I need to eat something before I pass out, but I had to do it! I can't stop! Someone send help!

DarylDixon'sLover: You're really going to love this one if you thought that was sweet!

Tiphanie: Yup. She's safe for now. And I'm glad you like their development. I really didn't want to rush it. I still feel like I kind of am, but I'm trying to slow down. And it's your fault why I wrote this chapter. So thank you for inspiring it! I think you'll like it a lot.

linzeejee: I don't know how many more are coming out today, this might be the last. I'm super tired and I need to eat, but knowing me there might be one...maybe two more. Depends on how inspired I get.

Enjoy!

Bucky stared down at his hands as Olivia left, closing the door behind her, the terrified look back in her eyes. He had been so sure. So sure he was awake, the doctors surrounding him, ready to wipe him again. He hadn't thought when she touched him...he broke his promise. He had hurt her again. He had ruined all the progress they'd made. And now she was out there with the crew. They weren't bad people. Just working, getting from one place to the next. But he would have felt better if she were with him. Where he could ensure she really was safe. He didn't understand the feeling he got when he thought about her possibly being in danger. It made him sick, nervous, like he wanted to tear the ship apart looking for her. But she wouldn't come now. He'd messed things up again.

He sank down on the bed, the mattress still warm from where she'd been laying. He laid down, kicking off his boots before curling up on the mattress. He hadn't been on a bed for a long time. So long he forgot what it felt like. The soft, plush material under his side. The pillow under his head unusual. It smelled like her. She smelled nice, he thought. The blanket was thin, but it was soft, and it felt nice. He felt safe, laying there. Something he forgot he could feel. He was a predator. A killer. He didn't have to feel safe because he never felt threatened. He could take care of himself if he had to.

HYDRA had made him forget what fear was. He may have felt it before they wiped him, but he never remembered it after. He never remembered anything after. They'd turned him into something horrible. Taken away his identity, and shoved someone else in his skin. He wasn't Bucky anymore. When the man on the bridge...Steve...had called him that, it had awoken something in him. Something he didn't remember feeling. It had compromised the mission, and so he'd left. And HYDRA had taken it away from him again. He'd started to remember. Falling, cold, waking up different. With a metal arm. Alive. They'd frozen him, over and over again. He was stronger than he remembered. Everything was in pieces, and he just wanted to remember.

Steve had called him a friend. His best friend. And Bucky had saved him. He didn't know why, but he had done it. And then he'd saved Olivia. Maybe it had been a mistake. Maybe he should have told her to run. She was scared of him, more so now than she was before. But they would have found her. They would have killed her. Slowly. Painfully. Torturing her, because of him. And he couldn't let that happen. He had to keep her safe. He had to take care of her.

But he didn't quite understand why.

Bucky woke up when the door to the room slammed shut. He heard Olivia curse lightly, wincing as it echoed around the room for a moment. Bucky laid still, not wanting to scare her by moving too fast. Or moving at all. He wasn't sure what time it was, or how long he'd been asleep for. He stilled his breathing as she approached the bed, a bowl of something in her hand. It was steaming, and smelled good, but he didn't move. She sat it on the table, turning around to move to the chair.

She tucked her legs under her as she sat, watching him. He could feel her eyes on him, curious. He finally sat up when he decided she wasn't going to run when he moved.

"The crew gave me some to bring to you. You were asleep for most of the day." She said, watching as he grabbed the bowl, inspecting the contents. "I think it's supposed to be chili." She said, flipping on the light, both of them squinting at the intrusion. "Or something like that. I'm not sure what they called it. Some of them don't speak English."

So she had been with the crew. She seemed more relaxed now, but there was still an edge to her, the way her eyes darted back to him every few seconds. Watching his every move, waiting for him to attack.

"I'm sorry." He said, his voice rough from sleep. "I didn't-"

"It was my fault." She said, interrupting him. "I shouldn't have just grabbed you like that. You looked like you were having a nightmare, but I didn't want you to have a stiff neck when you woke up. I should have thought it through a little better." She shrugged, looking to the floor.

"I shouldn't have attacked you." He said before spooning some chili into his mouth. It was a little bland, but it was real food. Something he hadn't had in a long time either.

"It was your instinct. It still is." She said, looking back up at him. "You can't help it. You spent god knows how long living like that. I'm not going to blame you for doing something you can't help."

He felt something swell in his chest. It was odd, made him feel strange. He frowned, looking down at the chili. He was starting to feel again, but he didn't have a name to put to what it was. He knew he'd felt it before. A long time ago. A very long time ago, but he wasn't quite sure what it was now. All of these emotions were so strange to him. All of these feelings coming on at once. It was confusing.

"Are you okay?" He jumped slightly when he spoke, making her jump as well. No one had asked him that in a long time. "Do you want something else to eat? No one's going to make you eat, I mean you should, but I'm not your mother, so I can't tell you what to do. You're older than me so you should be the one in charge-"

"You sure talk a lot, don't you?" He asked, a smile coming to his face.

"Sorry." She said, blushing, pulling her knees to her chest. "Nervous habit." She chewed on her lip, avoiding his gaze. "If I ever annoy you, just tell me to shut up. I know I ask a lot of questions but I'm a curious child. That's what got me into this mess in the first place."

"What did you do, anyways?" He asked before taking another bite of chili. "What made your father send me after you?"

"I, uh, broke into his office because I was curious because he never told me what he did and I wanted to know. I may have found out about HYDRA and seen the plans for Project Insight. The helicarriers. But I didn't read anything. All I saw was the name, and the helicarriers. I ran away because I knew HYDRA was an ex-Nazi organization and I was scared. So I ran. And my dad thought I was going to sell information and reveal their plan before it got started. So he sent you after me to bring me home."

Guilt filled him at her words. If he would have known any better. If he would have known what was waiting for her when she returned...he wouldn't have brought her back. He would have let her run. But he didn't know better. He was still a machine, getting told what to do, and obeying those commands. Completing his missions without question.

"You don't have to feel guilty." She said, making him look up at her in surprise. "You didn't know any better. Hell, I thought you were a robot when I found out you had a metal arm. A cyborg or something. There was no way someone human could move like that. But you are human. You were just buried." She shrugged. "It happens to the best. Even me."

He noted the sadness in her voice, the strange clenching happening in his chest again. He quickly shoveled more chili in his mouth, wanting to keep the wetness in his eyes from falling. Tears. He'd seen them on her. When he'd been...the second time. He'd seen them a lot on her, and he hated it. He'd seen them in her eyes this morning, and he hated himself for doing that to her.

"You sure think a lot, don't you." She said, and he realized he'd been staring into his chili again. "That's okay. You've got a lot to think about. I'll try to be quiet." She rested her chin on her arms, which were folded over her knees.

You don't have to. He thought. He was remembering more, feeling more when he was around her. But he kept quiet, finishing up his chili as she tried to be quiet, but failed.