Charles Presley, Richard L Jenkins, Ashley Williams, and now Mordin Solus… Jane ground her teeth to keep her emotions at bay, gritting them until an ache started to spread in her jaw. They'd been at this Godforsaken war for so long already and there wasn't an end in sight. She fought back the hopelessness of it all. How many more friends did she have to lose to the Reapers? How much more of her family needed to be stripped from her before this war finally met its end?
Tuchanka was one step forward, and tomorrow they'd take another three back. That was how this war was playing out. No matter how hard they fought, no matter how many races joined together, the Reapers were bigger in size, number, and strength; better in strategy, technology, and mobility. The only hope organic life had was the Catalyst, and they didn't even have a complete blueprint of the damn thing.
How long was she supposed to keep at this old song and dance? As long as it takes, she said to herself, not allowing doubt to reach its black inky fingers into her soul. Too many people were relying on her to win this war. Hell, the whole galaxy was depending on her. After years of bureaucratic bullshit, media cover ups, and the Council outright denying Shepard's multiple warnings about the Reapers as outrageous, the whole damn galaxy was dependant on her contribution to the war effort. She wouldn't let them down, she couldn't.
Standing in front of the memorial wall, Jane reached up to where Mordin's name was inscribed to the metallic plate and felt the cold letters under her fingertips. She'd miss him. The fast pace with which he used to speak, the tirades he'd go on about his scientific studies, the show tunes he'd sing while performing his experiments. Never before had Shepard met a person like Mordin, and never again would she meet his equal. Mordin died a hero, but Jane wished that he hadn't had to die at all.
"The galaxy's lesser without you, old friend," she whispered, before stepping back from the memorial wall and taking in the names of everyone the Normandy had lost. Too many friends were on that wall already, and Shepard couldn't help but wonder how many more would join them.
She tensed at the feeling of someone stepping up behind her. Throwing a glance over her shoulder, Jane found Garrus at her six, where she always trusted him to be. She offered her turian friend a small smile and turned to face him. Before she could address him, Garrus's dual toned voice beat her to the punch.
"Lotta names on that wall."
Looking back at the memorial wall, she released a long, slow exhale and agreed. "Too many."
"What we did on Tachunka, Shepard, it was," Garrus shook his head, mandibles flaring as he searched for the words adequate enough describe the experience. "That cut ran deep and ugly, and you helped start the healing process. The krogan have a real future thanks to you," his steel blue eyes darted to the memorial wall before he added, "And thanks to Mordin."
When Garrus returned his gaze onto Jane there was a brotherly smile on his plated features. "You set things right, like you always do."
"We did that, Garrus." She corrected, refusing to shoulder all of his praise. Jane was only a soldier in this war, to think that she was anything more was foolish. Hoping to lighten the mood of their conversation, Shepard allowed a playful smirk to twist her lips and she crossed her arms in front of her chest before stating, "Just another day at the office, eh Vakarian?"
Chuckling, he nodded in wholehearted agreement. "Reapers and Thresher Maws, it must be Tuesday."
"Not to mention another distressed politician." she added, remembering the message she received from the salarian consulate about Udina.
Brow plates arching with curiosity and intrigue, Garrus admitted, "Liara mentioned that we're headed back to the Citadel," before asking, "What's the problem?"
Shepard shrugged. "Most likely nothing." She'd dealt with more politicians than any one person had any right to, she knew how they worked. This was more than likely just something Udina said or did being blown out of proportion or misinterpreted. It wasn't like she had a soft spot for the human councilor or anything, because she actually despised the man, but politicians had a taste for melodrama and liked to suck Shepard into it whenever they had the chance.
"The salarian councilor thinks that Udina's a security risk and wants to discuss it with me," she explained to her friend, aware that situations like these demanded a certain level of secrecy, and not having it in her to care. Garrus was like a brother to her, they'd been to hell and back. If anyone was going to understand her frustration with the Council and Udina, it would be him. "When it comes to that dirt bag I'd rather be kept in the loop."
"I get it," Garrus agreed with a nod. Silence joined them for a moment and his expression fell a bit. Glancing quickly at the memorial wall one more time, her turian brother in arms said, "You know that you can talk to me. Don't you, Shepard?"
Taken aback by his statement and question, Jane nodded that she not only knew that, but appreciated it as well. "Yeah, Garrus. And thanks for always being there." Offering him a sideways smile, she remembered something else that she wanted to go over with Traynor before stopping by the cockpit. "I should go check in with Joker and EDI. Talk to you later, Garrus."
Nodding, he said, "You know where to find me if you need me, Shepard." and watched as she stepped onto the elevator.
When the doors slid shut before her, Jane let out a heavy sigh. There was this pit in her gut. She'd noticed it first thing in the morning and it had only grown throughout the day. Something terrible was about to happen, she could feel it in her bones. She'd fought in too many battles, survived against the odds on too many separate occasions, to ignore the feeling. Something was going to happen, she only wished that she knew exactly what.
Her thoughts wandered to Kai then, to the night they'd shared together. Ever since leaving him on the Citadel that day, Jane had regretted not getting his contact information. She knew that she probably wouldn't survive this war, and it was unfair and just flat out stupid to start a relationship with someone when they couldn't possibly have a future together. But what was wrong with just fucking?
Leaning back against the cool metal wall, she relished in the feeling of the cold surface seeping through her fatigues. It helped to keep her blood from warming at the memory of that night and the morning after. What they'd done had been more than just fucking, Shepard wished that it was as simple as just sex. But it wasn't. She'd never felt that level of emotional connection with another human being before, especially not one that she didn't even know.
Kai Leng had branded himself into her flesh, and now Jane no longer felt like she was her own person, but that a part of her belonged to him as well. How many times had she used the word 'love' throughout her life? She'd said it to Kaidan, and more recently to Jacob. And, at the time, she'd felt like it was the honest to God truth. But that night with Kai had changed her perspective of the word and, while she wouldn't admit to loving the man, Jane couldn't help but now feel as though she'd been using the word so carelessly before.
Love didn't fit into the equation of her life at the moment. Stress relief through sex, that made perfect sense, but love? No, she didn't have time for it. What did it matter anyway? She wasn't likely to see Kai Leng ever again. Either he'd die by Reaper hands, or she would. Their night together had been perfect, and she was grateful for the memory. That was all that she could allow herself.
The elevator doors slid open and Jane brushed all thoughts of Kai Leng to the back of her mind. They were almost to the Citadel by now. There was work to be done and she couldn't waste her time on daydreams and fantasies of what could've been.
So far everything was going according to plan. C-Sec was disabled, Cerberus was fanning out across the Citadel, and Udina was with the Council. Yes they did have a Spectre escort but Major Kaidan Alenko hardly merited a second thought. He didn't even merit an afterthought. To think that the man was Jane's former lover, he shook his head in disgust at the very thought. Kai couldn't think of anyone less worthy of her.
"I have a visual on the councillors, operative Leng." A voice said into his comm.
"Good." Kai replied, satisfied that, at least for now, everything was going according to plan. He knew to always prepare himself for the worst and, when working a job of this magnitude with this many variables, the worst was chasing his heels like a shadow.
Pressing a finger to the comm. in his ear, he asked, "Are all the Councilors with the Major?" He ground his teeth with the Cerberus soldier's reply.
"That's a negative, Sir. The salarian councilor is missing."
He remembered that the salarian councilor had arranged for a meeting with the Executor. When Cerberus had launched the attack on the Citadel, that was more than likely where she had probably been. While he could send some troops to look for the amphibious bitch, Kai couldn't trust finding her to anyone but himself. If he found her dead, that was one less Councilor to contend with down the road; if she turned up alive, Cerberus' plans proceeded without a misstep. Either way, she needed to be found.
Pressing two fingers to his comm. Kai said, "I'm going to find her. Keep an eye on the Councilors, make sure that they're being herded to the evac point."
"Roger that, Sir."
Abandoning his post atop a building in the Presidium, Kai hurried for the embassies. Cerberus was giving C-Sec one hell of a fight, one that they hadn't been ready for, one that the Citadel was losing. Yet there was still a pit in his stomach, a foreboding that something was about to go wrong. He needed to find the salarian Councilor and get her with the others. Cerberus needed to gain control of the Citadel, and the Illusive Man was counting on him to get it done.
Kai raced down the stairs, in too much of a hurry to bother waiting for the lift to reach the rooftop. The Embassies were only a short sky-car ride away, but an armada of panicked C-Sec officers stood between him and his destination. Once he reached the ground floor of the building Kai removed his ninjaken from its sheath, the blade singing as it was pulled free.
There were three C-Sec officers standing just outside of the building, caught in a firefight against Cerberus troops. They were pinned down, backs to Kai, in the perfect position to meet their end. Twirling the blade in his grasp, a grin inched across his face. These officers posed not even a hint of a challenge, but there was a battle on and the thrill of it filled him with an unshakeable energy.
The doors parted before him, soundless whispers as they pulled apart and he exited from the building. Thunderous gunfire kept the hushed doorway from alerting the C-Sec officers of his approach. Had they heard him they might have stood a semblance of a chance. Kai stepped up behind the closest officer, a turian, dressed in C-Sec blue and protected by a suit of heavy armor.
C-Sec armor was state of the art, military grade, and yet not even it could save the turian from his blade. There was an opening right in the back of the turian's neck that was unshielded, left unprotected and vulnerable to attack. Kai was in the perfect position to strike. Lifting the blade in his grasp he positioned it, and quickly plunged the metal into the turian's neck and down his spine. The officer gurgled, misfiring and dropping his weapon as he died, and still the other officer's hadn't yet noticed Kai's presence among them. Satisfied that he could kill at least one more of them before being noticed, he moved onto the next officer.
The asari was focused on attacking Cerberus troops as he soundlessly approached from behind her. Throwing orbs of blue energy across to where the enemy was positioned, she wasn't paying attention to the predator stalking up behind her. The blue skinned alien didn't have a moment to realize that the true danger wasn't on the other side of the street, but standing directly at her back.
Grabbing her from behind, Kai gripped the asari by the jaw and sharply twisted her neck until he felt the telltale snap that meant she was dead. The last of the officers realized too late that he was the only one left. He turned the gun on Kai, grip trembling as his life was probably flashing before his eyes. With his forearm, Kai swatted the pistol from his grasp, shoving aside the human officer's arm and opening him to attack. The man stumbled back and almost fell over his own feet.
Kai gripped him firmly by the collar of his armor and sheathed his blade with the human's eye socket. He watched as the officer slowly slid off of his sword, leaving behind a trail of blood that mixed with turian's before him. Once his body hit the ground with a thump, a pool of red quickly spreading out beneath him, Kai stepped over the C-Sec officers and into the middle of the street.
A Cerberus shuttle descended, the door yawning open and inviting him to enter. Kai re-sheathed his blade and stepped on board the shuttle. Walking toward the pilot, he instructed, "Take me to the Embassies."
The pilot nodded, accepting his instructions before informing him that, "The Normandy is trying to dock on the Citadel, Operative Leng. A shuttle has entered Citadel air-space."
Shit. Kai scowled at the information, his fists tightening with both outrage and nervousness. If Jane was on the Citadel that meant that this coup could be prejudged as a failure. It was she who had inspired him to pursue larger scale jobs, and it would be her to make sure that he failed.
Taking a seat in the co-pilot's chair, Kai told the pilot to, "Get me to the embassies. Now."
There was still a sliver of hope. Cerberus could still gain control of the Citadel, he just needed to find the salarian councilor. Once he had her, Udina, and the other councilors his mission would be just about done. Victory was so close, Kai could almost taste it. The only obstacle in his way was the fiercest woman in the entire galaxy.
Nervousness started to mass in his throat, suffocating him. This would be the first time seeing each other since their night together. Jane would finally realize who he was and who he worked for. She'd hate him, and that knowledge shouldn't have hurt him as much as it did. They were enemies, they were supposed to hate each other, but all Kai had for Jane was respect, and something else he had yet to identify.
Jane's feelings for him couldn't be important right now. The only thing he could allow himself to focus on was completing this coup and delivering the Citadel to Cerberus.
Jane would never understand Cerberus. The galaxy was at war with sentient robots and Cerberus attacked the Citadel of all places. And for what? What would they gain by controlling the space station? Without the Citadel the whole galaxy risked collapse, a galaxy that Cerberus was a part of. The Illusive Man, and what demented things went on in his head, would never make sense to her.
She stood beside the door, looking at both James and Garrus before giving the marine a curt nod. James punched the holographic panel and the door hissed open. Turning into the room, Jane kept her weapon pointed forward, welcoming any potential attack and let out a breath when they weren't met with resistance.
The only thing in the Executor's office was corpses, and none of those were of the Councilor. Speaking into her omni-tool, Jane contacted Bailey. "Bailey, looks like they got the executor and two salarian body guards."
A sigh sounded from the device on her wrist. Bailey's voice filling the tomb of an office. "Damn. Alright. Keep searching, if you don't see the councilor's body don't count her out yet."
Sounded like a plan. Noticing that James was standing by the window, Jane strode up beside the soldier and peered down at the Embassies below. There was a large conference room table, surrounded by chairs just below the office. Just before her gaze could move elsewhere she noticed a chair roll away from the table, and a shape flicker out from under the surface. The tactical cloak shuddered and the salarian councilor appeared.
Relieved that the counselor had made herself easy to find, Jane quickly reached back out to Bailey. "Found her. She looks unharmed."
"Get her somewhere safe."
That was the plan. She turned away for just a second to talk to her squadmates and was immediately met with their surprised and perplexed faces. Both Garrus and James were staring down at the Councilor, wide eyed and concerned. Jane turned back around to see a figure standing in front of the Councilor, a threatening mein about the man. His intent was murderous, and Jane had to stop him.
She shot the glass and it shattered before her. Throwing herself out the window, she landed the floor a short distance below the office, just as the assassin leaped out of her line of fire and used the councilor as a shield between them. There was something familiar about the way he held himself, even if Jane couldn't get a good look at his face around the salarian councilor's slender frame, she felt like she knew him.
Just as she growled a ferocious, "Don't even think about it." the councilor took a slight step out of the way and Jane's heart leaped into her throat. She stared wide eyed at the black haired man of predominantly Chinese heritage, her jaw falling at the sight of him.
The salarian's fearful voice pulled her out of her surprise. "Shepard, he's going to kill us all!"
Ignoring the councilor, Jane kept her N7 Hurricane trained on Kai Leng. He looked different in his Cerberus garbs. He looked ruthless, merciless. The material hugged him snugly, bringing attention to the strength of his muscles while also pronouncing the lethality of his body. A body that she was intimately familiar with, a body she'd enjoyed so much that it had felt like a life changing experience.
"What the fuck," she whispered, unable to articulate anything beyond her crippling surprise.
Garrus and James stepped up from behind her, having decided to take the long way down instead of the shortcut that Jane had created for herself. At her left, James wondered in that cocksure way of his. "Friend of yours, Shepard?"
She disregarded James's question, and the banter he'd meant to start with it, keeping her narrowed glare on Kai. A smile twitched at the corner of his mouth, the goading kind he'd used at the firing range, and later in his bedroom. That smile had melted her inside before, setting her blood aflame with desire, but now all it managed to do was stab her straight through the heart.
"Jane," the arrogance of his voice was familiar, something she'd been so attracted to before. She'd enjoyed his confidence so much, but now he was speaking as her enemy, that arrogance a challenge to whether or not she could defeat him. "I don't remember inviting you to this party."
Her finger tightened around the trigger, the feeling of betrayal so strong she was half tempted to pull it. She knew the answer to her question before asking it, but she asked it anyway. "What the hell are you doing here, Kai?"
The corner of his mouth tugged upward in that way when he was enjoying a private joke. Making sure to keep the councilor between them, he replied, "Don't you recognize a good old fashioned coup when you see one?"
Emotions flared inside of her, anger, pain, and regret spewing through her like filth and sewage. Kai was a Cerberus operative. She remembered that night at Flux, when they'd asked what the other did for a living. Shepard couldn't even accuse him of lying, because he hadn't been.
Even if he hadn't been straight forward about it, he'd surmised what Cerberus believed itself to be. He'd said that he worked for a private philanthropic organization, and Jane had assumed some sort of nonprofit charity. A terrorist group had been the furthest thing from her mind.
She was an idiot. Jesus fucking Christ, she felt like the biggest fool in the whole galaxy. Shaking her head, she shoved her embarrassment, and the betrayal that she felt, from her mind and returned to the job at hand. Glancing back at James and Garrus, when she returned her attention to Kai it was with the warning, "Three on one, Kai. It's over."
"No," the device on the palm of his hand surged, a grin on his lips as he rebuked, "Now it's fun."
As the last word made it out of his mouth, a weapon appeared at his temple and Kai immediately reacted. It took Jane a second to recognize Thane dancing into the fray, fighting like he'd done months ago, like Kepral's wasn't stealing his every breath before he even took them. Kai and the drell assassin danced a deadly tango. Fists and limbs soared through the air, deflected and dodged as Kai avoided Thane's attacks and Thane anticipated Kai's.
All she could do was watch, weapon pointed at the duo as she waited for an opening. A part of her hoped that Thane would end it quickly. Another, larger part of her hoped that Kai got away so that she could deal with him herself. Jane hated that she still had feelings for him, she despised herself for not caring about the Cerberus emblem emblazoned on his leathers. She still wanted him, still felt for him. There was something wrong with her.
Kai disappeared under his tactical cloak and her team, and Thane, searched for him in the room. When he reappeared it was with sword in hand and he charged Thane down. Her scaled friend ducked under the blade's path, and summoned his biotics with a fist. Throwing Kai clean across the room, Thane retrieved his pistol from where he'd dropped it on the ground and cocked it before aiming at Kai. Shepard's heart missed a beat.
The Cerberus agent kicked himself back onto his feet, swiping his sword back into his grasp. Keeping low to the ground he gave Thane a goading grin and charged the drell down. Not hesitating for even a second, Thane also ran at Kai, shooting at the other man and uncharacteristically missing every shot. Once he was close enough, Thane prepared a fist and launched himself at Kai.
The slushing sound of steel piercing flesh was all she could hear. Jane stared in wide eyed horror at the sight of Kai's sword sticking through Thane's midsection. The blade, coated red with her friend's blood, protruded from Thane's back like a spike before Kai pulled it back out and reclaimed his sword.
Kai looked at her then, the smile on his lips looked forced. He looked like he was trying to maintain his unphasable, cold appearance, as if him killing her friend was of no importance to him. With blade gone from his body and nothing to support his weight, Thane fell forward and Kai Leng made a break for it.
Jane shouted out a mortified, "Thane!" and shot at the fleeing Cerberus assassin. He'd stabbed her friend with a sword. The man she'd been pining over, dreaming about, fantasizing a future with just hacked into one of her closest friends as if it was nothing. Kai was a Cerberus operative, he was her enemy, and Jane had to kill him.
Swallowing back all the emotions that were rioting wildly inside of her. Jane had to get to Kai Leng. If Thane died because of him, he would have to answer to her. She shoved all thoughts to the back of her mind and gave chase. Kai Leng couldn't get away.