Chapter Thirty- Not me

Tooth was asleep on his couch and James was knocked out cold from a potion he had dropped by accident. In his defense, they weren't exactly thinking clearly. It was supposed to be a varnish but he had grabbed the wrong bottle. Probably on me, since they're all labeled in Russian and I might have-well I did point out the wrong bottle…whoops. At least he's alright. North mused as he finished assembling the shining box. He wouldn't think even think that word. Nope. Not even close. He wouldn't. Couldn't.

Sighing, he sat heavily in his big rolling desk-chair and let his head fall into his hands. He didn't know how they would make it through this, even knowing that they would. You'd think immortality would eventually take the sting out of things like this.

Sadly that just wasn't the case.

He wrapped Tooth in one of the plush blankets he had lying around and waited. When James woke up, and he let him sleep as long as he wanted, they took the long way around to the globe room that bypassed the living room and set it down in its place. It took one simple spell to get Jessica looking like herself again and they settled her into the soft white lining.

Once that was set and the candles were out they stood there a moment, unsure of what to do. Neither wanted to be the one that woke them, and they were definitely not looking forward to it.

"Suppose it is time, maybe we eat first?" North asked quietly, accent coloring the words more than usual.

"Breakfast is never a bad idea." James smiled a smile that almost made it to his eyes before falling flat. Smiling just felt so wrong, almost insulting. North nodded and headed to the living room. When James saw him take that turn he went to wake up Tooth. He figured they needed North more than they needed him at the moment anyway.

North walked in and his feet started to feel like they were made of lead. He could have been swimming in molasses and felt more energized than this. The kids had been asleep long enough that their sinuses had cleared and they looked so peaceful it physically hurt to even think about waking them. Bunny was curled up around Jamie, paws still holding onto him and his nose was twitching quickly. Sandy was the only one awake to notice his entrance which spoke volumes to his friend.

He put a hand on Sandy's small shoulder, still looking at the ground, unable to really focus. Keep it together. Keep. It. Together.

Sandy nodded toward a chair but his friend didn't see. He frowned at North a moment before realizing the problem. He reached out with his magic and let a tendril of gold float around him. North's eyes finally snapped up to Sandy who nodded again toward the chair. He was getting worried about him, he was starting to look too tired. He flashed the symbol for sleep and a clock that spun a couple hours.

Instead of arguing North just nodded and settled down in the chair. When Tooth and James saw a moment later Tooth just hugged her waist, drooping a little more in her flight.

"Come on, let's get breakfast started and let them sleep." James whispered so only Tooth heard. An impressive feat given the semi-alert Pooka sleeping a few feet from them. She nodded and followed him without needing much prodding.

"What are we making?" Tooth asked timidly, fear of nothing that came with the smothering silence causing her to flinch from the sound of her own voice. Her stomach knotted up from it. James wasn't far behind her either.

"Pancakes? Do they all like pancakes?" He asked. Tooth nodded and started getting things together.

"Strawberry for Jack and Sandy, Blueberry for Jamie. North likes chocolate chip and cinnamon for Bunny." She muttered, knowing them like only a mother could. James smiled.

"You know 'em well." He commented. It was about time the silence be broken, if only a little. "Personally I agree with Jack and Sandy, but what's your favorite?" He asked.

"Plain." Was all he got. This isn't her. He reminded himself. This is stress and greif. But knowing why didn't make it less heartbreaking. When the smell of their cooking made it to the livingroom it seemed to weaken the dark spell over its inhabitants.

Jack was the first awake, squirming when his grumbling stomach woke him because of the aroma of fruits and pastries. He sniffed and settled, not attempting to actually move yet, like he was considering the pros and cons. Sandy gave his arm a pat and he seemed to suddenly realize where he was and that there were people there. He looked up at Sandy like he was having trouble processing things.

"Hmm?"

Sandy nodded toward the kitchen. Jack just looked puzzled. James came in and patted North on the shoulder. "Breakfast's ready, wake up." He prodded warmly, handing him a plate and a mug of cocoa. North sat the large breakfast down and rubbed his eyes for a moment, more exhausted than when he had knocked out.

"Thank you." He nodded, not really smiling but his eyes said it all. James nodded knowingly, sitting straight down on the floor at the living room table with his. Phil then came in, helping Tooth carry the rest. (Phil wouldn't let Tooth carry any more than her own.)

She settled down beside James and that closed up the circle. The only ones still napping were Bunny and Jamie. Both were so out cold no one wanted to disturb them, so their breakfasts were sat down in front of them. Jack didn't do anything for a second until Sandy gave his shoulder an encouraging little pat.

He sat up rather lethargically, lacking all the energy that made him…him.

It took a few moments of quiet eating, but soon Bunny's ears started to track them and he blinked himself awake, unintentionally waking Jamie in the process. When Jamie's eyes opened he was confused for a moment. The room was quiet, everyone was eating what looked like an amazing breakfast save Jack who looked like he was just stabbing it lazily with his fork, and Bunny was nearly asleep on him.

He frowned at the room for a moment until the last few days clicked and he felt like something very heavy had hit him on the back. Instead of going for his wonderful looking pancakes he curled back up, hugging his knees and zoning out.

I don't wanna cry anymore, I'm tired of that. Don't…just don't think. Don't think. Jamie urged himself. He thought that maybe if he could just not think about it he could make it better for a moment. He knew it wouldn't work forever, but it would work for now and that was enough. He stayed like that for a while, until the yeti were kind enough to come back and start cleaning up the eaten foods. When they were done Jack and Jamie's plates were still full.

Bunny wrapped an arm around Jamie, rubbing both shoulders as he nuzzled the top of his head. "Come on, mate. Gotta eat somethin', just a little?" He asked quietly. Jamie's head shook almost imperceptibly. He let Bunny pull him closer so he was leaning on him. "Please mate? Just a bit?" He asked again, reaching down and snitching up his plate and fork for him.

At the same time Tooth was trying to entice Jack in much the same way. Jack was leaning on Tooth's shoulder with Sandy on his other side. For once, Sandy wasn't able to talk to Jack and that was scary.

There was a solid day of quiet punctuated only by the sound of sniffles until the service. They held a similar vigil to Sandy's before, except that instead of placing candles on a symbol they had the traditional roses and an actual casket. They had a place to bury her picked out, North and James had decided on it as they prepared everything, but they would still have the service in the globe room.

It started slowly, with only the guardians and Jamie, but soon the seven were surrounded by yeti and elves. Jack and Jamie made it about thirty seconds before they lost it again, and they ended up sitting between James and North. The elves started to ring the bells on their hats and Mani's light started to glow so brightly it looked like daylight.

Then it was brighter than daylight and everyone was shielding their eyes.

Then there was blue magic in the air and Jessica disappeared, a shadow in the moon's light showing her silhouette next to a star.

"Mom?" Jamie almost whimpered. It was a sound that held nothing more than fear.

"Is alright, Jamie." North grinned. "She is with Mani." He offered.

"What does that mean?" He asked pitifully. Jack broke his wide-eyed stare with a small half-smile.

"Think heavin, kiddo. But I've seen this one, and it's beautiful." Jack offered.

"Do…do you think Sophie's with her?" He asked. Jack nodded.

"I know she is bud." Jack offered, ruffling his hair.

The silence shattered. It started with Tooth and James reassuring Jamie who had come out of his stupor to ask questions and it became story time for Jack because of that explanation. Granted it took them a moment to realize what had been said so that happened over dinner, which both boys were thankfully eating. They were a little more subdued, but much, much better. The five adults were relieved.

After dinner and Jack explaining his experiences with Mani's world with Sandy adding his own comments and agreements/differences everyone settled down to sleep. Sandy didn't have any trouble getting everyone to have great dreams that night. Jack returned to sleeping in the most awkward positions imaginable but still stayed close and ended up snuggling Sandy somewhere around midnight from all his squirming.

Bunny had once again curled up around the boy he was rapidly accepting as a baby brother and everyone else picked a couch. That wasn't too inconvenient either, as North's couches tended to rival most beds in softness.

"Take care of her, Mani. She deserves better than she got." Sandy wasn't expecting an answer.

"She is happy, care for her son. Destiny has plans for them."

Obviously Sandy's mind went a mile a minute, but he didn't get another reply. He was going to wake the others and tell them, but there was likely a reason Mani had kept that between them. If he wanted the others to know, he would have told them. Plus, the idea that he could be wrong about his hunch was more than he wanted to think about. If he told Jamie that his mom might come back and she never did…that was a cruel kind of hope.

He decided that he could keep that secret, but there had to be a reason Sandy knew. He wracked his brain trying to figure out why Mani had told him. Maybe it was a safeguard? A just-in-case-something-weird-happens kind of precaution? That had to be it, had to be.

Eventually he ran out of energy and finally decided to let it all go. It would be okay, they would figure it out. In the morning, things would be better. In the morning they would sort things out and maybe be a little less sad. Maybe they'd be able to function. That optimism was what he drifted off too, golden sand still spiraling out a far window of the pole to the other children of the world, and they were vibrant that night.

This is your captain speaking, we have begun our ascent. For once I've accurately predicted when something would happen in my writing! (I'm making this all up as I go, really I'm as surprised as you are.) I can't believe this is the thirtieth chapter! And it just keeps on going! We aren't done yet folks! Not even close! As always let me know what you think!