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19. A New Level of Intimacy

Carlos and I kissed and spent the afternoon in each other's arms. We ventured into the pool once more and continued kissing, but never escalating to a more physical connection. We were both happy to explore this new facet of our relationship slowly and responsibly.

"God Babe, just kissing you is the most erotic thing I have ever experienced in my life."

I knew exactly what he meant, so I simply nodded and continued to run my hands along his chest. We stayed in each other's arms for the next few hours, kissing, talking and laughing.

Carlos' phone rang, drawing us both out of our little fantasy world. We both looked at the clock and realised that it was just after 4PM. I rolled over onto my stomach and stretched while Carlos spoke on the phone. I wasn't really listening to Carlos' half of the phone conversation so when I heard my name, I turned and looked at him.

He was nodding as he spoke, agreeing to something, but I couldn't follow what he was saying or determine who he was talking with. He hung up the phone and looked over at me before walking back and sitting beside me. He took my face in his hands and said, "Babe, that was my dad, he is my ride home tonight and he invited you to join us for dinner. I think he is concerned about you and this is his way of ensuring that you are doing OK. I can drive you back later."

I was a bit disappointed that we had to return to the real world, but I hadn't seen Maria in a couple of weeks, so I agreed that dinner wouldn't be too much of a hardship.

"The girls are out this evening, so it'll just be us and my folks. We can choose the topics of conversation and we can direct them away from anything you don't want to discuss. We are supposed to meet my father at his office in about 50 minutes. Did you want to shower beforehand?"

"Yeah, I've got sun block and sweat all over me. A shower is probably a good idea. I shouldn't be long."

I kissed Carlos and left him lying on the sun lounger while I went for a shower.

I emerged from the shower in a fresh t-shirt and jeans. I spent a few moments on my hair and makeup. When I was content with my appearance, I grabbed my bag and made my way out to the living room. Carlos had been busy while I was in the shower. He covered over the pool, put away our chairs, cleaned up the mess from lunch and was ready and waiting for me.

Carlos placed his arm around my shoulder and kissed me on my forehead as we walked to the elevator. Once in the elevator, I turned to Carlos and kissed him gently on the lips. We had no time to deepen the kiss because the elevator was very quick, so we walked out of my building hand in hand towards the office.

We walked two blocks in a comfortable silence when I saw our reflection in the window. I had an odd feeling so I pulled my hand from Carlos' and tucked it in my pocket. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow, but I wasn't sure why I had that reaction.

"Do you mind if we keep what has happened between us to ourselves for now? I don't know why, but I feel like I need to be comfortable with us before I can share that with the rest of the world."

Carlos smiled. "I completely understand where you're coming from. Part of me wants to shout about you from the rooftops, but another part wants to keep you to myself. I've wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you, so I'll have to work extra hard not to touch you or do something that will make you uncomfortable in public. As a start, I'm going to put my own hands in my pockets because the urge to touch you is pretty strong right now."

I laughed, bumped my shoulder into Carlos and continued walking. We reached the office just in time to meet Ricardo on his way down to the car. He congratulated us on our impeccable timing and filled me in on one of the investigations I had helped with the previous week.

"The FBI has decided to pursue a RICO case against our client using the information you uncovered. They may come to see you at the office, but they won't need to involve you in the case. They may just question you about your techniques in uncovering this information.

The agent who spoke to me was impressed with your findings. They had been after this guy for three years with nothing to show for it, even though they had highly trained forensic accountants searching this whole time. I am very proud of your accomplishments and the attention the FBI seems to be giving to this case may mean additional work for our firm in the future."

I climbed into the backseat of the car as we made our way to the Manoso's. Ricardo and Carlos kept up the conversation, requiring little input from me. I was trying to sort out the events of today and how my feelings had changed. I was sad about Ryan but I was also relieved. On the other hand, I was happy about Carlos and me but it was so new that I didn't really know what to think of it.

When we arrived at the Manoso's Maria met us at the door and hugged me as soon as I was past the threshold.

"Stephanie dear, Ricardo tells me you've had some unpleasant news today. Come in and we can talk about it if you'd like."

I turned and looked at Ricardo and Carlos and then followed Maria into the kitchen. She walked over to the stove as Ricardo walked in and kissed her on the cheek.

"Carlos is going to have a shower. He mentioned that you two enjoyed some time in the pool and he wanted to wash off the sun block and chlorine."

I nodded and watched as Ricardo pulled out a stool and indicated that I should sit.

"Stephanie, how can we help?"

I looked at Ricardo and saw the concern on his face. It was the same look that Carlos had earlier, so I knew I could tell him and Maria everything without them judging me. I explained the meeting with Detective Carter and the news he shared with me and they were very sympathetic to everything I had been through and how the news must have upset me.

Maria looked at me for moment and it seemed to me like she conflicted about something. I looked directly at her and expected her to look away after a moment, but she studied me instead.

"Stephanie dear, I know this may be none of my business, but can you explain why your first call was to Carlos?"

I was surprised by her question, but not because of the change in the relationship between Carlos and me, but because other than her and Ricardo, Carlos was the only person in Newark that I trusted.

"It's more about geography than anything Maria. Carlos was the closest friend I trusted. When I called him, my only intention was to talk on the phone. When he insisted on meeting for lunch, I didn't realise until he showed up how much I needed a friend. He recognised my need for a friend before I did. I can't thank him enough for taking care of me. You should be very proud of raising such a good man. He's been a great friend to me through this whole ordeal."

Ricardo and Maria thanked me for my kind words but Maria was still watching me intently. I can't be sure, but I was beginning to think that she might suspect something that she wasn't saying. I was having trouble admitting my feelings for Carlos to myself. If I tell anybody about my changed feelings, I should probably tell Carlos before admitting it to his mother.

Ricardo kissed Maria and went to change before dinner, leaving Maria and I alone. She was facing the stove so I asked if I could help at all. She declined any help, but she did turn to face me as she stirred some sauce on the stove.

"There's something else dear, I can tell that you didn't say everything earlier."

I stared at her and debated what I should say, not wanting to deceive her in any way.

"I don't know why but I feel guilty about what has happened to Ryan. If I paid more attention to him when we were together, I could have gotten him help before he passed that point of no return. But that's only part of the guilt I feel. I am also feeling guilty at the relief I felt when Detective Carter told me about his coma. Guilt at the relief I felt because I could move on with my life and leave him behind."

"You shouldn't feel guilty about either of those things Stephanie. You are not responsible for Ryan's drug use and from the sounds of it, you are better off without him in your life. You should not feel guilt over moving on with your life or finding someone else to love. You deserve your happiness dear, but you can't let your past interfere with the present or the future."

Maria hugged me as I tried to stifle the tears that filled my eyes. She was so supportive of me and more like a mother to me than my own.

I wiped my tears and looked into Maria's face. "Thanks Maria, you've been so wonderful to me. You encourage me and support me no matter what, just like I always wished my mother would. Your children are lucky to have your love and support."

"Ever since Carlos brought you into our home, I've felt protective over you. I keep hoping that you will be a daughter to me someday, if you and Carlos ever figure out what's right in front of you, but in the meantime, I'm happy to support you in any way I can."

I blushed at her words, but said nothing to indicate that her desires may have recently become my desires as well. I wasn't sure I was ready to admit that, especially since the future, mostly the fact that Carlos may join the army was so unknown. I wanted to get used to the idea of a relationship with Carlos before we broadcast ourselves to the entire world.

Maria sensed my deep thoughts and said, "Dinner will be ready in about 20 minutes. Why don't you go rest in the sitting room and wait for Carlos. We'll call you when we're ready to eat."

I smiled at Maria's kindness and went and sat on the sofa. I sat where Carlos normally sat, feeling a little rebellious and partially hoping for some sort of teasing confrontation. I realised when I was speaking to Maria that I really wanted to have a relationship with Carlos, but I didn't see the point if we both weren't on the same page. I wanted monogamy, transparency and trust. I just hoped that Carlos feels the same way.

I leaned my head back on the sofa and rested my eyes while I waited. I must have been more exhausted than I thought because I was awoken a few minutes later when Carlos brushed the back of his hand against the side of my face and said, "Wake up Babe."

I opened my eyes to warm brown eyes and a beautiful smile.

"Is it dinner time already?"

"No Babe, Mama says it will be another 10 minutes or so. She said that you came in here, so I thought I'd join you."

"Carlos, there's something I have to tell you, and I'm not really sure how to phrase it, so please be patient with me as I try to get the words out."

Carlos sat on the sofa beside me, leaving some space between us and waited for me to finish my thoughts.

"When I was talking to your mother earlier, I realised that I have a lot of guilt over what has happened to Ryan. As a result, I was closing myself off and avoiding anything that would worsen those feelings. I think that is why I was never really willing to get close to you or to open myself up to you.

"I know now that I can't ignore my feelings for you, but at the same time, I can't ignore the guilt I feel over what happened between Ryan and me. As a result, I want you to know that I do want a relationship with you, but with some agreements from you ahead of time."

Carlos took my hand and kissed it gently before placing it back at my side. "I'll give you whatever you want Babe, just for the chance to be with you."

"What I need from you is loyalty, truth and honesty. If you can provide that, I will do the same and we can move forward. I just want to make sure that we're on the same page before we go any further."

"I know you've had issues with trust in the past, and I'll do everything I can to erase those failings from your mind. I will treat you with respect, talk to you if I have a problem, and most of all, I'll listen when you need an ear or are upset. I want to be with you Babe. You deserve to be with someone who appreciates everything that you are and I can't wait to be able to tell everyone that you have agreed to be my girlfriend."

"Before we tell anyone, I think we have to play a little trick on your parents for setting us up last month."

Carlos' eyes went wide and an evil grin spread across his face. "Leave it to me Babe. I have the perfect idea."

I followed Carlos into the dining room where his mother was setting the table. We helped place the last few plates around the table and then sat across from each other as instructed. Maria and Ricardo carried in the food and then sat down at the ends of the table.

I was nervous about whatever Carlos was planning, and it must have showed because both Ricardo and Maria kept looking at me as we ate. When we were finished, Maria asked if we wanted dessert now, or if we wanted to wait a bit and have it in the sitting room.

"Actually Mama, there's something that we have to tell you and Papa, and I'm not sure you're going to like it much."

Both Maria and Ricardo looked at Carlos before indicating that he should proceed.

"Do you remember the day we helped Stephanie move into her apartment?" After a nod from both, he proceeded. "Well, a funny thing happened that night, and without going into too much detail, Stephanie and I were forced to share a bed. At the time, we were emotionally raw and probably not thinking very clearly. Anyway, one thing led to another, and we slept together.

"The next morning, Stephanie and I agreed that neither of us was ready for a relationship, so we decided to stay friends. Stephanie found out some news yesterday about Ryan, but that wasn't the only thing she discovered. This other news is why she contacted me. Mama, Papa, Stephanie's going to have a baby."

I choked on my drink and both Maria and Ricardo's mouths opened as they stared back and forth between us. I couldn't stand the worry and mixed emotions running across their faces so I intervened. I glared at him and he did have the good sense to look a little guilty.

"Carlos! I'm sorry Maria, Ricardo, but I am not pregnant. Carlos and I realised that the spare room linens had a little help to disappear and we wanted to play a joke on you. I didn't think Carlos would take it this far, especially because we may have shared a bed, but that's that happened and Carlos knows it."

"Ricardo Carlos Manoso, what kind of a joke is that to play on your parents? Your father and I raised you better than that. How do you ever expect this young woman to see you as anything other than an immature jokester when you do things like that?"

"Maria, calm down dear. Carlos and Stephanie just wanted us to know that they didn't appreciate the little push we gave them. It's clear that it didn't work as we'd have liked, but they have a valid reason for being upset."

I looked at Carlos and he was watching my reactions to the conversation around the table. I wasn't sure how I could interrupt, so I cleared my throat.

"Ricardo, Maria, are you two saying that you want me and your son to be together?"

Both nodded and looked a little embarrassed by their admission, but they didn't look away in shame.

"Mama and Papa, you should know that your attempts to push us together failed. Neither of us was really ready for a relationship, regardless of our attraction or chemistry. Pushing us together that night only made things more awkward between us, but we did manage to recognise that it was too soon for anything other than friendship."

Maria sat up straight and watched Carlos intently as he spoke. When he finished, she looked over at me and smiled. "Did I hear you say 'neither of us was ready'? Does that mean that you are now?" The look of excitement spread across her face as she waited for us to reply.

"When I first met Carlos, he was a polite stranger who unintentionally exposed my boyfriend for the cheating sleaze that he was. Our friendship progressed, I started working for you Ricardo, and there was never a point where I felt anything but platonic friendship for Carlos.

"Even after Carlos admitted his feelings for me, I pushed him away. Ryan's betrayal was still raw, as was his assault and the break-in at my apartment. In a nutshell, I was a mess, and I needed time to heal, so Carlos and I stayed friends. When I heard the news from Detective Carter this morning, the only person I wanted to talk to was Carlos. He had been there for me throughout the whole ordeal, and I just wanted to hear his voice.

"When Carlos actually rearranged his schedule with Tom, something awakened in me. Carlos and I have spent the afternoon talking and we have decided that we are more than just friends. We have feelings for each other, and we are going to see where that leads us. I hope you two are OK with this."

All three Manosos were smiling at me. Carlos had a dopey love-sick grin, Maria had tears in her eyes as she beamed at me and Ricardo was nodding his head as he smiled.

"I think I can safely speak for Maria when I say that we are OK with you dating Carlos. We both watched the two of you interact and saw how great you would be together. We're very happy, but we want to assure both of you that we will not pressure you in any way. If things between you don't work out for any reason, we'll still love you both. We'll be disappointed, but we won't take that out on either of you."

For the rest of the evening, the four of us talked about many topics, but we didn't really talk about Carlos' and my relationship, for which I was grateful. We did discuss the girls staying with me one weekend, so we set a tentative date and worked out that Maria would drop the girls off on the following Friday after work. She'd leave her car with me so Carlos could get home that evening and then she'd meet Ricardo at his office.

I thanked both Ricardo and Maria for their kindness as I hugged them on the way out the door later that evening.

When Carlos pulled up in front of my building, he leaned over and kissed me. Until now, our kisses had been light and sweet, but this one was passionate and left us breathing heavily when I pulled back. I placed my hand on Carlos' thigh and kissed him again.

"You're playing with fire Babe."

"Maybe I want to get burned."

"As much as I'd love to, I have to be up in 5 hours. I don't want to rush anything between us, so we'll have to have to have a bit of patience."

He walked me to the entrance, kissed me one last time and promised to call me the next day as he drove away.

The next chapter will not be up for a few days as I'll be travelling. I'm hoping to get one or two up while I'm away, but I won't make any promises.

L.