15/07/04

One thing I forgot to mention in my last entry was that Clarisse and I had children…well technically as the result of our dogs being in love, they had puppies. I woke up late one night and heard my dog squealing, so I turned on the lamp, looked over at Chloe and Maurice's dog bed and was shocked to see these tiny little blobs of goo coming out of her rear. I wiped my eyes and realised she was giving birth. It was a strange thing to witness, as I thought both dogs had been de-sexed, but obviously they hadn't been. I did notice Chloe had been getting fatter, but I put it down to over-feeding, which obviously wasn't the case. Anyway, Maurice started barking, which woke Clarisse up, who became annoyed and threw her pillow at him. She missed though and buried her head into my shoulder moaning, "Make him stop, Joseph…"

Sitting up I whispered, "Clarisse, I think we just became grandparents."

"Mmm…what are you talking about?"

"Chloe's giving birth."

Her voice was drowsy, "Hmm…that's nice."

Her arm slid around my stomach, then she snapped awake, "What!"

Struggling to sit up, she looked over to the dog bed and shouted, "Oh my goodness!"

So we sat together and watched the 'miracle of birth', which was actually quite disgusting, but nevertheless interesting. I wrapped the seven little newborn puppies in my old shirts, because Clarisse didn't want to touch them, and we smiled at each other wondering what would happen to the puppies later on.

Eventually we decided to give the puppies away, Clarisse wanted to give them to old people, but since I've seen how old people treat pets, we gave them to sick children in need of company. Oh and Sammy wanted one for the kids, so they got one, too. Three days later, Maurice and Chloe were de-sexed. For a while there was a speculation about our dogs, which led to speculation about us. In the papers once, there were headlines that read something like, 'Who's Woofing Who?' And it had two photos beneath it, one of Clarisse and I, one of Maurice and Chloe. Clarisse thought it was all rather pathetic because I never consent to sleep with her anyway, which for some reason she doesn't mind.

Charlotte is taking care of my dog while I'm in America, I would have asked Clarisse to, but she can't even feed her own dog, let alone mine as well. I really wish she could have come on this trip with me, but as she said, it's only three days. Three days for me is far too long to spend away from her, she's practically my life. I'm not going to like it when we come back because Clarisse totally avoids me when Mia's around. The past two times Mia came was understandable because we'd already been avoiding each other anyway on a regular basis on account of not being together.

I hope she doesn't avoid me this time.

Princess Amelia is currently at a graduation party that absolutely must take place tonight, as she graduates tomorrow and then we leave straight after. I haven't had a chance to talk properly to her yet, but there's plenty of time for that on tomorrow's flight.

16/07/04

Congratulations are in order for Her Royal Highness Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi Princess of Genovia, who just graduated from college and is on her way back to Genovia to take her place as queen…eventually. I watched the ceremony and I watched her walk onstage to collect her diploma. Afterwards I had to escort her to the plane so she had to say a quick goodbye to everyone and we were off.

We shared a bottle of champagne to celebrate and then she went all quiet. I asked her what the problem was and she said, "Michael and I broke up last month."

I replied with, "I'm so sorry, princess. Might I ask why?"

She shrugged her shoulders, "Well we kinda grew apart last year when he was on tour and he said that since I'm going to rule Genovia I won't need him, there's no place for him there."

I had to think of something re-assuring to say to her, so I said, "He mustn't have been the right one for you, I'm sure you'll find someone else."

"But I really thought he was the one. He and I got along great before we slept together, then everything was just different and him being on tour didn't help."

I was a bit shocked to hear her admit that she slept with him before marriage, she's more like Clarisse than I thought, "So you're sad about losing him?"

"The funny thing is, I'm not that sad, I'm just curious as to what the difference between love and friendship is. I actually thought I was in love with Michael."

"I wouldn't worry about it too much, princess, high school romances never last."

"Then what does?"

I paused for a moment and patted her on the knee, "When love comes, you'll know."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because I've been there myself. You'll know when it comes."

"Thanks, Joe. Speaking of love, how are you and Grandma going? Still together? I've noticed you two seem a bit distant towards each other the last couple of times I've been to Genovia."

My eyebrows hit the roof – she still remembers about us?

I spoke slowly, "Mia, your grandmother and I broke up."

What? It's the truth! Sure I may have left out the part where we got back together, but it's the truth. If Clarisse found out I'd been talking about her behind her back, she'd crack it.

"That's too bad, Joe. Was she not the right one for you?"

"Princess, I really don't want to talk about it."

"I understand. So how is grandma if you don't mind me asking?"

"She's well."

Mia and I talked for a while on different subjects before she decided to write up her journal. I felt quite tired, but decided to write in mine too, which is what I'm doing now. I think we just flew over the Genovian border, so should be landing soon. I'm not looking forward to the night after tomorrow, there's another ball - Mia's birthday ball. I gave Mia her present already incase I don't get to give it to her later. I bought her a pretty little necklace I picked up at the Genovian Jeweller for $450. It's sort of like a heart made of diamonds on a gold chain - she loved it - obviously she isn't as fussy when it comes to jewellery as her grandmother is.

Well, since the plane is about to land now, I'm going to sign off and inform the princess of our arrival.

Later…

After a long evening of watching Mia catch up with her grandmother, she finally left her alone and I entered the suite. Wrapping my arms around Clarisse's waist, I lifted her off the ground in excitement. She smiled and touched my forehead with hers, then allowed her lips to press against mine. Her scent was beautiful, intoxicating as always. Closing my eyes I deepened our kiss and pulled her over to the bed, laying her down and opening my eyes to look at her. Our lips broke apart long enough for me to say, "I missed you."

And for her to say, "I gathered that."

We kissed for about ten minutes and became exhausted, or rather tired since it was 12am and I didn't get any sleep on the plane. It was nice to be able to kiss her mouth and body, it was nice to just simply be there stroking her hair. I missed her so much.

17/7/04

Mia seems to be less depressed about this thing with Michael, which is good because it's her birthday ball tomorrow and she should be happy about being 21. I'm happy to have her here in Genovia, she's fun to talk to - she and I have some kind of an understanding of each other.

Clarisse cracked it with me just before. On my usual trip to see her this evening, I found her in her suite wearing tomorrow night's long pink spaghetti strapped dress. She was standing in front of the three mirrors in her change room staring at herself in horror. She turned around and started shouting at me, "Look what you've done!"

I didn't know what she was on about at the time, so I replied with, "What?"

"My dress! Look at my dress!"

"It looks fine. I've told you before that you're the only one who can see the invisible creases you're always going on about."

She gave me a funny look, "I'm not talking about creases, I'm talking about this!"

Pointing to her upper self, she raised her voice, "This!"

Finally I noticed what she was talking about. Red love-bites made last night by yours truly covered her chest, every inch of it.

I tried to contain my laughter, "I think it looks lovely."

She put her hands on her hips and stared at me, "Joseph, for once in your life will you please be serious? I am in a crisis caused by your bad sense of direction! What am I going to do about this?"

I noticed a bowl of toffees sitting on a nearby table and picked one up, "You could wear a different dress."

She snatched the toffee out of my hand and pointed it at me, "I can't wear a different dress, I've had this one picked out for weeks."

"Oh well then, I guess you'll have to umm…cover it up or something."

"Cover it up? Cover it up? How am I supposed to cover this up?"

Taking the toffee back from her and eating it, I replied, "Use your imagination. Personally I don't think it looks that bad, it's a symbol of my love for you."

She rolled her eyes and walked away from me, I sat on her couch with the toffee bowl and ate them until she came back and snatched them from me, "Why are you eating these? They're for Mia. I can't have her getting pregnant to that boyfriend of hers."

I stopped chewing immediately realising that the white center of the toffees were birth control pills, I spat them out, "I don't think you have to worry about him, Clarisse."

"Why, is he not coming?"

"They're not together anymore."

"Really? How do you know?"

"We talked."

She gave me a curious look and said, "You seem to know an awful lot about my granddaughter that I don't, is there something I should know?"

I have no idea what she meant by that, perhaps she's feeling jealous that I know Mia better than she does? I don't know.

I wonder what Clarisse is going to do about that dress of hers. I suppose she could pin it up so it covers her chest, or she could cover herself in foundation. It's a funny really, I seem to always interfere with her choice of gown.

18/7/04

The night of Princess Mia's Birthday bash…

What can I say about it? Clarisse didn't feel much like dancing because she stubbed her toe on a doorframe this morning, so I was left without a dance partner. She had something clever done to her dress to cover up the love-marks – pretty sparkling material draped over her shoulders and clasped at the back. I nodded my approval when she walked – half an hour late – into the foyer and held out her hand. She looked so beautiful. I kissed her hand told her she looked beautiful – she loves compliments.

Since she and I weren't dancing I had a chance to look around the party, I saw Mia "dancing" with lots of different men. It was amusing, as half of them were really bad dancers and didn't suit her at all. She must have been having a terrible time. There was one particular man who wasn't at all bad at dancing, in fact he was quite good and from the angle I was watching them at I'd say she's already forgetting about Michael.

The man Mia was dancing with looked somewhat familiar to me, but I couldn't quite place a name to the face. I asked Charlotte if she knew who he was, but she didn't, she just excused herself and ran to the bathroom. That Charlotte sure has been acting weirdly lately, I have a sneaking suspicion she may be pregnant, but I don't even think she has a boyfriend. Well I'm sure if she is pregnant, I'll be the first to know about it. She shares everything with me.

After the party Clarisse informed me of a new intern for the holidays, unfortunately that person happens to be Lionel, the Prime Minister's nephew. Why is it a bad thing might you ask? Because he's like a leech, never leaves your side, follows you wherever you go. I know this because every time I'm at a party where he's the guest, he stands next to me and asks about security and if he can have a job, which after a while gets very annoying. I've tried my best to keep him of the intern list and I've succeeded for about a year, but now he's on it and there's nothing I can do about it. I suppose I could talk to Clarisse, but she's the one who insisted he learn about security. Obviously she doesn't realise how much having him around will limit the amount of time she and I will be able to spend together. I am so not looking forward to his arrival, I'll enjoy my last few days of peace while I can.

20/7/04

Clarisse had to attend a parliament session this morning. I don't like it when she has parliament sessions because I can't make up excuses to go in and see her like I can when she's working in her office. She received some distressing news about Mia's future. Apparently someone brought up an old law and she has to get married within the next month in order to become queen. Excluding Sebastian, the parliament members seem to think Clarisse has been keeping the throne warm for far too long and should let someone of different blood take the throne – a man. According to Clarisse, Viscount Mabrey is out to get her, because his nephew is eligible to assume the throne and he wants power. Mia is really upset about this whole marriage thing because she protests against arranged marriages and it's quickly becoming one resort she may have to turn to.

21/7/04

Oh god, he's here! Lionel at my side all day, every day! He came early in the morning and has been following me around ever since. I fear he may be outside my door as I write this, so it's best not to write too loudly incase he figures out I'm awake and comes in to ask more questions. Seriously he has not left me alone all day! He even follows me to the toilet! I feel invaded! I can't even touch Clarisse or go anywhere near her while he's around. I must have a talk to her about him tomorrow if she's not too busy with this planning Mia's wedding business, even though she hasn't even gotten a fiancée yet.

Something Clarisse conveniently neglected to inform me about earlier is that she has invited Mabrey's nephew to stay at the palace...starting tomorrow. I have no idea why she invited him, or when she invited him or even how she invited him as the two of them have never met. I don't like the idea of having him come and stay, he wants to take the throne right out from under my girl and she's letting him stay to get free ammunition to use against her.

Note to self: Hang Viscount's nephew in courtyard.

22/7/04

I spoke with Clarisse about the whole Lionel thing, but she shrugged me off and pretty much told me to deal with it. I didn't like her not doing anything about him, it means I'm stuck. Trapped. I can't do anything with that guy around, I can't be intimate with Clarisse, I can't go to her suite at night, hell I can't even masturbate without him knowing about it. This experience could very well drive me insane.

After I talked to Clarisse, Lionel decided he wanted to speak with her, so I gave them a couple of seconds, noticed he was too close to her and pulled him away. I can't have some little seventeen-year-old boy hitting on my woman, it's disgusting and knowing her, she might fall for him. Eww.

Earlier on, Lord Deveraux arrived at the palace with his uncle, the Viscount, and had a meeting with the princess and queen. I immediately recognised him as the man Mia was dancing with at the ball, she recognised him too and stomped right on his foot. I was bewildered at why she did that, I'm guessing she fell for him and then found out he's trying to steal her crown. Yeah, that sounds about right.

On a cheery note, I earned myself $1,000 because I was the closest to guess when Mia's suite would be ready which was actually today. Yes, it's finally done! I guessed it would be done by the 29th of September and I was right. I think I'll spend that money on a present for my lovely girlfriend since I can't meet with her in person because of this leech following me around all the time.

Miss Lilly arrived from Berkley at about 6am – a nice surprise Clarisse planned for Mia. Lilly and Mia have spent the whole day talking and catching up on old times.

I haven't been able to talk to Clarisse lately because of this whole Lionel thing. I wish he'd just leave so I could kiss my baby or at least hold her hand. I'm not used to spending this much time apart from her, it only ever happens when Mia's here. If she'd just let everyone know we're together there wouldn't be a problem.

Right, that's it, I'm going to tell her. I'm going to come right out and tell her I want to be acknowledged. I don't care who's listening when I say it. If only I could figure out how to tell her. I want to sound forceful, but not too forceful, and I want to imply marriage, but not actually say it incase she gets scared and runs off again. Hmm…now how will I put it? I want you to publicise me? No. I think we should be together not only in private? No. It needs to sound sophisticated. I think it's time we take our relationship to the people? Oh bugger it, I'll think of something later.

23/7/04

We, (Charlotte, Mia, Lilly, Clarisse and I) all had a viewing session of possible husband choices for Mia. In my opinion, she didn't have much of a good selection, they were either too old, too young, gay or addicted to something or other, but one bachelor was as Mia put it, decent. He is someone I strangely have never heard of before, Andrew Jacoby. Clarisse has already called him and he's flying out from England right now to meet with the princess in hopes they may get to know each other and possibly fall in love. I don't like the idea of her having an arranged marriage, she seems so against it.

I figured out a way to spend time with Clarisse without Lionel interfering, I just dump him on shades. He needs to learn how to deal with interns since I've decided to retire with Clarisse and let him take over. Retiring with Clarisse is something I can definitely see myself doing. We'll take refuge in a nice cottage and live out our days enjoying each other's company. That is if she decides to marry me, which I sincerely hope she does. I don't know what I'll do if she says no. I'd probably leave and never come back cos I am so god damned sick of her rejecting me, or I'd attempt to find a new wife and forget about her altogether. Who am I kidding? I could never forget her.

25/7/04

Finally I've had some alone time with Clarisse! I actually spent the night with her without Lionel knowing. I told him that Shades had been acting suspiciously and that he should follow him around, so that's what he's been doing for the past few days. Yesterday Andrew arrived in the country and he and Mia have already been on their first "romantic" outing to the beach. Not so romantic seeing as though Clarisse called the media to view it. I decided not to go along in order to give Shades a chance to see what it's like to be the one in charge. And while he was doing that, I was visiting my son. Uneventful day it was, but I couldn't say the same about the night.

As I said, I had some alone time with my darling and she told me all about how she felt sorry for Mia.

We were lying in bed at the time facing each other and staring into each others' eyes. She was tearing, I think the conversation started off with her saying, "I hate this. What they're doing to her."

"Mia?"

She nodded, "How can they force her to marry someone she doesn't know?"

I slid my hand along her arm and whispered, "You're not exactly helping the situation are you? Besides, they made you do it, didn't they?"

"Not exactly. I was the one who arranged my marriage to Rupert."

I was shocked, "You did?"

She nodded, "I felt different to Mia back when I was young, I felt pragmatism, not loyalty was the way to go. I didn't care about finding love, I just wanted security, money and a nice place to live. I found that in Rupert and wedged my way between him and his fiancée-to-be. He was in love with her, but his parents didn't exactly approve. They approved of me, however, this caused the two to have a riff and as far as I know they never spoke to each other again. I didn't feel bad about it at the time, but I do now. Rupert's parents forced him to propose to me even though he didn't want to, so I accepted and we married. There was only one person I felt sorry for and that was Chester. He wanted so badly to marry me, but I turned him down when I met Rupert. He was so upset with me and the night before my wedding, we argued and I cried so hard. I don't think he understood I wasn't in love with him, or he wouldn't accept it anyway, and the only thing he could offer me was his amazing bedroom abilities and one-sided undying love. I still wonder to this day what would have happened if I had married him, I bet I'd have had fifty children and would be working as a stripper."

She laughed at that last line, "That was my dream once upon a time, could you imagine?"

I had to shift my legs around when she said that, I almost went hard imagining her as a stripper. I think she'd have been good at it – she sure knows how to wear sexy negligees and flaunt what she has. She can make any clothing article look sexy. Perhaps I should allow her to fulfil her dream by performing a private session for me. I know! I'll ask for a freebie for my birthday.

Strippers aside, Clarisse and I had a very enjoyable evening, she talked, I listened, I found out a lot more about her. She told me she's been proposed to seven times in her life by four different men, me included. What she wouldn't tell me is who the third person was, I guess it's someone not even I know about.

28/7/04

Mia must be getting along very well with Andrew, because the two of them have decided to marry. It was announced yesterday afternoon and already Andrew has left the country. I assume he's off for a last fling before being tied down, I'd do the same if I was getting married to someone I obviously didn't love. Clarisse seems to think Andrew is the bee's knees and that nothing he can do is wrong. She absolutely adores him and his parents. I don't understand why, they aren't that exciting.

I'm taking her on a picnic tomorrow, it's all been arranged. I asked Charlotte to pack a basket along with a rug and teapot. She doesn't know for sure who I'm taking on the picnic, but I can imagine she suspects Clarisse as I asked her to clear some time off her schedule. Well at least I know I can trust Charlotte.

29/7/04

Rumour has been going around at the moment that Mia and Lord Deveraux were caught in a closet together. Apparently Mrs. Kaut walked in on them when they were, as Shades put it, playing hide the sausage. I'm not sure whether to believe it or not, because for one, everything said in the palace gets twisted around and two, I don't think she'd do something like that in a place where someone could easily see her. Clarisse questioned me about it after our picnic, she was disappointed in Mia for acting so irresponsibly and not having the decency to sneak him into her suite. She obviously believes the rumours, she is so quick to judge.

Anyway, after the picnic we went walking together through the gardens and sat down in the gazebo. I planned the whole thing out, I told her what I was feeling and that I thought we should bring our relationship to the public and as soon as I said it, I instantly regretted it. The look on her face said it all, nevertheless I stayed strong, listened to her bullshit explanation and attempted a smile as she told me she'd think about it. God, what is there to think about? She's had her whole life to think about it. How many times do I have to prove my love for her?

I really doubt she'll say yes, yet I will remain confident up until she gives me her answer. What will happen to me if she doesn't agree? I'll go out of my mind and want to kill her! Well, this is it, the last chance, I've had enough rejection from that woman to last the rest of my life. If she says no, I'll leave and never come back and I mean it. She's caused me that much pain and wasted that much of my life. Why can't she just listen to her heart?

K I'm going to end that there cos I'm going out soon. Sorry this took forever to update, but when I was in the middle of writing this chap, my monitor karcked it. Then I went away on holiday and got back the day before yesterday. My mum had bought a new monitor by then.

Kayjay, you're going to be waiting a long long time I think. This story isn't going to end anytime soon. Perhaps it will be done by the end of next year?

R & R.