Chapter 12 – Settling In & Secrecy

"Hey boss," Van Pelt said as she met Lisbon in the hospital corridor. "Just heading back to the office. Dropped off some puzzles for Jane while he's staying with you. I figure it'll give you a few hours of peace and quiet where you won't have to worry about him."

"Thanks, Grace," Lisbon smiled as she went to go past her.

Before she got too far Van Pelt touched her arm. "Um...boss?" She nibbled her lower lip and her eyes darted left then right.

"What is it?" Lisbon replied, putting on a cheery disposition but knowing only too well what this was about.

"I know we haven't had much time to talk over the last few days but...the cure...where did you get it?"

Lisbon blinked rapidly but said nothing for a moment.

It was enough for Van Pelt to get confirmation. "He gave it to you? Red John!" she whispered.

Lisbon nodded mutely.

Van Pelt was flabbergasted for a moment. "Jane doesn't know obviously. He hasn't mentioned it at all. Seems more concerned with teasing me about Rigsby."

Lisbon nodded again. "No, he doesn't know. Not yet. But...I will tell him. I just want to get him back on his feet first. You won't say anything?"

Van Pelt shook her head. "No, of course not. Rigsby and Cho...well they're asking questions about it too."

"Okay, I'll talk to them about it. Can you ask them to keep quiet until then? Just until he's better to take in the news."

"Sure. But what happened? Did you meet him? Do you know who he is?"

Lisbon shook her head and told her about her encounter at the cemetery, sticking to the facts of how she got her hands on the cure and leaving out the parts where he had taunted her about Jane's feelings towards her.

"Where did he get it?"

"He wouldn't say. You've been at the office more than I have over the past few days. Has anything come across the wire? Any suspicious deaths that could be related?"

Van Pelt shook her head. "No but I'm going back there now and I'll check again, let you know."

"Thanks, Grace and...thanks for your help."

"I'm just glad it all worked out," the redhead smiled as she took her leave.

Alone in the corridor again Lisbon muttered under her breath, "I hope you're right," as a cold shiver ran down her spine.

She talked to Rigsby and Cho later that day. Rigsby looked nervous into voicing his opinion but she noticed the anxiety etched all over his face. "I will tell him, Wayne," she emphasised again.

"Okay, boss...but you know what Jane's like. He hates being lied to. Has no problem if he's the one doing the lying but it's a different story the other way round. And what if he blatantly asks the question? He'll know I know something and wheedle it out of me."

"I don't think he'll ask you directly. If he does then tell him to talk to me and I'll deal with it. I'll tell him as soon as he's ready to hear it. I don't want his recovery put back before then."

Cho stared at her, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Cho, you okay with this?" she asked, a little nervousness to her tone at her lead agent.

"You're making a mistake. Bad enough you went to Red John for him even if it did save his life. Worse if you keep this from him now."

"It's only for a little while-"

"It better be," Cho replied quickly. "Or he might never trust you again. Or us."

As Lisbon rode the elevator to her office floor she reflected on the evening before. Having dinner with Walter had been a nice way to end a pretty turbulent day. And illuminating if there was any truth to his theory about Jane's involvement with Janet Walker. Or perhaps that should be lack of involvement. She had ruminated on the possibility after she'd gone home, replayed the conversation she'd had with Jane when she first saw him in the interrogation room in San Francisco. When he'd taunted her to confirm if they were lovers. 'When the occasion arose' he had replied. She'd pounded the pillow behind her with her fist when she thought of those words as her temper rose, unable to sleep. Now she thought about it some more, the statement was clearly ambiguous and she should have seen that at the time.

She had woken up with the intention of dragging him into her office to confirm it one way or another. To beat him into telling her what the hell had been going on with this woman if she had to. To call him out on his lie. If it was a lie. But as she'd driven to work she had decided to play the long game instead. At the moment the way things stood between them she was uncertain if he would simply clam up on the matter or misdirect her entirely. It was sometimes better to keep your cards hidden. She smiled lightly at the irony. Perhaps Patrick Jane had taught her a few tricks over the years.

As she reached her office she found a huge display of yellow roses adorning a side table. She rolled her eyes and blushed instantly, plucking the card from its holder but not really having to read it to know who they were from.

Teresa, yellow roses are meant to signify friendship. Or a promise of a new beginning. I know which I'd rather but I'll settle for the former if I really have to.

Keep Saturday night free. I promise you won't regret it.

WM.

Over dinner the night before Walter had flirted with her outrageously and she had found herself liking the attention. She was used to being so in control, so independent her whole life she had never let her guard down with anyone, especially men she dated. Even when she had spent the night with Walter a couple of years before she had kept to that rule, passionate between the sheets certainly but no thoughts in her head to let him worm his way into her heart. Of course, even though she would have denied it at the time, the space there was already occupied by someone else who had moved in unbidden.

Then she and Jane had started up their relationship/love affair/whatever the hell it was. He'd continued to make her drop her guard day by day, a process he'd started from the first time they'd met. He'd shared intimacies of his own life, often whispered in darkness under cover and she had done the same. It always seemed easier that way for both of them to open up, safer cocooned together under soft sheets with just the moonlight to illuminate their naked skin, fingertips brushing over each other's arms and backs as they relived painful memories, soft kisses and gentle caresses to comfort.

And so she'd grown accustomed to the affection, the touches, and the closeness with another person. She'd never felt anything like it in her life and it terrified her and delighted her in equal measure. When he left she had felt adrift and abandoned, suddenly starved of what she had just got used to. She cried every night for the first week. Then she'd gotten angry. With Jane. With herself. With Red John. Like a cycle she turned her anger to each in turn at least ten times a day until she couldn't feel it any longer, exhaustion filling its place instead. That went on until the end of week two. After that she had gotten back into her routine again. Running in the morning. Working every case she could get her hands on. Rebuilding her team into a cohesive unit again without Jane while rebuilding her own walls at the same time.

But she still missed the affection and sharing a meal with Walter had allowed her to feel that again, just a little. To be in the company of a man she knew and was comfortable with, who smiled when he talked to her, who was interested in what she had to say. She'd even flirted back on a few occasions although she had made it clear that there was no hope of anything more than that happening between them again. He hadn't seemed to mind that that was the case and she had relaxed in his company even more with that knowledge. In some ways it made her think of dinners with Jane before they'd become lovers. Some fun, some flirting and some laughs as they discussed a current case. It was only when she got home that she had cried, a part of her wishing she had been to dinner with Jane instead and that she could turn the clock back and change the decision she made for their friendship to turn romantic. Maybe then they could have salvaged something from this whole mess. She put the card in the bin and sighed loudly, sitting at her desk and opening a file in front of her. She stiffened her shoulders, ifs and maybes weren't going to change things now and time didn't run backwards.

Rigsby and Cho came to help move Jane's clothes from his Motel to her condo and Lisbon put his suits in her spare room wardrobe. It was strangely intimate doing so and she slammed the door shut as her pulse raced. She had already counted the steps from her living room to the bedroom. Sixteen. Good enough even if he had to stop once on the way to catch his breath. Bathroom was upstairs too so at least he wouldn't have to make the journey during the night. The night before he was released she had cleaned the place for six hours straight in a frenzy to both satisfy Jane's penchant for neatness and ensure there was no chance of him catching a cold due to dust mites. And to stop thinking about when she would tell him the truth about his miraculous cure. She'd stocked up on healthy food and a supply of herbal tea. As she had a cup at two am she looked around her living room. She tilted her head. At least his visit had one advantage; it had never been cleaner or tidier. As she settled back on the couch she thought about telling him about what Red John did. Of course she didn't exactly know what he had done to acquire the cure. Van Pelt's investigations into any possible links had drawn a blank so far. But Cho was right. She should tell him what she knew and what she did sooner rather than later. Once he was back to full health she resolved to do just that.

"Ah, my warden arrives to release me at last!" Jane beamed as Lisbon shuffled into the hospital room. He was dressed in his three piece suit minus his jacket that was lying over the bed and she couldn't help but smile seeing him look like his old self again. He was still pale and she could tell he was a little breathless as he was packing a bag but it was a hell of a lot better than what she'd witnessed over the past week.

"Yeah, well just remember you're still on parole," she deadpanned, coming over to shove some toiletries into his wash bag. "You'll be back here if you don't do as you're told."

"You really can't wait to begin looking after me, can you, Lisbon?" he grinned.

Making sure not to look at him but busying herself with checking the bathroom she replied, "I think the hospital staff have suffered enough. Now it's my time to make you suffer. I have a lot of years to make up for."

She glanced at him with a smile at the end of the sentence and he narrowed his eyes at her. "Stop pretending that you're looking forward to bossing me about. We both know you'll be fussing over me in no time."

"Yeah, in your dreams," she shot back.

As she got him home he waved off her help up to walk up her drive and made his way over to her couch, exhaling a loud sigh as he sat down. "I've never smoked a day in my life and I feel like I'm a sixty a day man," he said, puffing out a breath to help him breathe easier.

As she went to the adjoining kitchen to make him tea he called to her, "So, been doing a little spring cleaning in anticipation of us being roommates? Now I know how much you care, deny it all you like."

She could imagine the smile as he said the words.

Ignoring his remark she pushed the mug into his hand and glared at him. He grinned in return. Picking up the remote control he turned the TV on and toed off his shoes, putting his feet up on the couch. He sipped the tea and closed his eyes, sighing happily as he wiggled his toes.

"So why is being here any different to the hospital? You're doing exactly the same here as you would do there. Lying about and watching TV," she asked as she stood in front of her coffee table that sat in front of the couch.

He smiled softly at her and spoke gently. "Because you don't live at the hospital."

He immediately went back to channel hopping but with a slight smirk on his lips as her face flamed, her mouth open. They hadn't repeated the kiss or spoken about his declaration of moving their relationship forward over the past couple of days but it had just sounded like his feelings on the matter hadn't changed.

She eventually stammered, "I'm going back to the office for a couple of hours but I'll be home as early as I can to make us dinner."

Still focussed on the TV he grinned, "Okay. You know you'll make someone a great housewife one day, Lisbon. This will be great training for you, attending to my needs."

She picked up a cushion from the chair beside her and threw it at him in response. "When I'm gone, no snooping around my place."

He moved the cushion behind his back and looked at her with indignation. "Of course not! This is your home, Lisbon, your sanctuary. I understand that completely." He paused and added, smiling, "Besides, I don't have to snoop to know your secrets, I know them all already," he winked, his eyes flicking back to the screen.

She turned her back to him as her smile dropped. For once in his life Patrick Jane was wrong.

A/N: This turned into a bit of a setting up chapter but there will be plenty of grumpy, happy, jealous and sweet Jane (obviously not all in the same timeline!) next chapter. And some fun both past and present. Hope you enjoyed this one nonetheless. Thanks.