This came from the video of the same name. It is both funny, and awesome. Be mindful of some language. ENJOY!
It was the afternoon in the World That Never Was, and Xaldin just came back from the store. But he didn't get what the list said.
"Xaldin. The grocery list asks for lettuce, toilet paper, corn flakes for Vexen, tomato soup, meadow fresh deodorant for Marluxia... oh and it seems Axel wanted bunny." Xemnas the leader read the list to Xaldin who was sweating. "...Yeah?..." He ask. Xemnas firmly told him "This is NOT meadow fresh deodorant Xaldin. This is a knife." As he points at the object at the table beside the bag. "We needed knifes!" Xaldin quickly said. "Where are the lettuce, toilet paper, corn flakes, and tomato soup Xaldin?" Xemnas ask him. Xaldin said nervously "Uh... the store was... OUT! Out of... all that. Yeah." Xemnas ask with a fire in his eyes "And the bunny?" Xaldin gulped as he said "...You don't want to know about the bunny."
The next day.
A car pulled up in front of a store as people stepped out the first is Demyx ranked 9, Roxas ranked 13, Xigbar ranked 2, and Xemnas as he said "Alright we're here. Xaldin stay in the car." "What!? Why!?" Xaldin ask shocked. Xemnas firmly answered "Because the last time you went shopping furry things DIED." Xaldin nodded and sat. Axel ranked 8 stepped out as the Organization walked to the entrance with Axel lagging as Xemnas called out "Hurry up Axel!" Axel made a demon smirked and said in a song voice "Cominggg!" Then the car exploded as Axel said "That's for Mr Bunny b&#%h."
After they went inside Xemnas announced to Roxas, Xigbar, Demyx, and Axel "Alright the grocery list is as followed page 1: Orange Juice. Milk. Cheese. Eggs. Tuna. Chocolate. Page 2: Paper Towels. Glue. Hair Ties. Bottled Water. Bandaids. Tylenol... Oh i didn't see that last one. Larxene's handwriting is kind of hard to read... t... ta... tam... tamp... TAMPONS!?" Xigbar quickly grabbed the first paper and said as he said "Right. Page one. All of us. Mad cool!" As he ran to an isle with Demyx following, and Axel pushing Roxas to follow. Xemnas narrowed his eyes and said "I hate you all."
With the others.
While Roxas was checking a box Xigbar said "Whoa. Xemny's one to talk. His handwriting totally bites! 'Groceries' looks like 'Grocones'!" "Hehe. Grocones. That's spanish for balls." Demyx chuckled. Axel rolled his eyes and said "That's 'Cajones' Dumbass." "What? Why would you know-" "...Axel how do you know that!?" A curious Roxas ask. Xigbar quickly throw a sheet of paper to him as he shoved Demyx and said "We'll tell you when your older little dude. Now go find some of these for me will ya?" "Don't touch me!" Axel said avoided Demyx as he followed Xigbar. Roxas looked at the sheet and paled at the word.
Condoms.
He whimpered as a dust ball passed by.
Xigbar told Demyx once they are away from Roxas "And you! Shopping foul: Abuse of a foreign language." "Penalty Time?" Axel ask with a smirk. "Penalty Time." Xigbar said with a smirk. Then they turned black and growed in front of Demyx as he ask nervously "P...Penalty?"
Meanwhile Xemnas stopped in front of his destination as he muttered "Kingdom Hearts strike me dead where i stand." "AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGG!" He turned around seeing Demyx on a cart, with toilet paper wrapped around his eyes being ride on against one of the isles. "Ow! My Grocones!" Demyx said underneath the stuff. Xemnas sweatdropped.
Meanwhile with Roxas he just stopped in front of a shelf and ask "THEY COME IN SIZES!?"
Xemnas facepalmed and said "One word out of you three and i let Xaldin have his stabby way with you." "I'm not sure which sounds worse the interpretation of that innuendo or without." Axel said not sounding like he cared. Xemnas muttered "Your parents should have been shot for making you." "Sorry sir but the price isn't coming up on these." The cashier said snapping Xemnas from his train of thought. "I'm sorry what?" He ask her. She said "I'm sorry but the barcode on this box of Tampons seems to be damaged. Let me do a price check."
Xemnas only muttered two words: "Oh God."
She said on the phone "Can i get a price check on one box of mountain breeze, quiet package-" Axel snorted, Demyx giggled, and Xigbar said "Xemny's got a quiet package." "I heard that and i'm killing you all." Xemnas said threatening. The cashier continued "The extra large, collapsible, easy application, pearl-tip-" "Look here ten thousand money keep the change." Xemnas quickly said giving her the money hoping that would work. Unfortunately luck was not on his side as the cashier finished "Tampons."
The word 'Tampons' echoed 5 times as Xemnas turned black in embarrassment, as an old lady looked, a guy at a deli looked, some people looked, and a little kid looked. That might've set a nerve in Xemnas as he yelled "YES! TAMPONS! I XEMNAS SUPERIOR OF THE ORGANIZATION, MASTER OF ALL NOBODIES, LORD OF CASTLE OBLIVION, AND FINAL BOSS OF KINGDOM HEARTS II, A BUYING TAMPONS! LITTLE THINGS LARXENE WANTS STUCK IN HER UNMENTIONABLES FOR NO REASON I AND MY Y-CHROMOSOMES CAN POSSIBLY COMPREHEND! TAMPONS! LET'S SAY IT SOME MORE! TAMPONS TAMPONS TAMPONS TAMPONS TAMPONS! TTTTTAAAAAAMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPOOOOOOONNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"
Xemnas breath heavily for a few moments before he started sobbing. "There goes a broken man." Axel said. Demyx replied "No kidding." "Have a nice daaay-eee!" Xigbar said as everyone exited with Xemnas weeping.
Meanwhile...
"THEY COME IN FLAVORS!?" Roxas screamed while gripping his head.
Poor Xemnas, and Roxas for that. I hope those two can recover. Be sure to review!
