Title: Valley Girl

Author: landofthekwt

Genre: Valley Girl

Word Count: 927

Rating: R

Pairings: Sesshoumaru/Kikyou, Inuyasha/Kagome

Warning: Rape,violence, sexual reference Wilted Rose Week 9-Altternate Universe

Summary: Kikyou helps out Kagome on her first day of school

A/N My thanks to salomesensei who inspired this piece with "Dear Diary" and our discussion of

"Girls Just Want to Have Fun"

Amaterasu greeted her.

It was so awesome, thought Kikyou. Another perfect day of being the Valley Girl Kami at San Fernando Valley High. She almost floated to the school that she loved so well. Today's assignment was to brighten the day of a young Japanese girl named Highurashi Kagome who had just moved her from Tokyo. Kikyou would play the part of host for the young shrine girl anything to accommodate her to life in the Valley. She would have fit the girl in between cheerleader practice and student council meetings.

Kagome was waiting for her inside the principal's office. Kikyou was shocked at the way she dressed. She was so not cool. Seriously, she was in need of a make over. They would have to make a trip to the mall before anyone saw her dressed like a Tokyo high school student.

After a trip to Sherman Oaks Galleria. Kikyou was proud of what she had done. The girl was bitching. She was a regular Betty, fer shur. Unfortunately, upon their return the administration was not pleased by their absence. They were so not cool about it. Their attitude was so gnarly. How did they expect Kagome to show up at class wearing that uniform. As if

So they gave Kagome detention for skipping classes. Whatever. At least Kagome looked seriously hot now. Seriously, Kikyou wondered where their priorities were. As if those classes were so important. Whatever.

Kikyou took Kagome to the lunch room. When Kagome looked at the American food that was offered it was enough to barf her out. Well, duh. what does one expect from American cafeteria food. Kikyou changed the food to Tokyo fast food. For sure, it would not hurt the Americans to eat ramen. It was after all totally one of the basic food groups. .

Kikyou's magic did not have the desired result. When faced with ramen, the American began throwing the food at each other. Kikyou pleased with herself had already left the establishment.

It was only when Kagome emerged covered with ramen. that Kikyou realized her disgust at Kagome's appearance. The first words that came from her lips were " Gag me with a spoon." Kagome was grody to the max. It took a shower and borrowing Kikyou's spare outfit that returned some sunshine to the girl's face.

By that time all the classes were over and it was time for cheerleading practice. Kikyou would introduce Kagome to all of her popular friends and soon she would be That would so awesome.

Unfortunately, nothing went right at cheerleading practice. The other girls were pissed off that Kagome was allowed to join without a tryout. They kept missing her on catches allowing her to hit the floor straight on. At the end they convinced her to take the top of the pyramid. One of the girls just happened to slip toppling Kagome onto the floor head first. Kikyou had to take her outside and heal her. How could such a radical idea have gone so wrong.

Kikyou thought about to make it up to new girl. She came up with such an tripendicular she was down, she always got better after a date. That Inuyasha he was such a Baldwin. He owed her a favor. Seriously, this would perk up Kagome's day.

The Taisho brothers were in the parking lot polishing their Harleys. They looked so hot in their leathers. When Kikyou looked at Sesshoumaru all she could think that she had died and gone to heaven. His brother was perfect for Kagome.

Inuyasha was agreeable to going on a date with Kagome. Sesshoumaru gave him a knowing wink as put his arm around the Valley Girl Kami and led her away. Before they had left the parking lot Inuyasha had Kagome spreadeagled over the back of his hog squealing like a stuck pig.

All Kikyou could think about was how totally hot Sesshoumaru was. There were stars in her eyes as they arrived at the local motel. She did not notice that they rented rooms by the hour. All she could think was OMG OMG OMG as he took her again and again.

When he left the room, she basked in the after glow. The day had been so tubular. She had helped Kagome in so many ways. Learning how to shop and what to wear. Providing her with edible food. Making new friends for her. Finding her a best thing that happened was that Sesshoumaru had made her a women. Surely, he would let her wear his letter jacket or wear his class ring. In her mind she was already picking out china patterns.

Just then the manager banged on the door.

"Hey lady, you want to get a move on. Your hour is up We got other customers waiting to use the room. And by the way, your buddy's credit card was not accepted. If you do not make it good

we will have to call the police."

Somehow she would have to explain the charges to Amaterasu. She was not going to let anything ruin what been a totally radical day of being Kikyou. Valley Girl Kami.

Addendum: From Wikipedia Article on "Valley Girl" in Italics

Main article: Valspeak

A certain sociolect associated with Valley Girls, referred to as "Valspeak," became common across the United States during the 1980s and 1990s, and much entered teenage slang throughout the country.

Qualifiers such as "like", "way", "as if!", "totally" and "duh" were interjected in the middle of phrases and sentences as emphasizers. Narrative sentences were often spoken as though they were questions (high rising terminal).

Examples:

* As if – lit. "as if" except it does not use a subject; expresses disbelief.

* Bitchin' - adj. slang for excellent; first-rate.

* Whatever! - short for "whatever you say"; sarcastic comeback.

* Barf me out! - "So disgusting it makes me want to vomit."

* Fer shur – lit. "For sure"

* Betch – lit. "Bitch"

* Totally – "I agree" or "completely."

* Tubular – Excellent, perfect, as in a (surfable) wave that forms a tube.

* Grody to the max! – "As gross as he/she/it can be."

* Like, oh my God – can be used many ways; expresses shock (OMG for short).

* I'm suuure! or I'm so sure – "I'm absolutely positive," but usually used sarcastically.

* Tre - A synonym for "very" (derived from French "très")

* Tripendicular! - It can mean either "awesome" or a drug high.

* Totally Radical, Dude! – "That is incredible, man."

* Betty - An attractive woman.

* Gnarly - Off the hook, totally extreme - good or bad.

* So - Very; used too often and said with too much emphasis. "He's so not cute!"

* Baldwin - An attractive man.

* Seriously - Frequent interjection of approval.

* Gag me with a spoon! - expression of disgust.

* "That's Hot" - Sexy, Cool, Stylish