Shortly after Loki's baby shower, a nearby university offered Jane a prestigious research position in astrophysics. She accepted, and promptly relocated to New York City.

Thor volunteered to help her move.

Thor sat stretched out on the large overstuffed couch he had just carried up three flights of stairs. The Midgardians at the thrift store had moaned about how impossibly heavy it was; Thor had laughed, lifting it by himself with ease. No, for him—a god—it was little more than an awkwardly shaped bag of potatoes, and he'd scampered up the first two flights with no trouble whatsoever. Unfortunately, he'd misjudged a turn when he got to the third flight and stumbled, giving his ankle a severe sprain and dropping said heavy couch in such a way that it wedged itself between the stairway walls.

He'd roared in pain, causing no less than three of Jane's new neighbors to peek out their peepholes, but no one came to offer assistance. Thor had ordered Jane back inside and managed to wrestle the couch free, hobbling to drag it the rest of the way up and put it in its place in her apartment. He'd immediately plopped down upon it and put his injured ankle up, and Jane was now holding a bag of frozen peas on it, worriedly asking him if he was sure it wasn't broken. Thor smiled in spite of the pulsing drumbeat of pain.

"It's fine, my love. Just a twinge. Do you forget I am Aesir? It'll be perfectly well in an hour or so."

"That's a little hard to believe," Jane said. "It's swelling like crazy. We should go to the ER and have it checked out."

Thor chuckled appreciatively. The Lady Jane was so cute when she fretted over him! "No, fair one. Trust me, it's nothing. But if you'd like to do something for me, I'd have a cold glass of water. I'm positively parched."

Jane looked up at him, frowning, but she nodded. "All right. Stay put, I'll be right back."

Jane returned with the water, and Thor threw it back in one gulp. Jane shook her head—Thor's rate of consumption always astounded her—and she sat down at the other end of the couch, staring dubiously at Thor's ankle.

And so they sat in silence, that is to say, Thor sat in silence. At some point, Jane began talking, and Thor settled into a blissful state of drowsy contemplation as the throb in his ankle ebbed ever more faint and Jane's voice washed over him like a gentle ocean wave. He had not the faintest clue as to what she was saying, but he loved hearing her voice, low and musical like the tiny birds that sang by his window back on Asgard. Oh, it was pleasant. Warm and happy, he might have slipped into a gentle nap, but...

One simple sentence stabbed through his consciousness like an ice pick.

"...so, you will be there, right?" Jane asked.

Thor blinked. "Uh... I beg your pardon? What did you say?"

Jane's expression soured. "You weren't even listening, were you? I said, they're having a big fundraiser dinner for our department in a couple of months. All kinds of big shots'll be there and everyone on staff is expected to attend. I don't want to go all by myself." She rolled her eyes at Thor's bewildered expression. "Come on, this is kind of a big deal—it's not as if I'm not giving you plenty of notice. Do you think you can make it?"

Thor straightened, frowning. "This sounds akin to a royal command to court."

"Uh... I guess it is. Kind of."

"Such affairs are very formal. I haven't proper Midgardian attire."

"Well, yeah, you'll need a tux—"

"What is a 'tux?'" Thor asked, his face scrunched at the unfamiliar term.

"It's a dressy kind of suit. But don't worry, I bet Tony knows where to get a nice one. Although, off the rack might be a problem..." she said, gripping Thor's bulging bicep.

Thor grinned and proudly flexed the muscle under Jane's slender fingers, but the frown quickly returned. "But, I'm not familiar with the etiquette for such an occasion."

"Sweetie, you just have to be polite and... maybe not say very much. Just, you know, follow my lead and you'll be fine."

Thor still looked skeptical. "Loki always says I have terrible table manners, insofar as Midgardian customs are concerned."

"Well, we've been working on that. You're doing much better—by the time the dinner comes around, you'll be using a knife and fork like a pro." Jane watched Thor's face for an encouraging sign, but he maintained a detached expression, apparently still mulling over the idea. "So, will you?" she finally prompted.

"Hm?"

A slight huff of exasperation. "I said, will you?"

"Will I what?"

"Make it to the dinner!"

"Oh! Well, I shall certainly try. When is it?"

"May 24th."

"Well, that should be fine, I—" Thor stopped cold. May 24th? Hmm. Something about that date. What was it? He frowned, trying to remember—ugh, the Midgardian timekeeping system was so confusing.

Jane carried on.

"From what I hear, the banquet's really spectacular. You'll love it. There's free booze, too. Plus, we get to take our guests on a tour of the facilities, so you can see where I work. Oh, and I'll have to buy a dress, damn it. Maybe we can make a day of it when we go looking for your tux. Oh, wait, I don't have any shoes! That's the real problem, and I hate shoe shopping..." Jane careened on, speaking of things that sounded to be of grave importance, but which meant little if anything to Thor, and he couldn't concentrate anyway because he kept trying to think of the significance of that damn date.

May 24th.

May 24th.

May 24th...

Oh.

Oh.

Thor sat upright, disregarding the pain in his ankle. A very clear memory of Loki imperiously marching him into the Stark Tower kitchen and standing him in front of a calendar adorned with scantily-clad women came back to him.

"Now, look, Thor,"Loki had said after flipping forward to the page labeled "May." "See? According to Banner's calculations, the baby is due here—" One elegant finger tapped rapid-fire on the 24th square, the one viciously circled in thick black marker. "...and you'd better be close at hand, then as well as the week before, in case it comes early. I'll not be bothered searching the Nine for you when I need you to go fetch Mother, do you understand?" Loki had turned a dark glower on him, and Thor had nodded solemnly.

"Of course, brother. Worry not. I will not fail you at your most precious hour of need."

"Well, you'd better not," Loki had snarled, his eyes narrowed to sparkling green slits. "Or, the minute Stark's get has left my body, I'll use my seidr to turn you into the most wretched, limbless, unholy creature this realm has ever seen and use you to deposit the leavings from my spawn's diaper. Hear me well—brother."

Thor had absently patted Loki's arm, taking the threat in good stride. Loki had been... emotional lately, veering from silent and dour to weepy and sorrowful in mere moments, but this level of energy spiked with such viciousness was new, and Thor pitied the poor Man of Iron more than he ever had in his life.

Returning to the immediate matter, Thor regretfully took Jane's hand. "I'm afraid I must decline, my sweet. That date has been reserved in service to my brother, as it is then when my nephew is due to arrive. I'm very sorry to disappoint you, but much depends on me and I cannot risk being unavailable. T'would be better if you found another companion for the evening."

Jane's eyes widened. "That's Loki's due date? Oh, wow, how exciting! Well, never mind, then." She pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Maybe I can convince Dr. Selvig to go with me. I'm sure he'd love to see my lab. Although, he swore he'd never get within a hundred miles of Loki ever again. Fortunately, he doesn't know he's in Manhattan; maybe I can just leave that part out."

"I'd advise it," Thor agreed. He took her chin in his hand and gave her a gentle kiss. "Thank you for being so understanding."

"Well, how often does a person get to help his pregnant brother? I think it's fantastic, and I'm sure Loki appreciates you being there for him. I bet it'll help smooth things over between the two of you." Jane beamed at Thor and then she patted his knee. "How's your ankle?"

"It's fine," Thor said bravely, in spite of the continued throb.

"Really?"

"Yes, I swear."

"Great! Then, let's go get the matching armchair!" Jane hopped up and went to the door, holding it open as Thor inwardly groaned. He hauled himself to his feet and gamely avoided limping, at least whenever Jane cast a glance at him.

After the calendar incident, Thor made a point of stopping by Stark Tower more frequently. Yes, Thor had a reputation for being an insensitive oaf, but that wasn't really true; the thunder god had heard the worry and stress underlying Loki's voice even as he'd threatened him, and Thor was determined to prove to his brother that he was reliable, dedicated, and fully on top of his uncle-to-be responsibilities.

Only to be met with venomous snarls, bitter insults and nasty cracks about his intelligence (nothing new in that, but it was the way Loki said them—he'd achieved a level of contempt that penetrated even Thor's healthy ego.)

Oh, and flying objects. Lots of them, some heavy, some sharp, all thrown with amazing accuracy. Well, accurate assuming the goal was merely to terrorize and bruise, not to kill. If that was Loki's intention, Thor was amazingly lucky, many times over.

It occurred to Thor that if Loki was being so vicious with him, the Man of Iron might be in real danger. And indeed, now, with Loki's hormone-fueled rage getting more and more out of control, Thor was beginning to fear for Tony Stark's life.

He decided he'd better have a private conversation with him.

Thor called Tony and asked if they could meet, just the two of them. Tony readily agreed and invited him over, and although he sounded surprised, he didn't ask questions. But when Thor arrived at the Tower entrance, Tony asked, "What's the big secret, Hercules?" as he led Thor to the elevator that would take them up to the living area.

Thor looked around surreptitiously, and asked "Where's Loki?" in a none-too-quiet whisper. He had the air of a mouse on a mission to sneak out under the cat's very nose, which mystified the hell out of Tony. He shot a probing look at Thor.

"He's taking a nap. What's the deal? You scared of him all of a sudden?"

"No, of course not," Thor said with a small twitch. "This isn't about Loki—it's about you."

"Me?"

Thor nodded vigorously. "Yes. I came to tell you that everything is going to be all right. At present, things may seem bleak—dangerous—utterly hopeless, even—but I want you to know, Man of Iron, that I am your friend, I am in your corner, and if there is anything I can do for you, you have only to say the word, and I will be by your side in an instant." Thor hovered over Tony, sincerity emanating from his pores, and Tony folded his arms across his chest and stared. After a moment, he nodded.

"That... is great to hear. You're a champ, big guy, and I want you to know I appreciate it."

Tony's words greatly pleased Thor, and he relaxed a bit and smiled.

"But, would you mind telling me what the hell you're talking about?"

Thor's face fell. He knew he wasn't the best at communicating in the Midgardian vernacular, but he thought his words had been quite clear. He cast about for a different way to say it. "I am merely offering you, eh, safe haven. A port in the storm. Sanctuary. Should you need it, I mean. Friend Stark—you are not alone." Thor put his hand on Tony's shoulder and gave a firm squeeze that kind of hurt, and Tony gingerly eased out of Thor's grip while still nodding genially.

"Okay... Well, that's good to know, but I'm still kind of in the dark. Why would I need sanctuary? From what?"

Thor pursed his lips, his eyes shifting from side to side. He then leaned closer and rasped, "Loki."

Tony's eyebrows shot up. "Loki?" he said before breaking into a laugh. "Why would I need protection from Loki?"

"Please do not pretend with me, there is nothing you could say about my brother that would surprise me. Has he threatened you with harm if you tell of his abuse? Again I remind you, I am here for you, I can take you away for the duration if need be, or—"

"Abuse? Thor—Loki's fine." Tony put a hand on Thor's arm and met his eyes directly. "I promise, I'm in no danger. Why would you think I was?"

"Has he not berated you?"

"Uh—"

"Has he not flung sharp pointy objects in the general vicinity of your head, neck, or torso?"

"Uhhh—"

"Has he not threatened you with a series of dire bodily ailments once he again has the use of his seidr?"

The bewildered expression on Tony's face deepened and he held up one hand to halt Thor's onslaught of fears. "God, Thor, no. Jeeze, he's been a little cranky now and then, who wouldn't be in his condition, but no, for the most part, he's doing great. What makes you think he's, you know—bonkers?"

Just then, Loki sauntered into the front room. Thor's eyes widened and he looked protectively at Stark as Loki approached the smaller man.

"Hello, darling," the trickster god said sleepily. He wrapped his arms around Tony and snuggled into him. Tony hugged him back and Thor observed a look of total contentment cross the man's face as he lovingly rubbed circles on Loki's rounded tummy.

"Hey there, gorgeous. Did you and Junior get enough sleep?"

Loki laughed. "Oh, never. But, the little one is restless, so I thought I'd come see what you were up to." He put his hands at the small of his back, leaned back and stretched while regarding Thor benignly. "Hello, Thor, it's good to see you." He then went up to his brother, who braced himself. Thor rued the thought of having to defend himself in front of Tony, and of course he would do nothing to actually harm Loki, but he went on full alert as he clamped his muscles together, in case Loki decided to plunge a blade between his ribs or deliver a blow to his solar plexus with a force that belied Loki's still-lanky frame.

But all Loki did was hug him. He gave Thor a sweet grin as he pulled away and asked, "Stay for lunch?" He went back to stand beside Tony, who slipped an arm around Loki's waist.

"Yeah, we ordered a ton of Indian food. You in?"

Uncertain, Thor gave a slight nod, and then Tony kissed Loki. He paused a moment, eyeing the two brothers thoughtfully before turning to stride away. "Uh, I need to make a few calls—you two chat, and I'll meet you upstairs when the food gets here." He disappeared down some stairs, leaving them alone in front of the elevator to talk.

Loki turned back to Thor and raised an eyebrow. "Is something wrong?"

A little thrill of ire rose in Thor's chest. "I came in concern for the wellbeing of your mate, if you must know."

"What?"

"Oh, please. You've been an absolute mountain troll to me every time I've visited lately. I've begun to fear for Starkson's life."

"Are you insane?"

"No, are you? You've raged at me, threatened me, and nearly took my head off with a meat cleaver! What horrors are you putting your poor mortal through in my absence?"

Loki was staring balefully at Thor, but he made a low chuckle at Thor's question. "Ah. Now I see." Loki strutted up to Thor. "Do you honestly believe I would ever mistreat Tony?"

"You once threw him out a window!"

Loki waved his hand dismissively. "Eh, that was before. Now, I love him. He's everything to me. Even when this, this creature dwelling within me threatens to pulverize my innards and tap dances on my bladder twenty times during the night, leaving me with an aching head and back in the morn, I would no more take out my pain and frustration on my love than I would purposely trample an exotic flower beneath my boot." He gave Thor a pitying look. "How can you accuse me of such deviltry?"

Thor narrowed his eyes at his brother. "Meat cleaver. Here," he said, indicating an area a mere inch or two beside his neck.

"Oh, don't be so sensitive."

"Sensitive! I fear for my very life every time I come over here, I don't think that's being 'sensitive!'"

"Thor, you're my big brother. Haven't I always been able to count on you? I admit, I probably haven't been in the best mood when I've seen you lately, and, yes, I probably should, um, temper my behavior a bit more, but really, have I been that bad?"

"Yes!"

A hurt look crossed Loki's face. He scrunched up his nose apologetically. "I have?"

"You've been a terror!"

"Oh. Well, I didn't intend to be that way. It's just that—with you, I know I can be myself. You're Aesir, so I know you can take it. And you always make me feel so much better." A hopeful smile came over him. "Please, don't be angry with me. And, don't worry about Tony. I would never do anything to harm him, especially since I'm lucky enough to have you, who can take anything I dish out. Right?"

Thor's enraged expression softened. "Oh, Loki. Of course. I would just ask that you be mindful of my limitations. Sadly, I am no more immortal than you, and my flesh is subject to being rent by sharp metal blades, just as a mortal's is."

Loki looked unhappy. "But, flinging things is so satisfying."

Thor frowned and pondered for a moment. Then, he brightened. "Jane tells me of a plastic Midgardian disc known as a 'Frisbee,' which can be flung with little threat of permanent injury. Also, a type of weaponry called 'Nerf' guns, which shoot soft harmless projectiles at even a great distance. I would be happy to arm you with such, and make myself available to you as a target when needed. Would that be acceptable?"

A wry grin crossed Loki's face. "Well, that hardly sounds as gratifying as lobbing a well-placed paperweight, but I'm willing to give them a try. Perhaps you could offer some to Tony as well? It sounds like something he'd enjoy. I know there are times he'd like to take out his aggression in a harmless fashion. So, yes, please. Load us up."

Thor smiled and wrapped his brother in a smothering embrace. Being Aesir was a source of pride for Thor, but clearly, it brought with it all sorts of difficult responsibilities. How nice to be able avail himself of Midgard's wonders on occasion.

If only they'd discover a way to defy the law of gravity where heavy articles of furniture and cute girlfriends were concerned.