Chapter 4

"Clark get me there," Tess ordered, not hesitating a second, her reactions always having been decisive and a tad impulsive, avoiding thought all together for the most part.

He picked up his keys and turned but Tess didn't move, only changing from entirely urgent to urgent and a little annoyed. "Clark, I'm not kidding." And her eyes conveyed just how serious she was.

He looked up at her gravely and nodded. He turned and walked into an alleyway. Tess followed, probably looking suspicious but not really caring. He grabbed her and ran her to the hospital in a blur of color. He dropped her off in front of the doors so as not to raise too much suspicion.

She pushed through the doors and up to the counter, looking deathly at the receptionist. "Oliver Queen was just brought in. Where is he?"

The secretary looked up at her with a sympathetic smile and for a moment Tess' heart dropped before she had time to decipher the meaning behind it. Her gaze dropped to the clipboard that was being slid toward her. Tess looked sharply at the woman. "No." She shamelessly used the glare that made grown men with all the power quake in their boots.

The nurse sighed and asked her partner to man the desk, as it was a particularly slow night. "Come with me."

They were in Gotham and almost as many strange things happen in Gotham as they do in Metropolis. Because of this they have a special ward devoted to things like Joker's laughing gas or Scarecrow's fear toxin. Oliver was in that ward. Tess followed the nurse through the sterile hallways, thinking about what she might find, her heartbeat getting quicker and quicker but keeping her calm facade on.

Supposedly he was one of the few that actually got hit. How or when it happened no one knew. The nurse was explaining all this to Tess, who was hardly listening due to the fact that her mind was clouded with worry.

What if they couldn't fix it? What if he died? What if he died and never knew how she felt? What if she never got the chance to tell him? A constant steam of what ifs that filled her up with more and more fear.

She was scared. No for once in her life she would allow herself to use the word. It applied here. She was terrified. Terrified that he would leave her all alone to face the darkness of the world, that his death would immediately extinguish what little light she saw in the world. But worst of all, him going and not knowing, thinking that she was in love with someone else. That was the world's biggest lie. He was the only one. He was always the only one. And frankly that had scared her. So she did the thing she blamed him for, running.

Forget starting over. She would give anything just to have him back, to know he was ok. She would forget the Green Arrow. She wouldn't show up tomorrow. He just needed to be there.

They stopped outside a window, jarring Tess out of her thoughts. "He's in there." The woman looked at Tess with sympathy. Her heart dropped. She walked forward a few steps. A doctor came over and told the woman go back to the desk and that he'd handle it. Tess heard it, she just couldn't process it, not when she was trying to process this...this disaster.

Tess walked over to the window. Oliver was thrashing, or attempting to do so. He was restrained. Chloe, Lois, and Clark came up behind her, but she was only vaguely aware they did so, eyes trained on the terrified blond man.

She felt herself pale, the strong facade gone. She wanted to cry, but enough of her dignity was aware that she held it in. He was yelling and screaming something. But it was inaudible. "It's soundproof. He's been like this since he got here," the doctor explained.

"What's he yelling for?" Lois asked, as Tess still couldn't say anything. She couldn't tear her eyes away. He was in so much pain, emotional pain. The toxin was messing with his head, making his worst nightmares a reality.

"Mercy." Her heart broke. Tess physically felt it happen. He was screaming for her. Tears threatened to spill for the first time in years. She was the cause for this.

No, now's not the time to be silenced by emotions. Tess flipped into business mode again, not skipping a beat. If she could do something, she could handle it. But waiting for a miracle was not an option. "Can he hear us?"

The doctor shook his head. His face said it all. He was a lost cause. But Tess didn't believe it. She didn't want to. She couldn't.

Her attitude seemed to catch on. Lois steeled herself. Chloe followed suit. Clark had always been unable to do so and none of the women expected that to change now. "What can we do?" Chloe asked.

"Nothing. I'm afraid that with the rate his heart is going due to the fear, he'll die." Tess had to steel herself all over again. She nearly lost it. He was that afraid for her.

"Listen, buddy, that's not an option. You spent thousands of dollars to learn how to fix people. You make thousands to do just that. Oliver Queen is coming out of that room alive. The only question is whether you need our help to do that or not," Lois began to yell. Chloe could respect that they all handled fear their own ways. She retreated into herself. Tess stuffed her emotions to the back of her mind. Clark falls apart. But Lois...Lois yells and screams and occasionally punches people, including innocent doctors who just don't know better.

The doctor obviously didn't understand the dangers of an outraged Lois Lane when he answered, "Miss, we did everything we can."

"Sir-" Clark began to reason.

He was cut off by an approaching scientist. "Doctor! Doctor!" he called as he ran down the hall "Doctor, we've had a breakthrough! This serum will banish the toxin from the mind. Unfortunately it's not enough though. The mind is already so far into the nightmare that they can't just banish it. They need someone to talk them out of it."

All three women sent the doctor a pointed glare. He gave an awkward smile in return. "Who wants to go in?"

Immediately, without hesitation, Tess volunteers. The doctor looks to the other three, who nodded in agreement, certainly not going to argue with a Tess set on anything, especially something this important. And certainly not after the events with the last serum Oliver was put under. He woke up and he wasn't afraid for himself, not his date, Tess was what came into his mind. And no one was going to argue with that. Tess turned and confidently walked over to the door. She was taking command and was not accepting no for an answer. When she reached the door she turned and looked the doctor in the eye. Her eyes held a ferocity that he didn't expect. It was confident and told him everything he needed to know about this woman, enough to scare him a little more than it should. "I want you to release the restrains. Inject him with the serum, then release him."

"Ma'am, he could seriously hurt you. He's flailing-"

She cut him off, he was like anyone else she had had to bulldoze over in the last few years. All those years under Lex had to amount to something, and if this was it, she wasn't going to argue. He would just need a little persuasion. "If you're worried about a lawsuit, I wouldn't be. I won't press charges regardless of what happens."

The doctor took a deep breathe, thinking it over. "Ok," he agreed. He realized no matter what he said she would get what she wanted. She was a smart woman with a lot of power, that much he knew. Bruce Wayne might be the power player of Gotham but he knew a big man on campus when he saw one and she was definitely distinguished among socialites.

They moved into the room and the doctor injected him with the serum. He didn't calm at all, but now he could hear them. "On my say," Tess told him. She placed her hand on his arm gently.

"Mr. Queen you're ok," the doctor reassured. But Oliver couldn't hear him. It was just another voice added to the mess. Everything anyone had ever told him about how useless he was and how he had hurt her was flooding back to him. Tess was bleeding out right in front of him she was calling out for him to save her, but he couldn't move. Why couldn't he move?

He felt something on his arm, a steady presence. It felt like hers. It couldn't be, she was dying right in front of him. There was nothing there. And she wasn't a ghost, not yet. But then one voice cut through the others and silenced them. "Oliver." It was her voice. The other voices started coming back but were silenced again. "Oliver," she called.

Clark, Lois, Chloe, and Bruce, who had just arrived and was caught up were watching with rapt attention. Lois was clinging to Clark. And by this time Chloe had forgotten her worry of Bruce and had grabbed his hand. He was seeming to respond to her voice. Whenever she spoke, his thrashing slowed. But they didn't know if that would be enough.

Tess' hand moved down to his. She clutched it firmly and took a deep breathe. "Oliver, I need you to listen to me." This time nothing happened. He kept thrashing. Tess panicked. This was her worst nightmare.

Then she felt something on hr head. It felt like a kiss. But coming from where? Then she heard Oliver's voice. "Come on, Mercy, come back to me."

Realization hit her. This was her worst nightmare. "This isn't real," she said aloud.

The world faded around her until it was all black.

She gasped and shot up. She was changed out of her dress and into hospital garb. The room was pitch black, almost as bad as the inside of her eyelids but now she could see her hands right in front of her face. She took a few more shaky breaths, realizing how close to death she had been and what her worst nightmare actually was.

It wasn't her father, as she had thought for so long. It wasn't watching Megan being killed. That nightmare plagued her sleep often but very rarely bothered her during her waking hours. Even her fear of not being enough altogether wasn't as bad as she thought. None of it was anything compared to the idea of anyone, especially Oliver, was hurt because of her.

She kept reminding herself that it wasn't real but his sweaty face flashed across her vision. His cries for her rang in her ears. She shuddered.

As her eyes adjusted to the darkness she saw that there was a chair beside her. And it was occupied. Oliver had stayed by her side. He wasn't gone. He was sound asleep beside her. Her heart jumped. She hadn't expected it. How could she have? The idea didn't even enter her mind.

She was still covered in cold sweat. Her breath was still shaky. She couldn't calm down.

Oliver grunted and turned in his sleep. She glanced over at him briefly but then returned to her thoughts that rushed back at the sight of him. His eyes flickered open. "Mercy?" he gasped.

"Mercy!" he cried. He threw himself off the chair and towards her. He grabbed onto her and held her tight, breathing in the scent of her. He nuzzled his face into her neck. He mumbled, "Mercy. Mercy. I thought-"

She wrapped her arms around him and rested her chin on his shoulder, grabbing at his shirt just to make sure he was real. And healthy. And just generally ok. Tears pooled at the corner of her eyes and blurred her vision. But that was ok, because she felt him and he was there and he was ok. He was ok. "I know. I know."

He broke away, looking her in the eye. He cupped her face, gliding his thumb across her face and wiping away a stray tear that managed to leak out. She leaned into the touch, reveling in the feeling of him. "Are you okay?" Concern was evident in his voice.

She nodded eyes still closed. "I'm fine. How long was I out?"

"Three hours," he answered.

"Three hours," she repeated softly in wonder. It felt like fifteen minutes. The longest fifteen minutes of her life, sure, but fifteen minutes.

"Get some sleep. I'll be here when you wake up."

She nodded weakly before laying down. She fell asleep instantly, unable to keep her eyes open any longer.

The next morning she gets checked out and released. Oliver took her home, not leaving any room for question. "Lois, Clark, Chloe, I assume Bruce, and I are going to lunch at twelve. Wanna tag along?" he offered, still unsure of how it would go. She hadn't let go of his hand all day.

"Ok," she agrees calmly, holding something back.

"Great. I'll pick you up at eleven thirty."

She smiles hesitantly but doesn't argue. She doesn't like the idea of being away from him for that long but she can't seem clingy. Besides, she's got to get past this. "Sounds good."

Oliver watched as she closed the door. He leaned up against it, thinking over the events of the previous night. He had found her as the Green Arrow. Chloe had come running into the ballroom where he, Clark, and Bruce were fighting Scarecrow. Bruce had wanted to take him on himself. When he had finished Chloe ran into the room. She yelled that Tess had gotten poisoned.

He remembered demanding Clark take her to the hospital. He remembered rushing to get changed and then speeding to the hospital. He remembered the fear on her face and by consequence, the fear that gripped him. He hadn't been able to fall asleep. And even when he did it was a nightmare of his life without her. Or her dying. Her funeral. But overall it just ran together in a blur of fear that was worse than anything he'd ever felt before.

It didn't matter. She was fine now. And now he had to go talk to everyone else. He drove to Watchtower. Chloe was working and Bruce was lounging around talking to her. When he noticed that Oliver walked in he asked, "How's she doing?"

"She's fine," Oliver replied shortly.

"Did you ask her?" Chloe asked.

"She's coming."

"You gonna tell her?"

"Yeah."

"Look, man," Bruce said, "I know you're worried. But she said she's ok," he encouraged.

"She wouldn't say if she wasn't," Oliver argues. Even they knew that. Tess thought she was supposed to be too strong to let anything get her. And that meant she wouldn't tell him either, no matter how much he wanted her to.

Chloe turns to face Oliver with a hand on her hip. "She might not, but she also wouldn't risk her health so you wouldn't worry." Chloe was right. Tess was stubborn. But she's still smart and wouldn't be stupid about something like this. It didn't ease his tension though.

"You're right. But," he took a deep breath, "she was so scared. And there was nothing I could do to help." He remembered seeing the fear grip her face and the worst part was that she would do nothing but toss her head, his indication that she wasn't fighting, because she didn't know to. And how can you win a battle you're not fighting.

"That's something you're going to have to get used to. There will be things you can't help. You have to trust her," Chloe admonished.

Oliver nodded, not entirely loving the idea. "You two going today?"

Both nodded. Oliver glanced at the clock on the wall. "I should go home and get changed. I wouldn't be so attractive if I wore the same clothes two days in a row," he joked, knowing no one would probably even notice. Tess would've on a normal day but probably not today.

The next problem is figuring out how to tell your unofficial girlfriend that you're actually a vigilante that kissed her before he was set to meet her. Yeah, no way this could go badly.

He drove home, imagining her reaction. Ranging from an angry "You played me!" to a passionate kiss and everything in between. He got changed and left again to go pick her up, running through different scenarios and options.

When he got to her apartment he knocked on the door and she opened it. She was dressed casually, as they were only going to a diner or cafe or something like that, nothing fancy. And yet, he was still stunned for a moment. He realized that it'd be very difficult to live in the same house if every time he saw her he couldn't breath for a moment. Cause of death: Suffocation due to presence of girlfriend.

"Let me just get my bag," she said. She turned, leaving Oliver in the doorway. She called back, "You don't have to stand in the doorway. You can come in."

She seemed almost back to her normal self. Almost. She still looked a little pale and tired. But she didn't seem scared or skittish. She had her normal air confidence that had a way of putting him at peace. Of course, it was probably a facade but he would like to think he would be able to tell.

She was taking longer than he thought she would so he just took a seat on couch. Then he noticed some papers on the table. He shouldn't have looked, and he knew that as he was doing it. But he saw Lex's signature and his curiosity was peaked.

It was headed 33.1. He knew what Lex did there. He quickly checked to make sure that she wasn't coming around the corner before picking it up. He scanned it briefly. He didn't have to look all that hard. He got the general gist pretty quickly. She was still tracking all the meteor freaks.

Oliver looked up at nothing, staring into space and momentarily forgetting the events of the night before. All he could think was that he had trusted her. Even when she didn't deserve it he had given her a chance, the benefit of the doubt. She came around the corner and saw him holding the paper and staring in shock.

He knew she was there but he couldn't look at her. He didn't know how she could stand to face anyone. He had used every excuse in and out of the book for her, but now, this was proof. There were no excuses for this. How do you forget this? Now could he look at her? A little voice in the back of his mind asked the counteracting question. How could he not?

"Oliver, listen to me-"

"Why should I? So you can lie to me again?" He was outraged. But more than that, he was hurt. And those two lead to an extreme anger that led to an outburst.

"I need you to hear-"

"I don't want to hear anything you have to say." He said storming out. He was fuming. Eventually when the initial anger died down he would just hurt and would need a stiff drink but for right now, what he needed what to hurt something.

He sent out a text, so he didn't have to go into detail, saying neither he nor Tess would be coming to lunch. At that moment, he couldn't talk to anyone about anything much less about Tess.