Chapter 12

Laura looked up when she heard the door. She was expecting either Robbie or Jean. James kicking the door shut while carrying a tea tray was the last thing she expected.

"James, what are you doing?"

James calmly set the tray on the dresser and went about pouring each of them a cup of tea, "I am making us a cup of tea. Apparently it's the thing you do at times like this." He handed her the cup of tea then picked up his. He motioned to the open side of the bed with his head, "Mind if I have a seat?"

She shook her head as she cautiously watched him, "I understand the tea what I don't understand is why you are here with it. Robbie said he was calling Jean."

James took a dainty sip of his tea, "He did. She had too much to drink and called me for a ride. After talking with her I decided that neither is equipped to help you."

Laura laughed. There was nothing else to do. James Hathaway was sitting in her bed drinking tea carrying on the most inane conversation. She cradled the cup he'd given her and laughed at the absurdity of it all.

James watched her. One of the many things he loved about Laura was her ability to smile, even laugh in the face of adversity. He watched as the laughter slowly relaxed her. Her body went from tense, bordering on scared, to comfortable, to serene.

As she finished her tea she studied him, "If you decided they are ill-equipped to help me does it mean you think you are?"

James smiled to himself as he drained the last dregs of tea from his cup, "As a matter of fact, I think I am the only member of our small group that is."

Trying to hide her mirth Laura looked away from James, "And what are your qualifications exactly? I've never known you to have a successful relationship James."

"Precisely, Robbie has only ever loved two women. The sainted Val…" Seeing her expression James held up a hand, "I'm not casting aspersions, if anything it's a compliment. I was his partner for almost ten years. How she never killed him in his sleep is beyond me?" Laura rolled her eyes at James, "And you are the other one. Both of you are far too good for him and make his life too easy."

"And Jean?"

"To my knowledge has only ever loved the elusive Mr. Innocent. And despite whatever might be going on with them these days, it has been mostly a very happy union."

Laura relaxed into the pillows next to James, "And you? What qualifications do you bring to the table?"

He laughed as he set his cup on the nightstand then took Laura's and put it aside, "I bring a whole host of failed relationships, tragic endings and dysfunctional dynamics."

"Dysfunctional dynamics? Such alliteration." Laura's mind wandered to Malcolm and his comment earlier.

"Laura, are you there?"

She shook her head, "Sorry, lost in a memory for a moment?"

"Memories of the ex? Those can be crippling."

Laura rolled her eyes, "And what do you know about crippling memories?"

"Let's see there was the man, who became a woman who seduced me, drugged me and then tried to set me on fire."

Laura exploded with laughter, "I don't mean to laugh James but…"

"When I put it that way?" She continued laughing and he joined her, "The crazy part, that's not even my worst date."

"James, that's not true. It can't be."

"Isn't it? Dying is easy. This living thing is difficult. All of the other women I have cared for have just broken my heart. I sometimes think it might be easier not to care."

Laura leaned back into the pillows next to James. She paused for a moment before resting her head on his shoulder. They lay there staring at the far wall, "What did Robbie tell you?"

James shook his head, "Nothing, I didn't give him the chance. I picked up the tea tray and came right up here. What do you want to tell me?"

"That's a loaded question James. What do you know?" She looked over at him, "Perhaps the better question is how long have you known?"

He continued to look straight ahead, sensing looking at her would make her uneasy, "I've known about your marriage since we had to investigate you. I looked up who Malcolm Tucker was then."

"That must have shocked you?"

Shaking his head he smiled, "Not as much as you would think. I can see it. He's brilliant, abrasive, determined, driven, focused. All qualities that could be used to describe you."

"What else do you know?"

"I know the marriage lasted longer than you led Robbie to believe."

She took a deep breath, exhaling noisily, "On paper only, the marriage was well and truly over within 3 years."

"You were married for fourteen years Laura."

"On paper James, merely on paper. Those last eleven years I was here in Oxford."

"Are divorces not allowed in Oxford?"

She glared at him but he simply looked ahead, "The first year I hoped he might come after me. I held out hope the Malcolm I knew…oh I don't know what I thought. Then it helped keep a few of the more thorough police officers away. I didn't plan on remarrying so I left it go."

"What made you finally go through with it?"

Tears filled her eyes and she smiled as she remembered why she finally sought a divorce, "Robbie came back."

James hid the smile her confession created, "You knew, even then?"

She shook her head, "I don't think I knew, I was just open to the possibility. So I contacted a solicitor and started the process."

"It took another four years?"

"Yes, well that wasn't my fault. Malcolm can be irksome under the best of circumstances."

"He fought the divorce?"

She shook her head, "In a manner, he had terms."

James paused for a moment, "Do you want to discuss those terms?" Laura looked down at her hands clasped in her lap. James cursed to himself, "We don't have to."

"He wanted one last weekend together."

James placed his hands over hers, "You don't have to tell me Laura."

"There's nothing to tell. All I wanted was to be free. If spending a weekend with him, having sex with him was the cost, then I was willing to pay it."

"It didn't happen?"

"We agreed to a time and place, I resigned myself to it."

"What happened, what changed?"

She turned her head to look at him, a harsh laughing escaping, "Believe it or not, those twins kidnapping me happened. Shortly after he showed up on my doorstep, papers in hand. He'd read about what happened and wanted to make sure I was OK. Said he needed to see it for himself. He kissed me, pressed the papers into my hand and walked away. I hadn't seen or heard from him until today."

James thought about what she'd shared with him. Suddenly it all made sense, "All of the stops and starts, almost beginnings only to go nowhere. That wasn't all Robbie was it?"

"No, it wasn't. There were a fair few times when he was ready and I ran away. I was scared. Scared he would find out about Malcolm, of who I was when I was with Malcolm. I was so relieved when he offered me a clean slate. It was like it all went away."

He knew how she felt. He had also found a clean slate with Robbie Lewis, "I thought coming back to Oxford after the accident was your clean slate."

She closed her eyes. Of course James knew about the accident, "You know about the accident?"

"I know about an accident. Everything else is just guesswork."

Her fingers clasped together, the knuckles almost white from the exertion, "Yes, but you're much cleverer than most people so your guesses are better."

"I haven't shared my guesses with anyone, in case you were wondering."

Laura nodded, "I know you haven't, you wouldn't. You would find it dishonorable." She turned to him tears filling her eyes, "I have to tell someone."

He pulled her to him, wrapping her in his arms, "I'll listen if you want but I think you need to tell Robbie."

Laura leaned into James seeking a bit of comfort. Tears fell silently down her cheeks. She marveled at this man who was tenderly holding her, providing her solace. They hadn't always gotten along but when she saw how much he loved Robbie she had fallen a bit in love with him herself. Somewhere over the years he had become as much her family as Robbie.

James tenderly stroked her back. He'd thought Laura an enigma from the first moment he'd met her. When he'd been first forced and then compelled to investigate her the fog had lifted. It was when he realized that she and Robbie belonged together. They were both broken and they needed each other to heal. He'd tried to help them along their way and in so doing had found the family he never knew he needed.

Robbie finished straightening the kitchen. He'd fixed a snack for Jean and himself. They'd both traded turns looking up the stairs curious as to what was happening upstairs.

Jean saw him looking at the stairs again and decided she needed to intervene, "Robbie, why don't I go up and check on them?"

He shook his head, "No I should go."

She touched him gently on the arm, "If Laura was scared earlier she may not be ready to see you. Let me go up."

"You said James was angry with you."

"He is but he cares too much for Laura to show that in front of her when she's this fragile."

Nodding his head he motioned for her to go up. He knew she was right. It killed him that he couldn't be there for Laura but he was grateful for their friends.

Jean climbed the stairs slowly. She'd told Robbie that James wouldn't show anything in front of Laura. But the closer she got to the closed bedroom door the less sure she was. She stood at the door listening, when she couldn't hear anything she slowly turned the doorknob and eased the door open.

She covered her mouth to stifle the gasp. Laura was curled into a ball surrounded by James' lanky frame. They were both sound asleep. Jean watched them sleep struck by how much they had each come to mean to her. Laura had become closer to her than her own sister in the last few years and James was almost a surrogate son. However you defined it they were family.

A noise behind her drew her attention. She was worried that Robbie might be angry. But one look at the expression on his face told her he was feeling much as she was. Family isn't who you share blood with it's who you share your life with. She smiled at Robbie standing in the doorway and motioned for him to leave. He stepped into the room, went into the closet and came out with a blanket. He handed it to Jean and together they covered Laura and James.