The Beginning of the End
Therefore, it was unthinkable, even for himself at that time, to be so stubbornly contrary before the Master. When the Master flicked His wand and lifted him to the air, he thought that it was the end, for He had killed others for less.
"Are you a traitor, Severus?" the Master asked quietly. "Is this all Dumbledore's trap?"
"No! My Lord knows I am loyal to him."
"Yes... I know you believe that. But you show your disloyalty by favoring my enemies."
The Master's words caged him in as the cold red eyes pierced his. He knew what he had to do to be forgiven. He was still favored. He opened his mouth to apologize and condemn her.
"She is nothing, my Lord. She is not worthy of your notice. Please, my Lord, I beg you, let her -" With a harsh flick of the wand, he was silenced. The Master sighed sorrowfully. With a lazy wave of His wand, He flipped him over until he was dangling upside down. Dried mud and dust on his boots and pants, evidence of his rude ejection and hasty flight from Hogsmead, rained down onto his face and choked him, but he could not even blink to clear his eyes. The room and all his colleagues faded away, and his whole world was the two fiery pupils.
"I have to get the bad out of you, boy." He knew! He knew, He knew - "crucio."
"I have to get the bad out of you, boy." He was crying now. What was it exactly this time? He was shaken hard, and he thought his leg would rip into two. "You stop crying and don't wake Mother up."
Some loops of the rope around his ankle and he was dangling from the kitchen meat hook. He heard the dreaded whoosh and his body exploded. He screamed.
"You shut up now. I told you not to do it again. But you did it - shut up!" Father stopped. The butcher's knife appeared before his face. "You see this? You want me to stick you like a pig?" He stopped struggling when he felt the cold metal against his neck. "If you force me I'll have to do it. If that's the only way, I swear I'll open you up, let your wicked blood drain into the sewers. Then I'll chop you up and cook you for dinner."
He stopped crying. It was not through conscious effort; he was just too terrified to cry. He had seen how meat was chopped up. The image of him as the meat was as vivid in his mind as his experience. Even when the pain started again, he couldn't make a sound.
Please stop. He won't do it again. Please stop. Never again. (Except he would, because the magic was his and he could not more stop the magic than he could stop breathing. But that was insignificant now, something incidental to be set aside. Father must not know.)
He was aware of the present again. Was this the end, or was it just an intermission?
"I discipline you out of love," the Master said with sardonically. "Now, you were saying?"
He tried to speak, but couldn't.
A crease of annoyance marred the Master's brow, but this time He looked curious. "Ah yes. They were your classmates." The Master's gaze bore into him. "This ... sentimentality is unbecoming of you, Severus. But why?"