Author's Note: This is dumb. Like really...it's so dumb.

Day One-Hundred Thirteen: Catch Me by Demi Lovato

I'd known for a long time that I'd rather fall than fall in love.

Relationships lead to love. Relationships lead to goodbyes. Goodbyes and love lead to heartbreak. I just couldn't handle being broken-hearted.

So blindly, stupidly, and idly, I just naturally had to become involved in a relationship.

And yes, I liked him, but I had to be too careful not to do anything more than like him; I couldn't fall in love with him.

So I would kiss him. I would hold his hand. I would do things to make me feel physically fulfilled, but I couldn't open up emotionally. That led to falling in love, too.

Still, I couldn't help that feeling his kisses gave me. It seemed to stir something inside me.

I think a part of me, even though I had such a strong philosophy against love, knew that I'd end up falling anyway and I'd end up hurt in the end. Because he would say goodbye, in one way or another. And, despite their name, goodbyes were never good, nor were they painless.

"It's a beautiful night tonight," I commented as we had walked along the beach. It was September, which meant that tourists had already packed up and gone for the summer. It was pretty much empty. The moon was out and glistened along the fairly serene water.

We made our way down to the edge of the shore. I stood so close to the water that the now dark-blue water lapped up against my toes.

The sight was hypnotizing.

I realized when I turned his way that his face was hypnotizing. I felt the future passing us by, and…I didn't care.

He smiled at me and pulled me closer to him. I felt my heart stop for a split second before his lips were on mine. It was sweet. It was slow.

I could feel myself falling and I hated it with a passion.

I was singing in the shower. I was smiling when I went to sleep for no goddamn reason. I found myself thinking about him at random times of day.

This was starting to go too far, and I knew it. I couldn't let him catch me. I couldn't fall into his arms. This was coming undone quickly, but…I had to stop it.

I couldn't be left heartbroken.

My stomach was doing somersaults as I waited to meet him, once again on the beach near my house. In retrospect, that was likely a terrible idea, as it was just as romantic as it was a week prior. As someone terrified of love in general, this was a very bad idea.

I heard footsteps approaching me and I looked up anxiously.

I felt it was getting harder to breathe.

"What's wrong, Spencer? It sounded like you were upset on the phone," he said with concern as he sat next to me.

I bit my lip. He was a good guy. "I'm sorry. I just…I had…I can't be with someone," I said cryptically.

He was quiet for a moment. "What do you mean? We've been—"

"No, no. I meant, I can't be with someone….emotionally. I'm…" My voice clipped off.

"What are you scared of?" His voice was sincere. He genuinely cared.

"Falling. Getting my heart broken," I answered uneasily.

He said, "I'd never break your heart on purpose."

"But you could by accident and…I don't know if I could survive heart break. I don't want to. I don't know if I want to open up my heart. I don't think I could ever let someone in. I don't think I could ever be truthful with a guy," I mumbled. I was ashamed of it. I wasn't proud of those thoughts.

"But you just did."

For a moment, I wanted to deny that. But after a second glance, I realized that he was right. For what felt like the first time in forever, I was honest to someone else about how I was feeling.

What was this feeling? I feared it was love. I wasn't sure and I was scared to find out.

"This is love," he announced, confirming my worst fear. "And whether or not you want to admit to it, you're falling for me, just like I'm falling for you."

I hung my head. I had no idea how to respond. I didn't want to break. But I didn't know how much longer I could deny or resist these feelings without cutting him out altogether.

"Love is taking that risk, Spencer. And I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you. I don't know if you're in love with me, but…I guess we'll never know what we could be until you decide to trust me, wholeheartedly."

Wholeheartedly. She trusted him wholeheartedly.

This episode of Criminal Minds is so creepy...

Sarah:Thank yewww :) I'd insert a gif of Troian right here, but I can't. Good night :)

AL3110: Such a sweet song. I love it. Yeah, alright, but that still sucks. And I would've gotten Ultraviolence on CD, except for the fact that it curses a lot and like nobody here uses CDs/CD players and I'd have nowhere to play it. If I drove and had my own car, I'd have all my Marina and Lana in physical copy, but I don't have that :(

LittleBittyAbby: I don't know how to feel about PLL lately. I hated the first episode (it wasn't bad, but there was certainly WAY too much hype around it, so it kind of fell flat for me), I really liked the second episode, and the third episode...I don't even remember what happened in the third episode, it was so plain for me. Well, glad you're back and I'm glad you liked it!

tobyequalshottness:EXACTLY! And I just love the entire dynamic of their relationship. While in some aspects, I feel like Spencer is very alpha at times and Toby is a bit more submissive and humbled, in certain aspects, I guess, Toby is a bit more hot-tempered than Spencer (and it's usually with things involving her/his family), which is pretty interesting. I think he's definitely her rock while she's a bit more careless.

Did you know that apparently Minin is gay? Keegan's cat, Minin, for those of you who don't know. IDK, I guess I just never really thought of cats (or dogs or most animals, for that matter) as being idk sexual creatures, so I never really thought about it. But whatever. Good for Minin. And good for Keegan for accepting it and supporting him. I guess. I've never really heard about people persecuting a cat for being gay, but I guess it could happen, right?

And I'm going to go play Andoku on my bestie Michie's phone. The next one-shot is going to be Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye and Kimbra and it sucks just as much as this one. Maybe more. -Kayson