Time Doesn't Always Run Straight
Interlude
Please don't be mad but as the tittle suggests this isn't the first chapter of Adam but another Interlude. I was initially going to go straight on to Adam after the previous interlude but then realised I would then have not included anything about Gwen apologising to the team. Because I considered this to be so important I made this interlude. It started very small but then suddenly I needed to include Gwen's thought process to show how she came to the point of apologising. And then I had to show her thinking about Jack and Rhys. And suddenly I had a 3,000+ chapter so it had to be a stand alone. I know there are a number of people who don't like Gwen. I do understand but I ask you to give it a chance. One of my aims of this story has to change Gwen as a character and have her become something more than she was in the show but I felt that couldn't be an overnight change, there needed to be a reason for change. So this is the start of the change to a better Gwen. Thank you again to all the amazing people. For the month of January I had over 650 visitors to this story. So thank you everyone, it is overwhelming.
"Are you sure you're alright alone?" Rhys asks Gwen as he collects his keys. Gwen was having her day off to think about her position at Torchwood and Rhys really wanted to be there for her but he was needed in the office.
"I'll be fine. Go." Gwen encourages Rhys off.
"You let me know if you need me." Rhys tells her before exiting.
"I will." She promises him before shutting the door.
Gwen sighs as she slumps on the couch. Jack's threats had worried her. She realised that he was serious.
She knew she shouldn't have slapped Jestine but she had gotten so angry. Jestine often acted like she knew better than anyone and it annoyed Gwen so much. She wasn't sorry about that. But when she thought of Jack's words regarding her teammates she had to concede he had a point. She knew nothing about them. Was it her fault though? They had never been very forthcoming about their past. Was that because she came off as standoffish or was it them.
She huffs in frustration. This was giving her more questions than answers. She decided she needed to get out of the house. Maybe a change of scenery would help her think.
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After grabbing a coffee Gwen decides to walk around the local park. It would do her some good to see the real again. She had to admit it had been too long since she had been part of the normal world and just maybe she was losing a tiny bit of her humanity.
She smiles politely at the elderly couple that were throwing bread at the ducks at the park. She lets out a giggle at the little girl dressed as a fairy being chased by her brother dressed as a pirate. She glances over at the passionate teenagers that had obviously decided each other's mouths were more interesting than school.
She sits down at one of the benches overlooking the playground, smiling as she watches the children run around and play games. She could easily imagine herself being one of the parents hovering around. Maybe not in the near future but it was definitely something she wanted. But could she with Torchwood. And then there was Jack. Gwen knew she had wrong Rhys so much since joining Torchwood and shouldn't string him along if she didn't love him. But it wasn't that simple. She did love Rhys. It was just she loved Jack too. At least she thought so.
Gwen thought back to Jack since his return. He had changed. He was more closed off but at the same time more open. She couldn't explain it but it seemed Jack was hiding whatever had happened to him during the time he was away. But a barrier had been lifted. He was more open about his past. There were still many mysteries to him but he was letting her in. No. Gwen knew that was wrong. He was letting the team in. Gwen jolted slightly at the realisation. Jack wasn't confiding in her about anything. He was confiding in the team. She mourned silently for the loss. She realised she missed that the most, Jack confiding in her and her alone. Now he relied on Ianto. And she had to accept that.
What she wasn't sure about accepting was that Jack would never be hers. Gwen couldn't deny there was some kind of feelings there for Jack. He was just that kind of guy that would did love. He was charismatic, mysterious and dam sexy. He was the hero. Contrasted to Rhys. Rhys was warm and friendly. Reliable, you could always depend on him. Her mind flashed back to that moment in the warehouse when they had been threatening Rhys. She hadn't thought of anyone else in the moment. It had terrified her to think that Rhys could be killed. In that moment her whole world had stopped. In that moment she had been confronted with what it would be like to live in a world without Rhys. And she had hated it. She knew she would not be able to live without Rhys. And it shocked her. She had lived without Jack. Sure she hadn't liked it but she had survived. Had actually thrived. But even the thought of losing Rhys had been too much for her. She nods to herself as she realises the truth. She would always have a crush on Jack but that could never compare to Rhys. Jack was temptation, that chocolate you tell yourself you can't have. And if you give into that temptation, it was never as satisfactory as you thought it would be. Gwen allows herself to dream of how a relationship with Jack would be. She knew they would be amazing together at the start but as time progressed, how would they change? If she wanted a quiet night, just the two of them, would Jack be able to put her ahead of Torchwood? And children. Would Jack want children? If they did have children, how would they explain Jack? Would they tell the children about Jack never aging? And what would happened when Gwen started aging? She knew Jack wasn't vain but she couldn't help but wonder how they would work when she was 50, 60 or older. Would Jack still love her even when she started looking old? Would she be able to watch herself get older while Jack stayed the same, always youthful while she was sapped of it?
Gwen was becoming troubled when each answer was no. Jack would never put her ahead of Torchwood. Jack probably didn't want children. He probably had dozens out there from previous relationships. He probably didn't want to go through that again. It dawned on Gwen how much pain Jack would face, watching as his children grew and aged and eventually died while he stayed the same. And how could he stay with the same partner for decades knowing the pain was coming. She was shocked as she realised the depth of pain Jack must feel with each person he knew, knowing he would inevitably outlive them. And her own ego couldn't handle the thought of others coming after her, of Jack one day forgetting her completely.
And then there was Rhys. She knew him, knew he would always be there for her. He would love her for her whole life. Rhys wanted a family, would care and love for their children. They could have a normal live, get old together and still love each other. Rhys was the man she could imagine spending her whole life with, not Jack. With a jolt Gwen realised it wasn't actually Jack she wanted, she wanted what he represented. He represented the unknown, a whole new world. But Gwen had seen the world and it wasn't as beautiful as she had thought. She would never give up Torchwood but it no longer held the same shine as it used to. And neither did Jack. The true face of both had been shown to her and they just didn't hold the same allure they once did. But Rhys was still the same man she had met all the way back in college. He hadn't changed, he was actually as he looked.
Gwen's thoughts are startled by a commotion further alone the path. A young man had just knocked over an elderly women. Gwen rushed up. The man was wearing a leather jacket and looked as tough as the weevils that Gwen dealt with. Gwen knew this kind of man, had seen the aftermath of their crimes. She is just about to run over as he leans over. "I'm so so sorry." He tells the women as he offers her a hand. Gwen looks on in shocked. Surely he was going to rob her, not help her up? But Gwen watches as he gently helps the elderly women up. "Let me take you to get check over. I should have been watching where I was going." The man starts babbling slightly, clearly guilty over his actions. The women ensures him that she is fine but still lets him lead her to a park bench and buy her an ice-cream. Gwen feels shameful at having jumped to conclusions so quickly. Again Jack's words from yesterday echoed back to her. Maybe she had been too quick to judge her teammates. Maybe she should have given them more of a chance. She had never changed her opinion on any of them since first meeting them, well besides Ianto. But even that hadn't been positive. Instead of ignoring him she had taken to berating him about Lisa.
Gwen sighed. While she still thought that Jestine got everything that was coming to her, Gwen could recognise that maybe she had been out of line with the others. She accepted that she owed her teammates an apology. Her behaviour towards them had been uncalled for and she hadn't showed them the humanity she was recruited for.
Leaving the park Gwen vowed that she would change. She was happy with Rhys and shouldn't let anything get in the way of that. While there would always be an attraction to Jack, she had to accept that that was all it would ever be. She was happy with Rhys and he was everything she needed. Just had to remind herself that he was what she wanted, despite the new world that had been opened up to her with Torchwood. And she had to start treating her teammates better. While she might never know about their past she had to realise that not everyone had been as lucky as her. Her parents loved her dearly and growing up they had denied her nothing. It was possible that her team mates had not had as much luck and she needed to remember there were different paths to love. None of them thought she had noticed something going on with Tosh and Owen. Sure she hadn't considered it anything serious initially but just maybe she was wrong.
Gwen knew tomorrow would be a new day. Her first step would be to apologise to her teammates. While the apology to Jestine would be a little forced, she would mean the once to Tosh, Owen, Ianto and Jack.
She quickly makes her way to the supermarket. She also had to make things up to Rhys. She had allowed Torchwood to take over and she needed to show him that he was still important.
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"Gwen?" Rhys calls out as he arrives home. He had hoped to get home early but had been swamped with paperwork.
He stands in shock as he views the kitchen bench. Instead of the normal clutter it held two placemats, cutlery, wine and a candle. He turns to look at Gwen who had just removed a roast form the oven.
She breaks into a grin and quickly puts the roast down. She walks around the kitchen bench and pulls Rhys in for a deep kiss.
"Not that I'm complaining, but what's all this?" Rhys asks.
Gwen looks away in embarrassment. "I've been thinking. And I realised that I allowed Torchwood to take over." She raises her hand when Rhys makes to interrupt. "No, it wasn't fair. Torchwood is important but so are you. I don't tell you enough how much I love you."
"You don't need to tell me, I know you love me, just like you know I love you." Rhys replies before pulling Gwen in for another kiss.
Gwen smiles as the kiss breaks. "No more or we will never eat this meal that I've been slaving over for hours."
Rhys chuckles as he sits down to the meal his fiancée had lovingly prepared. He knew they still had a number of issues to resolve but this was definitely a start.
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Gwen takes a deep breath before entering the tourists centre. She knew she couldn't avoid it any longer. She needed to apologise to her teammates and start working on improving her relationship with them.
"Morning." Ianto greets her in the normal manner, giving no indication of what had happened only two days previously.
"Morning." She returns the greeting as he presses the button to let her through. She is surprised when he follows her. Normally he will stay up for half an hour so longer.
"Jack announced yesterday there will be a team meeting as soon as you arrive today." Ianto answers her unspoken question.
Gwen nods nervously. Panic was rushing through her. Maybe Jack had changed her mind and was going to fire her.
"He wants to debrief everyone from the mission." Ianto again answers her silent questions. "He has said he will give you a chance to change, he won't go back on that if you make a go of it."
She nods as they walk towards the boardroom.
"You don't have anything to worry about. He believes in you." Ianto whispers to her before he takes his seat to Jack's right. Gwen sits at the opposite end as Jack for a change. She didn't want to be too close to him for the moment.
"Right, all here. Let's get it started." Jack announces as Owen and Tosh both take a seat.
Gwen frowns. "Where's Jestine?"
Jack sighs before answering. "After you had left Jestine and I had a discussion." He explains. "When things got heated Jestine decided that she wanted a break."
"How long is she gone for?" Gwen asks.
"I don't know." Jack replies honestly. "I said some horrible things to her so she left. We are hoping she will only be gone a few days but we can't know for sure."
"So she might be gone for good?" Gwen isn't sure how to feel. There was no love lost between the two of them but Gwen could see the advantage of having more people on the team.
"We can only hope that once she calms down she will return." Jack states. "Until then we continue on."
He claps his hands together to redirect the conversation. "First. Gwen is on two weeks field restrictions. This means you will be filling in paperwork, helping Ianto around the Hub and co-ordinating any call outs we have. Plus we will be re-doing your training. Your issues on the field are as much my failing as it was yours. I rushed your training through. We were short members but I should have ensured you got the training you needed."
Gwen nods as Jack speaks. While it hurt her pride, she could recognise that the training was done for a reason.
"Ianto will be in charge of your training, as well as Jestine's when she returns."
"Jestine has to do training?" Gwen asks in surprised. She had felt that Jack was letting Jestine getting away with a lot and was pleased that he was putting his foot down to her, if she returned.
Jack nods. "Again, her training was not done properly due to circumstances and it shows. Neither of you will have the normal training as clearly you have more experience as the normal recruit but there are parts that you both need to learn. As well as this you both will be on 6 months probation. This has already been explained to you and we will do the same to Jestine when she returns."
Jack looks to Gwen to see how she was taking the information. It was humbling and a little embarrassing to dressed down like this in front of her teammates but Gwen knew that she deserved it from her behaviour.
"Next point." Jack quickly moves on. "There have been a number of cases of insubordination. This will no longer be tolerated. For the first offence there will be an automatic 2 weeks suspension. Second time will be a month suspension, 6 months probation and retraining. If there is a third incident, the perpetrator will be fired. There will be no arguments, no more chances. Instant dismissal." Jack allows the news sink in.
"Now if no-one else has anything to say I suggest you go back to work." Jack looks around at his team, his eyes lingering on Gwen,
Gwen can feel Jack's eyes on her. She knows he is telling her it is time. She swallows nervously before standing up and clearing her throat. Jack sits down and observes her as the rest of the team turns and looks at her.
"I've realised that I might have said some things that might have been hurtful." Gwen starts.
Owen opens his mouth to comment but Tosh elbows him into silence and gives Gwen a nod of encouragement.
"I didn't think of how my words might have affected any of you and I'm sorry if it hurt you. I know I didn't take the time to get to know any of you properly and I am sorry that I judge you when I didn't know. I promise I will try in future to be a better teammate and person." Gwen flounders.
"Thank you Gwen. While that doesn't take away what you said, it shows us that you realise your mistake and hopefully you won't make it again." Jack saves her. "Now back to work." He dismisses the team.
"Make sure you make an effort and it isn't just words." He whispers to Gwen as he walks past. Gwen nods even though he is already gone. She had made mistakes in the past and still will in the future but she was going to make an effort.
Thank you so much for reading. This was different to what I normally do so please let me know what you thought. First chapter of Adam will be up next Sunday.