Author's Note: So this kind of started out as one thing, but then kind of transformed into a page ripped out of my FF BFF's fanfiction, Homeless (which you should totally check out: Homeless by AL3110; it's in my fav stories. READ IT! I DEMAND YOU DO IT).
So now that I'm done with your daily dose of me being weird...
Day Forty-Six: I Can't Lie by Maroon 5
"You weren't stupid to like her for that long. Stop saying that. You're just upset. Maybe you just need to sleep it off."
Sleep it off.
He figured that if anyone would know the pain he was in, it would be Caleb, but he was evidently wrong.
"Just forget it. I don't care anymore," he said before storming off to his room in the apartment.
He was lying. He cared. He cared a lot.
He noticed for the first time that morning—the morning after this mess—just how cold it was, in the dead of summer. He was used to waking up to Spencer lying on top of him.
But now he was there, alone. It was cold without her there.
She'd been stuck in his head for as long as she had been gone.
He unconsciously reached out to touch her hair. He could've sworn he had almost heard her laugh. But then he turned and realized that he was just dreaming of her. It could have killed him.
He was walking in Rosewood Square, as per his usual Saturday morning routine. He kept finding himself stumbling on the cracks in the pavement.
He glanced in The Brew, thinking about going in for coffee. He noticed Spencer sitting in there with a man. She was smiling with him. It made him upset on the inside.
He sort of wished he could be the person to make her laugh.
Still, he swallowed his pride and walked into the coffee shop. He tried to avoid looking in her direction. But of course, the more he tried to not think of her, the more he just thought of her. Her and her perfect smile and beautiful eyes and perfect lips…
He snapped out of it as he gave the barista his money.
But his eyes wandered off as she was preparing his coffee. He looked over his shoulder at Spencer, but only briefly. As he turned back to the counter, he realized how unfair everything was. Now, just as he had composed himself, she just decided to walk away? When he finally wanted to talk about everything that was bothering her and more…it was over.
And to make things even better, she found someone new.
"Toby?"
He turned around as the barista handed him his coffee and he accepted it. It was the brunette that occupied his mind for so long.
"Hey. Can we talk?"
He was stunned. He looked past her shoulder to see that the man she was talking to had left.
"Sure."
"I can't lie. You've been on my mind lately. I really miss you, but…I know that what we had…we can't get back. Not ever again. No matter how much we both want that. So I didn't want to ask you for forgiveness or pity or anything, but as long as we're talking…I feel like I should be honest with you."
She was silent.
"And I'm sorry that I never really told you that when we were together, but…I just didn't know how. And I regret it, too."
She nodded. "I agree."
He stared at her, quite confused. "What do you mean?"
"I mean…I did the same. And I'm sorry. And I didn't handle it the right way. I can come up with a thousand different things to say to you right now, but they're never going to properly describe just how much it hurts to think about us because…how I ended things wasn't right."
He thought about that. It warmed his heart a bit. "Really?"
She nodded. "I'm really sorry. And it doesn't negate all the bad things we did to each other…all the lies and the secrets…but I really miss you. I can't lie about that."
"I think maybe lying is what got us into this mess in the first place."
She began to laugh and he was glad to see her smile.
"Maybe we could try to start over. No pretenses or pasts. Just the present. And the truth," he proposed.
She nodded in agreement. "I like the sound of that. The truth."
Addictedtospoby: Well you're lucky compared to some of my New Yorker counterparts. They've already lost like half of their Spring Break, which must really suck. And I just can't come up with a book idea. BUT I just went to the book store and saw a book published by some really popular writer on Wattpad (which is like FanFiction, or so I've been told), which makes me feel a bit better. But I cannot come up with a simple freaking idea! Jeez!
MizzIsTheFizz:The writers make me so mad because they make us fall in love with the couples, but it shouldn't be all about them! And yeah, I can't wait for my sleepover! I'm so excited to see my friends again. Some, I haven't seen since like September. Thank you. Oh, thanks for the tips. I remember hearing that your muscles relax in warmer weather/warm water/steam. Like I just heard it's good for flexibility (but bad if you're sprained or broken). Okay, thanks anyway! I guess I'll stick to the basics until I can get a pirouette down, then I'll work my way up to a la secondes and fouettes and Italian fouettes (because they're so pretty). But pirouettes and then multiple pirouettes. Got it. Thank you very much!
FabsirellaPrincessOfPopcornia:I'd say my angst is a lot better than mu fluff. But thanks! And I really liked the library scene. Being only 5', I'd love it if a guy got a book off the top shelf for me at the library.
I will be catching up on my sleep and writing A LOT this weekend.
Nothing very rant-worthy happened to me this weekend. But am I the only one who's noticed that every time someone writes about how Toby loves the smell of Spencer's hair, they say she used apple-scented shampoo? Like, I don't know about you, but my hair smells like hair. And regular shampoo. Sometimes it smells like flowers. But I have never seen Apple shampoo at Walmart. I use herbal essences.
The next one-shot will be My Same by Adele and I actually quite enjoyed writing that. It was fun for me.
Please leave me a review/follow/favourite! They are always much appreciated! I love getting feedback! Bye! -Kayson