Why was she here? What was the point in doing it now other than to get it over with sooner rather than later; like ripping a plaster from the skin in one swift motion. Taking a deep steadying breath she knocked daintily on the door in a series of three and waited to be answered. Her hands had worked there way under her arms, hidden between her armpits and held in by the squeezing of her joints as she watched the floor. She could see shadows moving under the door, hear footsteps and finally a confused silence as the occupant came face to face with a pensive Karian Motter.
"Can we talk?" Her head tilted upwards but her eyes did not quite meet his.
"If you must speak." Balder sighed taking a step inward to allow her room to enter.
She nodded, brushing past him on the balls of her feet with her arms still folded tightly about her as if cold. His place was really kind of nice, she had to admit, not all gaudy and everything gold as seemed the custom. It was homely, a lot of heavy woods with etched designs and practical items. Actually, it was basically an interior designers representation of Balder right down to his purple pastel colour scheme.
"Nice place you got." She tried a little small talk as he shut the door and joined her closer to the centre of the main room.
"Thank you." He gave a slow survey of the area as if assuring himself of her words. "I have crafted many of these pieces during peaceful times."
"Oh, are there many of those?"
"I have not yet completed the dining set."
Caught off guard by his straight faced sense of humor - or so she hoped – colliding with her high-strung nerves, Kari chuckled letting her arms unfold as she visibly relaxed. It made it easier to say what she came to say, especially when she peeked a glimpse of the warrior's slight smile before he turned away to sit.
"I uh… came because I wanted to apologise for… um… alright let me start that again." She was rubbing the back of her neck, Balder watching her from his seat giving them the odd appearance of a director auditioning an actor for the lead role. "I get kind of mean when I'm upset with people. And you kind of upset me yesterday but that's not what I came to talk about so… argh… let me start again… again." Balder stayed where he was, expression of curious neutrality in tact just waiting to see where this was leading. "What I meant to say is, I'm sorry about bitching when we were sparring, I didn't mean it… well I didn't mean it that much. Like I said I just get kind of mean when I'm upset. It's a horrible personality trait. So… yeah… sorry for that. I know you're not that much of a ba- Oh god I'm doing it again. No, you're not a bastard, not unless your parents aren't married which I don't know about and is really kind of uh… I mean, I'm illegitimate too so… ugh… Can I start again?"
"Thor is right, you are very brave." Balder smiled, not unkindly.
"Huh?"
"Lacking in clarity of your own mind but pioneering forward, admitting when you are wrong, apologizing when the other is not entirely in the right and able to speak your mind when in the grasps of fear."
"Um? I think you mean stubborn stupidity there, Balder." She shook her head, brow knitted to form a look of disbelief. "I've got plenty of that."
"Bravery is to overcome our weaknesses and stand strong against what we know is wrong."
"Yeah… uh… so… apology accepted or is this going to be some mushy speech about how I'm more than I think I am and should stop acting like a child and go do something productive with my life because I've heard all that before in high school during detention and all I amounted to was a waitress with a cat that ran off with a queen and way to many drunken flashbacks of things that can never be unseen."
"I was only commenting on Thor's assessment." He raised a placating hand to calm his irate sounding guest.
"Good."
Well this was awkward, even Balder looked uncomfortable as he surveyed the room for the second time. Had she been picking fights again? Probably; listening to her words on mental playback it did sound kind of like meanness. She really needed to stop doing that.
"You have apologized to I and I must apologise to you for my behaviour yesterday." He was looking at her again, quite intently. "My words were unkind and incorrect."
"Yeah well… I was also being kind of mean then too. Serana drives me crazy…" She trailed off, frowning at the thought of the blonde boob monster. "But… what- why do you guys always go off with girls like her anyway?"
"I do not understand."
"Serana throws herself at you, Loki, Thor, Granddad and you all instantly fall head over heels and dance off under the moonlight with her." She paused, shaking her head to work away the jumble of thoughts entangling in her mind. "What the hell?"
"I can not speak for the others. I know not their consciousness." Balder straightened, and then readjusted his seated position clearly uncomfortable with his own line of thinking. "Serana reminded I of another."
"Another?" This peeked her interest.
"I do not wish to speak of it."
"Oh." He had been in love before, it was plain to see written all over his face now she took the time to study the darker circles under his eyes. "Well that's… hm." She slumped into the seat next to him, relieved in a sense that she had not actually been rejected for Serana but instead for a love interest from long ago. "I like you, you know."
"I know."
"No, I liiiiiike you."
"I know." He chuckled. "Your intentions have been clear for all to see. The pretense surrounding stance positioning did confuse at first, though your elbow-"
"I know, I know, keep it up." Kari rolled her eyes at the mantra of abuse about her weak elbow and all its dangling ways. "Me and my elbow have heard enough back chat about how we like to be casual. I can't help it. Have you ever tried to carry four plates or two platters with strong elbows? It's not possible, you need to give it a little droop and bend to get the balance right or you'll end up with cracked china all over the place." She demonstrated the waitress-carrying pose, picking up several objects on a table in front of her to balance along her arms. "See. My elbow knows exactly what it's doing outside the training yard, it's just inside that we get confused."
"I knew not there was skill involved in serving."
"Hunny, you have no idea." She laughed; carefully replacing all the things she took from the table back into their original spots. "Come do this job for the night and you'll never complain about war ever again."
"You exaggerate."
"Two words… children's parties. It's like simultaneously taking on the fiends of hell and being tortured as a prisoner of war."
"You have never been to Hel." He was angry.
"You've never done a children's party."
"Let us agree to disagree." He waved off the subject hoping for a truce instead of further arguing.
"And here I thought we were getting on again. Oh, you are aggravating."
"Your countenance is becoming unattractive once more."
"Well, if there is a position left for God of Melancholy be sure to tell whoever's in charge of that business I'm a good candidate."
"It would not suit." Balder leaned back in order to enjoy the hilarity of her words more fully.
"Oh I don't know about that. I swear Fandral has started getting wrinkles from the amount of misery I've given him. You've not been best pleased with me either."
"I am amused now."
"Yes well," she relaxed back into the seat besides him tired of straining her neck to keep him in her focus. "You'll be miserable again in a bit when I say something else stupid." Shaking her head, she almost laughed aloud as he frowned looking away with a serious expression etched into his features. "There, I've already done it."
"Do not…" He turned sharply, almost colliding with her before trailing off with a snort of defeat. "It is I that causes myself distress not you, Kari Fandralkin."
"Really?" She sounded skeptical but in a very preoccupied manner.
The warmth of his breath was mingling with her own; it was incredibly distracting especially when given the adorning bow that was the intensity within his eyes. It was tempting to reach forward, touch him in some manner, any manner. Was this the teenage hormones talking? How long was she staring at him? Time was beginning to feel abstracted from its correct pace. She felt terrified but he thought she was brave. Oh, who was she kidding, Kari Motter was the biggest idiot she knew and she knew a lot of people – the exception being Serana but she was too stupid to think of that bimbo at the time.
She bit her lip, he looked about to say something but he never was going to get to finish that sentence. What had she just done? Right, threw herself at Balder the brave and kissed him. At least he was not fighting back but she did not dare open her eyes in case he was staring at her with a dumbfounded shocked look.