It Takes Time

By: Le tired

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or its characters, blah blah blah, etc.

Rated: T for some language and…stuff?

Author's Notes: Yay I surprised myself by being super productive and churning out a few chapters. Plus I got my first request by an agent for a partial for a novel I wrote over the summer, so that was sort of inspiring! Anyway, onto more fic-related things…after having a few goofy fun chapters, this one is largely serious and delves more into the romance aspect. It was a challenge because I guess this is where feelings become more explicit, and I wanted to convey the characters' struggle with opening themselves up without it becoming overly angsty. Here's hoping I succeeded at least somewhat.

kriitikko: Thank you as always for your support! I always think of my reviewers and that makes me work harder on my fics!

bandgirlz: Oh my gosh, you're being too generous to me! And I like your style! I think you just tend to write fics with a more dramatic spin, but that's good because there are so many aspects to romance and they should all be written about! I like to catch more of the funny, everyday sort of atmosphere in a romance, but sometimes I'm in the mood for emotional turmoil and that's when I read your stuff! Haha it's funny you think I don't overexplain, because I meant this fic to be highly introspective and more of a character study; I deliberately tried to explain what I thought might go through Hitsu and Matsu's heads in a romance. I actually thought you do a much better job of 'showing not telling'! Oh and nothing I do is instinctual haha, it'd be so nice if it was. I don't really think I'm in any place to tell you how to write, but if you're curious about my process, I just sit there and literally try to imagine the characters saying what I wrote. I think that might be the reason I seem to do the 'say less and mean more' thing, because both Hitsugaya and Matsumoto strike me as that sort of character, so I end up writing like that to fit their personalities. If it was someone who was more open and loud-mouthed, I'd likely write more obvious dialogue. Well, hope that made some sense and that you continue enjoying the story! :)

templar627: Thanks for reviewing! Here indeed is the next installment!

sagitgirlth: Haha I guess it was a false alarm, and I have managed to put together a few more chapters! Thanks as always for reading and reviewing!

Prince of Winter Dragons: Sorry, I probably shouldn't have been so quick to say there weren't going to be any updates soon. I just felt bad because the last few times I dropped off the face of the earth I didn't give any warning. But now it's like I cried wolf :P. I'm glad you liked the reunion part, I love imagining that scene. Maybe someday Kubo Tite will actually draw it!

Writing bunny: Haha that's a good point about Yachiru biting, I hadn't thought of that! Hmm I think I might try to integrate that into the story later… :D

KhempriIrisi: Oh yay a new reader! That's exciting! Thank you and I hope you continue to enjoy the story!

Chapter 13

It was the early afternoon now, a quarter past two. Only a little more than four hours before the date. Matsumoto smiled to herself, then yawned from where she lay stretched out on the couch. She'd managed a whole two hours of work today, a truly herculean feat as far as she was concerned, and now was settling in for a brief beauty rest. She'd sleep for an hour or so, and then head back home to spruce up. She tried to imagine Hitsugaya at her doorstep, ready to escort her. Would he bring flowers? Chocolates? Oooh, what would he wear?

Actually that was a really good question. Matsumoto popped up to a sitting position. "Nee, taichou, what are you wearing tonight? I told you no captain's uniform, remember? That would be completely un-acc-ept-able." She punctuated each syllable of the last word with a midair finger jab in her captain's direction.

Hitsugaya scowled at her over the steaming cup of tea he was sipping. Since Matsumoto had behaved herself somewhat today, he'd had a bit more time to himself to relax. "I remember. I'll just wear a regular shihakusho."

She knew it. He'd been far too compliant when she made her request. "Ehhh? Taichou, that's no good! I'm getting all dressed up, you can't look drabby when you're out with me!"

"Drabby?" Hitsugaya's eye twitched. "Unlike you, Matsumoto, I have more on my mind than clothing and jewelry."

"But taichouu, I was hoping to see you in something really dashing. Like a western suit!"

"Who on earth is going to wear western clothing in the middle of Seireitei? I'd look completely ridiculous!"

"Nonsense, taichou! You'd look so handsome all the girls on the streets would go green with envy seeing me with you!" Matsumoto sighed dreamily as the scene played out in her head.

Hitsugaya snorted and downed the rest of his tea in one irritated gulp. "Are you drunk again? Who'd be jealous of you walking around with a brat?"

Matsumoto was surprised. "Taichou…you're not a brat. And I always thought you hated being called that."

"I do. But that doesn't change how others see me. And when they look at me, they see a brat." Hitsugaya lowered his eyes and his eyebrows pinched together. To all but the most introspective observer, it would seem he was simply deep in concerned thought. But Matsumoto had been his lieutenant for decades now, and she knew it meant something else entirely: her captain was doubting himself. "You and I both know there are more suitable men than me for this."

Hitsugaya was very straightforward. He was rarely conflicted about what course of action to pursue, because he followed a consistent moral compass and knew what mattered most to him. In that sense, he was actually a lot like Zaraki, who just wanted to one thing (fight fight fight kill kill kill), and the rest of the world be damned. Neither experienced much hesitation or regret after they acted and if you gave them the chance to do it all over again, they'd likely not change a thing. Being one of the youngest and newest captains hadn't stopped Hitsugaya from investigating and going against the Central 46 decree for Kuchiki Rukia's execution, while the other captains expressed their unease but ultimately followed orders. That took courage and conviction—to question what should be absolute.

No, Matsumoto didn't think Hitsugaya ever truly regretted any of his actions. But that didn't keep him for questioning if he could have done better, been better somehow. He didn't hold back when it came to judging himself, and when he felt he wasn't quite up to snuff, he was perfectly capable of punishing himself, mercilessly mentally replaying his mistakes. Undoubtedly, the number one box office hit at the Hitsugaya Mind Theatre as of late was 'How I Couldn't Prevent Hinamori's Near-Death by Aizen', but 'How I Hate My Looks' was finally making a showing as well. Sheer nonsense to Matsumoto, since Hitsugaya had absolutely no control over his appearance or growth. Naturally, that didn't stop him from subconsciously rebuking himself.

Well, enough was enough. Matsumoto had never liked the situation—how deeply Hitsugaya would bury himself in his thoughts and guilt so she couldn't reach him, much less pull him out as she yearned to. Now that she felt the way she did for him, she was determined to put a stop to it. She was an optimist and believed the best in people. Sure, everyone had flaws, but what was often forgotten was that everyone had their good points and worth as a person too, and deserved to know them. Especially the man she loved.

"Taichou! You stop that, you hear me!" She said it so sternly Hitsguya actually did come out of his brooding to stare up at her, bewildered. "I won't have you getting all depressed over this!"

"Who's getting depressed? I was just—"

"I know. You were just being matter-of-fact about how people judge your height and coloring. But even that's not allowed!" Matsumoto stamped her foot, making Hitsugaya jump slightly. "You're already too hard on yourself over far too many things, taichou. I won't have you thinking badly of your looks as well! And don't even start to dismiss me," she warned dangerously as she saw him open his mouth in protest, "Don't pretend like nothing's bothering you and take everything on all by yourself. I'm your lieutenant, I'm meant to support you."

Matsumoto calmed herself down a little and spoke more softly. "Taichou, I know…I can't offer you much comfort when it comes to some of the difficult decisions you have to make as a captain. But this…we're in this together. You have to tell me when something's wrong. Don't try to shield or protect me. I know it's because you think you have no right to trouble someone else with your problems, and your self-reliance is one of the reasons I admire you, but it's all right to be vulnerable around me. I want to know you, all of you! I want to share your happiness, and I want to share your sorrow!"

When she finished exclaiming, Hitsugaya was openly gaping at her, and Matsumoto flushed. She didn't usually speak so directly from the heart, with so little affectation—at least, not without some serious alcohol in her system to encourage her. But there would be no more obfuscation on this matter. She cleared her throat and forged on, ignoring her discomfiture. "Do I make myself clear, taichou?"

"…uh, yes." Matsumoto smiled as she noticed her captain's ears had turned red. So she wasn't the only one fighting down a blush. "Sorry, I guess I have a tendency to keep my thoughts to myself. I…never really had anyone to share them with. But I apologize, Matsumoto, for upsetting you with my actions."

Matsumoto waved away Hitsugaya's apology. "Forget it, taichou, I'm not really that upset. It's just been bothering me for a long time, and it was high time I got it off my chest. Really, it's unhealthy how you dwell over every insignificant little thing. Just look at how you micro-manage our division. You shouldn't do everything yourself!"

"Oh, and I suppose I should just leave everything to you?" Hitsugaya's arched eyebrow spoke volumes.

"Aahaha, well…no, not quite!" Matsumoto nervously laughed. "But, ah, you know what I mean, taichou!" Sensing she'd lost ground with that last argument, her mind quickly flickered to another topic. "Hey taichou, wasn't that like our first fight? Ahh that's so cute! That's a real relationship landmark, you know! Although I wasn't expecting it until after a few more dates…"

"What?" Hitsugaya blinked, trying to keep up with the rapidity of her thoughts. "What…that…that wasn't a fight!"

"Sure it was, taichou! I yelled at you, you apologized, and then we made up." Matsumoto nodded approvingly. "Mm-hmm, it's good you already know to just bow your head and apologize. Remember taichou, the woman is always right. As a man, your role during an argument is to try and placate her. A sincere apology is pretty good but depending on circumstances, you might need to buy her a small present too."

Hitsugaya stared at her, disbelieving, for a few minutes, before he finally managed to say, "I pity any man who had the misfortune to be in a relationship with you."

"It's the truth, taichou! Ask Kyoraku-taichou. He'll tell you. He's totally whipped by Nanao-chan."

"I'm not discussing the private matters of other divisions. It's disrespectful. Plus Kyoraku is hardly my idea of someone to set examples by." Hitsugaya rolled his eyes, then sighed and ran his hand through his hair several times, mussing it up adorably. "Seriously, Matsumoto, I can't understand it. Wouldn't you prefer someone…older looking?"

"Well of course, taichou," Matsumoto replied simply. She'd had a lot more time than Hitsugaya to think over all the implications. "But older-looking is different from preferring someone just older. I know we sound creepy together at first, but despite appearances, you're not a child. You just look like one. That will change in time. When Kyoraku-taichou first met Nanao, she was still a young girl too."

"Again, let's not go by what Kyoraku does." Hitsugaya squeezed his eyes shut tiredly and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I understand what you're saying, Matsumoto, but there's still the matter of…physical attraction."

Now Matsumoto was lost. "What about it?" Physical attraction wasn't a problem, as far as she knew. Unless he was saying he wasn't physically attracted to her. But he said I was pretty! Aaah was he lying back then?

"…there needs to be both emotional and physical attraction." Hitsugaya spoke slowly, like he could hardly believe what he was discussing. "To say you feel both for me…"

Matsumoto smiled. Oh. Her taichou was so dense sometimes. "Taichou!" She shook her head, amused and exasperated at the same time, and hopped up on his desk. Hitsugaya made a face and quickly shuffled his papers for protection away from her to the other side. "Honestly! Do you think I'd be going out with you if I didn't think you were handsome? I mean, something has to make up for your stiff personality and complete inability to make a girl feel good!"

"…Oi, are you actually trying to reassure me?"

Matsumoto went on. "You say you know what people see when they look at you. Well, do you know what I see?" She reached over and lightly tapped Hitsugaya's eyes. "I see…beautiful eyes the color of a stormy sea that always seek the truth."

From there, she traced her finger lightly along the edge of his face. "Sharp masculine cheeks that have lost their baby fat and matured since I first saw them so many years ago."

She ran her finger to the bottom of his chin. "There's a strong fierce jaw to match the stubbornness of its owner…"

Then she turned her wrist to rub his lips with her thumb. "…and a proud expressive mouth that's too serious all the time, but when it smiles, it's as bright as the morning dew."

Her other hand had unconsciously tangled itself in Hitsugaya's unruly hair and toyed with one silvery soft lock. "And hair the color of a snow-capped mountain under the moonlight. Taichou," she finished softly, looking unflinchingly into Hitsugaya's eyes, "Don't listen to anyone else. I am really and truly attracted to you."

They must have both been holding their breaths, because when they exhaled in unison, it was like an explosion in the still room. The only other sounds were of birds chirping and the slight rushing of trees in the wind from outside. All of a sudden, Matsumoto realized exactly how close she was leaning into Hitsugaya. She had sort of fallen into a wondrous daze herself slowly feeling and exploring her captain, greedily soaking in the contact of his skin. His breath was warm against her cheek and smelled slightly sweet of the green tea he'd drank.

There was a moment that seemed to stretch between them. Matsumoto felt a light tickling sensation to one side of the face and realized distantly that Hitsugaya had reached up with one hand to thread his fingers through her hair and brush against the back of her neck, guiding her head down towards him.

Thump. Thump. Thump..thump..thumpthumpthump… Matsumoto's heart slowly picked up its pace until it was hammering against her chest, pulsating like hummingbird wings in mid-flight. Looking into Hitsugaya's eyes, she saw his expression was abstract and wondering, like he couldn't entirely fathom what they were doing. Matsumoto thought she knew how he felt. Her body seemed afire and with a mind of its own. Her vision came in and out of focus before she finally let her eyes close. She shivered as she felt Hitsugaya's other hand trace up from the sensitive skin of her inner wrist to her forearm, then slid underneath the loose sleeve of her kosode and pushed up, causing the soft fabric to rise and whisper further against her arm as his strong fingers finally came to rest on her shoulder. It felt good there, like it was where it belonged all along.

Oh. My. God. I think…we're about to kiss. It wasn't like the other times Matsumoto had been kissed. She'd always seen it coming, been prepared to play lusty seductress. Hot pleasure and mindless grabbing was what she had in mind—not this almost shy, confused, yet deeply intimate discovery of one another. She felt wildly out of control. As if she were in freefall, with the world rushing past her so quickly it took the breath out of her lungs. And through his touches where their bodies connected, Hitsugaya was telling her he was experiencing the same breathless exhilaration, the same unsurety. Guided by pure sensation and instinct, they were powerless to stop it.

Still unseeing, Matsumoto felt her captain's mouth fall on hers. His lips ghosted over hers before pressing more firmly. Lightning shot through her and the uncertainty she'd felt dropped away. Hungrily, Matsumoto parted her mouth, encouraging, almost pleading for him to go deeper. She might have whimpered a little. Yes, this was what she'd wanted, had dreamed of for the past several months. She clutched at the fabric of Hitsugaya's long sleeves, aching for him to hold more of her. He hesitated and even seemed to be thinking about pulling away. Matsumoto didn't want to come off pushy or grabby but…the hell with it.

She threw her arms around Hitsugaya's neck, yanking him even closer, and thrust her tongue into his mouth. Hitsugaya jerked and went, "Mmfph!", which absurdly reminded her of the first time she'd pushed his face into her breasts. Luckily this time, however, he didn't proceed to push her away and yell at her. After a few moments, Matsumoto felt his mouth move and the tip of his tongue stroked the bottom of hers. YES!, inner Matsumoto crowed. Finally, some action!

And then Hitsugaya broke the kiss.

It was so abrupt Matsumoto almost fell off his desk on which she had been precariously perched, but luckily he hadn't completely released her and was able to catch and brace her until she regained her balance.

"Taichou, what—?" Matsumoto stopped and followed Hitsugaya's concentrated gaze to the right. In the air, a shimmering black butterfly was making its way towards them. A jigokuchou.

Hitsugaya reached out with one hand and the hell butterfly alighted on it. There was a brief silence as the message was relayed, then the butterfly took flight again and in a few moments was gone from the room. Matsumoto watched her captain's face. Whatever the message, it had been important.

"Taichou, has something happened?"

"I'm afraid so." Hitsugaya looked grim. "Arrancars have appeared in the human world."