Sorry for the wait, I had a bit of writer's block but I managed to power through. Thank you to everyone who has favourited, followed and reviewed!

I know the chapters are somewhat short right now, but they should get longer the further in we get. Soon we will get some present day Regina/Emma interaction!

Just a boatload of angst in this one ;)

Chapter 4

Present Day

Dr Whale let Snow and David in to see Emma the next day, tired of their constant persistence. He thought he might go deaf if he had to hear Snow yelling at him to let her see her daughter once more.

There had been another incident that he didn't want to tell them about however. He'd had to sedate Emma again, and from now on she was going to be watched round the clock, just in case. She wouldn't be conscious when her parents came in, which Whale decided was a good thing. He'd told them it was just to let her body recover, but really it was to save her from herself.

Emma wasn't ready to see her family. Snow and David would be heartbroken and asking all these questions like 'Why' and 'How could you' and 'Henry' and he knew it would be too much for her.

So for now, she was saved from that.

Snow and David went into Emma's room apprehensively. They knew how she had been before this, and guessed she was in pain, both physical and mental. Whale left the three alone together, acknowledging the need for the parents to have time alone with their daughter, trying to comprehend what had happened.

They looked down at their daughter with tears. She looked so broken, so fragile. She was incredibly thin; she had not been eating much if at all for the last month, and Snow and David had been so worried about the therapy and the drinking they hadn't really noticed. Snow berated herself a thousand times over for letting this happen to her child.

They were only allowed in there for a short time. Whale said it was too early for them to see her awake.

When he came to kick them out, surprisingly they went without argument. They went back to the apartment and just held onto each other for hours, sobbing. They hadn't lost their daughter, but they had lost their Emma. And it was going to take a long time to get her back.

Ruby had been watching Henry for the day; he hadn't been allowed to come with them to the hospital. They knew it wasn't really fair, but they didn't think he could quite handle seeing Emma yet and Regina had made no attempt to pick Henry up.

They hadn't heard from her at all. It was as if she had just shut the entire world out.

They were all in their own world of pain; all hoping it had been some sort of dream, yet reality kept coming crashing back.

David and Snow woke up the next day on the couch with their arms around each other and found Henry sitting on the living room table with his arms crossed, meaning business.

"I want to see Emma. Now!" he demanded. His tone displayed that there was no point in fighting him, but they had to make some things clear.

"Ok buddy, but listen," said David, bringing Henry into a hug. "We'll take you to see her, but you need to be ready for what you will come across. Your mom, well, she doesn't look good. She probably won't be awake. She's incredibly thin and frail. I don't want to upset you, but I don't want you to expect that you will see her looking well."

Henry locked gazes with him, determination coming off him in waves.

"I know it will be hard, I know she won't look good but…" he trailed off, before uttering the words that reminded them how young he still was. "She's my mom."

And with that, all argument ended.

They reached the hospital before lunch, and carefully made their way over to Emma's bed. She was asleep, and Whale had expressly told them not to wake her up, or he would make them leave. So for now, she was incapable of responding to her family's tears.

Henry looked down at his birth mother in silence. She looked so thin and fragile. He'd seen her during the month previous, but it had been fairly short after school-type visits. She hadn't come to the house. Not like she used to.

Henry had tried not to be angry with Regina, but he couldn't help it. He knew that it was Regina's fault what was happening to Emma, but she was his mother too. He knew she was in more pain than most being the cause of it, but he could see for himself what her fear had done to Emma. She'd reduced her to hopelessness.

2 and 1/2 months ago

Emma woke up, groggy and her head pounding. She had a brief moment of confusion, and then she remembered what had happened the night before. Suddenly it felt as though her chest was being squeezed, every inch of happiness being taken out.

She stood up, wavering slightly. She'd slept on the couch, falling asleep in her parents' arms. They had wrapped a blanket around her but eventually headed up to bed themselves.

It was fairly early and Emma could tell that David and Snow weren't up yet. She was suddenly determined to go to Regina's house, determined to find an answer to her ridiculous behaviour and try to resolve the throbbing pain in her heart; the one only Regina could fix.

After Emma had exited the house the night before, Regina had stood in shock for a long time. She couldn't really believe what she had done. She wanted to call after Emma, to bring her back and wrap her arms around her, but she couldn't.

She kept telling herself that it was the right decision, that they were both better off this way. After a while, she noticed she was still by the door and headed back to the living room. She took all the fairy lights down, got rid of the food and blankets, and collapsed onto the couch.

The sound of the doorbell being rung furiously roused Regina from her slumber. She knew who it was immediately; only one person rang the bell like that. She opened the door and tried to restrain herself from throwing herself into Emma's arms.

They were both dressed in last night's attire, although thankfully Emma had put on a coat and some sensible shoes as it was still snowing. Something seemed to stir in Regina and all the reasons to end their relationship came fresh running back into her head.

The fear came back. She knew if she let Emma in, there would be no going back, so she simply stood by the door, trying to ignore the pain in her heart.

"Miss Swan," she said coldly. "What do you want?"

Her tone clearly surprised Emma. It did not weaken her resolve, however.

"Gina. Look, we need to talk. Last night was insane. It was ridiculous, it-"

Regina cut her short. "I regret nothing I said," she began, but was stopped by the tears coming into Emma's eyes.

"No," said Emma, shaking her head in disbelief. "You have to regret it. I know you. I know you just freaked out and I am sorry if I scared you. Can't we just talk about it? I'm not going to lose you. I'm going to fight for you. I know how you feel about me. I know how I feel about you. Please let me in." Her voice was desperate, as she well knew, but she wasn't going to lose Regina. Not like this.

Regina's mask of coldness was unmoving. "You need to leave my property. I do not wish to see you again, unless it is dropping Henry off or picking him up. This relationship is at a close. Do not come knocking on my door again. Good day." Regina slammed the door shut in her face.

Emma stood, taken aback. This was not her Regina. This was not her girlfriend. She knew she had been bold saying I love you, but she hadn't expected this reaction. She thought Regina was just freaking out, but it didn't stop the tears once again cascading down her cheeks.

She knocked on the door. "Gina, let me in!" She continued to knock and shout until her hands hurt and her voice was hoarse. She knocked and knocked but no one answered. Eventually she went away, dejected and feeling as though Regina might as well have ripped out her heart and crushed it in front of her.

When she got back to the apartment Snow and David were up and looking worried. They knew where Emma had gone, and her appearance when she returned was enough to tell them what had happened. They didn't say anything, they just held her again while she cried. She eventually drifted into an uneasy sleep, with a puzzled and shocked look on her face.

Regina had heard her knock. She had heard her yell and scream her name. She had heard the sorrow and desperation in every one of Emma's words and knocks.

Regina was weeping on her couch, her heart giving her so much pain it hurt. She wanted Emma back, she wanted Emma so badly, but she was so afraid. She was a coward, she knew. She was being cruel and acting heartless. But she couldn't face it.

If she went any longer, if Emma left her after admitting she loved her, then she knew she wouldn't be able to recover. She didn't want to be hurt by Emma if she couldn't survive without her.

Regina thought, at this moment, that if she stopped it now then she could survive, she could move on. She thought the pain in her heart might subside and that she could avoid future pain.

She just couldn't open herself up to that kind of vulnerability, to depend completely on one person. True, it had been like that with Henry, but she felt fairly secure of him. She knew she would eventually have to let go a little while he went to college or got married. She couldn't handle it if she would have to let Emma go. She didn't want to live a day without her and couldn't risk Emma shattering that happiness.

So she'd ended it before she got too close, before it became too much. She'd ended it before Emma completely held her heart in her hands.

But somehow deep down, Regina knew Emma already did.

Fear and anger motivated Regina. Anything she'd ever loved had been taken from her, even Henry for a little while. She was not going to let that happen again. She would rather be alone forever than have another person she loved be taken from her.

So it was easier to push Emma away, because she hadn't acknowledged she loved her. She had lashed out with anger, knowing that she was hurting Emma, because it was the only way to make Emma stop loving her back.

Regina was only truly convinced by these thoughts for about five minutes, but she let herself be consumed by them, driving everything towards the conviction that she was right. She told herself it was the right thing, that it would soon be over, and that she could forget Emma and Emma could forget her.

She was denying the simple facts that she loved Emma, was loved in return, and that those feelings didn't just go away in a day.

Her stubbornness persisted, but the pain in her heart did not cease.