Author's Note: Firstly I just want to send big virtual hugs to all of the people who sent me nice little messages about my university rejection. They all made me smile like a goof, ha-ha. I've got other offers though, so it's not the end of the world that one didn't want me. Just have to sort all the big scary accommodation and student loans and stuff now, wjhfjsdhfjsdhfjsdf. Welp!

Just a quick note now – I'm going to be away next Wednesday and Thursday on a trip to London with my college, so I won't be online to update for those two days. I know it's quite a way away, but I wanted to let you all know while I'm thinking of it! I'll probably update on the Tuesday night before I leave, but they'll be no updates until Friday when I get back or Saturday~.

Enough of my ramblings now though – time to get on with today's update! I hope you all enjoy this one too. Izaya and Namie's conversations are so fun to write~.

"Ah, you always greet me with such a dazzling smile, Namie-chan!" Izaya Orihara cooed at the stony faced woman seated at her desk, tucked away in a little corner of his Shinjuku home and office.

He himself had just slipped in through the front door, still wearing his twisted little smirk despite the tufts of inky hair sticking up rebelliously and the handful of crinkles on his shirt which normally would have bothered him. Namie, for the most part, ignored the little quip, merely raising her eyes from the paperwork she had been browsing in order to shoot a sceptical look the informant's way. Izaya didn't seem to mind though, practically skipping across the room to shrug his jacket off to rest on the back of his desk chair.

"You must have been out early, you certainly weren't here when I arrived," Namie commented after a while, having since returned her attention to the work in front of her, no longer paying attention to what Izaya was doing. Her tone was chiefly apathetic, much like the rest of her, but it was hard to miss the tinge of sarcasm, that little joking lilt that came with the words she spoke. "Do you even sleep anymore?"

Izaya laughed at that, remaining stood behind the chair, his fingers running through the fur trim of his jacket almost affectionately. The little strands were starting to get a little dirty, just like the jacket's former owner, and the raven made a little mental note to get it cleaned soon. Namie would take care of that for him. He might not go as far as saying that he loved the item of clothing, but it certainly was dear to him; or as dear as a silly little jacket that had once belonged to his first lover could really be. It was almost funny he still had it when he thought about it. Hadn't he said so many times that he didn't care for the man, for the past and the him he had used to be back then? And yet here he was, keeping it lingering around him, warming him in the coldest of times. Maybe he liked the ironic, or maybe he was just a masochistic fool after all.

"Is that concern I hear in your voice?" he retorted, all hint of seriousness lost from his own voice. Namie snorted in reply, a quiet scoff slipping past her lips. Izaya half chuckled at that, sighing contently as if this was the most at peace he had ever felt. "No, I didn't think it was,"

"But if Namie-chan really must know, I haven't been here since yesterday evening," he continued with a lazy shrug of one shoulder, more out of habit than anything considering that Namie still wasn't looking. He let the fur slide between his fingers for the last time, removing them from between the dimming tufts and stepping back from the chair altogether. He still needed that bath, needed to clean himself since he'd not really done so since his last little tryst with Shizuo, something that bothered him to no end. He'd always prided himself on cleanliness, always made it an important part of his day to day living, washing and cleaning and weighing himself after each bath; just another way to keep himself in control.

"Out harassing some unfortunate soul again were we?" Namie cut in with another scoff, glancing up briefly to watch as he made his way across the loft towards the bathroom. Even he walk was teasing, a little skip, a little swagger that oozed with self-confidence that had rocketed along with his ego, all the way to his head.

"Why would I ever do such a thing? Oh, your words wound me Namie," Izaya replied, bringing one hand flying up to his chest in mock hurt, only stopping for a second or so on his path across the room. He could practically feel the warm water lapping at his skin already, and was in no way going to put that off any longer than he needed to.

"Actually, I was having a tea party with the yellow scarves, they make for much better company than you do," he quipped, shooting a little smirk her way as he disappeared into the bathroom, closing the door and flicking the lock behind him.

The bathroom was light, much like the rest of the loft, and it was always kept clean, just the way Izaya liked it. Everything was tucked neatly out of the way in the bathroom cabinet, shampoo and the like, neat and tidy just as it ought to be. Shizuo's had been hell compared to this when Izaya had stepped foot into it that morning, with bottles of shaving cream and special shampoo and whatnot littered around the place. Izaya had not really expected any different from the blonde, but had made note to either hire the oaf a maid or give him lessons on proper bathroom protocol.

The raven wasted no time once he was inside and the door shut behind him, stepping forward to turn on the water, allowing the bathtub to start to fill. He perched on the edge while it did so, stirring his fingers in little circles just beneath the surface. It didn't take long for the thing to fill, and when it had Izaya stood to turn off the water, peeling away the crinkled clothes and stepping in. It was blissful when he sunk into the bath, the heat enveloping his aching muscles with a delightful tingling of his skin; already he felt a hundred times cleaner than he had done just minutes before.

Bath time was always something that calmed the frenzy of Izaya's mind; it washed away not only what may have gathered on his body but also the problems which settled in his mind. It was this time that allowed him to think the clearest. He always supposed it was similar to a smoker finally getting that fix they'd been craving, because he'd always noted that was when they were the most intelligent and had the clearest head; though they were hardly much smarter then, because anyone who sucked those toxins into their body was, in his opinion, an idiot. Shizuo Heiwajima was no exception, but then Izaya supposed he had always considered Shizuo a bit of an idiot, even before he'd taken up the nasty habit so maybe it didn't really matter after all.

The raven's mind fell to the blonde then, his head lowering to rest against the edge of the bath. He raised one foot briefly from the water, idly watching the droplets race down the skin of his leg as he pondered on the monster, their situation and the whole concept of love itself.

Shizuo Heiwajima had always thought he understood the whole damn concept of love, and he had never thought that it was possible to love and hate someone at the same time either;but then Izaya Orihara had coming crashing into that side of his life with a fake name and a box of sushi hand delivered to his apartment, and Shizuo had started to wonder just how much he understood after all.

He'd stopped trying to deny the fact that he had slept with the man he was meant to hate, it had happened too many times for him to pretend they just hadn't done so now. After the talk he'd had with Tom, he guessed he could deal with Tom knowing that they'd done that as well. But that didn't mean dealing with his feelings was as easy as that. The solution to those wouldn't come nearly as simply, much to his annoyance. There was something there, he knew that he guessed, but it didn't mean he was really ready to accept that or even that he understood what it was. Was it love? Everything said that it should be, and yet it didn't feel like that was right to Shizuo, it didn't feel like it was that easy to define, to explain. It sounded too clear a label for this thing between him and the louse, too clean. Their relationship, love or hate or whatever, it wasn't simple, it never had been, and he guessed it never would be.

He had found his way back to Tom's apartment after they'd eaten at his friend's new restaurant; the brunette had invited him to watch the big fight on his new TV rather than skulk home alone. Shizuo still hadn't shaken away all the embarrassment of being discovered, but he hadn't declined Tom's offer all the same. He was sat on the sofa at the minute, Tom having headed out to get the take-out food they'd decided to get for later, rather than cooking something up. His phone lay sat out on the cushion beside him, and every now and then Shizuo couldn't help but glance at it, internally fighting with himself whether to pick it up and call a raven in Shinjuku. Maybe he—

Shizuo didn't know all that much about Izaya if he really thought about it. He knew that he had twin sisters that he didn't get on with or particularly like, he knew that he liked sushi and needed a damn good meal or five from what he'd seen from those slim hips. His knowledge didn't extend much further than that. Nakura had said a little more, but that still hadn't told Shizuo much about Izaya either. He'd mentioned a bad relationship when he'd been young; one that Shizuo knew vaguely involved Shiki, but not the details of that. He'd mentioned a rough relationship with his parents, which had surprised Shizuo since he'd always just assumed that Izaya'd had things easy in that respect. He'd mentioned numerous men that had flitted in and out of his life, but that hadn't told Shizuo much either other than that Izaya was a hell of a lot more experienced than he was in that respect.

Izaya knew everything about Shizuo though. Everything. The blonde would even bet that if asked the raven would be able to tell him what kind of toothpaste he used or the number of hairs on his head.

Shizuo didn't think lovers were supposed to be unequal like that. He supposed that if this was love, then he was meant to get to know Izaya, to find out the details to things Nakura had only alluded to, teased him with. Wasn't that what couples did? Chatted on the phone, talked, went out for meals and got to know each other or whatever? Shizuo half scoffed, half laughed to himself at the idea of him and Izaya doing that, and yet he couldn't stop himself glancing at his phone, couldn't stop himself thinking that's what was supposed to happen next.

"Damn flea," Shizuo muttered, fingers reaching out for the object at his side. "Damn, damn, damn,"

Which was ridiculous, one part of his mind reasoned - the sane part he supposed, because Izaya and he weren't a couple. They weren't, at least not as far as he was aware yet. They'd just fucked, spent the night together, and learnt that maybe they could get along without violently destroying everything around them. That didn't mean that they were dating, that didn't even mean that they were lovers, and yet—

Shizuo didn't have to wait long for someone on the other end of the phone to pick up.

"Hey, d'you, uh— wanna get— something to… eat?"