The next few nights played out more or less the same way. Elsa would wake Anna up in the middle of the night, check to make sure she was still alive, and then usually get into bed with her. Sometimes she could get Elsa to talk about it, but most of the time she stayed very quiet, silently staring into Anna's eyes as if she was afraid that she would die if she dared to look away from them for so much as a second.
When morning finally came, Elsa would get out of bed and tend to her duties. They never discussed the sleepless nights in the light of day. And to everyone she wasn't close to, Elsa seemed perfectly fine. She remained calm and collected while discussing various things with her council, was all smiles and love whenever she was blessing a marriage or a newborn baby, and was appropriately serious when dealing with the citizens' needs, proposed royal proclamations, trading with the neighboring kingdoms, and all of the other things that made the concept of being queen seem very boring to Anna.
But when she was alone, the pain that Elsa was trying to hide was impossible to ignore. It wasn't anything like the old days, when she would lock herself in her room and Anna could only ever count on seeing her when she needed to leave in order to use the latrine. Instead, Elsa would sometimes sit by herself on a bench in the castle's ballroom, or lay herself down on the grass in the royal garden, staring ahead blankly and getting lost in her own thoughts.
The trick for Anna was deciding when it was appropriate to approach her and when it was best to leave her alone. She valued her relationship with Elsa more than anything else in the world (even the time she spent with Kristoff), but she knew that part of being there for someone meant that you sometimes had to give them space when they needed it. Whatever it was that Elsa was going through, she probably had to work at least some of it out on her own.
Still, she did make an effort to check up on how Elsa was doing during these periods, usually by asking her if there was anything that she needed. It seemed like a good way to potentially start a conversation with her, but most times Elsa would just turn to her, politely smile, and tell her that she was doing fine...even though Anna knew that she wasn't.
She sighed heavily as she put a third tea bag into a cup of boiling hot water one afternoon. Or were you supposed to use four bags? Since she had never attempted making a cup of tea on her own, she had no idea, but it was important to her that she made something nice for Elsa herself, without any help from the castle's staff.
She carefully placed the cup (which was probably way too full) on a tray, laid a few small cookies next to it, and slowly took the tray outside to her sister, who was seated in the garden under a shady tree even though it wasn't a sunny day.
"Hey," said Anna brightly. "I saw you outside here and thought you might like something, so I made you a cup of tea."
Elsa looked at her and raised an eyebrow.
"You made tea for me?" she said. "You do know that we have servants that can do that, right?"
"Yeah, well, I felt like trying it on my own today," said Anna, cautiously lowering the tray onto the grass next to Elsa. "I put honey in there, because I know you like that."
"You didn't remove the tea bags," said Elsa, looking down at the cup uncertainly. "And you used three of them."
"Oh, so you are supposed to use four then?" said Anna, scratching her elbow awkwardly. "I knew I was wrong about something."
Elsa chuckled softly.
"I think one is usually enough," she said, removing the bags from the warm beverage one at a time. "But I suppose that I could use the boost of caffiene right now."
She took a sip and made a face.
"Did you use the whole jar of honey?" she asked her, but she was giggling a bit as she did so.
"I...may have been just a bit excessive with it," Anna admitted as she adjusted her hair a little. "I can make you another if it's too sweet for you"
"It's fine, Anna," she said. "It's the thought that counts."
She took another sip. The smile on her face went away.
"Are you...okay?" Anna asked, hoping that Elsa wouldn't respond by saying that she was and asking her to leave.
Elsa slowly shook her head.
"I'm tired, Anna," she confessed. "I'm very, very tired."
"Because of how you've been sleeping lately?" Anna asked, bringing up the subject in the daytime for the first time since Elsa's dreams began.
Elsa closed her eyes and took a deep breath before answering.
"I've gotten to the point where I'm afraid to even go to sleep," she almost whispered. "I sometimes spend the entire day dreading the night because I know it just means that..."
Anna placed a hand on Elsa's shoulder.
"You're not going to freeze my heart again," she said. "You have control over your powers now. You aren't afraid of them anymore."
"What if it's not just fear I have to worry about?" Elsa asked, picking up one of the tea bags up and absentmindedly twirling it around with her finger. "I mean, we've had three wonderful years together since...what happened, but we are sisters. We are eventually going to have a fight again."
"So what?" said Anna. "Me and Kristoff argue sometimes. It's never pleasant, but we get through it."
"Kristoff doesn't have my powers," said Elsa grimly.
"Elsa, you're not going to hurt me just because you get upset with me," said Anna, hoping that she would believe her.
"You weren't there when those men tried to kill me," said Elsa, sounding ashamed of herself.
"You've told me about that," said Anna. "Those were awful assassins sent to murder you. You acted in self-defense."
"It's not that, Anna," said Elsa, and once again it sounded like she was forcing the words out of herself. "When one of them shot a crossbow at me, I closed my eyes, thinking I was done for...and then a shield of ice defended me. I hadn't even tried to make that happen! After that, it was almost as if...I wasn't myself, Anna. It was like I was acting on some kind of instinct..."
"Well, I'm never going to try to kill you," said Anna simply. "So you're never going to have to get that way with me."
"This isn't a joke, Anna," cried Elsa, and she threw the tea bag she was fiddling with into a small pond in front of her. "What if I actually had killed those men? How would I live with myself?"
"What if you had?" said Anna with a shrug. "In most kingdoms, I'm pretty sure that people who try to kill the queen are hanged. If I were you, I would've at least had them locked up, along with that horrible Duke, but all you did was cut off trade with Weselton."
"Anna..." went Elsa, sounding a bit surprised by her answer.
"Look, all I'm saying is that I wouldn't have judged you," said Anna honestly. "And besides, one of those creeps took the shot at you the instant you put your defenses down. That chandelier that collapsed as a result almost destroyed you, didn't it? They didn't deserve the mercy which you ultimately gave them."
Neither of the girls said anything for a moment. A gentle breeze blew through the garden. Elsa closed her eyes as it went through her beautiful hair, taking the air in like someone who hadn't been outside for years. Anna just watched her. Her normally confident sister looked so vulnerable and helpless right now. If only she knew how to snap her out of this.
"Anna," Elsa said slowly, breaking the silence. "You don't just freeze in my dreams..."
"What do you mean?"
"Well," said Elsa, placing her arms around her shoulders and hugging herself. "Sometimes...I accidentally impale you with a giant icicle. Other times...I send you falling off a cliff and plunging to your death. But, whatever happens, it's always my fault for getting upset about something..."
Anna took Elsa by the chin and turned her face towards her's.
"Look at me," she said. "I can't imagine what you're going through. But you need to remember these are just dreams. I dreamed the other night that I actually ended up marrying Prince Hans, but I know that is never going to happen for real. Just like your nightmares aren't."
She gently rubbed her sister's cheeks, like she was drying invisible tears before they had a chance to come out of Elsa's eyes.
"You're going to get through this," she said. "But you have to let me help you. I don't want...I don't want you to feel like you have to shut me out again."
Elsa picked up one of the cookies from the tray and nibbled on it.
"No, Anna," she said after swallowing. "I would never put you through that again. I owe you that much, at least..."
She stood up and stretched her arms a bit, letting out a small groan as she did so, only to look alarmed once she saw the garden's clock tower.
"I"m late for a meeting," she mumbled. "I'm sorry. I have to go. Th...thank you for the tea."
"Um...you're welcome," said Anna, looking at the almost full cup of tea that Elsa must've taken three sips from at most.
But as she watched her sister hurry off, she noticed she seemed to be struggling with each step she took. Was it exhaustion? An injury that Anna wasn't aware of? Whatever the cause of it was, Elsa was not walking like a woman who was in her early 20's, but like someone who was in the winter years of her life.
"Maybe sitting on that throne so much has made her body a bit stuff," Anna told herself. But she worried that Elsa might be hiding something from her. Her suspicions only increased when she heard the queen loudly cough.