tony was fourteen, he was already attending MIT and it never even crossed his mind to paint things with his feet – and now, when he's over forty posing as almost forty, he finds out he's been missing out a lot.

The game ends when time for dinner comes. Annik invites Nate to stay and he agrees, mostly because he still needs to talk to Marcel about the boy's request from last week.

Tony didn't realize it was so late: it's hard not to count hours obsessively when you have constant deadlines but for once Tony managed to forget about everything. It's a great feeling.

There's chicken and a salad for dinner, simple but very tasty, and ice cream for dessert. Afterwards all the kids disappear into their rooms or their hiding places in the backyard and Nate is left alone with Marcel. Tony cleared the lesson with Miles, who confirmed that the boy indeed has really good grades in sciences.

'How bout u show me what u do school,' Tony types and Marcel immediately smiles at the symbols. Older people get annoyed when Tony writes this way, but hey, it's efficient.

'Here's my notebook. And my textbook,' the boy slides them across the table and sits cross-legged on his chair.

The school stuff is, well, dull. Tony has always though so, even back when he was at school himself, and most of the time the lessons are boring and theoretical.

'Look at the other end,' Marcel prompts, tapping his fingers on the table. 'It's from the Physics club.'

Tony does look and it's a big change at the first glance; not only is the material more advanced, but there are notes from experiments and a lot of observations written down in Marcel's neat handwriting, data for homework and assignments, it seems.

'That all u have 2 show 2 me?' Tony types and looks at the boy challengingly. Marcel smirks and gets another notebook, bigger and thicker, out of a bag that's on the floor at his feet. 'This is?'

'Some things I've been teaching myself.'

Tony takes the notebook and flips page after page, looking through the equations and the notes, the subjects Marcel's been studying and the results of his work, and after a few minutes of silence he leaves the notebook open on one of the pages, tracing the rough paper with his fingers. The things inside are advanced, but Tony can tell Marcel is waiting for more challenges.

'So u like Physics.'

'Yeah –'

'& u asked me for help.'

'You seemed like someone who can do more than type codes?' Marcel half-says, half-asks. He's a weird mixture of cocky and self-conscious and he is clever. Tony likes him even more now. 'I don't know who else I can ask… We don't have money for special summer classes. And with scholarships, you know how it is,' he adds, suddenly taking interest in his hands.

Tony doesn't know how it is with scholarships, he's never received one; there were many options, but he really didn't need the money and he preferred someone else who needed it to have it. Howard approved, it was good for the press.

Nate never got a single one.

'How about I quiz u?'

'Yeah, okay,' Marcel agrees and leans over the table. 'Come on.'

Tony laughs soundlessly – it's something that Nate has been doing recently and it's more expressive than Tony Stark ever was.

It takes half an hour and Marcel does really good; it's so coincidental that it's funny, finding such a jewel by accident. The boy, if taught by smart and observant people, could be amazing.

'U want to study -?'

'I like lots of things, but – but I think Physics is my favorite.'

'Ok,' Tony types and then he has this brilliant idea. 'U know, sb will teach u, I make sure. Need 2 do sth first. Tell u for sure nxt week, k?'

'Yeah, sure,' Marcel agrees, suddenly not meeting Tony's eyes, and Tony gets it. He knocks at the table and makes a loud sound to draw the boys attention.

'I make sure u have sb 2 to take care of you, right? I WILL. not leaving u now,' Tony types quickly. The tablet's surface feels sticky under Tony's fingers. Marcel reads the words three or four times, looks at Tony, and grins.

'Thanks,' the boy says.

Tony goes back to his workshop instead of going home; Happy is out for the day and Doc is out for the week, so Tony is finally free to do some more work without his babysitters leaning over his shoulder.

'Get me a pizza delivered here, J, in two hours. Remind me a few minutes before. And give me some tunes –'

'I'm afraid you have a phone call, sir – Iron Man has. It's Captain Rogers.'

'Right now?'

'Yes, sir.'

'Well, skip the tunes and patch him through,' Tony says, getting himself a bottle of cold orange juice from the mini-fridge.

'This place is really good,' Steve's excited voice fills the room. Tony smirks around his cup. 'We got a close look at every corner and this is really good, we'll have enough space for everything I wanted and some more, and it'll need less renovating that I was afraid it would.'

'Task-focused, I see,' Tony comments drily, though it's lost in Iron Man's voice.

'It's good to have something to focus on,' Steve replies sheepishly; Tony can imagine the exact face the man must be making right now.

'You alone there?'

'Nat and Clint left… maybe an hour ago?'

'Then why are you staying?' Tony asks, throwing the empty juice bottle into a bin with perfect aim and slumping in his armchair. There is a moment of silence and when Steve speaks up, he sounds slightly embarrassed. It's cute.

'Thought I could, you know, check the place out in practice.'

Tony raises his eyebrows, gesturing at JARVIS to put up his latest saved files on the screen.

'You're sleeping there?'

'Yeah –'

'Don't want to be in your S.H.I.E.L.D. room more than necessary?'

'You got me,' Steve laughs drily. 'The atmosphere there is still pretty morbid, though it's nice to see Natasha and Clint behaving more normally finally, and they'll be calmer since Phil's gonna be okay…'

For a moment, Tony thinks about proposing to come over because Steve staying all alone in the huge dusty house sound pretty damn miserable – but Tony is really behind with his work because of all the hours he's been spending out in the streets and with S.H.I.E.L.D. There are a few things that just can't wait.

'You've got the sense of adventure,' he says in the end, smirking to himself and biting his tongue before he can add were you a Boy Scout back in 40s? Still not an Iron Man thing to say.

'I've been cooped up in the HQ room for much too long. Even back in my days, we'd go out and walk the city streets at night every few days.'

And get beat up, at least you, Tony thinks, but says nothing.

He's got an idea.

'Well, I just wanted to let you know everything went fine here with me and the others. I knew you were worrying about them.'

'Thank you for the call.'

'Bye, Iron Man,' Steve says and hangs up.

Tony looks up at the ceiling.

'Send an extra-large sausage, cheese-stuffed crust, to where Steve's saying. Pre-pay.'

'As you wish, sir,' JARVIS replies promptly and turns on Tony's music. There is a schematic for an arc reactor on the screen, and a few other less important projects, and a half-finished code for one of Nate's jobs that Tony decides to start with.

During the week the Avengers still help out with clean-up, but the hours are shorter. Tony gets home after lunch and goes to the workshop to do the overdue work, continuing his daily routine, and everything seems perfectly boring – right until Nate gets a message from Fury.

'They're asking me if I would like to work with their specialists on creating a security system for the new Avengers Headquarters,' he explains to Happy before dinner. Happy doesn't seem to notice what the problem is.

'So?'

'So, Nate was never supposed to be out in the world that much, maybe?' Tony answers with a question, slightly irritated. Okay. More like nervous.

'You're worried you won't be able to keep the act up?'

'Not at all,' he scoffs, sitting by the table and helping himself with the food. 'Sit down, Happy. Don't loom over me – well, don't you think it could be a problem that Nate would have to come to the HQ pretty often and plan everything with the team, which means Iron Man really should be there? And he won't? If it happens too many times, someone's gonna notice something is off about the situation. Really. Don't you have any imagination?'

'I have plenty imagination,' Happy grumbles, glaring at Tony. 'Why would you need to discuss it with the team?'

'I don't think they'll agree to anything less, come on, I'm on it and –'

'It's their safety it's about, I know, boss, I do know a thing or two about security,' Happy cuts in with a small grin, glancing around the kitchen subtly. Tony knows he's mentally assessing all the safety precautions installed in the flat and upgraded before Nate Rives moved in. Work of art. 'Can't you send J in the suit?'

'JARVIS, all by himself?' Tony wonders, staring into the A.I.'s nearest camera. It does sound like a good idea and it could work since JARVIS is fully sentient, but Tony knows something Happy – or anyone else for that matter – doesn't know. 'He wouldn't want to,' Tony states.

JARVIS stays silent, but Tony knows perfectly that the A.I. is somehow relieved.

'He wouldn't want to,' Tony repeats; Happy doesn't question that statement, he knows better than that. JARVIS is fully sentient and all the jazz, but Tony knows that he'd be very uncomfortable given that much freedom, JARVIS is always worried about the level of independence Tony gives him. They've had that discussion countless times, but JARVIS insists he should be under Tony's orders and protocols, especially around other people. And being in the same room without the ability to communicate freely would make that impossible.

'You'll think of something, boss – you could always claim Nate is anti-social. He almost is, you know.'

'Don't you start with that again,' Tony says in a warning tone. Happy rolls his eyes. 'No, really – you don't get to call me a recluse now that I have Pepper and Rhodey. I ever visited Mrs. Linz last week and you know it. I'm fine with how things are. I'm not talking about that again.'

'You just were –'

'Oh, shut up,' Tony sighs, wrapping his spaghetti around the fork skillfully. 'I still need to contact Bruce – Nate does.'

'Yeah, good luck with that,' Happy says. Tony glares. That just has to work out somehow.

Nate does send Bruce a message, asking if the man would have a moment on Thursday afternoon to meet for a coffee. Bruce doesn't write back until midday, but in the end he says yes. Nate comes to the man's lab at four; Bruce is not helping out in the streets anymore. He did some work at the beginning, but without the Hulk he doesn't possess any extra strength so he's more needed in the labs.

'Thanks for agreeing,' Nate types for Bruce as he enters the lab.

'I must say I am curious as to why you wanted a meeting,' Bruce admits, finishes typing something on his laptop and closes it. 'You asked if I had time on Saturday?'

'I know you don't like going out to people too much, but I've got this favor to ask.'

'A favor?' Bruce cocks his head and frowns slightly. He's intrigued. Good.

'I know someone who could use your help,' Tony types and Bruce look at him sharply.

'My help?'

'You know how being a very smart person without a proper guidance can end up,' Tony types, turns the tablet around even though Bruce can read upside-down, and stares. Bruce stares back, keeping silent for a long moment, and then nods sharply.

'Tell me what this is about.'

'There's a boy I know, Marcel, he's 15 and an orphan…' Tony starts typing, quickly explaining the whole situation. Bruce would do better than Nate at teaching Marcel, Tony is sure. The boy's fascinated with Bruce's area of expertise and while Tony Stark would know enough to teach, Nate doesn't.

He could, if Bruce didn't agree, because Marcel doesn't deserve being left alone, but Tony can tell from the spark in Bruce's eyes that the man is hooked. There are too many similarities between the boy and a lot of people around Bruce to ignore.

Tony shows Bruce some of the boy's notes and things he's been working on, and Bruce's curiosity only grows until he's itching to see Marcel by himself. It's endearing to watch. Bruce is usually very wary about being out with civilians and hardly ever spends more time than absolutely necessary outside of S.H.I.E.L.D. or the Avengers' company so that'll be good for both of them.

'We were supposed to get coffee,' Tony types at some point. They're still in the lab. Bruce blinks and looks around, as if he forgot where he was.

'How about we get some, there's this place a few blocks away, and you tell me how you met Marcel?'

'That'd do,' Nate agrees and walks out of the room, Bruce close behind him.

Nate's activities are no secret, Tony would prefer the Avengers not to know about everything he does in his free time. Marcel is worth revealing some secrets, though.

The secrets will have to be revealed at some point, anyway, hopefully far in the future.

At least some of them.

On Saturday Nate takes Bruce to the Riverside – after talking about the situation with Miles – and leaves him with Marcel while he plays with the kids. The weather is a bit rainy, so most of the games take place inside today.

After three hours, when Bruce finally emerges from the upstairs, with grinning Marcel at his side, Tony is pretty exhausted. Spending time with the kids is amazing, but it depletes Tony's energy levels quickly; he's been working pretty long hours recently so the two things combined leave him dreaming about spending the rest of the day on the bed, watching movies or conversing with JARVIS about whatever comes to his mind. Just – rest.

Especially that Scott is coming over the next week and Tony knows he's not in his best condition. Scott will notice that straight away. Tony would prefer if the man visited another time, a few weeks later, but Scott's been conspiring with Pepper behind Tony's back and there is no force that can stop those two .

'We'll be meeting three times a week, at least during holidays, unless duty calls the Avengers,' Bruce explains Tony when they're driving to new HQ. Tony didn't know Bruce drove; it makes sense though, given that the alternatives are either too expensive for a doctor on a run – or too dangerous for everyone involved, when it comes to public transpiration. 'You're a lucky man, to find someone like him, and he's even more lucky to have somebody who cares enough to make effort to help him.'

'Had to,' Tony types, not offering an further explanation, but Bruce doesn't ask. 'Who with Agent Coulson?'

'Fury is staying with him right now, so that Clint and Natasha could have some time off. They really don't have to be there all the time, but try to stop them – you can't. They'll get away from that place, at least.'

'You worry about them.'

Bruce reads the words and chuckles with amusement.

'I think I worry about everyone, you included. That's just the kind of person I am.'

'Hulk?'

'That, too, but we've reached an understanding of sorts recently. He's calmer, so I don't – I'm not worried about him attacking any of you. I've been a bit too close to some crazy things, though, and that leaves a man with a lot of anxiety. I can't be hurt, I can't get sick, but they can. You can. So.'

'That's what being around people does to you?'

'It's easy not to worry when you're alone. Harder when you have friends.'

'Got it,' Tony types, thinking about Pepper's visit, and hides the tablet in his bag. He recognizes the neighborhood: they'll be at the new HQ any minute now. Nate has agreed for a meeting while Iron Man couldn't come – he hasn't been around for two days before, to make it look less suspicious. Tony will probably try to play it with as few face-to-face meetings with everyone as possible – and as much of consultation via email as they'll agree to.

There hasn't been any team-talk before the meeting, Clint and Steve said they have a very good idea and will share it when they meet with Nate. So Tony isn't prepared at all for what Clint says, as soon as they are seated around a table in an otherwise empty room, surrounded by the scent of fresh paint.

'I know you write programs for medical A.I.s and that you're damn smart, man,' Clint says with a grin. Tony raises and eyebrow. 'We thought maybe you could write us a program that would take care of the security.'

Tony blinks a few times, looking between Clint and Steve, and adjusted his glasses; he's been doing that recently, the habit finally taking over ruffling his now non-existent hair.

'A.I.?'

'Yeah. That'd be pretty cool if it could control all the cameras and sensors we'd install and do all the jobs for us – I'd rather trust an A.I. than a man.'

Tony looks at Steve questioningly, he hasn't expected Cap to be the one to come forward with such an idea. Steve shrugs slightly and lets an amused smile on his lips.

'I grew up on early science-fiction books,' he says, as if it explained everything. Tony nods in understanding – it does explain a lot – and looks back at the tablet.

'You don't call an A.I. it,' he types with serious face. He wishes he could say that out loud in a firm tone. 'I write them with enough personality to identify with their name.'

'We'd want a he, then,' Natasha says before everyone else can speak up. All heads turn towards her instantly. 'Less moody, if we're thinking that way – does that mean you can do that?'

Clint snorts lightly, but stops when Natasha gives him a stern look. Those two are impossible.

'It'll take time,' Tony types, wondering how the hell is he supposed to squeeze writing an A.I. code in his schedule; it might not be very full, but it's as much as Tony can manage and as much as he's allowed to do.

But – ah. That's a good idea.

'And you'll need a lot of wire.'

Clint flashes him a grin, sending a text to Phil straight away, and the rest of them seems satisfied.

'I've got work for you, J,' Tony calls as soon as he's back at home, finally. Spending an hour with his team – people who don't realize that they are his team – might be lovely, but that's not enough when you develop a nasty headache.

'Yes, sir?'

'I want you to do something for me – you've heard what we talked with the team,' Tony says, taking off his slightly wet clothes. The new HQ house is old and doesn't have any security devices providing sound feed that JARVIS could hack, so Tony took one of his mini portable mics with himself so that JARVIS would have all the data he needs.

'Do you want me to write the new code and create and A.I. based on all I know about the other A.I.s that you've built, sir?'

'Yes, J. Bright boy, as always.'

'I was afraid you'd say so,' the A.I. sounds a bit resigned, but his voice is warm and amused, too. 'Why, sir?'

'They need it at the HQ –'

'You could have asked me to do that a long time ago. I could have written all of the codes you did within last five years, I was developed enough.'

Tony takes off the glasses and wraps a bathrobe he left on the sofa in the morning around his thin body. He sighs and stays silent, giving JARVIS time to figure it out by himself. JARVIS is the best at finding information, hacking, controlling, but Tony's still teaching him how to understand people all on his own.

'You want me to make that A.I. – they wanted a male – that would be an extension of myself.'

'Right, go on,' Tony encourages JARVIS to talk as he walks to the kitchen to grab himself something to drink.

'You want me to be around other people.'

'Uh-oh.'

'So that I would make friends outside of this place. Because of what we've talked about once, that I'll be left all alone when you're gone, without a purpose.'

'Yes, J. You got me,' Tony flashes a dashing smile at the camera over the table.

'That's –'

'You don't have to do it, J,' he cuts in sharply. When he exhales, it feels as if all his limbs suddenly got so heavy. 'I want you to be happy, okay?'

'But without you –'

'You have to learn,' Tony interrupts again, pouring the water JARVIS boiled for him over a teaspoon of green tea leaves, 'that I'm not everything you have. There's Pepper and Rhodey and Happy, and I know they treat you like a person you are, but they don't really need you, not the way I do. They're colleagues more than friends, more than a family. I – we – we've got pretty much time, still, to find you a place to be where you'd be good.'

'You want them to adopt me, sir?' JARVIS asks, his voice quiet and soft, making Tony's gut hurt with guilt.

'I think that could be a good option, yes,' Tony admits, wishing he did insist on creating a body for J all those years ago so that he could hug the A.I. now. 'I'm sorry –'

'That's quite all right, sir,' JARVIS says a bit more fiercely. 'Will I ever be able to tell them who I am, really, if we proceed with the plan?'

'Yes,' Tony replies quickly. 'But I know you are you really asking me if I'm ever going to tell them that Iron Man and Nate Rives and Tony Stark are the same person, or at least two of them, right? I – I don't know. I don't even think about it right now. Let's – let's not think about it,' Tony adds, massaging his temples with his thumbs, the lemony scent of the tea soothing the headache slightly.

'I hope you will trust them enough to tell them, at some point, sir,' JARVIS says before going silent.

Tony isn't sure he thinks the same. Not thinking about it is much easier than trying to come up with a situation that he'd call comfortable.

Next week the team is no longer working in the streets, all the clean-up now is left to the local authorities to manage, so the focus is work on details regarding the HQ. Everyone has some ideas by now, they just has to sit down and put everything together before Nate can start making the project of the installation he'll need for the A.I.

On Friday afternoon the Avengers all meet in the building – it's cleaned of all S.H.I.E.L.D. things now, with the walls painted white and the wooden floors scraped by the cleaning team Fury found for them. Tony knows that Steve has already, albeit unofficially, chosen his room. No one comments on that, but everyone knows it's the one he's been sleeping in since last Saturday.

'When it comes to the training rooms, I think we'll need a gym, a range and one big training space that could be adapted do what we'll need,' Steve starts, pointing at the building's plans in front of him.

'Swimming pool?' Tony suggests, eyeing Clint, who offers him a tense smile. Tony knows that swimming is one of the nice light activities that will play a big part in Phil's recovery. Tony himself doesn't swim, as long as anyone can see him – the reactor is conspicuous so it would be impossible as long as Tony is keeping up his secret identities.

'Good idea – there's an old conference room in the back, ground level, it should be good to use…' Steve muses, gesturing at everyone to have a look, and so they continue the discussion or some time.

Right until Spider Man speaks up, stopping the argument on whether there should be a lading pad for Quinjet on the outside or somewhere inside the building.

'We need a kitchen, too,' he says and everyone stares at him. 'What? I'm not gonna eat take-outs for the rest of the long hours I'm gonna spend here. Bruce can cook.'

'Sure, Bruce can cook,' Bruce repeats the words mockingly, but he's not as annoyed as he pretends to be.

'I can cook, too,' Natasha offers, and every head except for Clint's, turns towards her now. It's pretty amusing, like a ping-ping match. 'I know maybe you wouldn't expect, but yes, I can cook. Pretty well.'

'You'll love her pierogi,' Clint adds, nodding to himself and ignoring Natasha's stare. 'And Thai and classical French. She's got a variety of repertoire.'

'Of course I have,' Natasha scoffs, folding her arms, and Clint does the same.

Tony smirks under the helmet; it's good to see them being more like the Natasha and Clint that Iron Man and Nate met before the Chitauri invasion.

'Well, that was a clue to get some food that no one got,' Spider Man adds, sounding remotely disappointed. He's a great actor, Tony knows, almost as good as himself. 'Starving here?'

'I called for pizza,' Tony says, looking at Steve who smiles lopsidedly. Tony's been sending him a courier with some pizza every evening since that Saturday. Steve never said a word and neither did Tony, but they don't have to. 'Should be here in fifteen minutes.'

'Let me know I equally appreciate your foresight and I admire how you choose to starve,' Spider Man comments, shaking his head with disbelief.

Tony rolls his eyes, even though no one can see him, and sighs. He's explained many times that he doesn't have to eat when they do, but Clint and Spider Man still like to joke about that, if only to annoy him.

'Well, we will need the kitchen to be close to our strategy room,' Bruce says and there's a second of silence before everyone burst out laughing.

July 1st is Sunday, so a team meeting is connected with the monthly training – they decided have them as scheduled, despite the many meeting they had recently. The team handler for now, as long as Phil is recovering, is Fury himself, and he said he'd like to see the Avengers being themselves.

The day passes quickly and before Tony knows, he's back at home changing into running clothes. He wants to go for a run while he still can – the next round of radiation is starting tomorrow, so he probably won't be able to force himself to go out running – and Scott is arriving today evening. Tony is supposed to pick him up from the airport at seven; the man will only stay for three days.

When Tony's running the time passes quickly and nicely, he doesn't feel the miles in his body – used to regular training despite the illness. When he's back at home, though, standing under a thick stream of lukewarm water, he feels strangely faint.

'Sir, your heart is beating too fast,' JARVIS informs him when Tony leans against the cold glass to calm down his body. 'Are you all right?'

'Just tired, J,' Tony replies. It's a bit too hard to breathe for his liking. That's – that surely isn't anything bad, he tells himself, but he could meet with Doc sometime soon, outside of the schedule, just to be sure. 'Make the water a bit colder and get rid of the steam,' he adds, taking a few deep long breaths.

He's just tired.

A/N: Thank you so much for all your amazing comments! I'm very happy to know that you've been waiting and still wanted to read this story after all this time. I wasn't sure you'd still be interested.

I'm pretty anxious about this chapter. Well, about this whole part of the series - it's a difficult story to write. I hope you are enjoying yourselves here. All comments are appreciated and loved, as always :)