AN: So, in an attempt to keep myself motivated into continuing to write this now (I just tend to lose motivation after a little while with each story I write, I think it's just how I am—don't worry, I'm NOT abandoning it), I went back and reread the entire story. It felt like it moved a LOT faster than I originally planned (and here I thought my pacing was decent *smacks head against the wall*) and I have come across at least two obvious places that don't mesh and need to be fixed. However, I've come to where I've fallen in love with the characters all over again, and so I'd like to thank people who kept up with the story and who keep getting on my case about finishing it. It helps, a lot.
Now that we're at the last few chapters, I can't help but look back at everything. I've grown a lot while writing this story, and it's kind of amazing as to where it's led. I know it isn't the most popular story ever, but I've enjoyed it, and I think that's what counts.
Anyway, without any further Ado…
xXx
The luxurious suite that made up a good half of the entire top floor of the hotel had a total of five rooms, according to Mandy. The first room, a sitting room of sorts, had furniture and a few side tables they figured they may be able to use. The second was the main bathroom just inside the suite door, something she believed to be fairly spacious from the brief glance she'd gotten when she'd been dragged in, noteworthy but not particularly significant otherwise.
The third had been (in her words) 'an enormous room that shouldn't exist in a hotel.' It consisted of a combination kitchen and dining room. She'd seen a good many windows in the room, at least that's what she'd assumed the many drapes in the room covered, but other than that there wasn't anything significant she remembered about the room except that no one had gone near the table (they had whatever plans they'd been going over laid out on the island in the cooking area instead).
The fourth was the bedroom which held one king-sized bed but had more than enough room for any temporary beds should more people stay in the suite. It also held the walk-in closet that Mandy and Selim had been kept in. The fifth was the bedroom bathroom, a small thing with a stand-up shower only. It had been very useful for them though, as they had been able to generate more than enough light for Selim's shadow usage by simply flipping the light switch.
After giving their message to Mustang, Selim had sent his shadows out in thin, hopefully unnoticeable strips to eat what he could from the other rooms before coming up with a general idea as to what to do.
Now he sat in the corner of the bedroom behind the door figuring that it would be easily overlooked and, if they were lucky, he and Mandy (who had situated herself in the opposite corner) might be able to sneak up on anyone who came in. Breaking out after the grunt Clemin had sent to check on them left had been simple enough. The light had been dimmer than he would have liked, and his shadows had been slow in responding, but they had done the job. Then they'd found the bathroom and any problems with his shadows (with the exception of the ever present fatigue) had practically vanished.
After coming up with a basic plan, he and Mandy had used the bed sheets in the room to dress his gunshot. It had gone through his fore arm and actually wasn't as bad as he'd originally thought. It had more or less grazed his arm at a diagonal, leaving a small gash that went deeper as it traveled up his arm and eventually disappeared under the skin altogether before exiting near his elbow. He was lucky it hadn't hit anything serious, but that was the worst of it. It had obviously clotted quickly and would only cause him a lot of pain when he moved it.
The wound he was more worried about was the one on his shoulder. He'd more or less gotten used to the throbbing it caused and had been able to ignore it for the most part for a while now. Unfortunately, once he took stock, he realized that while the wound hadn't torn open, it definitely wasn't reacting well to all of the abuse. He would have to be careful with it if he wanted to continue to use his arm. Fortunately his other shoulder seemed to be holding up well.
It hadn't been easy to dress the wounds in the dark, but he and Mandy had managed. All of the plants in the room (and what kind of hotel would keep plants in a bedroom, even if he was grateful?) had helped.
Now it was just a matter of either waiting for the General or for Clemin to make some sort of move. He wasn't a hundred percent sure which one he preferred. He knew that he and Mandy had been lucky so far, but once everything hit the fan, it probably wouldn't matter who had started what. He still did not like waiting. He wanted whatever was going to happen to happen as soon as possible, if only so they could get this entire thing over with and put it behind them.
Mandy, he could tell, was a ball of nervous anticipation, just as ready to get out of this mess as he was. Even though he could barely see her over in her corner, he could hear her shifting constantly and rubbing her hands together, or her fingers, or see enough to realize she was twirling a curl in her hair around her finger. In this case, Selim was thankful for that dark because not being able to see all of her nervous movements meant they didn't annoy him as much as they may have otherwise and he really didn't need anything else wearing on his nerves.
As he'd taken to doing lately, he used the downtime to forcefully calm himself down and do some introspection. He'd been a lot more decisive since he'd more or less come to terms with his opposing personalities, and he felt a lot calmer now as well. In all truth, he suspected that the whole conflict hadn't gone away indefinitely (he doubted it ever would) but deciding that he was different and that that was alright, as simple as it sounded, had given him a peace that he doubted he ever could have found as either Pride or Selim. He didn't kill humans anymore, and that was alright. He didn't love the human race as a whole either, and that was alright too. At least for now. He suspected that that would change later—because everything about him seemed to change and grow, either for good or for bad these days—but he was almost looking forward to seeing where this new turn would take him.
For the first time that he could remember, he didn't feel…well, stagnant. This freedom had given him the room he hadn't known he needed to grow into himself. And if this was how humans always felt, then maybe Pride hadn't given them the respect they deserved. He still felt he was a superior being, but that just didn't seem to mean as much as it had before.
A sudden bustle of movement outside drew him out of his thoughts. Across from him, Mandy perked up. They exchanged glances, even though neither could see the other's eyes very well. This was it.
As of right now, the plan consisted of them taking out whoever came into the room. Hopefully there wouldn't be too many people and no one outside would notice. Then again, if either one of those rather undesirable situations happened, they would just keep fighting their way out. It would simply be easier if only one or a few men came in. Just one would actually work very nicely…
Once that had been taken care of, they would analyze the situation but neither one of them wanted to sit there and wait for more people to come. Selim had the idea of using the men who came in as a shield to get out (he may not kill people himself anymore, but he still had little scruples using them to defend himself and his fellow prisoner). Mandy wasn't keen on the idea, but she had allowed him to keep it as a last option. They both hoped it wouldn't be necessary.
Mandy was going to go for something to draw with as soon as they got into the other room, depending on who was in there. She could fight hand to hand, but she was an alchemist and would definitely fare much better if she could bring that particular talent to bear.
Selim had decided to try and go for Clemin, though. He was bound and determined to end that man's threat, and if that meant he had to corner the man, hog-tie him and drag him through several floors of the hotel, then so be it. Actually, he was considering just cutting directly through the floor again. After all, it had worked once already. He just hoped his energy held out.
That was the second thing he would do once they got out. He was going to consume anything he hadn't been able to secretly eat before. The plant energy was better than insects and animals, but it didn't tend to last for very long.
It took them all too long to finally come for the door, and they heard a lot of yells and shouts in the meantime.
One man actually said something loudly enough for Mandy and Selim to hear. "Sir, they're attacking! It seems that we're getting cornered and—"
He cut off as a deeper, far calmer voice interrupted him. It was muffled and neither Selim nor Mandy could hear what was being said, but Selim suspected it had something to do with 'So they don't care about the hostages' lives?' and then some orders to come in and kill them. Well, kill Mandy. Selim was positive Clemin wanted to take the homunculus out himself.
Predictably, several footsteps came their way.
"They're coming," Mandy hissed. Selim didn't bother rolling his eyes at her obvious comment. Instead he focused on the door and prepared his shadows. To his dismay, several people burst through the doorway, each pushing the other as if to encourage them to hurry. Selim and Mandy exchanged glances in the now lighter room, and Selim nodded.
Mandy returned the gesture and peered out of the doorway after the last man charged in. No one had noticed them. She reached out and gently closed the door, causing most of the men to whirl around, but it was too late. Selim had already used the light to create a shadow that cut through the floor beneath them. Half the room collapsed with a loud crash. Several men shot their guns as they fell, drowning out a lot of the other noise, which only worked to Selim and Mandy's advantage. Selim used his shadows to throw one or two of the men he'd missed into the hole, now that there was light coming in from below as well as from under the door.
"Well," Mandy said after a moment, "that was easy."
"Don't say that," Selim said. "It means we missed something. Come on."
They opened the door and peered out. A few men were coming in their direction, but that seemed to be all that was left up here. Selim figured that it was now or never and he didn't even bother trying to hide his shadows as they rushed out and grabbed one by the leg, throwing him against the other two. Mandy had already slipped out and had grabbed...the fire poker?
Selim looked strangely at her for a moment, but then she started to draw with the soot from the nearby fire place, having used the poker to get several ashes without burning herself. He nodded in approval before turning back to the men. There were a few plants he hadn't gotten to, and some that had been too prominent. He sent shadows out for all of them now.
The men on the floor were yelling and trying to move away from each other, but Selim held them down with a few shadows. After a moment, Mandy finished her circle and the men found themselves held down by the floor itself. Selim immediately released his shadows and turned to Mandy.
"Come on, let's—"
He cut off as he heard the cocking of a gun and instinctively dove to the floor. A bullet shot through the air where his head had been not moments before and he rolled to a kneeling position, noting that Mandy had thrown herself behind an armchair. Clemin stood in the doorway to what had to be the kitchen/dining area, gun pointed directly at Selim.
"I should have known," the large man said almost giddily.
Selim glared. "Yes, you should have."
Several more shots met his words and he had to bring up a shadow to block them all. It brought a strange sense of deja vu, but this time would be different. This time, he had his shadows and could defend himself.
"But then again," Clemin said as he pulled another hand gun out from somewhere and pointed it at Selim too, "this is so much more entertaining."
Selim simply stood, keeping a shadowed shield in front of him.
"Can you not see that it is impossible for you to win?" Selim asked condescendingly.
"Selim! Watch out!" Mandy shrieked from behind him. Selim turned in time to see a man jump from the door leading to the bathroom, gun pointed at him, already shooting. He cursed as he jumped back, trying to bring his shadows up quickly enough to block it. He managed just in time.
"You always did underestimate the human intellect!" Clemin cried madly, pulling what looked like a shotgun out from behind the wall next to where he was standing.
Selim's shield grew, but he could already feel it draining his energy. He caught a glimpse of a crackle of blue energy out of the corner of his eye and saw the door to the bedroom become a solid wall. At first he wondered why Mandy had done that, and then realized that this way the men from the floor below wouldn't be able to crawl back up to help their leader and he silently commended her foresight.
Then he went back to focusing on Clemin.
"Perhaps," he said to the man's previous comment, "but I still have a shield that only my brother and sister could break."
And then Mandy shrieked. Selim looked behind him to see where she'd thrown herself to the floor, a bullet having pierced the armchair she'd been crouching behind. Selim scowled. Clemin must have motioned for the other man to attack her. He'd have to expand his shield to—
And then she glared up. "Oh you did not…!" she growled and then finished the circle she'd apparently been working on. The floor and wall next to her thrust out and knocked the man back into the bathroom rather roughly. Right, she was an alchemist and could take care of herself. Sometimes he forgot that, what with her attitude and all.
"I'll take care of him," she said to Selim. "You focus on that jerk."
Selim nodded and heard Clemin growl. He then turned and opened an eye on the outside of his shadow. Sure enough, he was targeting her as she leapt towards the bathroom. Selim shot a shadow out and cut the gun in half. Clemin cursed angrily and fell back into the kitchen. The homunculus went to follow, holding a shield out in front of him in case Clemin found another gun. It proved to be a prudent precaution as more bullets bounced off of it when he turned the corner.
Clemin had fallen back towards a veritable wall of windows and what looked like a door leading to a balcony…and he'd managed to find more guns and a knife of all things. Selim rolled his eyes. Enough was enough.
He mentally ordered his shadows forward and while Clemin managed to duck many of them, he couldn't out maneuver them all. Really, it almost seemed anti-climactic. He pinned the man in the pathetic rip-off of an Amestrian uniform to the wall.
At first, as Selim approached, he thought the man was shaking with fear, but as he got closer, he realized Clemin was laughing. It didn't confuse the homunculus. He'd seen things like this before, when people went mad. He'd actually purposefully driven people to similar points before. He'd suspected for a while that Clemin wasn't all there upstairs. This just lent credence to his hunch.
He shook his head, half in disgust and half…well, he couldn't really identify the other emotion he felt. Regret? No. Sadness? Perhaps, but why would he feel that? No, that wasn't quite right either. And then it hit him. Pity. He pitied the man before him. As Pride he'd never pitied anyone, but this being before him used to be a powerful, ambitious man, and he'd been reduced to this.
"You have me, monster!" he shrieked as he looked down at Selim, eyes wild. "Kill me. Eat me. Do your worst!" And then his chuckles turned into hysterical guffaws.
Selim stared at the man for several seconds. This, he realized, was the kind of man he'd always associated with the word 'monstrous'. That hadn't changed. It took him a moment to realize that for the first time, both sides of him really and utterly agreed with each other. He liked that feeling.
"I'm curious," he finally said. "Could you define 'monster' for me? Someone who turns on their own race for their own selfish reasons or who cares little for how much they hurt others in their ambition? Perhaps someone who enjoys watching others in pain or who kills and sends others to be killed with little remorse? Because that term did apply to me in the past, but it also applied to everyone who agreed to be a part of father's plan. You used to associate with monsters on a regular basis. So why do you think of me as that much worse?"
Well, at least he'd stopped laughing, but his answer was far from calm. "You with your freaky tricks—you who isn't even human! You used people, went back on your word and then ate them! 'Monster' doesn't begin to scratch the surface!"
Selim chuckled mirthlessly. "I do not see how my humanity or lack thereof has anything to do with it."
He smiled softly, unsure as to why he was saying all of this. Is this what pity did to people? No wonder Edward and Alphonse had acted as they had towards him. It seemed to make him want the other man to understand, even though he knew it was impossible—that Clemin was too far gone. Despite that, he would have kept talking, if Clemin hadn't spoken up again.
"Of course it does!" the man growled. "You say everyone in the upper ranks of the military was as much of a monster as you, but you have far more experience than every single one of them combined." Selim wanted to roll his eyes. This was degrading fast, but he was on a roll of sorts.
"Experience is a funny thing," he said thoughtfully, trying to somehow put indefinable ideas into words. "It makes you who you are, and the littlest detail—the smallest piece of knowledge—can change a person. Fifteen years. That's all it took to change me irreparably." He shook his head again and looked up at the frowning man.
"You told me to eat you—to take your life for my own, hoard it inside my philosopher's stone, and use your soul as energy. But you're wrong; I've grown to be so different from what I used to be. I want to gain my own knowledge and experience—I want the freedom to live my life. That is something Pride could never have.
"I doubt anyone would fault me if I did eat you, but I won't because I'm not the monster you remember. I'm not Pride."
A beat of silence fell over the suite for just a moment, seemingly loud in and of itself after all of the noise. Then Clemin snarled.
"Once a monster, always a monster," the man spit back.
Selim raised one eyebrow, unable to help the somewhat incredulous smirk that crossed his face.
"Then, my dear Ex-General, what does that make you?"
He could hear the man grinding his teeth and realized that perhaps he was gloating a little here too. He should probably stop and follow through with his promise to take Clemin to Mustang. "I won't end your existence—won't give you the satisfaction. Let's go. You have an appointment with a Major General."
If looks could kill, Selim would have been lucky to be a pile of ash on the ground. Fortunately they couldn't and he turned his back on the man, taking note of Mandy standing in the doorway and watching him with a small smile. He didn't see a cruel, almost gleeful grin break over Clemin's face.
"Take it."
Selim paused, glancing at the man over his shoulder. "What?"
"Take it now!"
He was about to ask what the ex-general was talking about when another voice cried out.
"SELIM!" And something ran into him just as glass broke. Selim turned to look behind him, barely in time to see the bullet hit Mandy in the neck.
In the background, Clemin laughed.
xXx
Six minutes earlier
Mandy grabbed a handful of soot and leapt over the still struggling men she'd trapped on the floor towards the bathroom. She got there just in time to see the last henchman struggle out of the tub where he'd landed and jumped at him, throwing the soot in his face. He yelled and swore and swung at her, but she ducked under his swings easily and started drawing with her dirty hands on the wall. A simple, four-point circle with the edges extending just outside and—
An angry yell told her the man was coming at her, so she figured that would have to be good enough and ducked again, managing to roll out of the way in the rather spacious room. He hit the wall with a loud thump. She was grateful that he hadn't tried to shoot at her, and then noted the gun on the ground by the bath tub. He must have dropped it when she'd flung him in there.
She saw him turn towards her again but wasn't fast enough. She reached out and touched the circle with both hands, fingertips just barely brushing it, but it was enough. Tendrils of the wood, plaster and paint reformed around him just as he made to rush her again, and that quickly, he ended up as a long-term fixture on the wall, struggling against the transmuted material that held him firmly.
She sighed and slumped against the wall. He continued to thrash about in futility, swearing and yelling at her. She glanced at him as he ranted about how everyone associated with the Military would get what was coming to them and how she was evil…and those were the nice insults.
It only took her a few moments to realize that she wouldn't be getting anything else out of the man and tuned him out. After taking one last look around the room, she grabbed the gun, not wanting it to be anywhere near the man, whether he could move or not. Then, without saying a word to him, she turned on her heel and walked back out the door, making sure to check around the corner to see if the coast was clear first.
Neither Clemin nor Selim were in the sitting room, but she could hear some speaking from the next room over. Cautiously, she slipped over to the doorway leading to the large kitchen/dining area and peeked inside. She was almost jealous (for a second time) of the room she saw. It was lovely, wide and open, with a light décor that reminded her of summer. She'd immediately liked the room when she'd been brought in before and despite the dire situation, hadn't been able to resist looking around. Now as she did so again, she couldn't help but pause for just a moment. Something struck her as wrong.
It only took her a few moments to take in the situation. Selim seemed to have things well in hand, having pinned Clemin to the wall with his shadows, and while he still looked tired, he didn't seem to have any immediate problems, so she took another glance around the room. Then it struck her. Why had they taken down all the drapes? Hadn't they put some up to block any sniper attacks? That's what she'd assumed, at least. It would be so easy for the military to take a shot at him in here.
Actually, why hadn't they? Perhaps this was some sort of recent development? Did the military not have a sniper in place? Had he somehow been recalled? Had something happened? And something else seemed wrong about that thought too…
She glanced back at Selim who seemed to be talking to Clemin.
"Experience is a funny thing," he said thoughtfully and without a touch of menace in his voice. It almost reminded Mandy of the kid she'd met, but also seemed inherently changed somehow—not crueler, just…different. "It makes you who you are, and the littlest detail—the smallest piece of knowledge—can alter a person. Fifteen years. That's all it took to change me irreparably.
"You told me to eat you…." Mandy continued to listen as he talked, curious (despite her wariness) as to what he was saying. "…I want the freedom to live my life. That is something Pride could never have."
What surprised her the most about that was how he spoke of himself, in third person, like he didn't associate with Pride anymore. She wouldn't have expected that of him. It gave her hope that, yes, perhaps he wasn't the Selim she'd gotten to know, but he also wasn't the person that the General had described either. The realization lifted a weight from her heart, especially with his the next words.
"I doubt anyone would fault me if I did eat you, but I won't because I'm not the monster you remember. I'm not Pride."
A beat of silence fell over the suite for just a moment, seemingly loud in and of itself after all of the noise. Then Clemin snarled.
"Once a monster, always a monster," Clemin said caustically.
Selim raised one eyebrow as the tiniest—almost pitying—smirk stole across his face. "Then, my dear Ex-General, what does that make you?"
Mandy giggled softly. He had a point. This man had hurt so many people. She would definitely qualify him as a 'monster'.
"I won't end your existence," Selim continued, sounding resigned, "won't give you the satisfaction. Let's go. You have an appointment with a Major General."
Mandy couldn't help it, her face broke into a wide grin.
The former General looked like he wished to shoot Selim right then and there. Selim turned and caught her eye. To her surprise, he looked relieved to see her. She returned it and glanced over at Clemin one last time. Her own smile vanished as she saw the look that had grown on the older man's face as he glared almost hungrily at Selim's back.
"Take it," he growled, and somehow it clicked in Mandy's mind. This was a set up. That's why he was in here now!
Selim looked over his shoulder at the man in confusion. "What?" And Mandy realized he wouldn't move in time—wouldn't understand.
"Take it now!"
"SELIM!" she screamed, rushing forward almost unconsciously. She couldn't let him die, not after what he'd just said—not after realizing he'd gained the freedom to live his own life.
She ran into him just as glass broke, and then something hit her throat…
xXx
Selim saw the whole thing as if in slow motion. Mandy's head swung back as a hole appeared in her throat. Her momentum from earlier didn't have enough energy behind it to withstand the weapon, and so she staggered to the side and then fell to her hands and knees, gasping. His eyes grew wide. She'd just saved him…from a shot…from a sniper? Falk!
He threw up a shield from the general direction the shot had come from and then fell to his knees, ignoring Clemin's strange mix of laughter and curses.
"Mandy?! Mandy!" There was so much blood…too much blood. He'd seen people bleed out before—had been the cause of it more than once in truth. Falk must have hit an artery. Once an artery was severed, it took minutes (if that) to reach a point of no return. Mandy had to have been incredibly unlucky…and ridiculously stupid. Why had she done that?!
She opened her mouth, trying to gasp through the blood before collapsing to the floor. It probably only took a few (far too precious) seconds for Selim to process the situation. For the first time since he'd regained his memories, he felt genuine fear, not for himself, but for someone he'd come to look up to—someone who had lied to him and manipulated him, yes, but someone who had also stuck her neck out for him more than once; someone who had come to sit in the dark with him twice simply because she knew how much he feared it; someone who had learned who and what he was and hadn't cared—well, hadn't let it drive him away. She'd still trusted him, despite knowing what he'd done—what he still could do; despite witnessing it herself.
And she'd pushed him out of the way. For her actions, she would die in his place. No one had ever done that for him before. Not in 300 years. None of the other homunculi, not his father, not any human he'd come to know.
He realized that he'd heard another crash and then the bullet hitting his shield on the other side, so moving was out of the question. The note processed in his mind, but ultimately it didn't matter at the moment because he didn't dare move her. He made sure to keep Clemin pinned to the wall –the last thing he needed was to forget about that potential threat—but those seconds where he analyzed the situation felt like hours for some reason.
Finally he reached her side and had his hands on the wound, trying to stop the bleeding, before he'd consciously thought about it. He briefly considered using a shadow to stop it, but dismissed the idea almost immediately. He doubted it would have any more affect than his hands were having. If the artery were somehow severed or shot through or whatever, then it would continue to bleed, and he really needed all of the energy he could conserve.
His mind registered that thought and, as he knelt there and watched the puddle of blood grow beneath her, he realized for the first time that he didn't want her—a human—to die. Actually, he would do anything to make sure she didn't die! Anything.
"Mandy! Stay with me! Look at me! Focus!" he snapped his fingers in front of her unfocused eyes, but she didn't seem to hear him. She was dying…and he couldn't do anything about it.
"Mandy!"
Wait, that wasn't quite true. An idea came to him, and he paused for just a moment before glancing around them. They were on the kitchen floor, a hard surface that wouldn't be difficult to scratch into…
There was something he could do—and it may not even work, but if someone wanted something desperately enough…and he could make it happen.
He hesitated for just the briefest second before ordering even more shadows out. He could push himself for this…
But then another thought occurred to him. Could he do what he was contemplating to her as well? She may not live through it...
"Mandy!" he reached down and shook her a little. It seemed to snap her out of the shocked daze she'd gone into and she looked up at him lethargically. "I can save you," he said. "Do you want me to?"
Because he couldn't bring himself to act without getting her permission at least.
xXx
Mandy tried to gasp, but it was hard to breathe. She crumbled to the ground in shock. She'd been shot instead of Selim. Why had she done that? Why had she been so stupid? And yet, she couldn't bring herself to really regret it. She'd just saved the kid that had put her life in danger multiple times—the kid who had once been a monster—and found that she was strangely alright with that.
He was saying something—asking her something, she thought, but all she could hear was Clemin's laugh in the background as she tried and failed to breathe. Why did it sound so wet? And it hurt a lot, but not as much as she would have expected. The room was getting cold…
Then something shook her.
"I can save you!" Selim yelled, and somehow she understood that. "Do you want me to?"
Somehow she knew that wasn't possible and wondered briefly over the fact that her death didn't seem to affect her emotionally.
"You…can't," she finally managed to gasp.
"I can!" he insisted. "You may not like the results though."
She didn't quite get that last one. Her eyelids grew heavy. She needed to rest, just for a second. She knew in the back of her mind that that wasn't good, but she couldn't seem to muster the motivation or energy to do anything about it. Selim seemed to realize what was going on too.
"I'm sorry," he said, sounding more sincere than she'd ever heard him. And then she felt something tear inside of her, forcing something open. If she could have screamed, she would have.
And then everything went white.