liam the luton lion: Thanks for the review:) , but was that a good wow, or a bad one?
Froggie2: Your one of the most positive people I've ever met, both virtually, and in reality. Total opposite of myself, but I'm glad for you. I'll try not to disappoint you, but it's going to be a bit more before they get together. I'll do my best to write it well. Thanks for posting:)
1lightningbolt: Tragedy, and heart break, but maybe if she can hang in there she might be able to get through it. Thanks for posting :)
T-person: Thanks for the Go Cho! Well Harry kind of found that out last chapter, but now he needs to do something about it. As for finding out about Marietta, well he'll have problems of his own coming up soon.
timothy4111: Thanks for posting:) Well actually the reason that no one has found the room yet is simply because it wasn't convenient for the story. I did put that it was a room that no one usually went into, one used for storage. Also the students were sent to that part of the castle, so the house elves had their own assignments, and I thought that although there were many house elves that there were not enough to search the entire castle in a few weeks, plus there are only about six ghost, that actually work for the school, so even though they can go through walls they can't cover the castle in that short of time, also they can't smell the body. Harry, Cho, Nancy, and Hermione were the people who have come closets so far to the location of the body. But the body will be found soon enough.
Well because Cho is leaving forever, (she thinks anyway) she will forgive him. But that doesn't mean that she will forget, or won't hurt from it anymore. Harry does deserve to get his arse kicked for saying that, but due to time constraints for the story he'll get a reprieve. But he's gonna have to work hard to make it up to Cho.
Hello everyone, sorry it took so long to get this up, but I've been going through a training class to work at the airport, at the X-ray machine. Well, it's a little long, but it's been cut down from about half of what I had intended. Anyway not much action, but I tried to hit the plot points. Anyway I once saw a movie when I was younger called Ernest goes to Camp on a video tape. It had a song on it that sort of describes how Cho feels in this. I posted part of the lyrics at that bottom. I'm kind of rusty I think, so this chapter won't be very good, but uh, hope you like it anyway.
Chapter 50: Final Goodbyes
Harry kept his eyes on the entrance to the great Hall, trying not to blink least he miss her entrance. It was the third day since he had made the comment to Cho, and it would be his third attempt to try and talk to her, by getting past her friends at the Ravenclaw table. Over the past two days he had already received numerous threats from Jeremy Stretton, and the other members of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team, to leave her alone, or he would get his head smashed in. It also appeared that Cho didn't want to talk to him either. She looked away from him whenever he shouted to get her attention, and she only entered the great hall to grab a plate of food, and then leave, most probably back to Ravenclaw tower. Harry would always try to run up and chat with her, but several angry looking Ravenclaws would always block his way. The Huffelpuff girl was right. He had suddenly become somewhat unpopular, not just with the Ravenclaws, but some students from the other houses as well. But he didn't care what anyone but Cho thought of him. No, that wasn't true. He didn't want to be thought of as a racist to anyone either, but Cho's view was the most important. She had really been the one deeply hurt by his remarks, and he owed her more than a simple apology.
But Harry had taken steps to get help for his violent outburst. Hermione had joined him when he went to speak to Professor McGonagall, and the long talk that the three of them had had was a good first step. Professor McGonagall agreed to allow Harry to see a Muggle psychiatrist when one that was apparate to bring to Hogwarts could be found. As acting Head Master she had that right. McGonagall hadn't been to keen on the idea of Harry using science from the muggle world to solve his problems when cheering charms were available, but Harry was insistent on a more permanent solution, so McGonagall finally relented.
She also informed Harry of the death of Bellatrix Lestrange, and the large scale battle that Dumbledore had had with some dementors and a couple of giants. For a great Wizard like Dumbledore the dementors were easy to handle, but even his stunning spells were not able to defeat the Giants, and every attempt to use limited force had failed. Dumbledore's constant hesitation had cost a fellow Wizard his life, and he and the remaining members of the Order of the Phoenix had to finally blast them with the Aver cadaver curse. In fact Dumbledore himself had been wounded slightly in the battle by Bellatrix Lestrange, who had brought down a house on top of him, she had walked over to step on the roof of the remains of what she thought was Dumbledore's tomb, to boast to her fellow dark side allies, but Dumbledore had used a shielding charm to keep himself from being hit by most of the debris, and blasted the collapsed roof of the house out from under her, causing her to fly several feet to the side, landing in a loud thud. After Dumbledore had raised the roof of the ground with a levitation charm he used his wand to throw the collapsed collection of wood, and stone, large and small onto Bellatrix herself, giving her his own intended fate. After the battle and being patched up, he had returned to Hogsmead in the night by apperating, and walked to Hogwarts, to his office to make some reports, and manage some paperwork, then as soon as he was done had to leave again, back to Eastern Europe.
Harry was a bit shocked by the news of Bellatrix's death, he had wanted a personal revenge of his very own, but it was taken away from him. Still he was not unhappy with Dumbledore for it. It was actually the nicest thing that the head Master had done for him in a while. Besides there was always Voldermort and Wormtail for him.
The one thing that did bother Harry was that he had thought of asking for information on his inheritance while he was with Professor McGonagall, and she said that she didn't have any information on it. Harry was having a hard time believing her, as she couldn't seem to look at him when she had said it, and she excused herself rather curtly soon there after. He wasn't sure what to make of it, but he was sure it was yet another attempt to keep things from him.
That was two days ago, and besides that incident and classes, he spent every moment looking for an opportunity to talk to Cho alone. He searched in the Potions class that she had been working in those nights, but she didn't come, and the only occupant of the room in fact was Barney Crouch's former house elf, Pinky. In fact she had not only seemed to stop going out at night, and after school, but to his emotional torment he had found that Cho had already turned in her wand, and was only awaiting the Hogwarts Express, which had arrived this very morning. Harry had even cried on Fiona's shoulder but not been honest about why, claiming that he was upset about the death of his godfather instead. She had been very nice to him, but it was really Cho whose arms that he wanted to be in. He was sure that that was not as much of a probability as it might have been before he made such a stupid, racist statement, to her. Also Harry was feeling guilty about going off on Cho, when she must be worried about her mum dying. He had said that he had wanted to trade places with Cho, that her problems were nothing when compared to his, now so many of his seemed to pale in comparison to Cho's.
Collin Creevey had mentioned about an aunt of his that had gone through breast cancer, and had a breast removed. He spoke of words that he himself barley understood, like chemo therapy, and radiation treatment, saying that he didn't know what they were, just that they were really painful ways to try and fix her. In the end however, they didn't save her, and she died. Collin had added that from what his family had told him, it was not a painless death, and not by any means quick. This added to Harry's guilt.
Hermione walked up and sat down next to Harry.
"Harry how are you today?" she asked. Harry looked down at his empty plate, breakfast had not been fixed by the house elves yet. He gave a large sigh before answering.
"I'm miserable Hermione. I haven't been able to speak to her at all. Every time I try to approach her I'm blocked by other students who are pissed at me, and not all of them Ravenclaws. I just want to tell her that I'm sorry, and I just… but she doesn't want to speak to me anymore. I tried but she avoids me now. I spend all my time that I can outside the Ravenclaw tower now looking for the secret entrance, but to no avail. I even used my invisibility cloak to try and see someone entering, but I never did. I was there all day today, waiting without the cloak, hoping that people would tell her that I was outside and wanted to talk. But finally Beverly Jones, one of Cho's friends, told me that Cho wanted me to leave her alone. But I can't let it be so unresolved. I have to apologize to her. I feel so bad about calling her that, and so bad about suspecting her of going against me. I should have known that it wasn't true." Harry finished unhappily. Hermione looked at him curiously for a moment before she spoke.
"Harry, I've been meaning to ask where you first heard that word. I mean I heard it on telly in a movie. But it's a word that I would never use. What context did you hear it in?" Hermione asked. Harry lowered his head.
"I heard my Uncle use it. He sales drills you know. Well basically he was talking to my aunt Petunia about one of his employees who was able to secure him a very juicy oversees contract with an American company, and she thought that he should invite him to dinner if he was that good. My uncle said, and I quote:
"Not bloody likely, the mans a… well that word. That's when she agreed and said that he was right not to bring him home. It was the first time I had heard the word, and my cousin Dudley had asked what it meant. Uncle Vernon told him, and he was saying it next week in school forever to anyone Asian." Harry said in monotone. Hermione listened intently.
"And why did you say it Harry?" Hermione asked point blank. Harry gave a sad sigh.
"Because I wanted to hurt her then. I wanted to really hurt her. I don't know why. I've just been getting angry a lot since last year. I just, I don't know why. I just have almost fits of rage. So much has been going on, and I just blow up, it's like…" Harry started to finish but was cut off.
"There's Cho Harry, now's your chance!" Hermione said suddenly. Harry looked up to see Cho putting food on a plate in a hurry. Several students tried to speak with her, but she politely told them that she could not talk about what they wanted to know about. Harry got up and started to walk over towards Cho. By the time he had gotten close to her, dinner started to magically appear on the tables, and she had already filled her plate, and looked ready to head out. Harry rushed more quickly down the length of the Ravenclaw table, and was almost on her, when Jeremy Stretton and another Ravenclaw Quidditch team member named Ingleby stepped out in front of him to block his way, an annoyed look on their faces.
"Hey, where do you think your going Potter?" Stretton demanded. Harry tried to push past them, but they collectively held him back.
"Let me though Stretton, I just want to say that I'm sorry. I need to apologize to her." Harry said in a forceful tone.
"Forget it Potter, she doesn't want to talk, not to you or anyone else. I head what you said to her, and quite frankly she doesn't want to here it. She just wants to be left alone. If you want to apologize, send her an owl." Stretton said. Harry continued to attempt through Stretton and his mate, as he saw Cho exit the Great Hall, but the two weren't letting him go anywhere.
"Let me through, it'll be too late to send her an Owl. I have to say that I'm sorry in person. She's supposed to be leaving tomorrow. I can't let it end like this, with her thinking that I'm a racist. " Harry demanded.
"Well aren't you Potter?" Inglby inquired hotly.
"No! I said something incredibly stupid, and I'm sorry, but I didn't mean it. So I need to tell her that." Harry said angrily.
"True Potter, and if you weren't trying to apologize to her for it. I'd be using you to mop up the floor, but get this anyway… she doesn't want to talk. So just send her an owl, but otherwise leave her alone. She doesn't want to talk right now." Stretton said hotly, but finally stepped out of Harry's way. Harry ran at full speed out into the corridor that led out of the Great Hall.
"Cho! Cho!" He called looking around at both ends of the corridor. He spotted a black haired girl walking away from him and ran over to her grabbing her shoulder, and turning her around.
"Listen Cho, I…" Harry started, but when he turned the surprised girl around, it wasn't Cho, she wasn't even Asian. "Err… sorry wrong person." He said. The girl knocked his hand away, and started off down the hall again. Harry slid down against the wall, until he was sitting down. He put him arms over his knees, and buried his head down, a dark depression setting in, as he thought of how stupid he was for missing his chance to talk to her again. It was only a moment before he realized that someone was crying close bye. Harry raised his head, and looked up at a sign over a door that read girls lavatory. The crying was coming from inside there, and it wasn't the bathroom that moaning Myrtle haunted. The crying was defiantly coming from in there. Cho! He thought. Harry got up again and rushed toward the door. Harry pushed the door open and walked inside. "Cho? Are you okay?" Harry asked unsure. He walked into the area with the stalls, to the front of the one that the crying was coming from. He grabbed the door to open it, but the bolt was locked, and all he could do was rattle it. "Cho, open up. Please I need to talk to you. I'm sorry for what I said. Please open up." Harry begged.
"It's not Cho, Harry," came a familiar voice. Harry heard the latch open and the door swung to reveal a tearful Luna Lovegood. She stood up from the toilet that she sat on, and hugged him.
"Luna?" Harry asked surprised. Luna looked up at him, her face distraught.
"Harry, Cho won't even talk to me anymore. I wasn't supposed to tell anyone. I begged her forgiveness, but… but she won't even talk to me. She doesn't even yell at, or insult to me… just doesn't acknowledge me at all. She's like a sister to me, but I betrayed her trust. I didn't mean too. Now she's leaving, and I may never see her again. I don't want it to end like this; we can't part on these terms." Luna cried her head on Harry's shoulder. Harry hugged her back.
"I know exactly how you feel Luna. I said something stupid to her. She won't talk to me either. I'd give the world to take it back. Every time I try to talk to her, people at her table stop me." Harry said sadly.
"She really likes you Harry. She talks about you all the time. She did, but she barley talks anymore. Tomorrow, she's gone from here forever, I…" Luna started, but couldn't finish as tears fell from her eyes. Harry and Luna cried for a time in each others arms until a Slytheren girl, Pansy Parkinson walked in on them.
"Hey what are you doing here? This is the girl's lavatory!" she shouted angry. Harry and Luna released their embrace, and walked past Pansy. "No shagging in here people, we have to use this facility!" Pansy said after them angrily. In the hall they both sat on the ground in states of depression. A brief time passed before Harry spoke again. He turned to Luna.
"Did… did she really turn in her wand?" Harry asked. Luna nodded her head.
"Professor Flitwick was very surprised, but he's not trying to convince her to stay, not with her mum… you know." Luna said quietly.
"Tell me Luna… tell me about her mum, what's happening. What's the whole story? I need to know." Harry pleaded. Luna looked at him with a sad face.
"I can't tell you that Harry. Cho trusted in me not to say anything, and I screwed up. I know you think now that she's not speaking to me that I'm not under any obligation to say anymore, but… I actually am. Cho will have to tell you when she's ready. If she never does… then that's just the way it was meant to be. Oh, I'm sorry about throwing the punch in your face the other day." Luna finished. Harry gave a sad chuckle.
"Ha! Don't be… I deserved it. I will miss her." Harry said sadly. Luna nodded.
"Me too. She's one of my only friends. Now she hates me…" Luna finished, wiping her eyes. Harry gave her another hug.
"She can't hate you Luna, maybe she just needs time." Harry comforted her. The two sat there in silence as students passed to and fro, not caring about anything else, but reflecting on Cho's past kindness to them. Luna on how Cho stood up for her against Marietta and Harry how she stood up for him last year from the beginning. Tomorrow would be a truly sad day for the two of them.
Saturday, Ravenclaw Tower, Cho's dorm Room:
Cho stood up on a chair and looked outside her window at the students playing outside by the lake. People were laughing, swimming, and enjoying themselves. Cho remembered when she was one of the people down by the lake, Times when she was happy, the fun that she used to have playing down by the water, or just chatting with friends, or even just reading a book under the shade of a nice tree in the open air. She would never be able to do that here again. This was her last day at Hogwarts, and she missed the school already. But she noticed something odd. There didn't seem to be a lot of Ravenclaw students that she could see from the window. Perhaps they were eating in the Great Hall. She didn't know. A single tear fell from her eye. She would miss everything, this was her home for so long, filled with her friends, and now she would never see it again. Cho stepped down from the window, and started putting the last of her things in the steamer trunk on her bed. When she was done, she closed the lid. She heard a cooing behind her and turned to see the Owl that Luna had given her for her birthday. Cho looked at the owl unsure of what to do with it. It was the last gift that Luna would ever give her. After she left she would never speak to her again, she couldn't after such a betrayal. She had been hurt too much, and Luna had practically screamed it out to the entire school. How could she forgive her now? Luna was the only one that Cho had trusted with the secrete. How do you just let something like that slip? She asked herself. Luna may be hurting, but so am I. I'm losing her as a friend too. It sucks that it has to end like this. I'm too mad at her to forgive her now. I need… time. I need time. Cho thought. The door to the dorm room opened, and Beverly walked in flanked by Nancy, and Erica, each wearing solemn faces. Beverly managed a weak smile.
"Ready Cho?" she asked. Cho nodded, picking up her steamer trunk, and walking to the door. Nancy looked over at the owl in the cage.
"Do you want me to get the owl Cho?" she asked. Cho looked at it again for a moment, wondering if she should keep it to remember Luna by. No. I have photos of us hanging out together for that. She thought.
"No… leave it. Give it back to Luna later." Cho said.
"You… you know Cho… she really is sorry. She feels really bad about it." Erica said softly. Cho nodded.
"Yea, I know… I feel bad about it too. Give it back to her later." Cho finished, and walked out the door, with her three friends following her. When she rounded the corner of the spiraling staircase she found the common room full of Ravenclaw students. Cho looked up at Beverly.
"You said that I could get out of here quietly today Beverly." Cho said in a whisper. Beverly shrugged her shoulders.
"You didn't really think that they would let you leave without saying goodbye did you Cho." Beverly said with a smile. Cho made her way to the center of the room, and the students came up to hug her, one by one. Some crying, some wishing her well, and some reminding her to write to them every chance that she got. Each of them telling her how sorry they were about her mother. It was very embarrassing for her, but she was polite, and sincerely appreciative of their good intentions. A few of them asked for more information about her mum, how she was doing, and what the specifics were, but Cho politely told them that she couldn't discuss it. After saying her goodbyes Cho started towards the exit of the Ravenclaw common room and she saw Danielle giving her a distasteful look, but with Cho's friends all around, she didn't dare do, or say anything to Cho. Marietta was conspicuously absent, but that was nothing to complain about.
Cho and her roommates left the Ravenclaw Tower, and headed down the corridor towards the Great Hall so that Cho could pack one last lunch for her last trip on the Hogwarts Express. There were not that many students in the Great Hall yet, although some were coming in now because the weather was getting cloudy, and it appeared that it might rain. Cho sat down at the table for a minute, and waited until the plate in front of her magically filled with food. Fortunately the meal was beef sausage patties, and biscuits, so after putting the patties between the two biscuit halves, it was easy for Cho to put it in her brown paper bag for the trip. Cho also produced a thermos and filled it with hot tea. A few apples added to the bag and she was ready to go.
The trio made their way to the main exit of the great hall, and continued on toward the doors that lead down the path to the Hogwarts Express. At the closed exit door Luna Lovegood waited for Cho. Cho stopped and waited for her to move aside and let her through. Luna's eyes were full of tears as she looked pleadingly at Cho. Cho on the other hand had a look of anger in her eyes, and her hands tightened on her steamer trunk handle, and the brown bag lunch that she carried.
"Cho… please forgive me… I didn't mean to say anything. I know that you feel I betrayed your trust, but… I didn't mean too. I feel so bad about it. It was a mistake. I'll never do it again. Cho… you're like a big sister to me. I don't want it to be like this. I hate that I let you down, but it won't happen again. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me Cho." Luna pleaded through tear filled eyes. Beverly, Nancy, and Erica all looked down sadly. They had already told Cho that she should forgive Luna, and that it was just a mistake, but Cho was still mad at her, the event still very fresh in her mind, and the damage still done. Cho just stared at Luna, looking like she wanted to hit her in the head, but she said not a word. For several moments everyone was silent, Cho and Luna just staring at each other. Finally Luna could take Cho's angry stair no more. "Cho, please… we've been friends for so long. You've always been there for me, please speak to me." Luna continued to plead. Cho just stood their looking at her with her brown dagger eyes. "Please Cho, say something to me, ca… call me a git for telling everyone your secrete, hit me, or call me a bitch, but just please say anything to me." Luna begged. Cho's breathing was heavy but controlled.
"Get out of my way Luna." She said coldly. Luna looked as if someone had stabbed her in the heart, and she walked off down the corridor sobbing uncontrollable. Cho turned back to her roommates with a look of sadness on her face, but no tears fell from her eyes. "Erica, Nancy if ya don't mind I'll say my goodbye here. I need to talk to Beverly alone. I'll miss you both. You've been the best of… choke… friends. I'm going to miss you all. It was really great to be away from Marietta and Danielle and have caring, excepting people to stay with." She finished. Cho, Nancy, and Erica Hugged in a tight embrace, each of them now were crying as the emotions weald up inside them.
"Cho, you listen to me… we expect you to keep in touch… don't go off and just disappear off the face of the earth. I expect a letter every week." Nancy cried.
"Me, too Cho, and a detailed one at that. You let us know how you're doing, and let us know that you're alright." Erica cried.
"I promise. I promise I'll write. You two take care of yourselves, I'm going to miss you both sooo much." Cho replied. The three girls released there embrace, and said goodbye once more. Cho turned back to Beverly. "Let's go Beverly. I need to talk to you on the way down to the platform." Cho said. Beverly nodded. But for a time Cho said nothing, she just walked in silence, seemingly in deep thought. When they were half way down she stopped and turned back toward the castle. Cho looked over the structure, one last glance at a place she had spent a great deal of her life at. For a long moment she was fixed on it, remembering all the things that had happened to her, good and bad, and all the things that she had done in the school. The fun that she had had in Charms classes, conversations with friends in the great hall at dinner, being with Cedric at the Yule Ball, DA classes with Harry, and just being with friends in her common room. A lifetime of memories at this magical place, and now she was leavening, and she would never see Hogwarts again. Beverly came up and hugged her from behind and also gazed up at the castle.
"I meant what I said Cho. Hogwarts will miss you, not just the students or that masters, but the very walls themselves." Beverly said with tears in her eyes. Cho nodded.
"I know, I'll miss it too. I'll miss all of you." Cho replied. She turned to face Beverly… promise me you'll do something for me." Cho said softly.
"Sure Cho, anything, what do you want me to do for you?" she asked.
"Promise me that you'll take care of Luna for me. She's going to have a difficult time now that I can't watch over her. Make sure no one teases her, okay?" Cho said, more tears forming in her eyes. Beverly smiled.
"You mean your not mad at her anymore Cho, why didn't you tell her?" Beverly asked happily.
"No… I am still mad at her, very much so. Just… I need time… don't tell her that I told you to take care of her, just please make sure that no one picks on her." Cho finished.
"I promise, Cho. I promise that I'll look after her. No ones going to bother her." Beverly nodded.
"Thank you, now let's go." Cho said, and the two of them started back down the path to the platform. As they walked on Cho looked at Beverly. "I just wanted to say thank you for everything that you've done for me over the years Beverly. I'm very grateful for all your help in school, and being there to console me about Cedric. You've been a really good friend, and I wish that I had been a better one." Cho said softly.
"For every thing that I've done? Cho, you've done far more for me than I can ever repay you for. You've been the one who was there for me every time. Especially when you gave me the courage to stand up to people like Marietta when I needed it most. Thank you Cho, I owe you so much." Beverly said sincerely. Cho shook her head.
"No Beverly, you don't owe me anything, that's what friends do for each other. You would have done the same for me. And I'm not keeping score." Cho said. Cho, sadden from her departure, had her eyes to the ground as they continued to walk, so she didn't see the person waiting for her at the train platform until Beverly shouted.
"What the fuck are you doing here? Get the hell out of here." Beverly shouted. Cho looked up in surprise to see Harry Potter waiting at the train station, a depressed look on his face. He started to walk up to the two of the girls, but Beverly pushed him back roughly, almost sending him falling over a wooden bench. "Get out of here Potter! Cho's had enough of your insults, and you biting her head off, she's never done anything to you, and you always, attack her. Well not this time, you're going to let her leave in peace. Do you understand? Piss off Wanker!" Beverly said drawing her wand.
"Look I just want to talk to Cho this is my last chance. I'm not here to fight, and I just… I have some things to say, and I'm not letting her leave until I say them. Now you Ravenclaws have kept me from seeing Cho all week, and this time you're not going too." Harry said in a serious, but civil tone.
"Forget it Potter, she doesn't want to talk to you. You're a racist git, who has treated her badly since last year. Now get lost before I have to hurt you. Beverly said holding her wand in a threatening manner. Harry pulled out his own wand to counter.
"Look, I don't want to duel with you, but if I have to, in able to talk with Cho I will. Not let me see her! Harry shouted, ready to fight with the girl.
"I said for get it! This is it for you Potter Fungu…" Beverly started to say a cure, and Harry started to say a freezing spell at the same time, but both were distracted, by Cho's shouting.
"Stop it! Stop, this is stupid." Cho cried. Beverly put your wand down, please." She begged. Beverly looked at her with disappointment.
"But Cho, he…" she started, but was cut off.
Cho walked over to Beverly, and grabbed onto her wand, lowering it to the ground, for safety. Cho then hugged Beverly again tightly. She gave her a last look.
"Thank you so much for walking me down here Beverly, but I want to hear what he has to say. I'll be okay." Cho said. Beverly shook her head.
"Cho, I still believe he's dangerous. Remember what everyone said that he did to those Slytheren boys on the train, and what he did to Cindy Miggins, and how he's treated you all this time? You can't trust him Cho." Beverly said concerned. Cho looked back at Harry, and then at Beverly again.
"I don't believe that that was him about Cindy Miggins, but I have to hear what he has to say. I'll be okay, please go back to the castle Beverly; he's not going to hurt me. I promise." Cho said. Beverly gave her a sad look for a moment, and then walked up to Harry grabbing his collar.
"Now you look here Mr. Potter! That is my best friend right there, and if you harm one hair on her head, so help me I'll break every bone in your body! Do you understand me?" Beverly said. Harry nodded.
"I understand, I don't… I'm not here to attack her. Just to talk." Harry said monotonically. Beverly looked at Harry coldly. She released her grip on his collar, and said goodbye to Cho one last time, then left to head up back to the castle. Cho and Harry looked at each other for long silent moment before anyone spoke. Cho looked around, they were alone. She then looked back at Harry.
"Well, now's your chance Harry. You can get in some final shots at me before I leave. What would you like to say to me? How would you like to hurt me this time." Cho said quietly. Harry looked at her, his face full of shame.
"Cho, I… I'm so sorry for what I called you. I didn't mean it. I wasn't thinking. I've been trying to apologize to you the past three days, but no one would let me near you. I'm sorry." Harry said sincerely.
"Sorry for what Harry? You've said many hurtful things about me. Which one are you sorry for, calling me a human hosepipe? Calling me a bitch… a chink? Which one are you sorry about because they all hurt very much." Cho said without emotion. Harry's voice started to shake.
"I'm sorry for all of it. I… it was a mistake. I didn't mean to say those things…" Harry started, but was cut off.
"Then why did you Harry? Why did you say those things, and hurt me. And I am still hurt. Because I get called those things by people like Marietta, and it hurts some, but I've learned that that's the kind of person that she is, and she means nothing to me. But when it comes from you… why would you say those things to me?" Cho asked sobbing a little. Harry lowered his head.
"I don't know Cho, I've been angry lately. I don't know why. It's caused me to lash out, without reason. I'm sorry about… really, and I also didn't know about your mum. So I feel very guilty about it." Harry said.
"So, if… my mum wasn't sick than it would be okay to say those things to me, is that it?" Cho asked sarcastically. Harry shook his head.
"No Cho. It's… there's no excuse for it. I feel awful about it. I'm not like that. It's not me. Really!" Harry said ashamed. Cho's face did not show any emotion as she spoke.
"But it has been you Harry. It's been you a lot, and I can't take it anymore. I've done nothing but stand up for you, and… and you treat me like shit. Why? What did I ever do to you that was so bad? Marietta? If I had known what she was going to do to the DA, I would have never brought her, but how many times can I say that I'm sorry Harry. Because it's never good enough for you anyway. I can't win over your trust. You always suspect me of plotting against you, something that I've never done. But you still don't trust me… so I guess you're right… what's the point of the two of us being friends." Cho said, coldly, but the realization of it was tearing her up inside.
"Cho, I… I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry that I did, and I really didn't mean it when I said that we shouldn't e friends anymore. I do want to be friends. Please give me another chance." Harry pleaded. Cho sat down on a wooden bench on the platform to rest.
"Harry, I've done a lot of thinking… about last year, and this one in particular. It seems every time we fought that I was the one who always tried to rebuild the connection between us. I always tried to make the effort to bond with you on some level. Sometimes… sometimes I couldn't look at you or speak to you because you hurt me so much, but in the end I worked hard to reach out to you. That last day last year, when we saw each other in the corridor… I wanted you to try and reach out to me, but you didn't, and it hurt. At Hogsmead, when I needed to talk about Cedric, you didn't want to talk to me, and I needed to confide in you desperately. Maybe it was wrong of me to bring it up on a date, and I'm sorry for that, but… I loved him very much, and I needed to bring some closure to that part of my life. I needed to know about what happened, so that I could put it behind me. You said that you didn't want to talk about it, but then this year I found out that you went and told the whole thing to Rita Skeeter. Luna told me. She said you didn't particularly like her… but you told her everything that you couldn't tell me. I did have feelings for you Harry, I told you during Christmas, but you didn't understand. I told you that I really liked you, and it was hard for me, because I had a lot of feelings of guilt about feeling this way about someone so soon after Cedric's death. I kissed you, but you didn't say anything too me. Now this year… all you do is suspect me of being your enemy, so… I just can't win. So I'm leaving here today… I have to go home, people there need me, and I need them. But it's clear that you don't need me, and I've come to realize that I don't need you. You're bad for me Harry Potter. Any word from you can shatter my heart, and your words are too often hurtful. I'm not a strong person. I don't know if the people that hang out with you are used to your insulting them, or maybe they just are stronger willed, and can brush off such abuse, but I'm not strong like that. So I can't take the treatment that you may be used to giving you friends." Cho said all this to Harry in a soft, non aggressive tone, sounding more like a teacher instructing a student about a historical event.
"Cho, I don't treat my friends like that. I don't… call them names." Harry said, choking back tears. He walked over and sat next to Cho on the bench. "Please Cho; I'm not like that to people." Harry said. Cho nodded.
"I believe you Harry; I guess I just warrant special treatment like that. But you see, you hurt me, and so it's not ever going to work out between us in any form. You know… what hurts more than the hateful comments of calling me a bitch, a human hosepipe, and a… chink, is that fact that you don't trust me at all. I've never done anything against you, Harry, and tried to help you when ever I could, but… you'll never trust me… and that hurts more than anything else." Cho said. Harry shook his head, and grabbed her arm.
"No Cho, please I believe you. I didn't know about your mother before. I didn't know about… how you and Marietta were enemies, and how she did mean stuff to you. I believe every word that you say, and I'll never doubt you again. I promise. I want to fix this, I don't want you to leave thinking I'm your enemy." Harry said pleadingly. I've been so bad to you and I want to take it back. Please Cho I want to be friends, I want you to stay here at Hogwarts and be with me, and I'll never hurt you, or not trust you again." Harry begged.
"I can't stay Harry. I'm needed at home. I shouldn't have come back here this year; I'm just too stupid for it." Cho finished.
"Your not stupid Cho, your very bright, and I want to be friends, don't hate me Cho. It's your mum that's part of the reason that you have to go. I understand… but I want you to come back after you see your mum. I'm sorry that she's sick Cho. I really am." Harry cried, with tears rolling down his eyes. Cho had a smirk on her face.
"Still want to trade places with me Harry? After all, my problems are silly in comparison, aren't they?" Cho asked, not raising her voice. Harry took off his glasses and whipped his tearstained eyes with his arm, before he spoke.
"No… no Cho I wouldn't want to trade places with you. I guess I got to feeling that I was the only person that bad things happened to." Harry said quietly. Cho looked at him sadly.
"Well you're not Harry… your not." Cho said in monotone. Harry held Cho's hand.
"Cho, don't leave here hating me, please… I feel bad about what I said. I'm not a racist; I've never said anything like that before. Please… believe me." Harry asked. Cho removed his hand from hers, and put her hand on his shoulder. She looked Harry directly in the eyes.
"I… I don't think that you're a racist Harry. But that doesn't make what you said to me hurt any less. In fact it hurts more because I never thought that you would ever be capable of saying something like that. I mean, I've come to expect it from people like Marietta, but… it's done now… you can't take it back, so just forget it. Anyway I don't hate you either. I never did, she said looking deep into his eyes.
"Then come back to me when you're done. When you're finished visiting your mum… come back here." Harry said weakly. "Cho look, there is too much between us to just throw away because of some stupid mistake I made." Harry continued.
"There is nothing between us Harry." Cho said closing her eyes, and looking away from him.
"But we… we know each other so well now Cho…" Harry started. Cho shook her head.
"We don't know each other at all Harry. All I know about you is that you're The Harry Potter hero of the magic world…. And to you… I'm just a sobbing school girl that… that you can't even trust. There's no reason for me to come back Harry." Cho said, her voice breaking, but no tears this time.
"No… Cho, I do trust you now! I completely trust you…" Harry started in a panic, but Cho cut him off.
"Why do you trust me now Harry, What's changed?" Cho asked.
"Because, Luna told me about your mum, and Marietta, and about your party. Now I know everything, and I trust you." Harry said with all sincerity. Cho closed her eyes, and gave a heavy sigh.
"You don't know anything about it Harry, and besides… you've only just proven my point. You had to hear it from Luna before you believed in my innocence. I had been telling you all along, and that's why it won't work out between us Harry, you would always have to hear something from someone else before you believed me. How can you have any type of relationship without trust?" Cho asked sadly.
"Cho… I, look I do…" Harry started, but was again cut off by Cho.
"Harry! We only have a short time until I have to go… lets talk about something else. She said.
"Talk about what else? What could be more important than this? Cho I've been trying to apologize to you." Harry said desperately.
"Harry, I accept your apology, but I don't want to talk about it anymore." Cho finished.
"Then you'll come back soon after you check up on your mum? We can see each other again, when you get back?" Harry asked hopefully. Cho looked at him for a moment, a sad expression on her face.
"Harry, I'm never coming back here… I'm leaving the Wizarding world forever." Cho said quietly. Harry just sat there in total shock for a moment before he could answer, and even then, he couldn't express himself the way he wanted to.
"What? Don't be ridiculous Cho, you're a pureblood, you'd… you'd never make it in the Muggle world without magic. You should stay here in this world, believe me there is nothing for you out there, and you'd hate it Cho!" Harry said trying to think of reasons for Cho to stay. Harry hadn't known that Cho had planed to leave the Wizarding World, especially forever. It was a horrific thought that he hadn't counted on in the worst case scenario.
"How do you know weather or not I'm capable of making it or not in the Muggle world? I'll have you know that I can use the internet, drive a car, use the telephone, and… I even had a job this summer at a muggle hospital. My cousins even taught me to cook without using magic over the summer. And another thing Harry, there is something for me there. I have family that are Muggle, just like you do." Cho said a little offended at Harry's lack of faith in her. Harry tried to think of a way out of his misspoken statement.
"No, that's not what I meant… I just thought that you didn't… associate with Muggles… I…" Harry stammered. Cho's face turned to one of pity for him.
"Didn't think that I associated with Muggles? Harry… more than half my friends are Muggle borne, or half-blood, and none of that matters to me anyway." Cho protested.
"I know, I didn't mean it that way Cho, really." Harry said with all sincerity.
"Then what way should I take it Harry? You just said that you didn't think I associated with Muggles." Cho said sternly.
"I simply meant that most Wizarding people don't come into contact with Muggles. Two different worlds. Apart from my relatives, the only Muggles that I talk to are Hermione's parents, and that's only once per year when my mates pick up our supplies at Diagon Ally, and I didn't even see them this year at all." Harry said. Cho's expression changed to one of understanding, and she nodded.
"Well… I guess it's the same for me as far as friends parents go, but I have an uncle who's a squib, and his family, which are my family, are Muggles. I love them very much and never cared weather they were magic users or not. Harry, I don't think like that." Cho said.
"I know, really Cho, I never meant to imply that you did." Harry said apologetically.
"Okay Harry, then never mind." Cho replied quietly. Suddenly the two heard the rumble of thunder from high above. They both looked to the sky. "Looks like rain again Harry." Cho said casually. Harry brought his eyes back down to Cho. She was so beautiful, and she had changed her hair back to its beautiful raven black color. Cho wasn't crying this time, but her face still had that sad look that never left her. She was just stunning, at this moment looking up at the clouds, and listening to the loud crack of thunder. Lightning flashed at that moment and, the bright flash caused it to look as if someone were talking a picture of Cho. Harry would have given anything to have Collin Creevey's camera right now, he thought. Pictures! Harry thought.
"Cho, can I have a picture of you!" Harry asked with an excited expression. The question caught Cho off guard, and her jaw dropped.
"Well… I, why do you want one Harry?" she asked.
"Because, I'll miss you, and I won't see you again until Christmas Holliday." Harry said in utmost sincerity. The statement confused Cho.
"Christmas Holliday? Harry I told you, I'm never coming back here." Cho said in a tone of finality. Harry nodded his understanding, and to her surprise, a smile came across his face.
"I know Cho; I'll come to see you! Where do you live, Motherwell Scotland right?" Harry said excited at the prospect of seeing Cho at Christmas.
"No, Harry… I don't think that that would be a good idea. Look, you were just saying that you wanted to end the friendship anyway, well this is our chance at a clean break." Cho said without emotion.
"But Cho, that's not what I want! I want to be friends; I want to be more than friends! I know what I said before, but I was angry, sometimes when you're angry you say things that you don't mean. And I didn't mean what I said about not being friends anymore. Cho please don't do this! Please don't write me out of your life. I really do want to see you again." Harry said desperately. Cho looked away from Harry canceling her facial expression from him.
"I'm sorry Harry, it… it just won't work out between us. I can't deal with everything that's been going on. I… I don't want you to visit me. You belong here, I don't. It just never worked out between us, that's all. You have a girlfriend anyway, but…"
"We'll, she's not really my girlfriend… more like were just dating…" Harry said. "I'm sure that she wouldn't miss me. I'll break up with her."
"… but, I was going to say that it didn't matter. There is still no trust in me. Anyway, it's too late Harry. To an extent you did let me know how you felt about me this year and last. Cho turned to face Harry, and it was a moment before she next spoke. "I'm tired Harry… I'm tired of the drama in this school, tired of not being able to function because of all of the problems that I have here and at home, and tired of… everything. I know that you have so many problems too, and I'm really sorry about it. I just… with me gone, that's one less thing that you have to worry about. I know why you're here right now Harry. You said something stupid, and you feel bad about it. I believe you when you say that you didn't mean it, and your not like that, I do… but your really only here because you needed to apologize, and end the guilt that you feel, because you're a good person who doesn't usually say things that you said to me. I forgive you Harry." Cho said as she stood up. Harry stood up as well. "But… I can't go on like this, fighting, arguing, there are things that I may never be able to tell you, and you always need constant proof from me. I understand, but I… it's not up to me weather or not to tell you things about myself or my family." Cho said, she looked around the castle above them one last time, and a small smile came across her face, as the first raindrops started to fall. "You know Harry; I haven't always had such a bad time here. I've gotten to know this place quite well. My friends and I played hide and seek all over the castle my first few years, I used to study Charms under a tree by the lake, I was very good in charms, Professor Flitwick is my favorite teacher. I got my first kiss from Cedric after the dance…" Cho started to reflect on her memories, but choked a little when she recalled Cedric. She looked at Harry silently, as the cold rain started to pour at a faster rate on the two of them. "I loved him very much Harry. I wonder what might have been if he had not died… if we would have ended up together. I still miss him. I always will. I have many great memories of Cedric. He was… a very special person, and he enriched my live very much. My first kiss from him was something that I will always treasure, as well as the others that we shared." Cho said. Harry looked at Cho dumbfounded as the rain ran down his glasses, blurring his view of her. Their hair started to soak in the continuous pouring, and as they were so close to the train, the pounding of the drops on the metal roof caused the two to have to yell to each other to be heard.
"Cho, why are you saying this to me? Why are you telling me about your intimate moments with Cedric?" Don't you know that it hurts me?" Harry shouted, not out of anger, but to be heard over the thunder, and rain that was soaking them both.
"Because Harry… I needed you to know how much he meant to me, to know how special that he was… because, although I value every moment that I spent with him… my most treasured moment here at Hogwarts, was the kiss that we shared, and that's why I don't want you to visit me. Because you didn't kiss me back that much. You can't have ever had the love that I have for you." Cho said sadly.
"Have for me?" Harry said barley audible in the rain.
"Had for you, Harry… I don't have feelings for you anymore. We have to end it here." Cho corrected herself. The train whistle blew, and they both looked at the conductor motioning Cho to get on board. Harry turned back to Cho.
"You still love me Cho. You still do, and I lo…" Harry started, but Cho put her hand over his mouth.
"Don't say it Harry! Not now… you don't… how could you? We don't even know each other. All I know you as is The Harry Potter, hero of the wizarding world… and to you, I'm just a sobbing school girl who… who you can't' even trust. So now we have to say goodbye."
"Cho, I completely trust you… I…" Harry protested, but Cho stopped him again.
"Forget it Harry, look how do I know that I really didn't only like you because of your fame anyway. My feelings for you might have only been hero worship, how would I know?" Cho said. But Harry finally had an answer to one of her questions, something indisputable.
"Because… you supported me when almost no one else did. When I wasn't The Harry Potter, when everything was against me." Harry protested, starting to shake from the cold, and wondering why they hadn't both moved from their original position, out of the freezing, flowing rain.
"A lot of people supported you after the Quibbler article came out Harry, not just me." Cho countered.
"You supported me before the article came out Cho. Before the DA was started, and before that bitch Umbridge became grand inquisitor." I wasn't popular and you still liked me. You still do. I know it." Harry said. The train whistle blew, and the conductor waved Cho to the last car with an annoyed look on his face. Cho reached out her hand to shake Harry's.
"I'm sorry Harry, it just didn't work out. I don't have feelings for you anymore, and… it's just too late. I wish you well, I always will. Take care of yourself." Harry looked down at Cho's extended hand. Was this it? Did Cho really expect Harry to just shake her hand, and it was over? No, Damit, if this is going to end, it's not going to be like this. Harry grabbed Cho's head on both sides with his hands, and pulled his face quickly up to hers. Kissing her passionately, as her eyes went wide with surprise. The kiss was a little forceful, but it would be his only chance. Harry kept his lips pressed to hers for a long moment as the rain drenched then both. He eventually, moved his head on her shoulder, and put his arms around her body in an emotional hug. She eventually put her head on his shoulder as well, and it seemed that she was about to put her arms around him as well, but she hesitated, and lightly pushed him away. Harry looked at her, his heart breaking at the thought of never seeing her again, and he finally found the courage to tell her what he had not realized himself for too long.
"I love you Cho Chang! I love you, and I know that you love me too!" Harry shouted. Cho looked at Harry stunned. A brief moment of silence fell between the two, as they sat there in the flood of raindrops. Cho shook her head.
"Goddamn you Harry Potter. How could you do this to me now?" Cho shouted. "It's just too late." She finished. She picked up her steamer trunk, and walked past him, and onto the last car of the train, leaving Harry to sit back down on the bench numb to the cascading water falling on him. He watched the train slowly start to pull out of the station, and then speed up. He sat and watched as the train turned down the hill, he had trouble breathing as the it became smaller, went out of sight for a time behind a hill, and then came around the hill for one last brief view from where he sat, only to disappear one last time behind another hill. And like that, Cho Chang was gone from his life. Harry walked the long path back to the school, the rain covering his tears. There was no one outside anymore they had all been driven in by the foul weather, but he was glad. He didn't want to talk to anyone anyway. But as he walked into the courtyard a lone figure stood in his path. The person did not look to happy to see him at all, and had their wand at the ready for a fight.
"You and I have to have a long talk Harry Potter! Just the two of us, and it's not optional." The person said. Harry gave a great sigh, and nodded.
"Okay, where did you want to talk Beverly Jones?" he asked.
Cho sat in the last seat crying profusely, of the last car of the train, with her head against the window, thankful for the pouring rain that hid the tears in her eyes, and thankful that the rumbling thunder covered the sound of her heart breaking again. How could Harry say that he loves me now? How could he do that to me? I needed to hear that so much sooner. But still… it doesn't matter. I have to get back to mum. I have to stop thinking of my self; I wouldn't have time for Harry anyway… He needs to be with his girlfriend, she can give him the attention that he deserves, that I can't. Cho thought, to herself.
"It just wasn't meant to be. It would never have worked out. I don't love him anymore."she lied to herself. Cho closed her eyes, and tried to blank out every thing that was happening to her, and what would happen to her once she got home. She heard the door slide open to her compartment.
"Treats from the cart? Any cockroach clusters, Crunchy frogs?" the voice of an old woman asked.
"No thanks, I don't want any." Cho said without opening her eyes.
"Well that's good because I didn't bring you treats anyway." The voice said playfully, but it came to a very young girl. Cho looked up in surprise at who the voice had come from. Her face instantly became one of disgust.
"Marietta!" Cho said angrily.
Gee I'm glad it's raining… there's always something to be thankful for
I'm awfully glad it's raining cuz no one sees your teardrops when it pours
And no one knows the thunder is your hear break in disguise
They think the rainy night's what took that sad look in your eyes
I sure am glad it's raining, the gentle rhythm sooths the pain inside
I'm glad the stars aren't shining; a wounded warrior needs a place to hide