Chapter 11: Dinner
B POV
All day Saturday I turned Friday's events over and over in my head, excusing away Edward's actions. He joined the fight to save Jacob, his friend, from getting hurt. He was opening doors because it was the polite thing to do. He kissed me on the hand to make Tanya jealous. These thoughts ran through my head over and over again.
I was thinking them as I did my homework, went to the store, did laundry, cooked. Pretty soon Charlie noticed something was off too. I hadn't told him about the attempted mugging because I didn't want to upset him. If I told him about it he'd never let me go to another football game again. I promised myself if I felt any more of a threat from James, Victoria or Laurent I'd tell him straightaway though.
"Okay Bells." Charlie breaks the silence as we eat dinner. "What is it?"
"Nothing," I wave my fork at him as I take another bite of the chicken alfredo I made.
"No it's not." Charlie sets his arm down on the table. "You're upset." Was he reading me that well for once? "You're upset about dinner with your grandfather tomorrow night aren't you?" I guess he wasn't reading me that well.
"Yeah," I grumble wanting him to think that is the reason I'm upset rather than over some guy I barely know.
"Well, you don't need to worry about that. I already told Grandpa Charles to be on his best behavior." He takes another bite of garlic bread.
"Good," Like that would stop him from saying whatever the hell came to his mind.
Dinner continued in relative silence. I found reading hard to do that night as I sat in bed. I would start reading, then thinking and before I knew it I was halfway down the page and realized I didn't pay attention to anything I had just read because my mind was too far gone. I gave up and went to sleep.
Billy stopped by Sunday morning and picked Charlie up for fishing so I had the house to myself until noon. Charlie was due to be back by then so that we could head up to Port Angeles to see Grandpa Charles.
I'm in the kitchen eating pancakes when the phone rings.
"Hello?" I answer.
"Hey Bells! It's Jake."
"Hey Jake. What's up?"
"Nothing," he says nonchalantly. "Just calling to make sure you're doing okay."
"Yeah I'm doing great." I put the phone between my shoulder and my ear so I can clean my dish.
"Good good." He answers. "Listen, Leah is going to be by soon. I told her I would take her to dinner and a movie. Something about not going out enough. I dunno, girls."
"I am a girl Jake," I remind him.
"Yeah but you don't count. You're...you."
"Thanks? I think," I answer. I knew what he meant. I was platonic and neutral. No need to try and figure me out because I wasn't in that league.
"So?" I muse. "You called me to tell me that you're going out with your girlfriend?"
"Ah, no. I called to see if you and Edward wanted to double tonight. That way I don't have to listen to Leah talk about girl stuff the entire time. You can do that stuff for me and then Edward and I can talk about guy stuff."
"Whoa! Edward and I aren't dating." I stammer. "And I have to go to dinner at my grandpa's anyway tonight. Sorry, I can't be your girlfriend's babysitter for the night."
"Oh," Jacob hesitates. "AWKward! I just figured the way he acted around you the other night and how you were going to his party that maybe you guys were..." He trails off.
"Well, no." I clarify. "We are only biology partners."
"OH! I get it," he nearly shouts. "Like benefriends."
"WHAT?" I yell, "NO!" I pull the phone away from my ear and press the TALK button to end the call.
Are you kidding me? Now Jacob is asking about Edward and I? What is wrong with everyone? Why would Jacob think Edward is interested in me? He has Tanya practically throwing herself at him! The phone rings again.
"No Jacob! That is NOT what is going on between Edward and I AT ALL you perv!"
"Bella?" Edward's voice asks. I drop the phone like it's a hot iron. It lands right in the sink. I grab for it and press TALK to disconnect.
Panic sets in as I realize what I just screamed at Edward over the phone. Holy shit! Holy shit! HOLY SHIT! What is Edward going to think? He is probably going to think I'm crazy. The phone rings again startling me. I collect myself and press TALK.
"Umm, hello?" I answer quietly and calmly this time.
"Hello? Bella?" Edward asks again.
"Yeah?"
"This is Edward." He clarifies.
"I know." I breathe as mortification sets in.
"Okay, good." He pauses making sure I don't hang up again on him I suppose. "You still there?"
"Yes." I answer him.
"Okay good," He repeats himself. "Well, from what you screamed earlier I can tell you already talked to Jacob." I shove my head into my free hand and wallow in self-pity as I listen to him continue.
"Anyway," He clears his throat. "He called me a little before he called you I guess." Uh-oh. Did he proposition Edward with the same thing he propositioned me with? "He wanted to know if you and I would be available to go to dinner and a movie with him and Leah, his girlfriend."
Oh God! I think I'm going to pass out right now. I open the cupboard and snatch out a paper bag. I put it up to my mouth and take two deep breaths.
"Bella? You there?" He asks again.
"Yep." I squeak.
"Ok then," he pauses as I take another couple of deep breaths. "What do you say? Are you free? I mean it won't be until a little later. I can come pick you up around four?"
"I can't!" I blurt.
"Oh," his voice drops.
"I'm sorry. I really can't." I lower my decibel level. "My punishment for the whole food fight thing is having dinner tonight with my dad's dad."
"Huh," he grunts. "Sounds easy compared to what I got. I have to do all the laundry in the house for a month because of the whole shirt thing. Not to mention I also have to do all the dishes after meals for a month too. But I guess you weren't that guilty of a party." I continue to breathe using my paper bag while he says this. "So?" He continues. "Would you be up for a rain check?"
My breath catches. "Umm," I falter. "Yeah I guess." Did he just ask me out? Did I just agree?
"Great! Then I guess I'll talk to you later." He brightens up.
"Uh-huh. Bye." I manage to choke out.
I crush the bag to my lips trying to stop myself from hyperventilating. I try to think, but the only thing running through my head is 'ohshitohshitOHSHIT!'
The phone rings again! GOD DAMMIT PEOPLE STOP CALLING ME!
"Hello!" I forcefully answer.
"Bells?" It's Charlie this time.
"You okay?" He asks.
"Yes." I hiss through my teeth as I manage to stand up and walk into the living room.
"Umm," Charlie pauses. "Just calling to find out if you were awake and to let you know that I'm headed home early because the fish aren't biting."
"Okay," I grit.
"Bye." He answers quickly probably fearing for his life.
At least Charlie's call allowed me to calm down. He's coming home and I can't let him see me like this. I throw the paper bag away and stomp up the stairs phone in hand. I walk into the bathroom and slam the water on full blast.
The phone rings. WTH? REALLY, REALLY?
"Hello!" I practically shout.
"Bella?" It's Rose.
"Yeah Rose?" I answer with more than an hint of annoyance in my voice.
"Maybe's not the time?" She asks.
"No." I breathe, letting the anger and frustration roll off of me. "Sorry." I sigh. "Rough morning."
"Okay," Rose brightens. "Well. First of all, let me apologize beforehand."
"About what?" This piques my interest.
"Umm. Well." Rose hesitates. This must be bad. "Well, you know I'd never tell anyone what you told me on purpose." Uh-oh.
"ROSE!" I shout.
"I didn't! It's just, it's really, really hard to keep something from Alice!" She cries. Oh. "And she saw that something was up with you and I. So did Edward, which is where I got your number. I stole his phone and got it out by the way, hope you don't mind."
"No big," I calm her.
"Anyway," Rose gets back to the point. "Alice saw something was up and asked me about it yesterday when we were shopping. I didn't tell her anything but I think you should because I'm going to end up spilling something with the way she catches me off guard. Not to mention she can tell when I'm lying so she's on me even more now."
"Rose," I get her attention before all the hot water runs out. "I give you permission to let Alice know. She would've ended dragging it out of me anyway."
"Oh gosh thank you!" Rose sighs with relief. "I didn't want you to be upset with me."
"Umm, Rose." I stop her. "About telling Edward."
"Oh" Rose scoffs. "Don't even worry about that. I told him that you and I had a nice talk at the football game and that you had admitted to me that you felt kind of out of place. So I told him I just felt for you and that I am taking you under my wing. To prove it I told him Alice and I agreed to take you shopping some time."
"Oh." I have to sit down. "Okaaay?"
"So when do you want to go?" Rose asks.
"Umm, I don't know. I'll let you know when I have a free weekend."
"Okay! Sounds good! See ya tomorrow at school Bella!"
"Yeah." I say as I hang up the phone and stand up. The steam has filled the room. I strip and step into the shower, letting the hot water relax me.
By 3 o'clock I'm dressed in my Sunday best, no pun intended. I'm wearing my black slacks, red flowy blouse and a black shoulder jacket. I've left my hair long and am wearing a red headband.
"Ready to go?" Charlie calls as he comes down the stairs.
"Yep," I answer as he reaches the landing.
"You look nice." He compliments me.
"Thanks." I blush. "Let's go." I grab my keys. I insisted on driving because I refuse to drive in Charlie's police cruiser.
We hop in and drive the distance to Port Angeles in relative silence, listening to music. Charlie spent most of the time trying to get the ancient piece of junk to accept an audio cassette he had brought along with us. He succeeds getting it in but the system refuses to play anything. He ejects the tape but it doesn't come out.
"We need to get you a new stereo for your car Bella." He grits as he tries to pry the tape from the tape deck.
"Well now we will that you just crammed a tape down it's throat. Don't blame it for not liking your bad taste in music." As if in response to my comment, black film starts pouring out of the mouth of the cassette player.
"Shit," Charlie glances up at me with a guilty look on his face.
"I'm not ten anymore Charlie." I roll my eyes. "I know what that word is."
"Fine." He focuses back on the tape deck as he tries to pull it back out. He apparently gives up because he punches the thing with the side of his fist. "We'll get you a new one this week Bells. Sorry about that."
"It's okay." I shrug. "We're here anyway."
I pull into the driveway of a small brick home. The lawn is immaculate. The grass is cut, the flowerbeds have no weeds, the bushes are trimmed and the sidewalks have no dirt on them.
I exit the truck and wait for Charlie to come around the truck. We walk up to the door together and he knocks. No answer. Dad opens the door and shouts out. No answer.
The front room matches the front yard. No dust, pillows in place, pictures in order and freshly vacuumed.
"Dad!" Charlie calls out again.
"No need to yell! I'm right here." A gruff voice comes from around the corner. A body soon follows. He's taller than Charlie, with a fuller mustaches and way less hair. He's wearing a flannel shirt and suspenders that hold up his jeans.
"Oh. Hey dad." Charlie greets him. "We brought dessert." Charlie holds up the pie I made before we left; caramel apple, Grandpa Charles' favorite.
"Well good." Grandpa shakes Charlie's hand.
"Hi Grandpa." I wave.
"Come over here and give your grandpa a hug."
"I have to use your restroom dad. I'll drop this off in the kitchen on the way. Be right back." Charlie excuses himself to the bathroom.
"Hey." Grandpa beckons me over with his finger. I take a step closer. He pokes me in the stomach. "What's this?" he asks.
"Umm, my stomach?" I guess.
"Wrong, it's a jiggly bowl of Jell-O. When you gonna lose that?"
I look at him with a face of horror, then catch myself and try to laugh it off. I feel a blush spread over myself. Did he really just say that to me? This is going to be a long day.
"Yeah," I stammer.
"Good. First impressions are important and you don't want people to think you're lazy." I cringe. Of course he would say that, look at his house.
"Anyway. Come on in, make yourself at home." He waves me into the kitchen.
Charlie comes out a moment later. I give him a look of desperation mixed with betrayal. He looks at me puzzlingly.
"So how ya been dad?" he asks as he continues giving me this stupid look. I roll my eyes and look away.
Grandpa continues to complain, about everything. The wind blowing too hard, the rain overwatering his yard, the squirrels knocking pine cones out of the tree, the neighbors having too many barbecues in their backyard, just an endless supply of complaints.
"But enough about me." He finally concludes. "How have you been Bella? I haven't seen you since you were, smaller." He insinuates my weight rather then my age, but only I catch it.
"I've been good." I respond coolly. "School is good. I'm making friends. Looking for a job, not many to be had."
"Yeah," he agrees. "That's another thing that's been terrible. The economy and employment around here. I swear every time I step outside this house I see another homeless man asking for a handout."
"So where you been applying to?" He asks, apparently forgetting his rant about people who haven't had a good life. "And what do you want to do with your life?"
"Umm," I begin, "I've applied to a couple places. Some retail stores and daycares." I offer.
"Hmm, well could your weight have anything to do with not being hired?" He asks very seriously. Dad chokes on his drink as he takes a sip.
"Dad!" he interjects as he wipes the beer off his chin and chest. "What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well," Grandpa defends, "Some people don't want people working for their companies that look a certain way. They have certain images they want to put out to their customers."
"I don't think child care centers and book stores have weight limits for their employees. And if you are going to talk like that then I'm going to take Bella home. She doesn't need that kind of bullshit from you."
"Well excuse me," Grandpa huffs. "Didn't know it was such a touchy subject." I blush and look away.
"Yeah well," Dad says as he takes another sip of beer. "Enough."
With that the oven bell rings notifying us that dinner is ready. Grandpa bends over and pulls a roast out of the oven, surrounded in potatoes, carrots, onions and celery. It smells amazing and looks delicious. He sets it on the stovetop and pulls out a carving knife and serving fork. He cuts into it and it immediately falls apart.
"It's done." Grandpa announces. He finishes cutting it up and putting it on a serving platter. He carries it over to the table where Charlie and I sit. He sets it down and takes a seat at the head of the table. "Let's say grace."
He bows his head, Charlie and I exchange a pointed glance and then both bow our heads.
"Dear Lord, thank you for the wonderful meal we have in front of us. Thank you for the clothes on our backs and the shoes on our feet. Lord if you could watch over us and make sure our lives are happy and full we would be grateful. Personally I wouldn't mind if you took care of a couple of those squirrels out back, or at least forgive me for taking a BB gun to them this afternoon. Bless my son and granddaughter on their trip home when they leave. Amen."
"Amen." Charlie and I whisper in unison.
"Dig in." Grandpa gestures to the food in front of us. Charlie reaches for the serving fork. He serves himself up some meat and potatoes then slathers it in gravy. I grab a roll and begin buttering it. Grandpa grabs a little of everything and salts it.
"So you never answered my question before." Grandpa states before he takes a bite of celery. I spear a piece of meat onto my plate.
"What question?" I ask.
"What do you want to do with your life?" He asks pointing his fork at me.
"Well," I begin as I spoon some vegetables on my plate.
"I was thinking of going to either WSU or UW." I offer.
"Okay." He nods. "And what are you going to major in?"
"It gets a little fuzzy after that." I shrug as I put gravy on my food.
"Well aren't you planning for your future?" Grandpa asks. I take a bite of roast, chew and swallow before I answer.
"I guess I've been saving money and stuff like that. Great roast by the way." I add as I take another bite.
"Well, that's being financially responsible. But what about retirement?" He pushes.
"Maybe I'll marry well?" I shrug and chuckle.
"Huh. You'll have to get him drunk first." He fires back. Charlie chokes on a piece of meat momentarily, takes a drink and slams his beer down.
"That's it dad!" Charlie shouts. "Enough with your questions. Bella didn't come here so you could make her feel bad and tear her down. Bella as soon as you're done with your meal we're leaving."
I contemplate pushing my plate away and walking out now, but we came all this way and I don't want to make a scene. I shake my head and take another small bite of vegetables.
"Dad. I mean it, one more negative comment and we're gone." Charlie points his finger at grandpa. Grandpa just puts another piece of meat in his mouth and changes the subject. I finish eating but with less enthusiasm for it. I leave half of it on my plate and then ask to be excused.
I walk to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. The tears fall down my face. Even my own grandfather doesn't accept me for the way I look, how can I expect anyone else to? I splash some cold water on my face so that my crying isn't as noticeable and wipe my face.
I walk out of the bathroom to hushed and angry tones coming from the living room.
"I mean it dad." Charlie hisses. "She has enough problems without you making her feel worse about her body image. I'm not going to sit here and let you pick on, intimidate and belittle her like you did me. She's too good for that. She's too good for you."
I clear my throat as I come around the corner.
"Hey there sweetie. I just remembered I told Billy we were gonna watch some football tonight." He grins half-heartedly. "We better head back before he gets there." I nod. Charlie grabs the keys and holds the door open to me.
"Bye grandpa." I turn to wave to him before walking out the door.
"Goodbye Isabella." He waves back.
The drive home is filled with silence. I mull over the feelings of insecurity and just plain smallness I feel. Well, not smallness, I guess largeness. My heart hurts.
"I'm really sorry Bella." Charlie reaches out to grab my hand. "I didn't know he was going to be like that."
"It's fine." I shake my head.
"No, it's not." He argues. "You're a seventeen year old girl. You shouldn't have to hear shit like that, especially from your own grandfather. It's not right. I promise I won't subject you to that kind of thing again." A single tear traces a line down my cheek. Charlie pulls me to him as he drives. I lean into his side as he kisses me on the top of the head.
How Charlie escaped my grandfather's home with his kindness, love and charity still intact, I will never understand. I do know that he is a much better father to me then his own father was to him. I cuddle deeper into his side as he drives us back to our home.