Chapter 11

It's been several weeks since Gin's disappearance and the day I broke Zim's spirit. Even now I felt pain in my chest and stomach every time I thought about it and remembered his sad and broken look.

I rarely even saw him anymore. He only showed up for his classes as long as he had to at school and as soon as the bell rang he would disappear down the hall. I would run after him as best I could but it was no use and he always managed to escape. In some ways it felt like when we were kids only this time I didn't really know why I was chasing Zim…was it to apologize? Or maybe try to fix my mistake.

One highly noticeable difference I spotted in Zim was his outer appearance. He no longer had that arrogant and cocky smirk and glint in his eyes. Now his eyes were dead, and the only facial expression he made was an empty, depressed look that made him seem like a walking corpse. We never yelled at each other and when I tried to get his attention he just seemed to stare right through me as if he was in another world.

It hurt me honestly; I wish he would do something, anything to show me he hadn't completely been destroyed by my stupid words. I don't even care about what he had said to me anymore, it's something I had already known all my life!

I suppose the reason I feel so guilty is because Gin asked me to take care of Zim for her. Instead of doing what she asked the moment she leaves I go and I destroy him. I eliminate his reason to go on…at least I'm pretty sure that is what I did. I even stopped by his house some times and tried to get inside however GIR always shooed me out saying something about his master working. It's confusing to me because if Zim is like a zombie at school then why would he be any different at home? And what has he been planning for so long.

I always try to push him out of my mind but I can't… aren't you supposed to feel good when you crush your enemy? Well then why do I feel like my world has just been ripped out from under me? I've just been so busy trying to fix Gin's chip that I haven't even made a true effort to help Zim. And that makes me that much worse of a person because I know what he is going through. Having the people you devoted your life to, turn their backs to you. It hurts, and I would never want to make another person feel the way I do…alien or not, he still has obvious feelings, and I shouldn't be toying with them like this.

I sighed and laid my head down in my arms. It was Friday, and I happened to have a day off of school. Instead of just sitting on my butt or having fun all day, I was in my father's lab working on Gin's chip and feeling guilty about Zim.

Why can't I be normal? Oh yeah because I am the crazy son of Professor Membrane and the only intelligent person in this entire town.

I was so busy talking to myself and pacing around that I knocked a box down from the top of a tall cabinet. I looked at it curiously wondering why it was up there in the first place before picking it up. I opened up the lid and found a bundle of blueprints crumpled up in the box carelessly, as if whoever put them there did it in a hurry. I lifted one up and studied it; however what I saw confused me. It was a diagram of a large tube like device. It had instructions and small diagrams of people being put inside the tube where another replica would come out. Before I had a chance to make sense of what all these things were when suddenly I could feel a large shape looming over me.

"What are you up to son?" my dad's loud voice boomed from over me, causing me to drop the paper I was holding and stare up at him guiltily.

"Oh… I uh, found this box full of blueprints and just was wondering why they were up there," I said but suddenly before I knew it Dad had snatched the box and blueprint out of my hands and hidden them behind his back.

"Oh this, no need to worry about it son. It's just some failed experiment of mine…yes that's it so go on and study some REAL SCIENCE! While I go get rid of these haha," he said nervously and I glared at him suspiciously.

"What were the blue prints for exactly?" I asked and before I knew it he had barked out some bull response and was gone just like that. I sighed; it wasn't much different than how it always was. I still want to know why he was acting so strange however.

I decided to go back to the lab station to attempt to work on Gin's chip a bit more. Unfortunately as I was working my mind was caught up in other things.

"I hate it when Dad always does that to us, I mean he tells me to get interested in, 'real science'," I attempted to imitate him but failed, "and the moment I actually do try real science he rips it out of my hands and then dashes off with it…I swear sometimes I think we aren't even related. Like I'm just some failed experiment of his that he decided to let live."

Many people were giving me strange glances as they went by to do work but I ignored them and continued seething.

"Same with Gaz, I mean she's gotten slightly nicer but she still treats me like crap sometimes!" I grumbled stabbing my pencil down on the table and breaking the tip.

"You know I'm starting to think Zim is the only per-," I stopped, mid speech the hand gripping my pencil shaking slightly. Did I just say Zim? No that isn't what I meant, but…what didn't I mean. I didn't even finish that sentence so how can I know what I meant?

But again, what was I going to say? Zim was the only person who…acknowledges my being. Yes, that was what I was going to say. I am the only person who Zim has never been bothered being associated with. It was probably just because I was the only person who knew he was an alien though.

I see him almost like my friend sometimes. Well not anymore of course…I'm just waiting for him to snap out of his depression finally but if he's been like this for weeks then, who knows when he will go back to normal. I hope that he comes back soon because seeing him now is scary almost.

"Ha, look at me. Talking as if I actually care about him! Pah, yeah right he's still a horrible green space monster," I chuckled but it didn't sound very convincing even to myself.

Ugh what is going on with me? I slammed my head against the cold lab station I was working on and heard a few disapproving noises from the staff near me. I rolled my eyes and continued to ignore them however. I wish I could do that with Zim…just roll my eyes and ignore him. But I just can't, there's just something about him!

Great now I'm starting to sound like a love sick school girl. As I thought that my stomach turned, probably from disgust. I would never like Zim, god no way! That's just wrong, I mean, he's an alien bent on destroying the world…or at least, he was before I had to go and ruin everything. I groaned out loud before lifting my head up and staring at my work in front of me.

I haven't made that much progress on Gin's chip so far. I think this technology is too primitive. Maybe when Zim gets better I can ask to use his technology. I bet because it's about Gin he would help me.

I decided that maybe I had done enough work for today, and it would be best for me to get out. I gathered up my stuff and moved it to my storing cupboard, the 'fake science' cupboard as I heard some people called it.

Once everything was put away I walked out of the lab and upstairs. I opened the front door when I got to it but was met with a cold outdoors. Shivering I turned and grabbed my coat off the rack next to me. You know, it's a shame I don't wear this anymore, it's a pretty nice trench-coat. Maybe I will go back to it. Pulling it on I stepped outside and closed the door behind me. I pulled up the hood on the back of my coat and started walking down a familiar path that I had taken many times before.

Don't ask me why I was walking towards Zim's house because even I don't know. I walked slowly breathing in the cold crisp air around me and looking at the sky. It was only twelve o'clock and there were large puffy clouds that looked so perfect, they almost seemed fake.

I don't know if that makes sense to anyone else but, it makes sense to me. I smiled and continued on noting the familiar cracks and marks in the sidewalk. The graffiti on the fences the familiar faces. I sighed sadly; everything seemed to fit in around here. It was all welcomed and a part of this place. Everything except for me it felt like.

I tried to shake off my dejected feeling as I came up to the circular stretch of road in which Zim resided. I went around to the large empty space that used to be Gin's house and stared at it. I still don't understand how she could have just disappeared like that I mean…she could have at least stayed to a few more days. I thought of her smile, the way she used to care so much about Zim, how she seemed so fascinated in the things around her. I smiled faintly and turned to leave but something white caught my eye.

I walked into the center of the dirt square and found a piece of paper, folded there. It looked white and clean as if it had only just been set there. I don't know how I could have missed this I mean, I came by here often for the past few weeks.

I opened up the piece of paper and saw a note there and on the top of it was my name.

"Dib, I hope you found this letter on time and it isn't twenty years later when the world is a big fiery ball of destruction. I also hope this is Dib, if not then you put this back where you found it, NOW FILTHY HUMAN NOW! Dib, how are you? How is Zim doing? I hope you were able to take care of him like I asked. I also hope you have made good progress on the chip, yes I did expect you to fix it in case you weren't aware. You should also be using Zim's technology, for your human technology is too inferior to fix or duplicate something as complex as that chip. Just tell him why you are there and he will let you use his labs I'm sure. Do you remember when we spoke of our favorite music and you wanted to share music together? I certainly do, let's do that soon. What is your favorite music? My favorite songs are by this band called Sleeping With Sirens. The songs are called Who Are You Now and Let's Cheers To This. Classy no? Well, I hope your progress is going well, have a nice day earthling, and good luck.

Post, Script: Ask Zim to help find me. He'll know where I am :)

-Sincerely Invader Gin"

I clutched the letter in shock with trembling hands and a smile on my face. Gin is still on earth! At least, that is how she made it sound in her letter. When did she put this here, it had to have been recently. I nearly jumped for joy. Racing over to Zim's house I raised my hand to knock but froze in midair.

I had to face my worst enemy and ask him to help me. I had to face my biggest mistake and…I wasn't ready to.