22/8/04

This morning after I woke up from Maurice and Chloe liking my face, I looked around and found my wife sitting on the side of the bed. She didn't look very angry and I was somewhat relieved that she didn't have divorce papers in her hand. Maurice backed down and stepped on my genitals before jumping off the bed to sit beside Clarisse.

"If you've come for a morning bitch, then I'm not interested," I said turning away from her and attempting to go back to sleep.

I'm 97 percent sure she was offended by that because she elbowed me in the back and made me look at her again.

"A morning bitch? Well just for that remark I've decided not to tell you that I forgive you."

Rolling my eyes and groaning, I felt her get up and shout, "Come Maurice."

"Wait!" I grabbed her skirt and pulled her back, "I'm sorry."

"Oh are you Joseph?"

"Yes."

She sat back down, "In that case, I'll stay a few minutes."

There was an awkward silence.

"Joseph, Chester told me it was his fault."

"Oh it's about fucking time you saw him for what he is."

"Joseph mind your language."

This was a stupid thing to say considering she said that word just last night!

"So you forgive me then?" I asked.

"I forgive your anger, but I can't condone your actions, you behaved badly."

"Clarisse, I'm not going back to anger management if that's what you're about to suggest. As long as you keep that pathetic excuse for a human being away from me and away from you, I can control my anger."

Clarisse looked at her hands and sighed, I'd still like you to go."

"No, that's my final word."

"I wish there was someway I could force you to go, but there isn't."

She got up and walked to the door, "I have a busy morning, I'll meet you for lunch later."

"Okay."

Her sad smile as she walked through the door made me realise just how hard life must be for her. She has a duty to please everybody, but it's an impossible task. I'm going to be glad tomorrow (yes, tomorrow) when she's not queen anymore, it means she'll be free from most royal duties and she'll have time to just be herself…with me.

Chester had left the palace early in the morning, I think an hour before Clarisse came to see me. I was relieved that he wasn't there when I woke up, for it meant no complications, no arguments and nobody to avoid.

When I had my lunch with Clarisse, she didn't say much, she looked awfully drained and tired. She told me she hardly got any sleep because she was nursing her 'friend' back to health all night. I bet that means they slept in the same bed, god I hope for his sake he didn't touch her - I'll murder him!

The rest of my day consisted of reading, working out, walking, watching Clarisse work, buying new socks and discovering a dungeons and dragons club in one of the tunnels under the west wing. I didn't even know anyone in Genovia had heard of dungeons and dragons, let alone played it. I recognised some of the people there as gardeners and security interns. Oh and Shades was what I think is called the "Dungeon Master". Shades! Who would have thought it?

In the evening I ate dinner with my wife and she started talking about the coronation, I almost forgot that it was tomorrow because unless I'm making the security plans for something, I won't remember what day it's on. It doesn't really matter though because all I have to do is show up.

Later…

This evening when I entered our suite, I noticed it was very dark. White candles were lit everywhere, there was soft piano music playing in the background, the curtains had been changed from floral patterns to flowing red velvet, the fireplace was ablaze and I could smell a musky scent in the air. As I walked further into the room, I saw Clarisse standing behind one of the bed curtains. She was dressed in the same red velvety material the curtains were made of, which on her colour chart meant she was openly hungry for love. She looked very calm and relaxed when she walked up to me and took my hands, "Joseph, I know you want to wait a bit longer before we re-rekindle the physical side of our relationship, but I thought that since this is the last night I'm going to be queen we could forget about it and simply enjoy one another's company."

My hands slipped around her waist and I looked dreamily at her, "How many drafts did you go through before deciding on those lines?"

"Not one, it came straight from the heart."

I raised an eyebrow and she giggled, "Alright I went through two."

Both of us started giggling and I suddenly found myself giving into her. I wanted to love her and it was my last chance to make love to her as a ruler, after tonight, she's just a normal person…a normal person who just happened to be queen.

So we undressed, drank some wine, got into bed and had one amazing night. She decided to show me how she likes to make love and I have to admit, it is better. We couldn't get enough of each other, we made love over and over again until two in the morning and we then called it a night.

23/8/04

I'd like to announce that my granddaughter, Mia will now be known to the world as Her Majesty Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, Queen of Genovia.

I'd also like to announce that her grandmother, Clarisse Moncella Renaldi Alexander is finally free after years of service to the country she was born in.

My happiness cannot be measured today, I have my wife to myself for a whole week and then afterwards we're going to start working on plans for our new house. Clarisse informed me that since she doesn't approve of 'resident grandmothers' or of herself being one, we're moving into our own place. I'm looking forward to seeing how our house will turn out, all I know at the moment is that it's not going to be small, that's for sure.

I suppose I should write down what happened today, being such an important day in history and all…

First thing in the morning I was woken to the bed sheets being pulled off my naked body, I moaned Clarisse's name and told her to put them back on, but my wish was not granted. It was a very cold morning and I was very tired, so I looked around to see where the blankets were and what time it was – 10am. My eyes fell shut again, but I noticed that there was a lot of noise being made, unbeknownst to me, there were about ten people in the room. Instinctively I covered my genitalia and sat up to take a proper look around – flowers were being changed, the windows were being cleaned and the lovely red curtains had been taken down to be put away for another romantic event. There were at least four people buzzing around Clarisse in the dressing room trying to get her dressed in her pre-coronation outfit, which is the technical way to describe the clothes she'll be wearing up until the coronation, where she will change into her formal dress.

Still covering myself up, I got out of bed and looked around for my clothes, unfortunately they were nowhere to be seen so I had to continue using my hand as protection from any wondering eyes while I walked over to the bathroom to find towels. The towels in the bathroom, along with everything else, had been sent out for cleaning, so I found myself resorting to running naked down the hall to my old room to find some clothes. Strange to say the only thing left in the room was the bed frame, as Clarisse had ordered everything to be moved into her suite – nice of her to mention that to me…

Again I ran stark naked back to Clarisse's suite and went straight for the closet where my best suit was waiting patiently for me to wear it.

Half an hour later I came out of the closet (no sarcasm please) to an empty bedroom where my wife was sitting on a freshly made bed with a small box in her hand. She smiled and motioned for me to sit down, "I have something for you."

"What is it?" I asked, accepting the box from her hand.

"Rupert gave it to me on our wedding day and it's been in my jewellery box ever since. I want you to wear it as a symbol of new beginnings and a welcoming into royal life."

Great, a hand-me-down I thought before opening the box to find a very royal looking, very red and gold brooch with a 'G' on it, "Thankyou, my darling," I said, kissing her forehead, "It's nice."

I was about to put it back in the box, but she practically shouted, "Aren't you going to put it on?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes I want you to, why do you think I brought it out of hiding? I want you to wear it."

Taking the brooch back out of the box, I attached it to my jacket, "Happy?"

"Yes," she replied before leaning back and admiring it proudly, "It suits you."

Forcing a smile, I stood up and asked her if she wanted to eat with me, she declined with the excuse she had some final documents to sign. I ended up eating with Charlotte even though I felt really awkward about it, and then I went to see the princess. She asked me how the search for Nicholas was going, but since I hadn't talked to anyone about it since the day I sent the team out, I had to lie and tell her we had a lead. She gave me a sad smile and asked if I would lend her an ear for a while. More or less she just wanted to tell me how scared she was about the coronation and how she had to grow up very quickly. I explained that I think she'll make a good queen once she's settled into her role. She went off to be alone.

Three hours later I went back to my suit and heard Clarisse complaining about her formal coronation dress. I hadn't seen the dress at that point in time, so when she came out wearing this beautiful long sparkly golden gown with matching long jacket, I was off in dreamland. It was a very nice looking dress and it had me momentarily lost for words.

"Clarisse, I…wow," I said when I came to, "You look so…wonderful, so royal…so delicious."

I started nuzzling her neck and for a moment she giggled, but that didn't last long because she sort of pushed me away and told me not to ruin her makeup.

"My darling I don't think I've ever seen you look more beautiful than you do right now."

She raised her eyebrows and smiled, "I beg to differ, I was more beautiful before these layers and layers of fat came along," she said, pulling at her stomach, "Don't you think I looked better?"

Smiling in amusement, I shook my head, "You're funny, you know that? The way you take what's supposed to be a compliment and turn it into a debate."

She pretended to look insulted, "It's…my job."

I turned serious, "Not for much longer, twenty minutes until you're no longer the most powerful woman in the country."

Her smile left as the words passed through my lips and she paused for a moment, "Joseph do you think Mia is ready? I mean REALLY ready?"

"I do and I think you will make a very fine resident grandmother."

Slapping my chest she turned away and made a 'pfft' sound, "You know how I feel about being a resident grandmother, Joseph and you know being one is the last thing on my mind."

"So when are we moving out?"

"As soon as our house is built."

"Oh great," I replied sarcastically, "So we should be out of here by let's say…next century."

The look on her face after I said that scared me, she must have felt too insulted to speak.

"Well you are doing the designs aren't you? It takes you six weeks to pick out which wallpaper to use for the toilet."

Clarisse was frowning so hard her lips had almost disappeared, she spoke firmly, "If I weren't so terrified of wrecking my manicure I would dig my nails into you neck here and now."

Backing away from her I pondered making an excuse to leave just to get away from her terrible gaze. Her eyes were so full of fury I thought she was going to explode, but when I informed her there were only fifteen minutes left to go and suggested we make love, the evil look disappeared. She seemed reluctant at first, only about getting her hair messy, but she gave in and informed me that should one hair be out of place, it was on my head. With Clarisse on top of things we managed to have the best lovemaking session ever, well that's how it felt from my point of view – she still insists she's had better.

My self-esteem level: -215.38

By the time we'd finished, Clarisse was running late for the coronation and she made herself even later by stopping to fix up the tiny little out of place hair on her head. She had to run straight down the hall as fast as she could to make it in time. I didn't follow straight away, instead I paced myself and arrived by her side just as the coronation was about to begin. I waved to Mia, who was looking very nervous and excited on the other side of the staircase, and she pointed down below to where none other than Nicholas was standing. I held my thumb up and she smiled, mouthing the words, "Thank you."

As she and Clarisse were about to descend the staircase, I noticed the hem of the golden gown had tucked itself into the back of Clarisse's underwear without her noticing. I was going to let her walk out and be totally humiliated, but I knew I'd never live it down, so I untucked it and she spun around with her mouth open, "What are you doing? Why aren't you down there?"

"I'm going, I'm going!"

Since I wasn't allowed to use the stairs I walk down every single day, I had find an alternate route to the first floor. The shortest route I could think of was running to the other end of the palace, going down those stairs and running all the way back. By the time I did that, the ceremony was almost over and everybody was singing the Genovian anthem. I took Clarisse's waist and stared lovingly at her thinking how lucky I am to be a part of their family.

After Mia was officially announced queen, there was an after party – dinner and dancing. We didn't stay for long, because Clarisse and I wanted to start our honeymoon ASAP.

So we left the party and walked out the front as soon as it hit 3pm. I was surprised to find a very small, very shiny, silver sports car waiting for us on the lawn. "Whose car?" I asked, hoping damn well it was going to be mine.

"Good, it's finally here," Clarisse smiled.

"You know this car?"

"I ordered it from Germany as my wedding present to you about two days ago. Next day delivery my a-"

"It's for me?" I quickly interjected, "I love it."

Clarisse smiled as I asked if I could take a closer look and she laughed when I noted the features of it.

"Electric windows, leather seats, air conditioning, power steering…CD player with surround sound and a subwoofer. Clarisse, this car is amazing! Thankyou!"

Okay, well it's not as amazing as it could be - it's only a two-seater, but hey the rest of the car makes up for it.

Clarisse had the maids bring our bags down and load them into the boot, there was hardly any room in the boot though, so Clarisse could only take two large suitcases instead of five. I told her she probably won't need many clothes anyway and to my surprise, she laughed even though her ladies maids were standing right behind her.

At 4pm after saying a proper goodbye to Mia, Clarisse gave a short speech thanking all of the staff for many years of loyal service, I thought it was a very nice thing to do and they seemed happy to be acknowledged for five minutes.

Afterwards we set off, Clarisse stared out the back window and watched Mia and Nicholas kissing passionately in the distance, "How quickly that girl moves on…what ever happened to Michael? They broke up a month ago and already she's with someone else?"

She watched me as I drove, but I kept my mouth shut, as shut as I could keep it to avoid shouting, "YOU WERE WITH ME FOR TWO YEARS AND I WALKED IN ONE NIGHT AND FOUND YOU FUCKING YOUR EX!"

How glad I was to be able to contain that and not start a quarrel, which would have certainly ended our marriage.

Instead of going to where we originally planned to go on our honeymoon, we decided to take a detour to France, but as we drove along some rocky mountain shortcut Clarisse had informed me was safe, our honeymoon temporarily came to somewhat of a halt. Since my lovely new car wasn't built for four wheel driving, or for that matter, mountain driving, both of my front tyres popped and we're currently stuck on sort of a cliff. Both our phones are out of range and because we didn't plan on travelling off-road, we didn't think to pack a C.B or C.V radio (whatever they're called). Clarisse seems quite calm considering our circumstances, but that's only because she's been here before…with HIM, the man I despise more than anything in the world excluding paedophiles. Clarisse said she used to come up here with him all the time as a teenager on his motorcycle and they'd sleep under the stars enjoying each other's company.

Yuck, I don't want to think about those two together, I've already seen it with my own eyes and have spent a couple of years trying to forget it…

Clarisse and I had a bit of an argument when I decided to go for help, she didn't want me to leave her there alone, which is understandable, but she didn't want to come either. That's why we're stuck up here, because she appears to not mind having to sleep on rocks and use the ground as her toilet.

I must say, it's actually not that bad.

It's nightfall and she's leaning up against my chest staring out at the bright lights of the city in the distance (Paris). From where we are it's a very beautiful sight, even Clarisse is enjoying herself.

So actually it's turned out to be quite a pleasant honeymoon night, apart from the fact it's starting to rain and I have to put my journal away before it gets soaked.

So I'll finish here and say a pleasant goodnight to all!

A/N: Seriously, I apologize for the verrrry slow updates, I've got too much of an active life now that I'm working. Thanks for the reviews, everyone, much appreciated. Now it's time to R & R again.