The saddle felt light in her arms as she flung it over her horse's broad back. She tightened the straps with practiced ease and set to work on the bridle.

The months been long as The Commander had waited for her riders to return with news of the Clan's reaction to the Coalition. To her surprise 8 of the clans had agreed to meet in Polis at the Summer Solstice, which was still some time away. The great length between meetings was due to the fact that Lexa now had to ride to those clans that didn't not respond well to her will. The Ice Nation going as far as to return only the head of her rider. A warning Lexa was taking gravely. They would visit the Azgeda last; only after all other clans had agreed to meet. Only then would she have enough leverage to convince Nia to shrink her large arrogant head.

Once Lexa's horse was ready she turned to watch those around her. An infantry of 50 of her most trusted warriors were accompanying her on the tour to the clans, with them they were bringing several tradesmen and hunters bring their number close to 75. A large group to travel the open wilderness but they were safer in numbers and Lexa swore she would not fall victim to one of Nia's attacks once more.

As she watched the soldiers ready themselves a flash of red hair caught her eye. No. She thought striding across to where the healer's were packing their cart.

At her approach the other healer's bowed their heads and backed away our of earshot.

"What are you doing?" She demanded quietly of Costia who wore a traveling cloak and was packing a basket of herbs.

The healer was confused. "What do you mean what am I doing? I am readying the cart for the trip."

"That you are not coming on." Lexa said lowly.

Costia narrowed her eyes at the Commander. "Heda." Lexa flinched slightly at having her be addressed so formally. "I am your healer. Your health is my responsibility. How am I to care for you if I remain here? As well I am the best healer in Polis. You will want me."

Lexa felt regret bubble within her stomach, Costia had tricked her. She had known Lexa would never allow her to come, the very reason Lexa had never mentioned it to the girl. She had just assumed Costia had understood that it was for her own safety to remain in Polis. Yet here the girl stood preparing to leave, surrounded by other healers. Lexa could not speak her mind here. Costia knew this for all she had said would seem reasonable to any who did not know what Lexa and Costia were.

"Heda? Are you prepared to leave?" Gustus approached the two hesitantly sensing the conflict at hand.

Lexa glared at Costia before addressing her guard. "Yes. It is time to depart." With one last dirty look at Costia Lexa strode to her horse and mounted it.

"Sound the horn." Lexa said kicking her horse and trotting down the street. Gustus blew loudly on a small horn that emitted a low rumbling sound. The warriors mounted their steads and began to ride while those on foot began to stride down the streets of Polis.
Feeling a twinge of regret Costia took the hand of a fellow healer and was helped into their carriage. She was upset that Lexa was displeased but she knew deep in her heart that this was where she needed to be.

XXXXX

The rain was just beginning to fall as Lexa pushed back the flap of her tent. Though it was only a travel tent it still felt like home after the last two weeks of riding.

She had seen two clans in that time both of whom she had convinced to attend the Solstice to discuss to coalition. She had been surprised how easy it had been to convince the Marsh Clan who had been fairly violent within the last few years but at looking at their living conditions Lexa could not entirely blame them. Their villages had recently flooded and they had been forced to build their houses on large wooden posts above the swampy ground. They were also suffering greatly from a clan of great bears who would very difficult to track and kill. They needed the Coalition. This gave Lexa hope.

The Clan that mainly lived within the caves proved to be very challenging to convince. They had always been a peculiar clan who spent most of their days below ground, something Lexa had never truly understood. However, most of the minerals and metals used to make armor came from their mines so their involvement in the Coalition was vital. Their head of government was a large brute that had been too close to too many explosions. He was hard of hearing and Lexa hadn't liked yelling at him, it made her seem aggressive, but after much debate and a few clashes of weapons they agreed to attend the Solstice.

Lexa sat on her bed exhausted. The rain was beginning to patter more heavily on her tent's roof. Perhaps she thought hopefully, the rain would help her sleep. With the amount of traveling the Commander had been doing and the stress of her task had been keeping her awake at night. She hadn't had more than an hour or two of sleep a night since they'd left. There were nights that Lexa watched the sun set only to see the sun rise once more.

She had not seen Costia once since they had left Polis. The Healer had been with her fellows, they were using their time on the road to collect herbs that did not grow near Polis. It also enforced Costia's status as merely a healer. Lexa had not enjoyed how they parted ways arguing. But what was she to do. She could not go seeking the Healer without proper cause.

With a sigh Lexa removed her breastplate and lay back on her bed. It was going to be another sleepless night she thought dismally as she felt her body prickle with restlessness. Resolutely she got out of bed and crossed to the small table bearing her maps. They would remain in this camp for another day to rest the horses before heading to the edge of the Dead Zone to speak with the Desert Clan. From there they would head North to Azgeda. Lexa has intentionally left the Ice Nation to last knowing how difficult it would be to convince Nia to even consider the Coalition. She was the most powerful ruler apart from Lexa and did not like to play nicely. Lexa hoped that having the other 11 clans involved would sway the woman and if not, that the threat they then posed would convince. Either way it was not going to be a pleasant affair.

As Lexa stared at the Ice Nation's land she felt a ball of frustration grow deep within her. Why did this need to be so difficult? It was for the best, yet her people bucked with every step she took. In a sudden rage Lexa threw the great map to the ground.

"Heda?"

Without even turning Lexa knew whom it was. For no other would dare enter her tent without first asking permission.

"Costia." Lexa said stiffly, the rage within her still fiery. "What brings you here?"

The girl hesitated in the tent entrance for a moment before entering; back straight.

"Gustus sent me." She said with authority "He said that you have not been sleeping and wondered if there was something I could procure to aide you."

Lexa felt her body shaking with emotion, some rage, but also something else.

"Gustus has no business sending for you." She growled.

"He is simply concerned." Costia said titling her head slightly, examining the woman before her. "Are you?"

"Am I what." Lexa said hotly.

"Having trouble sleeping." Costia took a step towards her charge. "You are not looking your best Heda."

At her advance Lexa felt her shoulders push back, a defensive stance. Costia stopped moving for a moment.

"You need to look your strongest if you are to ask the clans to join you." Costia said deciding to take another step forward. Lexa glared at her.

"Why haven't you been sleeping Heda?" She said only a few feet from the other girl. Her hands crossed in front of her.

Lexa turned from the healer to face her table placing a hand on either corner to support her.

"I have no need for a Healer Costia." She said harshly. "Return to your tent where you are needed." She shut her eyes, willing herself to keep her emotions at bay.

"Lexa." Costia's soft voice whispered surprisingly close to her. She felt small hands on her shoulders.

Lexa turned swiftly ready to shout at the girl, but upon looking into her eyes she felt herself wilt. Costia's eyes shone slightly in the candlelight, as if tears were moments away.

"Costia. Return to the Healers." Lexa said feeling hoarse.

Costia shut her eyes at the command and instead placed her hands on the other girl's waist. "Please."

Lexa stood firm denying what she was feeling. Why? She could not entirely place.

" Please do not be angry with me." Costia said slowly wrapping her arms around the taller woman and placing her head on her shoulder. "I can't sleep Lexa."

Lexa felt her body sway and could not deny her body's instinctual response of leaning in the girl and placing her chin the girl's shoulder.

"I'm not angry." She said weakly wrapping her arms around the healer's back. "I'm afraid."

Costia released the embrace and stood back, her hands on Lexa's waist.

"Why?"

"Because I know its your duty to be here." Lexa said feeling all the suppressed emotions of the last two weeks bubbling up. "I'm afraid that you will get hurt. I'm afraid because knowing that I still want you here. I'm afraid because I can't sleep. I'm afraid because you've made me weak. I'm afraid of how much you mean to me." Lexa said her voice cracking.

"Lexa." Costia said pulling her into a kiss. It had been so long since their lips have touched that Lexa had almost forgotten what it was like. The relaxing wave that always washed over her was tsunami sized.
As the kiss ended Costia pressed her forehead against Lexa's.

"I'm afraid too." She confessed. "I'm afraid for you. I know what a Commander's life is like; I know how often they get killed. That's why I needed to come."

She said looking up into Lexa's eyes. "I was afraid that you'd die if I didn't. I'm afraid I'll never sleep again if something happens to you."

Lexa smiled thickly as she felt tears stream down her face. How could she have feared that this girl made her weak? When she felt so strong with her in her arms.

"Now." Costia said taking a step back wiping her eyes. "I still have a job to do here."

Lexa furrowed her brow confused.

"You need to sleep." Costia said taking Lexa's hand and leading her to the bed.

"Hypocrite." Lexa said allowing herself to be led.

Costia ignored the comment and pulled the furs of the bed back. She tugged at Lexa's hand for her to lie down. Lexa resisted.

"You need to return to the other healers. They will wonder where you went."

"They know where I've gone. To help you, if that takes all night so be it."

Lexa still stood firm. She could not have any in the camp knowing of Costia's true part in her life, not with so many enemies around them.

Costia realizing the Lexa was not going to move groaned exasperated and leaned into kiss the girl.

Lexa felt herself weaken as Costia's lips met hers. She knew what this game was but was in no power to resist for Costia's hands were now making their way along the back of her shirt and snaking up against her bare skin.

Lexa moaned slightly as tingles of pleasure shot up her spine, Costia deepened the kiss and began to forcefully press herself against Lexa's body. Lexa having to give into the pressure was forced to sit down. Within a moment Costia leaving against her, forcing her to lay down until she was on her back with the healer on top of her.

Costia went about kissing Lexa's neck until the girl began to moan softly. At the sound Costia stopped and rolled off the prey so that both woman now lay in bed.

"That was unfair." Lexa said breathlessly.

"There is no fair when it comes to healing." Costia laughed before blowing out the bedside candles and rolling into Lexa's body so that her head rested against Lexa's neck.

Feeling as though the puzzle had been complete Lexa wrapped her arms affectionately around the Healer and exhaled, releasing any remaining stress in her body. As sleep began to take them both Lexa felt a twinge of fear take her once more, and somehow she felt as though she'd never be rid of it.