Title: No Time For Friendship

Author: landofthekwt

Rating: PG-13

Prompt: Friendship (Spirits of Jewel series for The Wilted Rose)

Genre: Rats

Word Count: 1267

CU

Warning None

Summary: Kikyou wonders about friendship

Once her tree had been destroyed, she had come to destroy the source of the rats. It was good to act openly against Naraku. The hiding and waiting for his return had been humiliating and tedious. She was fully recovered and ready to face the Avatar of Hell again. He really did not need to kill humans just to get her out of hiding.

Naraku was bad enough, but he tweaked her by sending his little monster, Hakudoshi, to bring her out of hiding. A despicable little beast who was not a challenge worthy of her. She knew that Naraku was off somewhere laughing at all the bother that his little minion caused and all the trouble she had to go through to handle it.

The scene in the valley below intrigued her. Inuyasha's friends were vainly trying to fight off the rats trying to return to the miniature shrine. A woman was trying to drag a boy onto a nekomata while the cat vainly tried to carry them away from the rapidly growing pile of rats. A young novice monk was using a hole in his hand to suck as many of the rats as he could to keep them away from the others.

All of them were risking their own lives to save the others. Is this what friends did for each other? She knew these people only as Inuyasha's friends. Their names and theirs stories were a mystery to her. It puzzled her that people would care so much about others that they would put themselves at risk out of friendship.

Friendship was a concept which was alien to her. She had gone to the temple at an early age. At the temple she had been there to learn from the master. Friendships between acolytes were discouraged. Emphasis was placed upon reaching and maintaining the proper level of purity. No friendships were ever allowed between the master and his disciples. It was not proper.

She had returned to the village as it as their miko. Mikos had no friends. They were never to marry. Never to know love. They must remain pure in their service to the kami. All respected her and showed her deference, but none showed her friendship. She was alone. Her sister was ten years younger than herself. She was more like a daughter to her than a sibling. Kaede was too young to be the friend that she so desperately needed.

The situation had been exacerbated by the arrival of the Shikon no Tama. Every waking moment was seemingly spent in fighting off the youkai who coveted the Jewel. No one spoke to her anymore. No one allowed their children to play with her. She had never felt so alone.

It was in the midst of this loneliness that he had arrived. A weak hanyou trying to find his place in the world by becoming a youkai with the power of the jewel no worthy of her time. His persistence had amused her. He had no chance of taking the jewel from her. She could kill him any time she wished. Was he so desperate to rid himself of his hanyou existence that he would risk his life again and again?

Maybe it was that quality which attracted her to Inuyasha. In the end it was desperate loneliness that drew them together. They had huddled together against the cold wind that they both felt. The need to be together was desperate. Both of them were willing to sacrifice anything so that they could live as husband and wife. Only if the Jewel were gone could this end be achieved.

Were they friends then? She was not sure. She had loved him desperately. Was willing to give up everything for him. Felt betrayed by him, but in the end she could not live without him. Was that friendship? Apparently not. Her trust for him had been shattered the instant that she felt his claws tear her flesh. All that remained was love, sorrow and hate.

When she was resurrected, she had tried to hate him. Then she had tried to love him. But she had seen that someone else had taken her place. He would never be hers again, They might meet to exchange news about Naraku, but nothing would ever be the way that it was. He was just a memory to her A collection of might have beens. She was just a duty to him, a life debt because she had died following after him.

Since then she had been on her own private crusade to rid the world of had no time for love or friendship. Since her desperation had increased. She needed to expel Naraku and the Jewel from the world as soon as possible. Her weakness had forced her to seek out Kagome's help to heal her. Inuyasha had made her feel like a burden. Someone who had to be protected because they were too weak to contribute.

She would not hide from Naraku any more. If he wanted to find her so desperately to go to this extreme, she would seek him out. Nothing like the rats or the birds should be allowed to happen again. The time had come for her to confront Naraku directly. She looked forward to it. Hakudoshi was not a challenge to her. All of his petty schemes were not a threat to her.

Her attention was returned to the scene below by the sight of Inuyasha rushing to help his their efforts were in vain. None of them could destroy the barrier surrounding the shrine. Only she possessed that power. She can come to destroy the shrine not to save Inuyasha and his friends from the rats. The time had come to end this farce. so that she could return to her task of finding Naraku.

She fired her arrow. Inuyasha's friends would be saved. to fight another day. She had not fired the arrow for them or Inuyasha. It simply had to be done to stop Naraku. Although they were Inuyasha's friends, her crusade was more important than any life. If she had to she would sacrifice their lives, Inuyasha's life and her own life to achieve that end.

She might understand intellectually why friends would sacrifice their lives for each other, but she could not feel it in her heart. She had no friends for whom she was willing to risk her life. All she had left were her puppets, her soul collectors and her shikigami. None of them could remotely be classified as friends. No one to share her burden, her sorrows and her joys. All that remained was her mission.

After Inuyasha destroyed the shrine, the rats disappeared. The cat, the woman and the boy lay huddled together. Another minute and all that remained would have been skeletons. Friendship had been rewarded. The monk rushed to woman's side. The kitsune arrived carrying her reincarnation. , the person who had replaced her in Inuyasha's heart.

She felt a twinge of jealousy, but dismissed it. It was unworthy of her. Inuyasha continued to stare at her. Their eyes met for a moment. She finally turned to leave with her shikigami. There was no place for her here. She must get on with her mission. There was no time for Inuyasha, no time for friendship, no time for love. All these belonged to the mortal world of she was no longer a part. The sooner she completed her mission the sooner she could leave this world behind.

Still, it would be nice to have a friend.