Wow...so this chapter was really hard for me to write. I must have started it at least 10 times! I think Kate arriving has really confused Amy...and me (and I writing the story!). Anyway, I finally finished with the end I wanted.
Amy read Karma's message and asked herself the same question WAS she too late? Back in her room, just a few moments ago it hadn't felt that way, but seeing Kate it reminded Amy about her life in New York. Reminded her about her life with Kate.
The emotions Amy felt around Karma scared her. She didn't trust herself around her. Seeing her again had made all these feelings bubble to the surface and Amy was really struggling to find a solution to the problem. The problem being she had a girlfriend, yet she had so very wanted to kiss Karma. To be kissed by Karma. To feel those lips on hers after all these years. To have sex with Karma like she had spent so many nights fantasising about when she was younger.
Amy hated this. Hated having these feelings for Karma because she shouldn't be. She had a girlfriend! A girlfriend who at that very moment was sat in the next room with her mum.
Amy read the message once more and then deleted it. If she ignored it...maybe it would go away. Maybe the feelings Amy had been having towards Karma since she had been home would vanish and everything could go back to how they were before she had played Karma's voicemail. Before her confession. Before the moment Amy had nearly kissed her.
That's what Amy needed to do. She needed to put some space between her and Karma and then she would stop thinking about her. She just needed to get through the funeral and then she could go back to how things were.
Amy put her phone away and headed back over to the living room where her mum and Kate were now located.
"You OK?" Kate asked as she watched Amy. Amy knew she was probably acting a bit weird
"Absolutely" Amy replied chirpily, but she knew from Kate's glance that she had convinced her.
Amy's mum announced that she had an early start tomorrow and after saying goodnight left Amy and Kate alone.
Amy poured herself another glass of wine.
"Woah..." Kate said "someone is thirsty!"
Amy knew Kate was probably right, but she didn't care. She needed the drink to calm her nerves.
"Yeah well ummmm the last couple of days have been a bit..."
"A bit what?" Kate asked suspiciously.
"...a bit full on." Amy replied.
"How so?"
Amy paused before answering. She wondered how much to actually confess.
She played the conversation in her head:
"Well since I've been back Karma has told me she lied the night I told her I loved her and has basically been lying ever since. She told me she loved me, has always loved me, but was too scared to say anything as she didn't want to be gay or 'different'. She kissed me, but it's OK..I pushed her away. But then I got angry at her for ruining our friendship...we both cried...she wrote a song for me and I told her that I thought I was falling back in love with her. To top it all off, right before you arrived...I nearly kissed her!
Hmmmm maybe not.
Amy settled for "It's just been a bit harder than I thought it would be." She paused "you know...Karma has been really upset. She..she hasn't been dealing with it well...she needs help. She needs to see someone who can help her deal with her feelings." Amy hoped Kate would buy her reason.
"Jeez...it must be really hard to understand..to lose both your parents." Kate said "she umm must be happy to have you here"
"I guess." Amy replied "Welllll.."Amy changed the subject..."I'm happy to have you here" Amy said as she reached down and picked Kate's hand up.
Kate smiled "Well I'm really pleased to be here too."
"How long are you staying?
"Well I guess that's up to you. I was kinda thinking that maybe I could whisk you away for a couple of days...after the funeral and all that."
"Wow...that..that sounds great!" Amy replied, not 100% convincing.
"Hmmm well you could sound a little more happy about it!" Kate replied back, clearly disappointed with Amy's lack of enthusiasm.
Amy felt really bad. She didn't want to be a bad girlfriend, but she had lied to Kate. She needed to start making an effort...to start being a better girlfriend and stop thinking about someone else. A few days away with Kate would maybe be just wanted she needed to get things back on track.
"I'm sorry" Amy apologised. "A trip away sounds amazing. I think I'm just a bit drained and maybe a early night is required".
"It feels a bit weird being in your bedroom" Kate said when they had finished their drinks and headed upstairs.
"Weird how?" Amy asked
"Oh I don't know...just funny that this is where you spent your childhood."
"I guess it's a bit weird having my New York life meet my Texas life" Amy said agreeing with Kate a bit
"I'm mean they are pretty different" she added.
Kate pulled Amy into her arms "and so which one do you prefer?" She asked as she placed her lips on Amy's.
Amy tried to enjoy the kiss, but she couldn't it felt strange to be kissing Kate in her bedroom so soon after nearly kissing Karma. Amy wriggled out of Kate's arms
"Hey I was enjoying that!" Kate pleaded as she pulled a sad face
"I know you were...but need I remind you that you were just this morning put on a sex ban!" Amy joked. Although she was secretly pleased to have a excuse to pull out of the kiss. She was also aware that she hadn't actually answered Kate's question.
"You're kidding right?" Kate asked exasperatedly
"Nope!" Amy said as she walked pulled off her top and started undoing her jeans.
"Your behaviour this morning was not acceptable..." Amy continued not missing the irony of what she was saying.
Kate moved towards Amy who was now just standing in her bra and pants. Kate smiled and trying to pull Amy in for a kiss.
"Oh come on babe...don't do this to me...I flew all this way to surprise you and your seriously going to put me on a sex ban?" Kate groaned "and how evil of you to stand there looking so fucking sexy as you tell me the bad news!"
Amy laughed at Kate's words."well you need to be taught a lesson." Amy pointed to the bathroom "maybe you should take a cold shower!"
"Orrrrr maybe you should give me a chance to make it up to you!" Kate said in a way that she knew Amy would find it hard to resist.
Amy walked over and planted a kiss on Kate's mouth and conceded slightly "Hmmm well I think it's going to a lot of making up."
"I'm happy with that!" Kate replied. "Let me just go brush my teeth OK?" Kate pulled out her wash bag from her suitcase and headed to the bathroom.
Amy flopped down onto her bed. What was she doing? Why was she fighting the advances of her girlfriend? Why couldn't she just go with the flow...enjoy the moment?
Just then Amy felt the bed buzz as Kate's phone when she had thrown on the bed singled a message. Amy looked over and saw on the screen Shane's name displayed and the first sentence...
'What happened? Did you get there in time? Did you stop them?'