Chapter 12: Secret

E POV

I hang up the phone and sigh, like a girl. Well, she didn't say no, but she didn't make it easy either. What was all this nonsense? I pick the phone back up, I have to know what Jacob said to her to freak her out.

I dial Jake's number, he picks up on the second ring.

"Hullo?"

"Hey Jake, me again."

"Sorry man." Jake apologizes. "I tried, she didn't bite. You're going to have to try another approach."

"Maybe not." I muse.

"What? But she said no. She's not up for going on a double." Jake argues.

"No, she just said not tonight." I correct. "When I called her the second time she said that she was busy going to her grandfather's for dinner."

"Yeah she told me that too." Jacob confirms. At least she's maintaining the story if she is lying, but I have a feeling she isn't.

"So," I conclude. "She took a rain check with me."

"ALRIGHT!" Jake congratulates me. "Knew she couldn't resist the Cullen charm."

"I know, I know. I charm my women into submission." I mock. "By the way, what the hell did you say to her to piss her off?"

"Oh," Jake guffaws. "I might have proposed the idea that you two were fuck buddies."

"What?" My voice goes monotone and serious. "Are you fucking high?"

"What?" Jake asks innocently. "It disarmed her enough to agree to go out with you again."

"True." I scratch my chin. "But I'm sure she was also hyperventilating from embarrassment."

"She'll be fine." Jake blew it off. "Oop, Leah's here. Gotta go."

I make the whip cracking sound at him.

"You don't get to make that sound. At least my girlfriend knows how I feel about her. I'm serious man, just tell her. It'll make things so much easier."

"Yeah yeah." I whine. "Shut up and take your girlfriend out."

"See ya!" I hear the phone click at the other end.

"Who's taking their girlfriend out?" Emmett announces as he walks to the fridge. "Cause you sure as hell aren't."

"Jake." I answer hopping up on the countertop to sit.

"Ah," He tosses me a soda then pulls up some countertop for himself. "So did ya do it yet?"

"Do what?" I ask innocently.

"Don't play coy with me Eddie." He warns. "I saw the looks you were giving her Friday night. You have a raging hard on for Bella Swan."

"Come on Em." I wince, "Enough with that." He was right but I didn't want him to think he had me pegged.

"Fine," He takes a swig of soda. "But you didn't answer my question. Did you ask her out or did you pussy out?"

"Kind of both." I answer rolling my eyes. "I did ask her, but only after I had Jake ask her for me."

Emmett splutters, flecks of soda and spit spew out of his mouth. "You what?" Emmett asks incredulously.

"You heard me." I say. "I figure Bella's shy enough, maybe if I were to have someone she knows and trusts already break the ice that she'd be more agreeable."

"Oh," Emmett grabs a paper towel and wipes himself and the countertop up. "So what you're saying is that you didn't have the balls to look her in the eye and ask her out yourself. Just like you didn't have the balls to straight out kiss her on Friday."

"You ass," I jump off the counter. "First of all Rose wasn't supposed to tell you. And B, I didn't full out kiss her on Friday because Tanya was in the car. Had I done that Tanya probably wouldn't have stayed in the car at all. She would have gotten out, stormed over and forced her tongue down my throat to claim me." I shudder.

"I could imagine how that would've been." Emmett stares off. "What did she do instead?" He asks as he joins me back in the real world.

"As soon as I got in the car she started screaming at me. Telling me it was gross and weird that I kissed her hand goodnight. Then, when she saw I didn't care she switched gears and tried pawing at my junk like a cat in heat." I shudder again as I remember her very forward advances. I almost ran into a tree the first time she groped me.

"WHAT?" Emmett guffaws. "God! That is too funny. Here you are getting Tanya Denali to practically jump your bones and you're two goddamn twitterpated with Bella Swan to even want it. Where's your man card? I hereby seize it."

"Shut up." I order him. "Tanya is like a dog, once you give her a bone she'll keep coming back to you for more. If I give it to her, then I'll never get her off me."

"Nice bone reference." Emmett chortles. "I'm sure your bone is going to be nice and dry once you give it to Bella." He shakes his head unfathomably.

"Who's giving what to Bella?" Rose chimes in.

"Eddie here is giving Bella a bone." Emmett chuckles.

"Fuck you with something hard and sandpapery." I threaten.

"That's not nice Edward." Emmett whines. "I want a bone, not sandpaper." I roll my eyes and look at Rose.

"Well I just got off the phone with Bella." Rose gloats as she heads to the fridge.

"Really?" I ask with more enthusiasm in my voice then I would have liked to show right in that moment. "What did she say?"

"Nothing." Rose waves her hand dismissively. "I was just asking her what day works best for a shopping trip. She said she'd get back to me."

"Oh," I answer.

Emmett smacks Rose's ass as she leans farther over to grab a Diet Coke from the back of the fridge. "See that's how you do it Eddie. Claim her by showing her who's boss."

"Emmett," she scolds as she stands up. "Stop it or the candy shop is closed for business for a week."

Emmett's face falls. "Sorry babe."

"Where's your man card?" I tease. "I'm seizing it." He gives me the middle finger in response.

"Seriously Edward," Rose whines. "Please don't put Bella in a situation she doesn't want to be in. She's emotionally in a hard place right now. With leaving everything in Phoenix and moving here she feels insecure and unsure of herself and her place in this school."

"I understand Rose." I do.

Bella is so easily startled and blushes so quickly that if you blink, you'd miss what made her do it. But underneath all that she still has this spark.

I saw it the first time when she came after me with the condiments and then again last night when I had kissed her hand. I have to find out what it is and pull that part of her out. I've made it my personal goal.

I walk out of the kitchen and up the staircase. I take a right and head to the last door on the left. My and Emmett's rooms are on this side of the second floor, Alice's and the guest room are on the other side along with the bathroom. Mom and Carlisle's room takes up most of the third floor, along with Carlisle's study and Esme's office.

My room is gold, black and brown. I throw myself onto the bed that fills up most of the room and stare at the ceiling for a while. I grab for my IHome remote and turn my music on. Lux Aeterna by Clint Mansell begins slow and quiet. One of my fantasies is to make love to a woman to this song.

I lean over the side of my bed and grab an old Merck Index my dad gave to me. I shuffle toward the back and grab out my copy of "Big N' Busty", a copy Emmett had given me on my sixteenth birthday to shock me.

It had quickly become my favorite nudey magazine. I tried looking through Playboy and Penthouse, but nothing ever piqued my interest. All those women looked so fake and unnaturally skinny. This magazine had women who looked like...women.

I knew that if Emmett found out that I still had this copy I'd never hear the end of it. If anyone at school found out that I preferred thicker women, then I'd be mocked religiously until the end of time.

That's why when I first saw Bella I was immediately attracted and repulsed by her presence. I was attracted to her sexually, but repulsed because her being at the school made my dirty little secret real, tangible and oh so potent.

I, Edward Cullen, am a closet chubby chaser, and Bella Swan is my kryptonite.