present:

Rin had a small temp job filing papers in a small office even though Sesshomaru kept insisting on paying more than enough child support until him and Rin could work out their issues. He had been sober for two weeks before his therapist called and said talking to him would help his recovery immensely. She didnt understand but agreed to one session. Only one and she was done and filing for divorce.

Sesshomaru agreed and soon they set a date.

Later that week Rin was stumbling around her apartment putting on her shoes and mumbling to Kagome. "Promise theyll be safe? I'll only be gone a little..." Seriously she stared at Kagome who was bottle feeding Ran and making faces at Sunny.

"Yes we will be fine Rin. Go make things right with your husband!" If Kagome could she would have shoved Rin out the door but she couldnt because of Ran who looked up at her with his golden eyes that seemed to smile at her.

"Things won't be right again Kagome..." Rin covered her eyes with her bangs before turning and grabbing her purse before shutting the door behind her. Kagome rolled her eyes at how dramatic Rin could be sometimes. If only Kagome knew...

Rin shortly made it to the office of Sesshomarus therapist. She appreciated that he was trying to change. That for once he was sober and being proactive about their marriage. After she sat down in front of them, Rin crossed her legs.

"So?" Rin raised an eyebrow because they both stared at her with somber looks. Already Rin did not like where this was going.

past:

Rin and Sessomaru had been dating for half a year before he asked her to marry him. Excitedly Rin agreed. Why wouldnt she marry her perfect stranger?! She giggled with delight as he put the ring on her finger. It was beautiful and modest just like she would have liked it. "Oh Sesshomaru!" She put her arms around him and smothered him in kisses.

They were just sitting in Rins living room when he asked but he knew she wouldnt want something extravagant as a fancy restaurant and getting down in front of her on one knee. He was pleased with her happiness.

That night, like they had many nights before, they made love and passed out in each others arms. He didnt know how to explain that Rin was already pregnant and he didnt want to taint her name with only getting married because of that because Sesshomaru truely believed they were going to get married one day regardless of the circumstances.

Rin was only planning the wedding for a few weeks before the morning sickness kicked in. She would excuse herself and throw up wherever she was. She would've thought she was hungover if she knew Sesshomaru kept her from drinking lately.

"Kagome...I might be pregnant..." She wiped her mouth as she left the bathroom. Kagome widened her eyes then waved it off. "No I'm sure Sesshomaru would have told you by now if you were..." Kagome paused as Rin left the room to run back to the bathroom to dry heave. She didnt have anything in her stomach but still felt sick to her stomach. "Oh Rin..." Kagome stood behind her in Rins stall and rubbed her back. "Ask him later?" Rin nodded at her friend and flushed the toilet behind them.

It had only been a couple of hours since her and kagome left the shop where Rin threw up her insides. They were looking at wedding dresses but Rin decided to end it because if she was pregnant then maybe she would need to look at dresses closer to the wedding to match a baby bump.

Rin kissed Kagomes cheek in goodbye before she stomped to her apartment where Sesshomaru was waiting for her. "AM I PREGNANT?!" She screamed. Catching Sesshomaru off guard. His eyes widened for a second then he nodded at her. "A couple of weeks..." The hurt in Rins eyes that followed his answer made his heart sink. "Thats not why I asked Rin. I would have asked regardless..." He held one hand out to Rin hoping she would grab his back.

To his luck she did. His relief as he held her closer was more apparent to her than ever. "It will be fine Rin." He whispered into her ear before kissing her cheek. Rin nodded then put a hand to her stomach and staring downward. Her a mom? Was she ready for that? She knew Sesshomaru could afford it but if he left her one day she would probably need to get a low paying job just to support her and her child.

"When Kagura found out." Sesshomaru looked away. "And they did what they did..." Sesshomarus therapist looked at him concerned. Rin shook her head. "Shut up! I dealt with that alone! While you just kept drinking. Even after Ran and Sunny... You were drunk!"

Sesshomaru stopped moving and looked at her. "What do you mean?..." He could see Rins uneasyness. "You don't remember how they were conceived...you were too drunk after...after..."

Rin stood up from her chair. "Sign the damned divorce papers Sesshomaru!" In an instant Rin turned her heels and walked out of the room before her tears debilitated her from leaving.

Sesshomaru stood dumbfounded. His therapist sighed. "Both of you need to deal with stuff before this can be resolved..."

Break

Rin cried as she ran down the hallways to the elevator. Sesshomaru really didnt remember? Ran and Sunny were born out of guilt.

past.

Rin held onto her stomach feeling her baby kicking around happily. She smiled to herself while she snacked on grapes. It was all she craved. Normal or frozen didnt matter because it made her tummy feel warm either way. "They love them!"

Sesshomaru kissed her forehead and sat next to her. "Kagura wants to come over and feel the baby kick. She hasnt been to the bar in a while so you dont have to worry about that." Rin nodded at him and put a hand on her stomach. " You two have been friends longer than we have been together so I know shes happy for us! Maybe our baby can be her godchild" Rin looked to her fiance hopeful. Sesshomaru didnt want to mess with her emotions so he nodded.

He should have kept Kagura away from Rin.

He kept a close eye on their interactions. Her hand on Rins stomach and her telling her how lucky she was to be able to give the gift of life. Rin was naive and ignored the malice in her voice. "I'm excited to! I can't wait to see what motherhood is like."

Kagura gave her a look of disgust that neither him or Rin saw. So it was a surprise when Kagura put a poison in her glass of water. Naraku told her it would kill Rins child and make it so she wouldnt have children ever again. Naraku knew Kagura still had feelings for Sesshomaru so if this helped her love Naraku more he would make sure Rin could never have kids again.

It took only minutes after Rins first sip of water since being slipped the poison. "Se-Sesshomaru!" Rin fell over onto the carpet. Her forehead covered in sweat. Sesshomaru leaned down and held onto her. He looked for Kagura who seemed to have disappeared already. Behind she left a little vial that still had some liquid in it. He growled before calling someone who could come up with an antidote.

Within minutes his father and his friend Totosai were at Rins apartment. Inutaisho seemed annoyed. Inutaisho didnt recognize Rin because theyve never been introduced yet.

Rin I couldnt have known, Sesshomaru rationalized with himself. " I have to tell her!" He got up before being forced back down. "Let her grieve Sesshomaru... I think she needs that more than words from yourself..." Inutaisho looked at Sesshomaru betrayed. "Why didnt you tell me you had a mate?"Inutaisho ignored Sesshomaru and pulled out his cell phone. "Izayoi will talk to her okay?." He waited for his wife to answer. "I Need a favor darling..." He waited for a response. "Yes its about Sessomaru...Yes he has... Talk to her please?" He laughed at his wife that said what Sesshomaru couldnt make out. "Thank you."

"Appreciate this Son." Inutaisho closes his phone and walked away. "It could be your last chance..."

Sesshomaru didnt have words to say to his father while he walked away and just nodded. If it helped Rin go back to normal he didnt care. He missed his old wife... Not this shell he could have prevented.

Rin sat alone in her room holding her stomach. She was sniffling and sitting in the dark. She didnt want company at the moment but she knew Sesshomarus stepmom was sent by both of them to talk to her. So sucking up the annoyance she just smiled at Izayoi. "yes?"

Izayoi ignored her sarcasm. "You know hes concerned about you Rin..." She reached out a hand but was only rejected. "If he was we would still have a child Sesshomarus mom."

She giggled at Rin which caught her off guard. "I am not his mother. Just his step mom. I cant believe he hasnt told you dear..."

Rin shook her head at Izayoi. "I guess not..." She curled into herself and looked away from Izayoi.

"Have you ever?" Rin looked up to Izayoi with tears in her eyes. "Have you ever lost a child? Did you feel like a failure?" She started to tear up before she started to sob to herself. Izayoi shook her head and hugged Rin. " No my sweet child...Never had to feel that loss but I cant imagine what that feeling would be like..."

Rin started to cry harder and hugged Izayoi harder. "What did I do wrong?!" Rin started to cry hard into Izayois shoulder. " My baby is gone! He's gone!" Izayoi patted her back but didnt know what to say to Rin at the moment.

"I failed him..." Izayoi gasped...She was at a total loss for words. She knew that he heard her say those words. "Thats not true..."

He never got over the loss of their first child. He couldnt understand how Rin could get over it so fast. Even after their twins were born. It was His first. His heir to everything. His ex girlfriend killed him and somehow Rin got over it so easily when they conceived a second time.

"He was our child!" Sesshomaru yelled down the hall as Rin walked away. His therapist shushed him as if that would work. "Youll have to face it soon too!" He growled and shoved past his therapist. "I need to go!" His first thought was to go Home and drink a warm glass of scotch. What else did he have when his wife was trying to blame all of it on him? She just tried to act like nothing happened to her and he was overreacting. Sunny and Ran were a blessing but he still lost his first pup and was still grieving when Rin wouldnt even acknowledge it. If anything she was hindering this too.

Rin was sobbing in the waiting room when she saw Sesshomaru walk past her hurriedly. She could tell the look on his face. He was about to relapse.

"If you do it you will never see Ran and Sunny again!" She screamed through her tears. Hoping Sesshomaru would hear her but didnt really count on it because of how fast he was walking. He stopped anyway and looked at Rin incredulously. "You can't..."

She scoffed at him. "Try me Sesshomaru. Just frikin try me." She got up from her chair. " I agreed to this on the grounds that we would get divorced after this. I get sole custody and we can work out visitation days okay?"

Rin didnt look like she wanted to continue any of the conversation so he just nodded and tried to walk off. He knew he couldnt change that stubborn womans mind. He almost smirked before he realized it meant leaving his children behind.

After Rin noticed that Sesshomaru walked away, she took the chance to call Kagome.. "Sesshomarus gone..."She frowned. "It's just not going to work out anymore Kagome." Rin fell over and sobbed to herself. Feeling her heart break before she dropped her phone and held herself close."He wont ever get over what Kagura did..."

She could hear kagome struggle for words. but it would never be good enough.. "Why doesnt he love me enough?!" Rin yelled out loud but kagome could hear it through the phone. Rins sobs hurt her deep because she couldnt help it.

"Rin get up." It was Sesshomarus voice kagome heard on the other line. "LEAVE HER ALONE!" She yelled knowing he could hear her. " I SWEAR TO GOD SESSHOMARU."

The line clicked and kagome looked at the phone confused. In a rush She texted Inuyasha. "Im taking the twins out of the house... Sesshomarus lost it. Hes not safe for them or Rin."

Kagome scooped up Rins twins and went to load them into the car. Immediately they started to cry. Kagome was in over her head but knew she had to protect them like Rin made her promise. Sunny and Ran would miss both their mom and father but Kagome could not trust Sesshomaru right now.

"Rin get up". Sesshomaru looked down at his wife. She looked so hopeless in front of him that he wanted to just hold her up and kiss her sadness away but he knew he wasnt allowed that pleasure anymore.

"This wont work...This wont work..." She kept repeating to him. "I'm tired of fighting Sesshomaru." Her voice sounded broken inbetween her sniffling.