Disclaimer: I own nothing except the idea, Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto, if there are resemblances to other stories they will either be credited or it is unintentional.

Note: Sorry for the late update, I had vacation, when I got back I had to get stuff for school, than school itself, now I have bad allergies and my throat was all raw until recently.

There is a poll for this story.

To Shadow (Guest)-Naruto: Myoushuu no Fuuin- it's a good team seven fic, it hasn't been updated in a while, but to my knowledge is still active.

To - narutonarutonaru (Guest) – The Sannin are good, but they could have been better with the abilities they are known to have. Tsunade's strength could have a better style, Jaraiya could have learned sage without the toad if he didn't peep so much and Orochimaru would have been a better fighter if he wasn't so focused on immortality. You're right some others are also one trick, Sasori and Pain, although I disagree on Itachi, we've never seen him go all out without mangekyo which takes a shit load of chakra, meaning he could do less than he knows.

Does this look good? Tails 1 to 9 VVV

Bijuu/corruption/purity

Shukaku/Insanity/Calm

Matatabi/perversion/caring

Isobu/Laziness/Wisdom

Son Goku/carelessness/action

Kokuo/sacrifice/sacrifice

Saiken/arrogance/helping

Chomei/sadism/tolerance

Gyuki/hate/friendship

Kurama/Wrath/Love

Thanks for all the reviews sent and any ideas given.

Legend

"What is love"-speech

'Baby don't hurt me'-thought

"I hate bunnies"-bijuu/angry Jinchuuriki/summons

Rasengan - jutsu

[Translation]

(In story author note)

{Ino, Shino & the missing nin}

Shino decided to start this as loud as possible and pray Tenten and Lee caught on quick.

2 explosion note wrapped kunai seemed to just appear in his hands, he threw them, made a Mushi Bunshin no Jutsu [insect clone] to carry Ino, and jumped forward to present himself as more of a target than Ino.

Nin 1 jumped away from the kunai, causing them to explode behind him, Nin 2 started to go through hand signs for an earth jutsu. Shino stopped this by delivering a roundhouse kick to his torso.

Nin 1 grabbed Shino and threw him into a wall, never noticing some bugs had crept onto his arm, draining his chakra.

Nin 2 responded by kicking Shino harder, causing a small indent to appear on the wall behind him. Nin 1 went after Ino and clone, but he couldn't catch him, the bunshin was made of bugs, thus could move easier than a normal human. Anything thrown at him was dodged enough for Ino's safety and the bunshin would reform.

Shino was yanked up and a kunai was being shoved at his throat when Lee got there.

"DYNAMIC ENTRY!"

Shino's life was saved, although it should be noted that if hadn't distracted the Nin Ino would have died, but he would have soundly defeated them both without a scratch, making it all her fault.

Lee accidently put too much strength in his blow and Nin 2's head exploded with the impact, causing Lee to freeze. Nin 1 flung around and threw a kunai at Lee, but Tenten hit the kunai in mid-air with pinpoint accuracy … and an axe.

Clone Shino dropped Ino and jumped forward and dispelled himself into thousands of Kikaichu [Parasitic Destruction Insects] and sucked the man's chakra until he died, the inherent chakra in the air crushing his pathways once they emptied out too much, stopping his heart from beating.

(This is how chakra exhaustion works here, everything, even civilians and animals have enough chakra to keep the natural chakra from crushing them and stopping their hearts.)

Tenten smacked Lee and screamed "Focus Lee, he's dead, but our comrade is alive, help him!"

This seemed to get Lee out of his depression, for the moment, and picked up the exhausted and heavily beaten Shino, while Tenten got Ino, who was still unconscious, but she'd regain consciousness soon.

They would go to the meeting place and keep the 2 stable until the sensei's arrived. For some reason they all had a sense of foreboding about camp.

{Shikamaru & Hinata}

The plan was set, now as long as everything played out, all would be well. Shikamaru smirked, he loved strategy games like shoji and go, but real life was so much better.

Hinata was in position, waiting for his signal, he was just getting comfortable.

3…2…1…go.

Hinata jumped across the roofs and dropped a half a dozen tags, unlit. Shikamaru hit the girl with his kagemane no jutsu [shadow imitation] and jumped forward, the girl following his movements, and with strength she didn't normally have jumped away.

Hinata dropped alit match, which Shikamaru had pickpocketed off some random smoker. The moment the match made contact they exploded, killing the thugs and Hinata froze.

Shikamaru in response let the girl go and pointed her to the street, where she ran, presumably home. He used the kagemane no jutsu again, on Hinata and started walking away. Hinata didn't even notice as her body moved on its own.

Shikamaru sighed "Troublesome, let's go Hinata, we'll go back to the meeting and wait for everyone, I'll make you something to eat, and maybe that'll help calm you down."

Hinata didn't respond, Shikamaru didn't expect her too, but talking helped him. He wished he'd lit the tags, but knew this would be good for her; she wanted to be a kunoichi? Well this would either make her one or break her of a foolish dream.

Somehow he knew getting to camp wasn't going to help matters.

{Shizune}

Shizune almost screamed.

Ninja or not, a blonde haired, red eyed, fang showing teen smiling at you, and having appeared from nowhere tended to have that effect.

Naruto for his part was enjoying himself, he knew this was going to be fun, he wondered if she blushed? Totally off topic but Naruto didn't care, as a medic Shizune was all precision, and he had an advanced healing factor, he'd win.

Kurama wasn't helping, he was talking to Sakura about something she'd just read, who knew the Kyuubi was a pervert? Granted he was probably doing it more because it annoyed Sasuke and Naruto rather than actually being a pervert himself, but he knew WAY too much on the topic to be totally innocent.

Anko was grinning to the side, she wanted to get involved but Naruto had told her no, which would have done nothing, if it wasn't for the fact he had hit her with a bunch of demon chakra infused KI and said it in a deep in-human voice, staring sightlessly with red eyes. So she stood to the side, but the grin the eldest Tasatsu sported told her this would be good.

Naruto decided that he could turn this into some big confrontation, but he decided not to, he wasn't sure he could have a big fight and not drain the cute girl dry. "So, you're coming back to Konoha with me and my team, sensei is getting you're Sannin. Will you come in one piece or do I break you first?"

Shizune tried to glare and opened her mouth to tell him off when Naruto interrupted her. "You're cute, and I can think of many things we can do with your mouth open like that, but can this wait until we get back home?"

Shizune's mouth clamped shut; she blushed redder than an apple, and tried to stutter out something. When that failed she decided to answer with her actions since she couldn't with her words.

She raised her right arm, moved the sleeve back and launched several poisoned sebon at Naruto, who just grinned and let them hit.

Her eyes widened, she had expected him to move, Anko's eyes widened too, their eyes only continued to widen when Naruto chuckled and glowed red. The needle like weapons falling out of his body and the holes disappearing in an instant.

Naruto's chuckle turned into a laugh "I'm a Jinchuuriki; you think this'll hurt me? Well that answered that, don't worry, I'll leave you healthy enough to heal … eventually. I might want a date after all." Naruto had a cocky smile while Shizune had an odd mix of an angry glare and embarrassed blushing.

Naruto dashed forward.

"One Blow!" His right hand hit her stomach.

"Two Blow!" His left hand hit her upper right chest.

"Three Blow!" His left foot kicked her chin, lifting her up.

"Four Blow!" His right hand knocked her left shoulder out of the way.

"Five Blow!" His left hand hit her right shoulder out of the way.

"Six Blow!" His right foot hit her right foot out.

"Seven Blow!" His left foot hit her left foot, so she was spread eagle in midair.

"Eight Blow!" He covered himself in chakra and it pulled her back down to the ground and pulled her forward.

"Nine Blows of the Kitsune!" He charged forward and hit her with his chakra covered shoulder slamming into her torso.

He broke 4 of her ribs in 6 different places, bruised her whole torso, and sent her crashing into the wall behind her. The wall now had a 12 foot diameter, 4 inch deep, crater with Shizune's body in the middle.

Anko just stood there with her mouth open. Her opinion of the blond, already extremely high, went higher still.

Naruto just grunted, looked at Anko and said, "Mission done, do you think she'd go out on a date with me when she's better?" Anko just said "Maybe." After all some girls were into that kind of thing. (*Cough* Haku *Cough*)

He nodded and walked over to the broken girl, lifted her, covered in Kurama's chakra to make the pain go away, and carrying her bridal style, walked away.

"Come on, let's go to camp, otouto might be there." That got Anko to agree quickly enough. With that the 3 went to camp, 1 still out cold, and if it wasn't for Kurama, would be in immense pain.

…

"Hey Anko?" "Yeah Blondie?" "Do you have a feeling camp will be fun tonight?" "You know what? Yeah I do."

{Hidan}

Hidan was known as "Fukyu Hidan" [Fukyu-immortal/everlasting] he was an S-rank ninja and one of the strongest people in the world. Strong and unafraid of anything, few could match him. Basically immortal, quick healing and with no real pain perception, made many fights a breeze. Of course he was also smart, although most didn't know it, he preferred brawling.

Walking into a random town as an S-rank missing nin wasn't smart, but it might be fun. Unknown to him his life would change, and for the better, with this little excursion.

As he walked into town, he wore his usual robe, black with silver trim, the silver Kanji for blood on his back, robes open in the front, hair slicked back and huge, triple bladed scythe on his back.

As he walked down he met a strange sight, a raven haired guy with red and blond highlights was watching a red haired girl with blond and black highlights eat someone. Well he assumed she was eating him, she had her jaw closed around his neck. Although she did drop him, and didn't bite him again, the guy was dead, and he looked wrinkly, like he was dehydrated.

The raven haired kid said "That's why you don't try to feel up Aneki. Although that was a little extreme, and you didn't let me have any."

The red head replied "Where there one pervert there's always more, you can drain the next one."

"OK."

Hidan decided to talk to the 2, they seemed interesting, and he had to do it in his own way of course. "Yo fuck-tards nice show, when's the next showing?"

Neither Tasatsu reacted, Sasuke answered though "Names Tasatsu Sasuke and this is my Aneki Sakura, the next show is the next person to tick us off. " The 2 were contacted by Kurama at this point.

"That's Hidan, Fukyu Hidan, a Jashinist. Jashin is a relatively minor god of bloodshed; his priests can gain a pseudo-immortality by killing a hundred people. This gets them a 'Blood bank' every day they live, time they die, or heal a bit of that blood drains off. Once it's all gone they pass on. However each subsequent kill adds to the 'bank' the only reliable way to kill one is to incinerate him or her, wait for them to use a ton of blood to be re-made, and repeat. This one swears a lot, is an S-rank Shinobi, and loves fighting."

Sakura smiled and seemed to disappear, a moment later Hidan got glomped "I can't believe you killed a hundred people or more at once! I'd love to do that! It would taste so good!" Sasuke sweat dropped and Hidan went wide eyed. What. The. Fuck. He just got a new fan.

Sasuke tilted his head to the side and said "Come on, were going back to camp, and yes you can bring Hidan along, maybe he'll come back to Konoha with us and teach you some scythe moves."

Sakura nodded happily and Hidan screamed "Wait! Don't I get a m*****fuckin' say in all this?"

Sakura answered "Nope! Were Tasatsu, we get whatever we want. Come on Hidan-ojii." [Ojii-san someone over 60] (I assume he's not like 20, he's immortal and relatively well known, and so I'm going to say he's about 68) And dragged him off, Sasuke walked behind them just shaking his head. Only one of his family would walk up to an S-rank and drag them off like there new puppy. He didn't know why but he felt getting back to camp would be interesting.

Hidan's life had just changed for the better, and all he had to say was "YOU FUCKING GAKI! I'M GOING TO FUCKING SACRAFICE YOU TO JASHIN-SAMA!"

{Haku}

Haku was off to the side, she was happy they met Tsunade; she had full faith that Kakashi could beat her, but Haku remained unsure any of the others could. Maybe all 3 Tasatsu could, but they might get over excited and rip off the Sannin's head and drain her dry.

When Kakashi pulled out the Kubikiribocho, than added some sort of super mode, Haku got excited. This would be fun to watch.

{Tsunade and Kakashi}

Kakashi loved his new sword. It just had so many cool abilities, he had learned most of them in his spars with Guy, but this was the first time truly using it. Unfortunately he couldn't kill the opponent, it being Tsunade, but still let's see what this blade got.

Any cracks or breaks could be healed with blood, something he was around often considering he was often with Tasatsu.

Katon chakra wreathed the handle in fire so no else could take the blade from him, and punching with his sword arm did some nice damage.

Futon chakra sharpened the edge to a ridiculous degree.

Suiton chakra laced the spine, which could shoot out to make a whip for even more range off the stupidly big sword.

Doton chakra put HIGHLY compressed dirt into the holes, by taking a cubic millimeter and expanding it to pebble size it was still denser than most metals and would shoot off faster than a kunai.

Raiton chakra imbued into the rest of the blade meant even if he blocked it still had the potential to hurt or partially paralyze the one hitting at him.

The blade kicked so much ass, that the level of ass kicking was kicked to a level only the likes of Madara or Hashirama could normally kick. (That took you a minute to figure out, didn't it?)

Moving on he had jumped at Tsunade at relatively high speeds, not top speeds, he didn't want to actually behead her. Well he kinda did but the mission parameters said she had to be alive.

She jumped out of the way when Kakashi had the water extend, cutting Tsunade across the cheek.

"First blood to me." Taunted Kakashi.

Tsunade got pissed that someone she still saw as a child had just cut her. Completely forgetting her earlier fear she rushed forwards to punch Kakashi's head off. He countered by jumping over her, but sticking his sword downwards. Tsunade missed Kakashi completely, but hit his sword, electrocuting her. Kakashi Used the spin he got from her punch and extended his arm out more, allowing his flame covered had to hit her other cheek and sending her a good 8 feet away.

"First blood, second blow, and first dodge all to me. My Tsu-hime, I think you've lost your touch." Taunted Kakashi in a childish voice. Tsunade blindly retaliated, but thanks to his Sharingan she never even got close. He lashed out and when his sword was a good inch away she jumped away, unfortunately for her the futon chakra on the blade still got her, giving her another mark on the upper left part of her chest.

He ran forward to continue the chain. He swung his sword, and Tsunade tried to knock it away, but Kakashi tilted his sword and stopped the momentum. The sword was only a few inches away and Tsunade was still slightly shocked by touching the sword. Over 3 dozen pebble sized dirt chunks shot out of the sword, and Tsunade was to slow to dodge them. She was to slow and got halve a dozen scratches, one pebble hit her left arm and blew a chunk the size of a baseball on her upper arm, exposing the bone.

Tsunade had no choice but to activate the Sozo Saisei [Creation Rebirth] to heal her left arm. Kakashi had to admit it was a cool technique, although he couldn't admit to being overly impressed, his 3 students could heal the same with no real draw back, even if it was because they were connected to an overly sarcastic kitsune.

He used the water whip to basically smack her across the face for added insult. "Is that all? If this is it this shouldn't take much longer." Tsunade saw red.

As she charged forwards again she never saw Kakashi smirk, although his mask might have helped.

Unknown to her all his moves had been for a reason. He had started at point A, hit her at point B, and dodged to point C. Now she charged right into the middle of these three points where 3 pebbles lie. Each pebble was from his sword, saturated with his chakra, when she charged he shouted "Fuuin!" And he manipulated the chakra around each pebble.

The chakra around each one cut seal marks and then created a sealing cage. A giant pyramid appeared around her; he extended a hand and used a sealing jutsu he learned from Kushina, knocking the Sannin out.

Haku was stunned; she thought that half the village would be destroyed by the battle. That's it?

Kakashi noted and said, while shyly rubbing the back of his head with his not-carrying-a-huge-ass-sword hand, "Disappointing huh? I figured this would be easier."

Haku dumbly nodded. Kakashi stopped the cage, and slung Tsunade over one shoulder, covering his Sharingan eye and sealing his sword.

He looked at Haku "Camp is going to be a mess, I can feel it. I don't know how I know, but I know I'm going to have to yell at all of the Tasatsu, at least 2 non-Tasatsu, comfort another, and get pissed at still another. Let's get back and get this started." Haku dumbly nodded.

That's it, sorry for the delay, but I'm alive. I hope you all enjoy, and Hidan's here. Tell me that isn't fun, another psychotic sadist on top of Tasatsu, Anko, and Kurama. Let's hope this continues.