Now that the every-raging *curse*storm that has been my life so far this year seems to have settled down -

Let us hop back on this wagon, shall we?

Ch 16

…

It all felt a little too surreal for Ryou. But writing back and forth about trivial things with Marik was the closest thing to a breakthrough he'd had. The others were cheering him on every little step of the way, and anytime he ended up stuck with words, they were quick to suggest ideas.

As Tristan had delivered the journal back and forth through the hall, Tea had offered every redundant encouragement she could think of.

"Don't focus so much on what you're writing," she said. "Just keep it going, that's the important part."

When she traded off with Tristan, the taller boy sat with Ryou and did the same. "If you feel you're losing yourself to uneasiness, just look at what he's saying to you. This is the Marik you need to stay focused on. Right here."

Ryou winced a little.

"Just remember this person, and remember the good times you had with him before all of this. You said he was always nice to you before. So hold onto that. And keep saying his name, even if only in your head. Affiliate it with this guy."

It was all becoming a headache. But he knew he ought to follow their advice. So they continued to pass it back and forth until visiting hours came to a close. Marik's latest message read: So do we do this tomorrow as well?

Ryou answered: I think we should- he erased the last two words and tried again – I think that would be good. It might be a little while in between without someone to be our messenger, but I'm willing to wait if you are.

He stopped and looked it over. Tristan held out his hand for the journal, but Ryou wrote more first.

Speaking of waiting, your sister told me you asked to go back home to Egypt. I understand that, and I want you to do what's best for your health – but if you think you're up for it, would you consider staying a bit longer so we might work at this?

…

Marik reread the request again and again; 'would you consider staying'. He closed his eyes and held the open journal to his heart. There was hope. Merciful gods above, there was hope at last! The agonizing hole inside his chest filled with it. He didn't care how difficult it would be to mend all of this, as long as it was possible! He gave the book a final squeeze before answering.

Yes, Ryou, I will stay. If you are willing to wait, then I will wait too. As long as it takes.

He passed the journal back for the final time that night, and let Ishizu rejoice all over him. Odion's happiness was no less great, though he was a bit more restrained about it. Still, they embraced him and congratulated him and offered any and all help they could.

...

After Ryou's morning routines with the nurses were finished, Odion and Ishizu took up the role as messenger. It was frequent, yet inconsistent enough that Ryou decided to just keep his door open to skip all of the knocking; letting them come and go as they needed to. However before he could manage that, he had written to Marik explaining that he was not ready to meet face to face yet and so he must give plenty of warning if Marik intended to leave his room. Ryou had more than once imagined the horrific fit he would endure if the familiar blonde's face simply passed by his window unexpectedly. Let alone with the door open.

Marik had agreed to this, saying he most likely wouldn't leave except when his siblings wanted to take him outside. And they would take alternative routes so as not to pass Ryou's room; as well as give notice.

Ryou's head fell back on his pillow in displeasure yet again. He hated that he needed to make such demands.

…

"I'm really proud of you, Ryou," Serenity said over the phone that afternoon. "I'm sure that wasn't easy for you, but you did it. And now the both of you are that much closer to healing."

"Thank you," Ryou said. "But to be honest, I still have my doubts."

"Why is that?"

"I haven't been able to discuss the important things with him this way. It just seems too…" she heard an aggravated sigh.

"It really is something that ought to be settled face to face," she said with understanding.

"Yes, and that's the part I'm still struggling with."

"I see."

There was a moment of silence. Then Ryou spoke in a lower voice, "I get to go for a walk tomorrow."

"They're letting you up?" she asked with some encouragement.

"Mm hmm. I can't be sure for how long, but it's a chance to finally get out of this room I've been stuck in."

"That'll do you good. I hope the weather's nice tomorrow."

"Even if it isn't, I wouldn't care. I'd be fine seeing some rain if that were the case. I'm not able to go outside yet anyway."

"It's still progress," Serenity smiled into the phone. "And I'm very happy for you."

She heard a soft chuckle. "Thanks."

"Try not to let the other stuff get to you, okay? You've been doing fine. You both just need some more time, and you'll figure it all out."

"I hope so."

"Tea told me he's looking more enthused than he was," she added brightly. "I guess when you started writing to him, it gave him hope."

"I suppose."

"You don't think so?"

"I think we're dancing around the facts that we need to settle because I can't get myself to go over them like this. Passing notes back and forth."

"Well give yourself some credit, Ryou," she said. "This would be tough for anyone to face. And you're doing something about it now instead of ignoring it, and that's good. If you're really not ready to see him in person yet, then you're not ready."

"I've tried so many times to think of how I could," he said. "I even asked his brother how he could still look him in the eye after he'd returned to his senses all those times."

"What did he say?"

"That he's his brother… And the most important person in his life. So nothing he could do would ever keep Odion away from him." Ryou sighed. "And as touching as that is, I don't have that kind of connection with him. I don't have that same determination to stay connected."

"Hmm," Serenity hummed, more to let him know she was still listening. She didn't have a response for that.

"Can I tell you something, Serenity?"

"Of course you can. Anything."

"I've been trying to see my own perspective on this from every angle, to try and determine exactly how I feel about it all. And come to terms with whatever that may be."

"Mm hmm?"

"And… I think I can fully admit now that… I am afraid."

"Yes, I imagine so."

"But not just in the way everyone thinks." He said. "It's true that I'm worried he might flip out and attack me again, but that's not everything."

"What are you afraid of?" she asked carefully.

"I'm afraid of what he's already done to me."

She frowned a little. Wasn't that what they were talking about?

"I'm afraid of the panic that overtakes me when he feels too close. I can't help it. I don't know how to stop it, or keep it under control."

"Ohh," she said.

"When I heard his voice on the phone," Ryou muttered. "Just that one word… I don't even know how to describe what happened to me. My brain just seized up and wouldn't let me think clearly. I was barely able to call out to my other half clearly in my mind."

"Mm."

"And if one little word over the phone can do that, I don't dare put myself in the same room with him, let alone look at him. I might give myself a heart attack and that would be the end of it."

Serenity winced and held the phone with both hands, "Please don't say that, none of us want that to happen."

"It's a genuine concern I have," Ryou said. "Not only that, but what damage would such a thing do to him? If I were to face him and lose control like I did… I can't begin to imagine the damage that could do."

Serenity looked sadly at the floor, digging her toes into the carpet.

"Can I ask what it was about his voice that made you panic?" she asked softly.

He made a few faint noises in thought. "I remember trying to say hello. Just that simple word. I kept urging it to come out but I couldn't speak. And then when he said it… I remembered the last time I had heard him say it. It was when he was looking for me after I had run up the stairs to get away from him."

"Oh… So it was the word then? Or his voice with it, or – I'm trying to understand."

"I really don't know how to describe it. It was probably both of those things. It's as if everything about him reminds me of that house. Or following him there. And once I feel myself go back there -"

"Then the panic takes you," she finished.

"Yes."

"That's awful."

"I've tried to think of what he might be able to say that would somehow keep me rooted to the present but… I haven't got any ideas. And I'm afraid to look into his eyes."

She didn't answer, simply waited.

"The last time I saw his eyes he was- beyond crazed. Beyond maniacal. His eyes looked lethal, and heartless. He really wanted to do worse than kill me."

"I promise you Ryou, he doesn't look like that anymore."

"I don't know that it will make a difference though. His voice over the phone wasn't like it had been, and yet it brought me back all the same. And he looked normal enough when I followed him down those back roads… Just because he isn't struggling across the room to get at me doesn't necessarily mean I'll feel safe. I've even gone so far as to imagine him being restrained when I see him… but that doesn't make me feel any better."

"Have you told him any of this?" she asked.

"No. I don't dare. If the state of his health was really plummeting so fast, I don't want to cause it to happen anymore."

She hesitated, toying with the hem of her shorts. "I'm glad you can still find it in yourself to care about him that much. I think that says a lot about you."

Silence on his end now. "I'm not without some bitterness."

"Well of course not, but you're not wishing death or pain on him, are you?"

Nothing.

"Ryou?"

"No." he answered. "I'm not."

"You'll come up with something, don't worry."

"Thank you for talking with me. I'll see you later, Serenity."

"Okay, goodbye." She let the phone hover for a moment, the dial tone ringing dully in her ear, before she hung up.

She let out a sad sigh as her mother came into room. "What wrong, sweetheart?" she asked.

"Hmm?" Serenity looked up at her and smiled. "Nothing, I'm fine."

"Who was that on the phone?"

"It was Ryou. He just wanted to talk for a while."

"Is he doing better?"

"Mm hmm. He wanted me to tell you thank you for the poster and for the classical CD's."

Ms. Wheeler smiled. "I'm glad he likes them. It's amazing how much music can change an atmosphere."

"That's true."

"I can't imagine having to spend so much time in the hospital like that. I could barely stand it when you were stuck in bed with your eyes still covered in bandages after surgery."

"Well at least Ryou has his eyesight," she smiled, grateful for the fact, as well as grateful for her own good fortune. She remembered wearing those bandages over her eyes and wondering if she'd ever be able to - she suddenly gave a loud gasp.

Her mother jumped in alarm. "What? What's wrong?"

Serenity stared blankly ahead. "That could work."

"What? Serenity, what's happening?"

"Mama!" she took her mother by the arms and smiled brightly at her. "You're brilliant!"

"I'm – huh?"

"Where's Joey?"

"I-In his room, I think he's taking a nap?" She trailed off as her daughter quickly got up and rushed down the hall to her brother's room.

A quick knock and Serenity immediately entered without waiting.

"Joey!" she said, flicking on his light.

The blonde jumped in his bed and turned to look at her over his shoulder. "Serenity!"

"I got an idea!" she beamed.

"Didn't we have a talk about waiting for clearance before entering a guy's room?" a tiny blush rose in his cheeks. "I coulda' been – uh… sleepin'."

Serenity tilted her head innocently, "Were you not sleeping?"

"I was… Never mind." He hadn't actually been in the middle of anything, so decided to drop it. "Just wait for a 'come in' next time, will ya?"

"Okay. But I gotta tell you something!" she excitedly hopped up onto his bed.

"Alright, alright," he said, raising himself to a sitting position. "What's your idea?"

"A blindfold!" she said excitedly.

He blinked vacantly at her. "Wha-?"

"For Marik!"

"Marik? I don't follow ya."

"I was on the phone with Ryou and he told me he's scared to see Marik."

"Yeah -"

"He said he doesn't think he can look him in the eye because the last time he did, Marik had looked completely crazy and dangerous. But we could tell Marik to cover his eyes with a blindfold and then Ryou might be able to see him!"

Joey thought about it. "I … guess."

Her smile faded. "You don't think so?"

"It's not dat," Joey said, scratching his head. "But isn't he scared of more than just Marik's eyes?"

"Well yeah… But it could help, right?" she asked hopefully.

Joey shrugged. "Maybe. I dunno. We can ask Ryou what he thinks. At dis point any idea's better than none at all."

…

The idea was suggested amongst the group, and Ryou received a brief call during a one-on-one visit with Yugi. As expected, it did little to raise his hopes, but he acted appreciative all the time. After a short talk he hung up and turned to the champion duelist.

"Where were we?"

"We were talking about trust," Yugi said.

"Mm," Ryou looked down at himself. He'd finally been allowed to change into pajama bottoms and a soft cotton shirt. And the room was warm enough he had no need to cover up with the blankets now. So he sat up on his own, a little slumped, getting his back muscles used to holding him up again.

"I think you're going to really need it to move forward." Yugi said.

"Mm hmm," Ryou mumbled, a little dismissively.

"You've shown trust with Tea and Serenity, and that's fantastic. It really is. But now I think we ought to focus it in others too."

"'Others' being?"

Yugi didn't answer. He simply stared back at him, as though expecting him to answer his own question.

"I'm not trying to be difficult," Ryou said quietly. "Just narrowing it down to a focus. That's all."

Yugi nodded, "Well, that's something right there, isn't it? You need to find trust in multiple people… You said you feel cut off from us. I can understand that, but it's been some time now… Do you feel any different?"

"A little."

"With all of us or just the girls?"

"All of you."

"Does that help you feel better at all?"

Ryou's face twitched a little and he shrugged. "A bit. Yes."

Yugi took this in, studying the British teen. This clearly made Ryou uncomfortable as he wouldn't meet the other's eyes. Yugi looked down at his hands, thinking over his next words.

"I'm going to be direct with you on this," he said carefully. "I think you don't know how to trust me."

No response. No objection.

"I think that you go through to motions and you have faith that I'll do my best to help you. But you don't trust that it will matter in the end."

Ryou took a deep breath and worked to raise his head.

"You're right," he muttered, wiping his palms over his pants. "I've had to fend for myself for so long, it's hard for me to trust anyone. And you of all people?" He finally met Yugi's eyes. "How can I? You and I … We were mortal enemies before we were even born, when you think about it."

Yugi raised his eyebrows in acknowledgement. "There's some truth there, we can't change that. But, you know, we're not the same people. Whoever we were in our past lives… You've seen how different we are."

"And yet how similar."

"It's to be expected. But you are your own man, Ryou. Just like I am. Which takes me to my next point: I think you don't trust yourself either."

Ryou gave him an odd look.

"I think you don't trust that you can do the right thing even if you want to. I think –

"What's the right thing?"

"Anything. Anytime," Yugi opened his hands as though offering whatever example he liked. "You try to do right, I've seen you do it. But if and when it fails, you question yourself and wonder if you can ever really be your own man. Or if you're just a shadow of the person living inside you, fated to follow the same path."

He paused to let that sink in before continuing. "You don't trust in your own ability to defend yourself. And I think that even if you believe the rest of us can do it, you don't trust that we'll always be there when you need us."

Ryou looked a little hurt. "Well trust like that takes a long time to build doesn't it? Especially after so many times when it hasn't been."

Yugi nodded. "And that's exactly why we're here, Ryou. Why we've been here and why we've kept coming back."

"I know, I know," Ryou muttered. "You've said that."

"Well you believe me, right?"

Ryou fidgeted with the fabric of his bottoms some more.

Yugi waited. "Do you?"

"Yes…" Ryou murmured.

Silence stretched out between them.

"I do believe you," Ryou said quietly.

Yugi leaned his head to the side. "But?"

"Even if I do come to trust you... That doesn't make it a mutual feeling, does it?" He met the other's eyes again. "The thought keeps coming up in my mind. That you'll all never really trust me. Like Tristan reacted the other day when I asked for my Ring. He was certain I was up to no good. You've all had your reasons to be suspicious of me but... how long is it going to take before you aren't anymore?"

"Good question," Yugi said. "I imagine... as long as it takes for you not to be suspicious of us."

Ryou looked at him uncertainly.

"You keep waiting for us to get annoyed and abandon you, don't you? That's what's making a lot of this so hard for you." At Ryou's questioning look, he added, "The Pharaoh brought it to my attention. And once I considered it, it became easy to believe."

Ryou looked defeated. "It always seems to happen that way," he said softly. "People get called away or they get sick of me. Or they die... Bakura's the only one who's never left me," Ryou leaned back on his pillow. "And really, he never had the option."

A sad look crossed Yugi's face. "As I said before, I didn't know you felt that way all this time. But I'm aware now. And now I won't abandon you, I promise you that."

"What about," Ryou hesitated, "When they have to face each other again?" He looked back at Yugi. "It's going to happen eventually. We both know that."

Yugi nodded solemnly.

"We're going to be forced to choose a side one way or another. How much will our trust amount to then?"

"Only time will tell," Yugi answered quietly. "I've asked myself that same question many times. And you know what keeps coming to mind?"

Ryou shook his head.

"That we don't know when that will be. It could be in a month, it could be thirty years from now. We might all even be my grandpa's age when it happens. We can't know for sure. But we're here right now."

He looked hard into Ryou's eyes with all sincerity. "I have no doubt things will be difficult when that time comes, but the truth is - that fight is between the two spirits inside us. We can pick whatever side we want, or not. It doesn't change the fact that it's about them, not us. And if you're willing to, then I'm willing to put all of that aside and focus on our own situation."

Ryou's eyes shown against the room's light. Yugi scooted closer and held up a hand.

"Let's make a pact right now. No matter what happened in our past lives, and no matter where the Pharaoh and Bakura take us in the future, let's agree to be our own men. You and me. – It may get hard at times, but I give you my word that I'll stand by you for as long as you'll do the same for me. And we'll work through it together."

Ryou just stared at him, apparently stuck somewhere between amazement and uncertainty. Yugi held his gaze.

"This is something I can't share with anyone else, Ryou. Just you. You're the only one who will ever know exactly what this means."

He was dumbstruck, without a clue how to respond. Something they shared just between the two of them? Something that even Yugi's best friends of several years couldn't relate to? And he was offering to share it with him? Ryou looked down at the extended hand waiting for him. If this were happening at any other point in his life, he knew he'd feel Bakura's immediate objection. Declarations of heresy and refusal. But there was none at all. There was no voice inside. This was entirely his own decision to make. And now, after all these years… thinking Yugi didn't give a single care toward Ryou or whatever became of him… he sounded like he really meant this.

"So what do you say?" Yugi asked, bringing him up from his thoughts. "Will you trust me?"

Ryou opened his mouth to no words. He flexed his fingers and lifted his own hand – and stopped. He looked up, right into those deep purple eyes.

"Will -" he managed to get out. "Will you trust me?"

Now it was Yugi's turn to think. His face never changed but his eyes immediately began searching Ryou's; questioning and debating. No doubt asking himself some very similar questions.

Neither one of them looked away.

At last Yugi's focused stare relaxed and he gave a warm smile.

"Yes. I will."

Ryou felt his own mouth pulling up into a smile then. He reached out and shook Yugi's hand.

"Then I will too."

And in that moment, for the first time since he'd known Yugi Muto, Ryou Bakura knew that he really could. A small laugh erupted from him before he felt it coming.

"What?" Yugi asked.

"You've really got friendship speeches honed to a bafflingly sharp skill," Ryou said. "Just when I thought I'd heard every sort, you spring that on me."

Yugi laughed as well and scratched the back of his head. "What can I say?"

…

As the days went on, Ryou's health continued to improve, and he was soon allowed to go out for walks every day. At last his cast had been removed and a thin brace took its place to keep his wrist supported as he got used to using his right hand again. Solid foods became a regular part of his diet, and constant checkups told the doctors that his lungs were near the best shape they'd ever be in.

Even more good news was that, according to his siblings, Marik's health was rapidly increasing as well. He'd resumed physical therapy and once again found the will to take care of himself, now depending more on nutrition and good rest than medication to feel better; much to the delight of his family. This came as news that was equally good as it was bad for Ryou.

The better they both got, the closer they came to the point where they would need to address the thing he'd been pushing away all of this time. Their conversations continued every day, but the passing of the journal became less frequent as they kept exchanging small talk. Yugi and his group also had to refrain from visiting daily now, but they still came around to visit both Ryou and Marik in their own time.

And through it all, Ryou grew increasingly unsettled. Everything was waiting on him, and soon he'd run out of excuses to keep putting it off. The idea to have Marik blindfolded when they finally met again had been swimming around in his head. It might help with seeing Marik again, but he knew that wouldn't take care of everything. He still needed to know what to say. And the more he wondered about that, the more stressed he would become all over again.

And so, once again, Ryou paced along the floor of his yami's soul room with evident agitation. Bakura watched with little interest.

"I think you're lying to yourself."

Ryou looked up. "What?"

"I think you do want revenge, but you're afraid to admit it."

"No I don't," Ryou said, continuing his pacing.

"You do. Because I most certainly would. It's in our nature. You can't deny that."

Ryou gave him a hard look. "I can. And I do." That was a lie. And Bakura knew it just as much as Ryou did. The younger host added, "Even if it is in our nature, that doesn't mean I have to give in to it. It's general human nature for anyone to want an eye for an eye. But I really think that it will just make me feel worse in the end."

He could feel that Bakura was holding back a snarky remark. Commendable for the thief, but digressive from the point at hand.

"No." Ryou continued. "I don't want payback. That will just make his condition worse, and then I'll feel guilty."

"Well you want something," Bakura said. "Something he's yet to give you."

"It isn't vengeance. He's suffered enough."

"Do you really think so?"

No answer.

"If he's suffered enough, then you should be able to face him. Yet you're still afraid. Even though I've told you time after time that his evil side is gone forever."

"That's what everyone thought before."

"I told you this is different. I made sure that he can't come back. There's nothing left of him that can come back."

Ryou gave an aggravated huff and began to pace more fervently. "Even so, weren't you listening when I was on the phone earlier?"

"Barely," Bakura admitted, inspecting his nails.

"I'm afraid of flying into a fit in front of him and breaking him beyond repair."

"How very selfless."

There was a hint of something in his tone that made Ryou glare at him again.

"You're resorting to what they call 'denial' again," Bakura said. "Or whatever that other one is - where you use someone else as an excuse to avoid your own accountability."

Ryou spun on his heel to face him. "And I dare say it's the first time in my life I've ever done so!"

"Ha!" Bakura was completely unmoved.

"I don't even get credit for all the times I put others before myself. If ever there was a time I truly deserved -"

"Oh, just shut it," Bakura got to his feet, looking disgusted now. "When we first arrived here, you weren't so weak. You didn't make endless excuses… And you didn't fear his name. You didn't even panic when we saw him come into your room."

"I wasn't comfortable with that either."

"But you managed it well enough."

"I was numb. I'd given up, nothing mattered anymore. Now it does," Ryou argued.

"And that's turned you into a coward? When he came to you, you heard everything he had to say. Now he can't even say hello without your blood running cold."

"I was in the real world, not hiding in a soul room. I was vulnerable."

Bakura scoffed. "You've never been this pathetic before. You've encountered danger numerous times and you've pulled through."

"No, that was you!" Ryou insisted. "You're the one who pulled through, and you know bloody well that nothing this bad has ever happened to me before!"

"And it won't again! Which means there's nothing at all for you to fear anymore!"

Ryou threw his hands up in aggravation and turned away.

"Why do you think I have no fear of him?" Bakura asked. "Because I've already felt the worst fear that I possibly could. He could never surpass that. You need to allow yourself to realize the same is true for you now."

"That's not fair," Ryou spun around again. "The source of your greatest fear is far behind you, it's not waiting down the hall for you to face it!"

"And if you don't face it, you'll never leave it behind you."

Ryou gritted his teeth and tightened his hands into fists. Silence spread between them, and Ryou knew his Yami was absolutely right. Everyone was. He was the only one preventing it all from happening. Bakura waited; keeping his eyes on his host, and knowing full well how his thoughts were trying to persuade him to make a move already.

Finally, he suggested, "He's used the millennium Rod to converse with me across a distance. Shall we try that?"

"No," Ryou instantly shook his head. "This is the one place he can't touch me. I don't want him here."

"Well if you won't see him in person, you haven't got much of a choice, have you?" Bakura grumbled. "Whether or not you forgive him is up to you, but you will face him. I'm not going to spend our days tiptoeing around this city to avoid him. And certainly not when the time comes to return to Egypt. You will face this fear and you will conquer it. What you do afterward matters little to me."

Then, with a sudden wave of the thief's hand, the soul room's floor began to shift and warp. A mass rose up from it, twisting and rolling until it resembled a kneeling human. A blonde human.

Ryou's eyes widened and he took several steps back, "Bakuraaa -"

The form completed itself until Marik sat his knees, blindfolded with his wrists chained to the floor.

"Don't do this. Please!" Ryou begged.

Bakura moved toward the new apparition and gave a single, very loud clap of his hands.

Something dark sprung up from the floor all around the blonde, and he was suddenly surrounded by a square of black iron bars. Bakura looked at Ryou.

"The monster is gone. All that remains of Marik is a frightened child being eaten alive by his own guilt. Does that sound like something to fear?"

Ryou looked at his Yami, short of breath and silently begging for him to take this image away. Bakura did not. Nor did he waver an inch. He looked hard back at his reincarnation, urging him to do what he must.

Realizing he would never win the staring contest, Ryou reluctantly looked at the new addition – and stared. Simply stared at it. It certainly looked like the real deal. It was hard to believe the real Marik hadn't just been transported into their soul room. It moved yes, ever so slightly, but it made no fuss at being held in blind captivity with them speaking over it.

No, Ryou admitted to himself. This was simply an illusion. Nothing more. He stared for a long time at the fake Marik, trying to force his feet to move himself closer. Bars and a chain? And Bakura only a few feet away in their own environment? Surely Ryou was one hundred percent safe. Right? His hand reached out to a nearby ornament box, withdrawing a long blade. Bakura's eyes move quickly to it, then back to his host. He showed no emotion toward the movement at all except determination, and curiosity.

Ryou came closer to the cage. The apparition was so lifelike. It sat mostly still but moved slightly this way and that, as though listening to its surroundings. Ryou could even hear the faint sound of its breath through its nose as he approached the bars. Ryou's mind was racing in every direction, wondering how he was meant to use this illusion to help himself. He knew he was meant to treat it as the real thing, which required no effort on his part at all, but to what end?

Closing his hand tightly around the knife handle, Ryou quickly struck the blade against the iron bars. The image of Marik jumped at the sudden 'clang', tensing itself but otherwise unresponsive. Ryou stared, wide-eyed, and swallowed hard. He brought the blade more carefully against the bars again, causing a much softer clang. He moved the knife across, letting it hit each bar in turn – the image did not react. Ryou did the same in the other direction, more forcefully. Marik hunched his shoulders up a little, but that was all.

Ryou stood up a little straighter, looking down on him. He took a few quiet steps to one side and paused. He smacked the blade hard against the iron once more, causing the image to jump again. Ryou brought the blade against a bar and tried to move it up along the metal. It did little good, and as he brought it back down, he decided the scraping sound was more annoying than anything. So he simply pressed the knife against the bar, and began to walk; bringing with him a series of clanks. The image moved its head slightly and hunched up its shoulders a little more.

Bakura watched with full, quiet attention as his host made his careful way all around the cage. It seemed the younger version of himself had realized this was not the real version of their associate, and so was now toying with it. Testing out what he could do – and therefore, what he wanted.

After Ryou had made a full clattering circle and a half in one direction, he stopped. He turned and made his way quietly in the other direction, staring intently at the false Egyptian. A quarter of the way around, he smacked the knife hard against the bars again, causing a more satisfying jump from the captive form. Ryou moved a bit further before continuing his clanging against the bars; much like a small child might drag a stick along a freshly painted picket fence in earlier days.

Ryou made another full circle before stopping again. He stood still, staring at the notably nervous form in the cage.

Several minutes passed, with nothing happening. Ryou's thoughts were squirming around in his mind, but nothing legible came to Bakura's attention. Eventually, Ryou turned ever so slightly to his Yami, and made a lowering gesture with his hand. Progress, the thief thought to himself. He clapped his hands again then held each one out, palm down, before bringing them downward. Obediently, the manifestation of the iron bars sank back into the onyx-colored floor. Now Ryou stood a mere few feet from a manifestation of his only friend, wielding a large knife while the other knelt – still helplessly bound to the floor and blind to all around him. Another minute or so creeped by with no movement from either.

Bakura's years of stealth training made him invisible, though he wasn't trying to hide. He simply made no move nor sound, and was quickly forgotten.

Eventually, Ryou came around in front of Marik, and knelt down to equal eye level. Well, almost equal. His closeness was not unnoticed either, as the blonde tensed a bit more and his breathing became more stressed. He certainly knew of Ryou's closeness. What marvelous things the Millennium Items could create.

How much time he spent like that, no one could say. But it felt like a long while. Ryou ran his hand over his mouth and chin. What did he want? What would it take? He glanced down at the large blade in his hand then back to the other. Edging forward, Ryou brought the knife up and let it hover in front of Marik's face. He used it to move a lock of hair away from the blindfold. The fake flinched a little.

Ryou frowned and turned his head to the side, keeping his eyes on it. "Are you making him react this way?"

"No," Bakura answered. "You are."

Ryou turned back toward his captive. So it was acting like this because he wanted it to? Ryou brought the knife around and let the flat side of the blade move against Marik's neck. The bound figure began to tremble now. Ryou turned the knife again and brought the tip up under the other's chin. Enough to prick, but not puncture. He heard a frightened hiss of breath from the blonde. Ryou considered this for a while, then brought the blade back down.

Bakura quickly became bored with this teasing, and went to go sit upon his throne. Taking a small box of treasure from his side table, he began to inspect and admire each piece, periodically looking up at his host.

Ryou spent an agonizingly long time staring and testing the mirage's reaction. But he remained focused through all of it, so Bakura made no objection.

Eventually he spoke. "Can you hear me?"

Another flinch, but no response.

"Can you hear me?" Ryou asked again, more sternly.

A shaky nod.

"What do you think is going to happen?"

It hunched up its shoulders. Ryou brought the knife up to its throat again.

"Answer me!"

Bakura raised his head. "It doesn't have a mind of its own, you know. It's just reacting the way you'd think it would, or would want it to -"

"I know that," Ryou snapped. He addressed Marik again. "So answer!"

"You w-want to kill me." It said.

"I don't," Ryou said. "So why are you here now? Like this?"

"You want to hurt me."

Ryou narrowed his eyes. That one he wasn't so sure about.

"What good would that do?"

"An eye for an eye." It said. Its voice didn't sound strong like Marik's usually did. But then, Ryou remembered the last time he'd heard the real Marik speak, he hadn't sounded strong either.

"It would let you off the hook, wouldn't it?" Ryou demanded, letting his bitterness pass into aggression. "You'd finally feel better about yourself while I'd feel like heartless scum!"

"I'm sorry," it said.

"You not!" Ryou pressed the blade a little harder against its neck. "You want me to hurt you so you can forgive yourself. Even though you know it won't fix anything. You just want to feel like we're even so you can move on."

"So do it," it whimpered.

"I wouldn't give you that satisfaction!" Ryou growled at it, openly scowling now. He brought his other hand up to tighten around Marik's neck, under the knife. He brought his own face close, staring through the fabric at the eyes he couldn't see. "Why should you be set free of your torment and not me? Huh?"

"I'm sorry," it said again.

"If you really want me to hurt you, then there's no better torture than to let you keep hating yourself and wallowing in your own sickness." His throat tightened and his voice cracked. "And I don't want that!"

Its chin quivered, matching his own anguish.

"I want both of us to get better, Marik! Not just you, not just me! Both of us! How can we do that if I cut you down? Tell me!"

"I'm sorry," it said.

"Stop saying that!" Ryou pressed the blade harder, almost enough to cut. "That's all you ever say!" He glared hard at the blonde. "That's all you can say, isn't it? That's all you're good for anymore, is empty apologies! You don't even know what y –"

His face suddenly fell, the growing hostility gone all at once. That was it!

You don't know…

Bakura perked up as this thought reached him. He watched intently.

A moment longer of staring at the quivering substitute, then Ryou got to his feet. His eyes glazed over as his thoughts began to piece things together. He turned aimlessly toward his Yami, holding a hand out as if to ask for no interruptions. Bakura said nothing. The look of epiphany now on his host's face was a long-awaited development.

Ryou's eyes moved quickly back and forth as a look of hope suddenly crossed his face.

"That's the answer," he murmured.

He raised his head to look at Bakura. The other cocked his head.

"He's innocent," Ryou said, as though that explained everything. It didn't. Not to Bakura at least.

Ryou brought up both hands as though presenting his point in person. "It doesn't matter how much guilt he feels because in the end, he'll still be innocent! His apologies can't change that."

Bakura quirked a brow and gave a slight squint of his eyes in question.

"All this time…" Ryou trailed off, looking at the floor again. He shook his head to himself. "I know what to do now."

He raised his head. "I want to see him!"

*groan* I'm so happy to have this chapter finally posted. I can't even tell you how much. It's been the biggest headache ever since the last chapter update.

And honestly, I'm still not pleased with how it turned out. But I really, really needed to be done with it.

The thing that was holding me back most was the conversation between Yugi and Ryou. My original idea for that scene began to sound more and more ... I don't know, unsatisfactory. And any other idea I had just sounded stupid so I cut the idea out completely and left it as you see here. So if it seems rushed or like they came to that agreement too soon, now you know why. Maybe one day my YGO muse will tell me how to come back and fix it but until that happens, I'm moving on to the end of this story. I'll see you there.