Ready Set Breathe (A Steve Rogers Destruction Story)

by BlitheBells

Steve Rogers' destruction story. Sequel to Run. COMPLETED. Second book in the three part 'Run' series. First title is 'Run' and third is 'To Go Unseen'. Also found on AO3 and Wattpad Rated for some violence WARNING Before you begin this story, I would like to warn you that topics like suicide, depression and self-harm are discussed explicitly and at length.

72. 61 Loved

61 Loved

Natasha was there the next day when Steve realized that he had actually come a long way from wanting to die.

"Everything's been hectic," Natasha said and she wrapped her arms around Steve and hugged him once he let her in. "I've missed you!"

"You have?" Steve said and Natasha smiled at him.

"Of course, Rogers," she said teasingly. And there was a difference, Steve found, between people telling you they love you and showing you they loved you and one, he had a hard time believing, but the other… It meant something to him and it was starting to make living worth it.

Maybe there's also a difference between knowing that you're loved and feeling that you're loved. Maybe Bucky was right. Maybe 'burden' wasn't the right word to describe how he felt anymore.

"How do you do it?" Steve asked as Natasha pulled away from him and she looked at him with an eyebrow raised as she crossed him to drop onto his couch.

"Do what?" She asked and Steve raised his hands.

"This," he said. "Me, and Bucky." Natasha looked down and she seemed to understand what he meant, that her patience kept them both from falling apart and her strength to bounce back and forth between them was impressive. "Anyone else would have given up. I'm a mess, Buck can't even speak English sometimes..." Natasha rolled her eyes and laughed a little as she kicked back on his couch but then when she looked at him, her eyes were sombering. She took in a breath and Steve stood there and waited for her response.

"When you love someone," Natasha said and she shifted on the couch, putting her arms behind her head. "You'd go to the ends of the Earth." She looked up and her eyes met Steve's. "And if that means staying up every night with James when he's scared, I'll do it and if that means pulling you out of death traps every day," Natasha laughed and Steve put his hands into his pockets and looked away, but he smiled a little. "I'll do that, too. That's what friends do for each other."

And that's what Natasha had done for Steve, what Bucky had done for Steve, and what Steve would do for either of them. And Steve was slowly beginning to see the happiness. It was hard, and it would take even longer for him to be happy, but he felt loved. And that was worth it.

Because sometimes, the choice to live is simply the choice not to die. But it's getting there. It's getting there.