Caroline had stopped off on the way to the hospital and bought Kate some flowers. As she approached Kate's bed she looked in to see Helena fast asleep in her cot. "She's just had a feed." Kate smiled and Caroline turned towards her presenting her card and the flowers.
Caroline's heart filled with pride for her beautiful girlfriend. "She is very beautiful Kate. Just like her mum."
Kate looking over with a concern smiled. "Caroline. Can we go for a walk? I'll get Louise to keep an eye on Helena."
"Yeah sure." Caroline tried to ready herself for what was to come. She took a deep breath before turning to Kate. "Is this about Gregg?"
"How did you know?" Kate's face looked genuinely shocked.
"Louise the nurse told me." Caroline couldn't hide her anxiety and Kate saw the pain in her eyes. "She wasn't gossiping. It was purely conversation." Caroline bit her lip and looked down to her feet.
"Come on. I'll get Louise and we can sit in the day room with some privacy". Kate walked slowly to the nurses' station and Louise followed her back.
Louise smiled believing the couple were seeking some quality time. "Go on you two. Have some nice time together. You'll have your hands full soon enough with Helena here." Caroline knew Louise's smile was genuine and she didn't know there was any tension between the two women or why Gregg was a difficult word for Caroline to swallow.
Kate took Caroline's hand and led her to the day room. Caroline took her hand without hesitation or concern. She was getting used to their public displays of affection. Kate has noted this and she felt proud.
They settled on a sofa side by side and Kate reached to pick up the remote control for the TV to switch it off. There was no-one else around so they weren't disturbing anyone. Kate looked at Caroline and took her hands in her own on her lap. Her bump was still visible. "I'm sorry you found about Gregg from Louise. His visit wasn't expected and I didn't invite him."
"What did he want …. Besides you know Helena?"
"He wanted to see Helena and see that she was okay." Kate couldn't read Caroline's face. She wasn't sure how Caroline was feeling about the situation. She knew Caroline wouldn't be overly pleased but she couldn't hide the fact he'd visited. Kate continued, "We had a discussion and he is still in agreement that he'll stay out of the picture. That is if we want it that way and rather than make a decision without talking with you first I thought I would see how you felt about things Caroline."
Caroline took a little time to think. "Well. I feel a little torn really. I recognise he is Helena's biological father and when Helena grows older she'll want to know the story. However, I'm kind of finding it difficult because I feel out of the picture with Gregg in the picture. But I don't want my own feelings to impact on Helena's future. He's a constant reminder that I couldn't give you what you desired."
Kate looked at Caroline and gently stroked her cheek. "I never wanted this to be difficult for you Caroline. I know you and Gregg didn't get off on the right foot, which was probably my fault for forcing you to meet him. I feel torn too. I want us to be Helena's parents and to bring her up together. But I can't help thinking about how I would feel now if I didn't have a father. I don't know how I'd feel if I found out when I was older that I had a father who had chosen not to be around."
Caroline took Kate's hand from her cheek and squeezed them in her own. "What does Gregg really want? I mean does he want to be in Helena's life or is he simply trying to stick to the promise he made?"
"I'm not really sure. I get the impression he would be happy to walk away and let us bring Helena up without him. Maybe the answer is that we agree to be honest with Helena when she grows up and if she wants to meet Gregg when she is older we agree she can. What do you think?" Kate was genuinely concerned for Caroline and how she felt about things.
Caroline looked up to the ceiling, hoping someone would give her an answer to all the turmoil in her heart and her head. "Can we think about it Kate. We don't have to rush into a decision now. I don't want to make the wrong decision and regret things later."
Kate nodded in agreement but she could see the turmoil etched on Caroline's face. "I'm so sorry Caroline. I really didn't think about how this would be in the future. I guess I was so driven to be a mother I didn't stop to think about ….. After ….. About you."
Caroline smiled and gently stroked Kate's hair out of her face. She felt so happy to be a part of Kate's life again. She didn't want the aching she was feeling. Tired of all the issues burning down on her Caroline felt weary. Her mother's attitude and her walking on egg-shells around her, Lawrence's pain with growing up, John's behaviour and the divorce, the future living arrangements for them all and then Gregg's sudden re-appearance. She didn't want to burden Kate with all her thoughts and tribulations. "Kate. We can work this through. There always seems to be something getting in the way but I want you to know I love you and I really missed you."
Kate's smile was wide and filled her face. It was the first time Caroline had seen that huge smile that melted her heart in a long time. She knew then that things would be okay in the end.
"How did you get on with Lawrence and your chat?"
Caroline laughed giving some relief to the tension between them. "Well, I had to endure a lunch at McDonald's believe it or not."
Kate laughed out loud and then covered her face when she realised Caroline wasn't laughing. "Dr Elliot in McDonald's. Well I never."
Caroline gave Kate a look that said it all. "I will not be repeating that experience ever again. Helena will not be going to McDonald's if I have anything to do with it!"
Kate grinned, "Oh no, no, no, definitely not." As much as she tried she couldn't help herself and burst out laughing again.
"Kate this is not funny. Anyway back to Lawrence. I asked him how he would feel about us all living together in the future. And he said he wasn't keen on crying babies and dirty nappies. He asked if we all got a house together that we get one with an annexe so Helena could live there like Celia and Alan."
Kate smiled. "That's so sweet. Would you want us hidden away in a 'Baby Annexe'?"
Caroline laughed, "Oh god no. That wouldn't be much fun would it? Anyway. I asked Lawrence how he felt about you and me now. He surprised me by telling me I was much happier when you were in my life." Caroline smiled and held Kate's hands again. She gently squeezed them and then rubbed Kate's arms in a show of affection. "I had to agree with him. My life has been pretty miserable without you Kate."
Kate smiled, "I know how you feel. I wasn't exactly enjoying things either. Despite what you may have thought. I was just being stubborn when you reached out to me asking for another chance. My heart was screaming yes but my head was still stuck in the past. I'm sorry about the way I treated you."
"It's okay. We're here now." Caroline moved closer to Kate and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. She'd missed those soft and silky lips and the sight of Kate's huge smile was enough to stir up Caroline's desires. Kate reciprocated and the kiss deepened with the women both getting more passionate. A deep-throated cough startled the two women who immediately jumped apart. They both turned at the same time to see Nurse Grimm's face of thunder, filling the doorway of the dayroom.