The young woman looked batter into skillet heat blankly. That night was difficult, once again, as all last for a week since he left her life. Julia could not drive from her mind the Detective Murdoch. And now that she spent most of her time at home, she had plenty of time to mull over, too.
Taking a new dizziness, Julia closed her eyes for a few seconds. She was tired these days, much more than usual.
-Mom, are you okay? Threw the little voice of Olivia beside her.
She turned her face towards her to look deeply into her blue eyes and she just smiled.
-I'm fine princess, she said, do not worry.
She cut off the gas and put her last pancake on her plate before leaving the kitchen.
-I come back, Julia already launched in the hallway before quickly climbing the stairs to go to the bathroom at a run.
She held on the sink for a second, taken by another nausea and a moment later, she knelt over the toilet bowl. She vomited several times, straightening up again in a sigh of discontent.
-Oh damn, she sighed by placing one of her strands of hair behind her ear, but what do I have? I've never been sick like that.
She closed her eyes, trying to regain possession of her body and forget the disgust she had known for a few minutes. Though she tried to understand what she has, nothing came to her mind, but one thing. Julia opened her eyes suddenly, feeling her heart beat faster. She jumped up and quickly left the room to join her bedroom. She quickly opened the drawer of her small night table and pulled out a notebook. She quickly read the last pages.
-Late, she whispered, two weeks. No, I ... it's not ... possible.
-Mom?
Julia looked up from her book to see her daughter standing in the doorway, apparently worried. When she met her gaze, she realized that she was right. Pregnant. She was pregnant.
Night had fallen on the city for several minutes already. Yet she was not asleep. She could not drive from her mind the idea that was born there. How could she carry in her a child? Olivia's birth had been difficult. Isaac had told her that she could never be pregnant anymore. These years with Darcy trying to prove that her friend was right, she had become sterile. Yet she knew she was right.
Lying in bed, she put her hand to her still flat stomach. How is that possible, she thought. perhaps because the problem did not come from you but from him, made a little voice in her head, you know who is the father of this child Julia, and this is not Darcy. A sob she could not keep, Julia grabbed a pillow and pressed it tightly in her arms, burying her face there to stifle her cries.
-William, sobbed the woman, I need you, I need you so much. I love you, Julia whispered before bursting into tears not noticing the little girl standing in the doorway and simply watched.
She watched the men move hurriedly around her. She was impressed, but she knew she had to be brave. After all, she had left her bedroom at dawn, she had quickly dressed as she could, she walked for long minutes to get here. She should not be going back, she was close to the goal and she could not back out now. When Olivia saw a young man she had already met to approach her, she smiled widely.
-What are you doing here Miss Ogden? Constable Crabtree asked , looking around him, where is your mother?
-Mom is at home, I came to see Detective Murdoch.
-Alone? Retorted George stunned.
-It's for an important purpose.
-I do not think your ...
-I beg you, this is important, it is because of mom.
George did not answer, glancing at the detective's office he saw Murdoch examined a file again. He had to admit that the last two weeks, he had become a shadow of himself and he spent most of his time at work. He understood that something had happened, something he did not want to talk, something that had messed up. He knew it had to do with the young woman he had attended, the one whose daughter was in front of him. He sighed deeply and held out his hand, smiling.
-Follow me Miss Ogden, I will take you to the Detective Murdoch.
Olivia nodded, smiling widely and she followed him obediently to the door of William's office. George gave it two shots and after a brief "yes" from the other side, he opened the door and spoke.
-I'm sorry to bother you but Detective someone wants to interview you, it's urgent.
-Who is this George? William grumbled without looking up from his file.
-Miss Ogden.
Hearing the name William's heart clenched in his chest. He closed his eyes for a moment before speaking again.
-Tell Julia Ogden I am very busy and I can not receive her.
-It's another Miss Ogden, George added.
William then consented to look up to look at him. He saw Olivia immediately next to George.
-Olivia, what ...
-I need to talk to you about mon, this is important.
Detective Murdoch then looked on the open space, but he only saw his colleagues walk there.
-She came alone Sir, George replied, I'll try to contact her mother.
William nodded and his colleague left the room without another word, closing the door behind him. The Detective stood up and headed for the girl who was still motionless in the center of the room but who did not leave his eyes.
-Mom does not know that I came, whispered Olivia, she will be angry.
-Well I think, it's very dangerous what you did Olivia, the way from your house to here is long and there are bad people who could have hurt you. You should not leave home without your mom.
-I know, but it was important.
-I think I understood, William replied laughing softly, so tell me, why did you want to see me?
-The pancakes, mom, she does not cook them the same way. She needs you, that you show her how to do.
-Olivia it is ...
-But it's true ! Retorted the girl in tears, Mom is sad since you left, she plays with me, she tells me stories and cooked, but it's not the same. She cries when she thinks I do not see her. But I see that she misses you. Come home with us, please.
-Olivia I can not.
-But you love my mom, right?
William stood there in front of her, seeing her huge blue eyes full of tears. He could not resist the sight, his heart was breaking into pieces. He then pressed his lips together and put one knee on the floor, placing his hands on the waist of the girl to anchor his gaze deep into hers.
-I love her infinitely Olivia, and you too, but the stories of adults are very complicated. I can not come and live with you and your mom. I can not make pancakes every day with you.
-Why? Olivia sobbed.
-Because I'm not your dad.
-Darcy either he was not my dad. My dad he will never return, I know. But you could pretend you were my dad. Well then, if you love us, it's as if you were.
-But it is not enough to just love. Although I do not know you lot, I know you're one of the two most important people to me and your mom is the other. But you know, you have your mom loves me back and want me to be part of your life.
-But she loves you, I heard her say it, so why can not you be my daddy?
-You will understand later Olivia, William replied, stroking her cheek to wipe away a tear, it's complicated.
He smiled tenderly and before he had time to say or do anything at all, she curled up in his arms for a tender embrace.
-Me, I will always love you William.
He just smiled and tightened his grip around her, savoring the moment when he held the girl in his arms, that he loved as his own child. They stayed entwined before the door opens on the fly and make them jump at the same time. Julia went bang and William separated immediately from the girl who threw herself into her mother's arms.
-Oooh Dear God Olivia, Julia sighed with relief, taking her in her arms, I was worried sick, you went for three hours. I searched the whole neighborhood and I called the police. Do you realize what you did?
-I'm sorry mom, Olivia stammered, looking down, I do not mean to scare you.
-But why did you left home without telling me and to where?
Olivia looked up at William. It was enough for Julia to do the same and meet his eyes. As was the case every time, her heart swelled with love for him and she felt that infinite fullness.
-I wanted to tell William that you missed him and that you were sad. I asked him to come with us but ... but he said it was complicated.
Julia left William eyes to look toward Olivia and take her in her arms again.
-Do not never do it again my sweetheart I beg you.
-I promise mom.
They remained entwined minutes before separating. Julia turned once again to William before asking Olivia to wait a few minutes outside. She nodded and immediately and the young woman saw her sitting at the desk of Constable George Crabtree who could not resist the urge to offer her a piece of chocolate.
-I am sorry that she bothered you, Julia murmured, looking at the ground, it will not happen again.
William nodded and looked into hers which led her to speak again.
-William I ... I know it's all a bit complicated between us and that you think everything has been said but I ... I'd like to see you just once. I ... I need to talk to you.
-I do not know if...
-I beg you, Julia whispered taking his hand, it's important, I have to talk to you. I leave you the time it takes you, you only have to contact me when you're ready ... but do it to, please.
He did not answer and she approached him to hug him. He did not react at first, before putting his hands in the small of her back and close his eyes plunging his face into her neck. This simple gesture he loved was terribly missed him, she had missed him terribly. Julia rested her cheek against his and she just closed her eyes, savoring the touch of his body pressed against hers. If only he knew he also pressed against him the child growing inside her, if only she could tell him that this was the fruit of their love, the proof that she loved him with an infinite love. If only you knew William, thought Julia. She felt his warmth, his scent and nothing more was enough to appease. Yet, against heart she moved away from him breaking the embrace, she met his gaze, she smiled at him and without a word, she left him, dropping his hand at the last moment to leave the room and the police station with her daughter.
to be continued ...