Oliver knew he needed to talk to her. He couldn't just communicate with her as Green Arrow. That just wasn't the makings of a healthy relationship. So he went to the Daily Planet the next morning and headed straight up to her office. He stood in the doorway and waited for her to notice him as this might be one of the only peaceful shots he'll get of her for the next few months. As Oliver that is.
Those green eyes were trained on the paper in one hand and flicked to the paper she was taking notes on, pen poised on the paper. Her brilliant red hair tumbled down past her shoulders, framing her beautiful face.
And then she noticed him, seemingly without looking up. Her eyes flicked to him and settled on his eyes, baring into them with her usual intensity. "Here for round 2?" she asked easily, stoney facade stubbornly in place. But then she went back to ignoring him and read something on her computer.
"Actually, I'm here to apologize," he admitted. She tore her eyes away from the screen and the emerald orbs fixed on him in slight confusion, waiting for an explanation.
"That's new," she swung the chair around and got out of it, going to get herself a drink ignoring the elephant that was growing in the room, "am I even trustworthy enough to hear something as rare as that?" Really, she was extraordinarily nervous and slightly scared. But he wouldn't know that. Not if she had any way of preventing it.
She must have been even more hurt than he originally thought. When she was hurt she always went on the offense. Her back was to him, making it slightly easier to apologize. "You didn't deserve what I said. I'm sorry."
She froze. She hadn't expected that. What's worse is she couldn't come up with a retort for that. She wanted things to go back to their banter. It was easy, simple. And she couldn't get hurt. It was safe. At least with the banter she knew where they stood. But after everything...she just wasn't sure. And that bothered her. "Don't be," she said venomously, turning to face him, "It showed me how fragile the trust was."
"Let's not do this," Oliver pleaded, "be honest with me."
Tess was now on a roll and wasn't able to stop even if she wanted to. To some extent once she starts and gets her bearings, she's a bulldozer and doesn't care about anyone's feelings who get in the way, including hers. That was a problem she had been trying to work on for a while now, but to no avail. Thus, she responded how her instincts told her to. She knew she would regret it later but she said it anyway, ending the conversation. "Regardless of whether I am or not, you won't believe me. So, what's the point?"
Oliver could take a hint. He knew she was still hurt so she wasn't going to let him in, no matter what. But the thing was, she didn't fight the way most people do when they're hurt. She's supposed to call him names that don't make sense and yell about how much she hates him and he wouldn't understand it. But that'd be better than this. He understood this. And she hit where it hurt. Her fury was cold, sharp, and laser-like. She was extraordinarily calm and therefore she knew how to hit and precisely where, and just how to word it. And that was the most difficult part.
But if she did fight the way most do, she wouldn't be her. And he wouldn't be in this predicament in the first place.
As he was walking down the hall, he passed Lois, who had could tell he wasn't in the mood to talk. She followed her instincts toward Tess' office and leaned against the doorway. Tess was staring down at her drink, but not really seeing it, lost in thought. Lois could practically see her gears turning.
She knew better than to interrupt Tess and her plotting session but did so anyway against her better judgement. A problem, she knew but not one that she put forth an effort to fix. "You shouldn't be so hard on him. Yeah, he's kind of a hothead but he would have come back to you."
Tess looked up at Lois, her frosty facade still firmly in place though, against Tess' will was thawing and Lois could see the beginnings of desperate honesty lingering behind those cold orbs. "Why do you think that?"
Lois prepared herself to say something to the woman she couldn't be in the same room with for more than 3 minutes without a brawl occurring that she hadn't said aloud to anyone else, ever. Something that had hurt up until this point. Something that she tried to deny for a long time even to herself. "Oliver talks in his sleep."
Tess didn't even have time to come up with a snappy remark before her impulse reaction kicked in. "What?" Tess was searching for a relevance somewhere, anywhere as to what that could possibly mean. But she was coming up with...nothing. Nothing other than the fact that she had seen him sleep, or heard in this case, which certainly wasn't having the desired affect. "Of course she did," Tess mentally berated herself, "you're not his only former flame." But that didn't wipe away the pain either.
"I didn't know what it meant at first. I mean it made no sense and was completely random. But when you showed up it made sense. Cause, you're Mercy." She had heard him say it in his sleep multiple times and it hadn't made sense. She had mulled it over and come up with only one explanation..that is until he heard his affectionate nickname. She just assumed he had nightmares. Nope, he just dreamed of her. That had stung for a while but she was surprisingly ok with that now. She owed that much to Clark.
Tess had a feeling where this was going but she decided that that was hope talking. "He would say one word over and over in his sleep. Mercy. At first I thought he was begging for mercy but most people don't look serene when begging for their life. In my experience," Lois explained at Tess' confused look. At this point Lois just assumed that she was focused on not recognizing Oliver's feelings. Which frustrated her to no end. She took a deep breath in and bit back the frustration that grew so easily in the reporter.
"That doesn't mean he would've come back. That was then. Now is...different." Tess' silent anger had dissipated into something more depressed. Her gaze was cast downward as she resisted the urge to scream.
"You know I didn't mean to fall in love with Smallville. He was just a farmboy that had this army brat falling head over heels. There was no logical reason for it. He had no edge. But I fell." Realizing she was babbling she shook her head. For the second time Tess looked up in confusion. Lois berated herself. Wow she was not good at this. "My point is it doesn't have to make sense. And even though he may not agree with some of things you do, that doesn't mean he doesn't love you." Feeling satisfied by her inspirational speech, Lois turned to leave, praying to whatever deity that was listening thay she didn't get called back.
Tess didn't say anything, just let it settle in her mind. Lois paused, and looked over her shoulder, figuring she might as well go out with a bang. "When we broke up, he said that he never regretted leaving anyone. But I know that billionaire well enough to know when he's lying. He asked if this was the moment he would regret for the rest of his life. I said yes, but I was wrong, and I do not admit that easily. Look, I don't know what happened between you and Ollie originally, but that was the moment he has regretted and probably will regret for the rest of his life. I'm not gonna tell you what to do, Tess, but don't make this your moment." With that Lois turned and left, hoping something she said hit home and grateful for that bit of divine inspiration.
Tess wasn't sure how much Lois knew about them. Whether she was holding off information for her sake or for dramatic effect or if Oliver had really never talked about it, but she did know something about Oliver Queen. "Lois," she called out.
Lois was slightly surprised. After all, whenever anyone else said something that dramatic they didn't get called back. Just her luck. She was still wondering where she came up with that whole speech, and hoping she had the ability to wing one last dramatic exit. Even she was willing to admit that was not likely. "What did he tell you?"
"Nothing," she answered bluntly, "but that's the key." Nailed it. That's just as efficient of an exit. Hopefully this time she'll let her make it. She strutted out, hair flying backward, pleased with herself, the entire time still hoping for Tess to let her exit.
She did. Tess was too deep in thought to be even remotely aware of anything going on around her. No matter how much she hated it, Lois was right. Oliver never talked about what hurt. Even when they were happy memories that he loved to talk about, he didn't do it. On nearly no circumstances. You had to ask, and depending on how deep the wound is and how recent, it could take some convincing. And Lois was only a few months after...they parted ways.
She remembered him talking about his parents. His face would light up. He would talk faster than she had ever heard him. And he would smile. It was bright and genuine and excitedly boyish. Tess had always loved it on him.
She would listen intently, engulfing every word he said as he regaled her with the love stories she'd never gotten to hear as a child. She would ask questions and he would get even more excited, because it meant she was really listening. He never mentioned it on his own, but the reason he never talked about it was because he was afraid that they wouldn't care.
She knew because that's why she never talked about her childhood. At least, that was the reason then. Then she trusted people. Now she was worried that they would use it against her. But now she also missed the ability to tell people things. So many nights she and Oliver would stay up and just talk and she wouldn't watch what she said because she had felt safe with him.
She always had. When she cried he would wrap his arms around her and she would lose herself in him. She made him feel like nothing could touch her.
Someone knocked on the door. Tess' face went cold and her head snapped up from her drink. It was Chloe. "I can come back another time if you want."
Tess relaxed. Slightly. "No, that's fine," she said, moving to her desk. "What do you need?"
"I know we're not exactly close, but I heard that you and Oliver had a fight. And this sounded a lot better in my head, but I know you don't really have anybody, so if you need to talk..." Chloe stumbled awkwardly, hoping that she sounded better than she thought she did. Probably not but still, she could hope.
Tess was slightly stunned and didn't bother to hide it. "Um, I," she took a deep breathe, searching for words, "thank you." She had to wonder though. When did the Lane-Sulivan cousins care at all about her? She assumed they'd be with Oliver. Maybe the other night hit closer to home with them than she had expected.
"The only people I've really done this with are Clark, Lois, and Lana, and I've known them all my life, so I've never really done the...this part," Chloe attempted to explain her awkwardness. It had had been natural with them but this seemed kind of like too abrupt of a beginning. Nonetheless, she promised she would try. So she would push this if she had to, no matter how much Tess resisted.
"I'm sorry. I'm just...surprised," she admitted. Nobody, besides Oliver, had ever tried to reach out to her. Lois, she had a vague inkling of understanding. But Chloe...no she never saw this coming, not from her.
"Yeah, I just thought that you didn't really have anyone to talk to so you might want to talk." She froze, realizing she just insulted her in trying to explain herself and attempted to fix her mistake. "Not that you don't have any other friends, but I..."
Tess cut her off. "No, you're right. I don't. It's just kind of a fact I've grown used to." Sad. It sounded so pathetically sad when she said it out loud. It made her think she was strong for so long but out loud...it just made her seem pathetic.
Chloe was getting more comfortable with this now that the conversation had actually been initiated on her part to. Tess had begun to open up and that excited her. "You shouldn't have to."
"After a while you don't really think anything of it," Tess explained, hating how pathetic the words sounded out loud when they had been her tether for so long.
Chloe searched for words now. "What happened?"
"He didn't trust me," she stated simply, praying that she wouldn't have to divulge anymore. It was too fresh, too new, too painful to talk about now.
"Not now, I mean originally. Oliver and I got pretty close but he never talked about it, he'd talked about when he was with Lois but there seems to be a massive gap in his lifespan from when he got off the island and when he met us."
Tess hesitated, seeming a little wary. Chloe noticed this and explained a little further. "I'm not a threat to you, especially where Oliver is concerned." That was a far fetched idea, she inwardly scoffed. But maybe to the untrained eye...nah.
"He cheated on me," Tess replied simply. She no longer met Chloe's gaze. She had seen more of the floor today than she ever cared to. But anything was better than the most likely judging eyes of the petite blonde across the room.
"Was he at least honest with you about it?" Chloe tried seeing the bright side, only to be shut down.
Tess chuckled humorlessly and met her gaze, a ghost of her usual cold demeanor on her face, mirthless smirk and all. It just seemed...sadder somehow. "He didn't have to be. I walked in on it."
"What did he say?" Chloe was stunned. It was no wonder they never talked about it. Suddenly all the pieces fit into place. She always assumed Oliver was ashamed because of what Tess had become. She assumed that Tess just got unlucky and decided to get a job at Luthorcorp and rode the downward slope. But maybe there's more to Tess Mercer than meets the eye.
"I don't know. I turned around and went for a drink. When I got back he was gone. He had packed up his things and left. I didn't see him again until a few months ago." She couldn't tell you why she was telling what was arguably her arch nemesis all this. But maybe she just needed to open up to someone. And Lois' obvious want of a dramatic exit did not fit the profile.
Chloe's eyes were wide and her jaw had dropped at some point during the story. Oliver, the Green Arrow had cheated on his girlfriend of two years and then left without another word. She would certainly never look at him the same way again. "Honesty hour?" Chloe asked.
Tess nodded, needing to hear someone else be honest for a minute. She was sick of hearing her voice, especially with how weak it sounded. "I thought you were overreacting. Now, I think it was justified."
"I should've handled it better. There's no doubt about that," Tess retorted, not having the strength to defend herself. Besides she was beside herself with the self-disgust that usually only caught up to her at night. But she just didn't have the energy to fight it off.
"We all could've handled it better. I'm not saying it doesn't matter. But what matters more, is how we bounce back from it. And as much as I hate to admit it the best thing you two can do to do that is come together. He needs someone to turn to, that understands him. None of us do, he has his own demons to fight and you help him fight them, because you understand because you have them too. I don't mean to offend but you've obviously got your demons, we all do, and he helps you fight them, too. So what's the problem?" Chloe asked, getting more and more riled up, frustrated by the fact that seemed to blind to something that seemed so obvious to her.
"Unfortunately those demons get in the way more than any of us would have hoped," Tess admitted. Those demons, being hers, and his understandable distrust of them. But still, it pained her to think that he thought so little of her, especially after successfully convincing herself that she didn't care for so long.
"Then let him help you," Chloe encouraged. She felt she was reaching through and wasn't about to back down by the world's weakest excuse.
Tess looked unsure at first, but it was quickly replaced by a look of determination. She nodded. Chloe smiled and stepped to the side, allowing Tess to leave. She brushed past her and headed towards Oliver's apartment. Chloe happily followed, but kept her distance so as not to tick her off.
After coming up with forty five million different ways to approach this, she realized that no matter what she planned she would forget it, besides if she thought about that then she would think about how she got here and how hurt she was, and that would only make her bitter which wouldn't help matters. So, she decided to let instinct take over. She turned on the radio and let the music drown her thoughts.
It didn't work. Instead every word that reached her ears somehow connected to Oliver. Her heart welled up in her throat again and she turned it off. After a few minutes of silence and preferring to just feel instead of think she pulled into a parking space outside of his apartment.
Next thing she knew she was standing outside his apartment and ringing the bell. He pulled the door open and locked eyes with her. Her breath got caught in her throat and she had to remind herself to breathe. Neither could say anything. Neither knew what to say.
They found they had lost the ability to speak as emotion rode their gaze, making their feelings clear. "I'o m sorry," was all she was able to get out.
He still couldn't speak, and somehow that translated into allowing instincts and emotions to take control. He kissed her. Hungrily, as though she was the breath he had been trying to catch since he was born.
She didn't pull away. She had been running for so long from her feelings and thoughts that he allowed her to feel. She held on, afraid that the moment they broke apart he would remember her bitter rejection and tell her he didn't want someone so cruel.
Only, he didn't. When he did pull away he still stared at her as she waited with bated breath for his reaction. To her surprise, he smiled. "You know, maybe I should get you mad at me more often."
She smiled back at him, now reassured that this was and always had been the end game. There was nothing left for them to mess up. They'd been through enough that they would last the rest of their lives. Undeniably, there would be little tiffs here and there, but that would happen anywhere. And if they all ended like that, then they would not only survive them, but make them stronger.
But that was far from Oliver's thoughts. How was he supposed to explain to her about the "other guy?" How could he tell her to trust him when he just got her back?
A/N: unfortunately my update time only goes downhill from here. I've had up until here written already so I just had to edit it but from here on out I have to write and then post. Another thing that is not so fortunate is that I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. I am hoping that a bit of inspiration randomly hits me at some point soon but I can't garuntee that. I'm trying to get my motivation up but again no garuntees. I have a few other things I want to get up featuring our favorite redhead among other women awesome like her so I hope you guys check it out though you may have to follow me or just check regularly. Reviewa would be great!