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NEVER LET ME GO

Chapter 3: BREAKEVEN

PERCY

I stared across my table and gazed outside the restaurant, waiting for Nico to arrive.

Mr. Lynn, being the sensitive and kind boss that he was, sensed that there was something bothering me and let me out for the day. He claimed that there wasn't much to do at the office so I wouldn't be needed anyway. I had called Nico, knowing that he didn't have any class during Wednesdays. I would've called Reyna, but I knew she was busy during these days. Besides, I needed some guy time.

The door opened and in came was my cousin. He was, as usual, wearing his aviator jacket, black printed shirt, dark jeans, and the skull ring he inherited from his father, who was named Hades, and was also my Dad's brother, along with Zeus Grace, Thalia's father. My Dad was named Poseidon. You could tell that my grandfather was crazy about Greek mythology. I suffered along with the names; I inherited the name Perseus. Lucky for Nico and Thalia, their Moms won the argument and was named with decent name – not that there was something wrong with mine, as Mom also agreed to it. Yes, Nico, Thalia and I were cousins. Our fathers were brothers.

Zeus Grace was a strict man, who was big on following rules, which wasn't a surprise as he was the president of Olympian Group of Companies – grandfather's line of companies. It was quite a surprise that Thalia emerged as some sort of a rebel. Her younger brother Jason, inherited their father's genes.

Hades di Angelo was a quiet and broody kind of man. He was the kind of person you would steer clear off if you happen to pass him in a dark alley. He had a dark personality and of the three brothers, he was the dark sheep. Personally, I didn't think so. I think he was just misunderstood.

My father, Poseidon Jackson was an easy-going guy. He usually spends his time in the beach, where he was managing a resort. He might be projecting power and elegance, but the twinkle in his eyes said otherwise. He was a passionate man, but also incredibly moody – something I think I got. He and my Mom separated when they realized that they weren't exactly compatible and were always at each others' throats. The last time I talked to him was during my twentieth birthday, which was two years ago.

Why the three brothers didn't share the same family name, I had no idea.

Anyway, Nico made his way to where I was seated and sat down in the seat in front of me. He raised his eyebrows at me, gesturing for me to talk. I didn't tell him anything over the phone. I took a deep breath and, in a voice barely above a whisper, said, "Annabeth's back." And of course I had to tell him what happened back at the coffee shop, how I yelled at Annabeth and how I prevented her from reaching Noah.

I watched his face for any sign of shock, or panic, or anything. But there wasn't any. Nico was good at hiding his emotions. "And what do you think?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I honestly don't know," I said.

"How do you feel?"

"Mad – "

"Obviously," he said, cutting me off.

"But at the same time, I'm scared," I admitted. "I'm scared for my son. I don't know what her reappearance is going to do to him. He has lived his entire life without a mother figure by his side and I don't know how he's going to react to this. I have no idea how Noah's going to take this blow, but I'll absorb it for him." I drank from the bottle of soda in front of me. "I just want what's best for Noah, you know? After all these years life has been tough for him and I don't want him to get hurt; he has been through so much and he's only five."

Nico was silent for a moment. Just when I thought that he wasn't going to say anything, he said, "Are you really mad for Noah or for yourself?"

I looked at him, frowning. "What exactly do you mean by that?"

He exhaled and held out his hands in a placating gesture. "Look Perce, I know that you only want what's best for Noah and you're worrying about how Annabeth's return is going to affect him, but I'm afraid you're letting your own personal issues with her get in the way of your decision."

"No," I disagreed quickly. "What I did was for my son. She disappeared in his life for some selfish reason and I have no intentions in letting her selfishness hurt my son. She has done enough in the past and I'm not letting her do the same thing again."

"Perce, you know what I really meant," he said, giving me a long, hard look. Nico was very much like his father. He had this ability to make people want to divulge their secrets just by looking them in the eye. "I think that after all these years, you still haven't moved on from Annabeth."

"I have moved on, Nico! I've had enough reasons that one single night that she disappeared from my son's life. I'll admit that it was nearly impossible at first and it hurt so much but having Noah was, and still is, my rock – he made moving on easy and he gave me a new perspective in life. He gave me reason to continue living and fighting and there's no way I'm going to let Annabeth ruin him."

"I don't mean to state the obvious but Noah is growing up; sooner or later he's going to ask about his Mom and you know, deep down, that he's going to need a mother figure – "

"That's what Reyna is," I pointed.

"Noah needs his mother, Perce. No matter what you do, no matter how angry you are, Annabeth is Noah's mother. She's a part of him, whether you like it or not. Her blood flows in his veins. No matter what you do to try and stop her from being a part of Noah's life, I'm sorry to say but she already is."

"That's why I'm stopping it, Nico!"

"Should it be stopped, Perce? You of all people should know how hard it is growing up with only one parent. Your Dad was barely around while you were growing up and I think you're projecting what you experienced into your son – "

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Nico knew how I grew up, having Mom take care of me. My Dad was an absentee and spent most of his time at his work, only sending child support check once a month. This lack of time was one of the reasons why Mom decided to separate with him. I have to admit, in the beginning I didn't mind his absence but when I was growing up, I started to feel empty. I started to crave his attention. I could remember how many times I got myself in trouble just so he'd pay me a visit.

Would my son go through something like that? No. I wouldn't let it.

I stood up, knocking the chair over, my body shaking with anger. "Don't you dare say that," I said, pointing a finger at him. "My childhood had been hard, yes, and that is the reason why I don't want the same thing to happen to my son. I will never, ever hurt her on purpose, Nico. How can you even think that?!"'

Nico exhaled. "Alright, I'm sorry," he said softly. "That came out wrong. But I'm standing by what I said earlier. Sooner or later you'll have to face Annabeth and let Noah know that she's his mother."

I sighed and sat down. It was kind of hard to stay mad at someone when he's the one you can talk to and the one who's likely to understand you. I sat back down and took another gulp from my soda. I saw Nico eyeing my drink and I shrugged. "I have a son, Nico. I have to set a good example for him." I set my soda down and sat back up. "And to answer your question, I have no intention of telling him."

Nico gave an exasperated breath. "Perce, you can't keep the truth from Noah. He deserves to know the truth. This whole centers on him and you know inside that thick skull of yours that you can't keep on avoiding the inevitable. You'll have to tell him the truth. You owe that much to your son."

I didn't answer, instead I gaze outside. People walking on the streets were starting to thicken. I checked my watch and saw that it was almost time for me to pick Noah up. Reyna had dropped my car near my office so I had it with me. I stood up. "I have to go," I told Nico. "Thank you for listening and sorry for yelling at you." He shrugged. "You still up for Friday?" Nico nodded.

Every Friday, Noah and I would go to the mall. I'd check out of work earlier and pick him up at school, then we'd spend the afternoon strolling. We'd be home right before dinner. We'd have his favorite foods and then we'd have a movie night. Noah called it Daddy and Noah's time. It was our way of catching up with each other after a whole busy week. But I have a meeting this Friday. Mr. Lynn claimed that some of his personnel had found a new species of fish in the Atlantic Ocean. We'd be discussing on what to do best. Most likely, the meeting would last until after dinner, which meant I wouldn't be able to take Noah to the mall. I asked Nico if he could and he agreed.

"Of course," Nico confirmed.

"Thank you," I said, picking up my duffel bag. "I'll see you."

"Yeah."

I went out of the restaurant and jumped in my car.

I looked over the dashboard and searched for Noah in the midst of kindergartens.

I spotted him coming out of the doorway, looking around for me. I stepped out of the car and waved at him. He gave me a grin as he ran up to me. "Daddy, look!" he said, holding up his arm proudly. Branded on his skin were four stars. "My teacher gave me stars!"

"That's great, buddy," I said, ruffling his hair. I opened the door for him and he jumped in. "We'll have pizza for that."

He pumped his fist in the air. "Yay! I say pepperoni and Hawaiian!"

"As you wish, my prince," I said, giving a small bow. Noah giggled as he closed his door. I circled the car. I was about to jump in when a hand grabbed me and turned me around. I looked up to check who it was and a spark of anger lit up in my chest.

It was Annabeth Chase.

Doesn't she give up? I thought.

ANNABETH

Two hours before the end of Noah's class, I was waiting outside his school. Thalia gave me the address and I thought that if Percy wasn't going to give me the chance to talk to my son, then I'd have to resort to other methods.

I stood there, eyes trained on the energetic five year-old blonde boy who was very active in participating in his class. I watched as he received three stars from his teacher for answering the questions in the board correctly. My lips were stretched into a smile while my eyes were watering. How could I have been so selfish, leaving him like that? I asked myself. Even before I met him, I had regretted my decision every single day. A moment didn't pass without my thinking of what my life could've been if I had been more brave to face my responsibilities.

Everything about me seemed to have been turned upside down the moment I set foot in San Francisco, away from my family. My sleeping schedule had become abnormal, my apetite was mostly nonexistent and I refused to interact with anyone, even with my two younger stepbrothers, Bobby and Matthew. Back then, I felt like a part of me had been ripped away from me painfully.

Somehow, seeing Noah and Percy earlier reopened all the wounds I had worked so hard to close. Then I realized that they were never closed in the first place. It was like my heart had been broken again, but then again, how could it break when it wasn't whole to begin with? I knew Percy would never let me come anywhere near him, but I didn't anticipate his outburst. I knew him. Even when he was aggravated or furious, Percy never yelled. He mostly kept quiet and wait for the situation to cool off before trying to resolve it. His reaction surprised me, though when I looked back at it, I guess it was predictable. We weren't talking about him, or me, alone, but our son. Noah was obviously the reason why he was so mad.

I wasn't trying to be let back in their lives. I just wanted to be given a chance to hold my son, even for once.

When I heard the bell rang, I stood up and went closer to the door to wait for him.

That's when I saw a car approaching, a car that was driven by Percy Jackson. I nearly backed out and ran to my apartment, but one glance at my son, I felt this extreme longing in my chest that could only be cured by a quick hug from Noah. So I calmed down and steeled myself before following him. Percy was strapping our son down on the seat. I watched as he gave a small bow and went to the passenger's side. He was about to get in when I took hold of his hand.

He slammed his door and glared at me. "What do you want, Chase?" he asked.

I swallowed thickly before answering. "I just want some time to spend with my son – "

"Was I not clear this morning?" he hissed. "Or do you need me to repeat it? You have no right to go anywhere near him."

"Percy, as much as you hate me, you can't erase the fact that I was the one who gave birth to Noah. I'm still his mother," I said, my voice rising.

He stepped closer to me, his eyes hardening. "Don't try me, Chase. You have no idea what I can do when it comes to protecting my son. You – "

A door opened and Noah climbed out. "Daddy, come on! I want my pizza!" He then noticed me and ran next to his father. He gave me a confident and yet innocent smile. "Hello, you're the girl from the coffee shop, right?" Noah held out his hand. "You didn't give me your name. I think you remember mine?"

I was having trouble breathing. Just standing there within his proximity was like being in a euphoric state. I knelt in front of him and I saw Percy stiffen, but he didn't do anything. "Of course," I whispered, my throat tight. "Aedan Noah. How can I forget a name as beautiful as yours?"

Noah beamed. "Thank you. Daddy named me." He gave me another smile. "You still haven't told me your name."

"I'm – "

"Come on, Noah," Percy interrupted, steering the boy by his shoulder.

"But Daddy, she hasn't given my her name yet," Noah protested. He then started nodding, his eyebrows scrunched up. "Oh, I know! Why don't you come with us?" he said to me. "Daddy and I will be having a pizza." He turned back to his father. "She can come, right, Daddy?" Noah didn't even wait for his father's replay as he jumped back in the car, saying, "Cool!"

Percy looked at me, his eyes mad and hesitant. He then seemed to recognize there was no possible way to win against a five year-old who was about to get his pizza. He sighed in defeat and got inside, not bothering to open the door for me. I didn't min, though. I jumped in the backseat and Percy immediately started the car, driving off.

Noah was talking animatedly the whole way, informing Percy about his day at school. "Then Ms. Laney said that whale sharks are vicious but I said that whale sharks are actually very peaceful, unless they feel threatened. That's right, isn't it, Daddy?"

Percy gave a soft chuckle. "Right, buddy," he said, ruffling his son's hair, who ducked out of the way and glared at him.

Soon enough we stopped and Noah unclasped his seat belt and jumped out of the car, clapping his hand and saying, "Come on, Daddy! You're such a slowpoke!"

I got out and followed the two of them. Noah was holding on to Percy's hand as he skipped merrily to the pizzeria. I wondered when the time would come when my son would hold my hand that way. I forced back the sob in the throat.

Percy found a table and quickly sat down after setting Noah beside him, blocking the way so I wouldn't be able to sit beside my son. I resigned by sitting on the seat in front of them. I could see Percy's reluctance when he stood up to order. I wanted to tell him that I wasn't going to do – or even say anything; just sitting there and seeing my son happy was enough for me – but Noah beat me to it. "It's okay, Daddy. I'll behave. I'll try not to ask too many questions," he said placatingly. Percy raised his eyebrows at him. "And I think you can order on your own, right, Daddy?"

Percy rolled his eyes before walking away to the counter to place his order, but not before Noah yelled, "Hawaiian and pepperoni, Daddy. And don't forget the extra cheese!" When his father nodded, Noah turned to me, smiling that angelic smile of his. "So, you haven't answered my question yet."

I swallowed once again and blinked back the tears in my eyes. I wanted so badly to reach out, hold him and put him on my lap, kiss his face endlessly and tickle his belly until he laughed that contagious laugh of his I heard earlier that day. But I stopped myself. I knew I couldn't rush him.

"Annabeth," I whispered. "My name is Annabeth Chase."

Noah frowned and cocked his head to the side, a gesture that brought more tears to my eyes. That was a mannerism of mine whenever I was thinking or being skeptical – a trait he obviously inherited from me. "I think I heard your name once," he said, snapping his fingers, obviously thinking. That particular gesture was from Percy. I found it totally endearing and amazing that Percy's and my genes created such a wonderful boy. "Aha!" he exclaimed. "I heard Uncle Nico and Daddy talking about you. Do you know my Daddy? I think so. He's really cool, right?"

I nodded, biting my lip, wondering whether I'd hear him call me cool. "Yes, he is."

Noah placed both his elbows on the top of the table in front of him. "So, how did you meet my Daddy?"

I took some time before I could answer. "We were classmates back in high school."

He frowned. "But Daddy never showed me a picture of yours. He sometimes shows me pictures of him with Aunt Thalia, Uncle Nico and Uncle Grover and all his friends but he never showed me your photo. I wonder why," he said, massaging his chin.

"Maybe because he burned all of them," I blurted out before I could stop myself.

He tilted his head to the side. "Why would Daddy do that?"

I took in a shaky breath. "Because I hurt him, Noah," I said. "I did something terrible and hurt him in the worst way possible; I abandoned him and – "

"Alright, that's enough," a voice said above us. I looked up and saw Percy's blurry face – that's when I realized I had been crying. "Come on, Noah. We'll go home now."

"But Daddy, the pizzas – "

"We'll take them home," Percy said with finality. He looked at his son. "Noah, I need you to go back to the car and wait there for me." Noah was about to protest when Percy silenced him with a look.

My son exhaled sadly and jumped off of his seat. "Fine," he said, then looked at me. "I'll see you again, Annabeth. Come visit me at our apartment."

"Okay," I whispered, then I watched him exit the pizzeria and into his father's car. I looked back at Percy who was glaring at me and braced myself for another round of yelling and argument.

"I gave you a chance, Annabeth," he said, pointing a finger at me. "I gave you a little chance to talk to him and you just ruined that. You have no right to dig out the past and get my son involved in it. It will just hurt him, or do you even care about Noah's feelings?"

I stood up and faced him. "Of course I do – "

"Oh? Then why did you have to relive it right in front of him? Why did you have to let out the ghosts of our past to hunt him? Do you have any idea what those will do to him? It will ruin him," he hissed, dropping the pizza boxes on the table. "All I care about now is Noah. Our past doesn't mean anything to me anymore. And if you as much as open it up in front of him, you will answer to me." He picked up the pizza boxes and went off, leaving me watching his retreating back.

That had been two days ago and I was still trying to find a time when I could have Noah to myself and have a talk to him without Percy, but he seemed to be bent on staying with our son 24/7, which made it impossible.

I was starting to think that maybe I would never get the chance until I got a call that afternoon.

I was browsing the internet in my laptop when my phone rang. I picked it up, wondering who it was for the number was unregistered. I clicked answer and held it against my ear. "Hello?"

"Annabeth Chase?" the voice from the other line asked.

"Yes, who is this?"

"I'm Hades calling from the Underworld and am about to reclaim your soul," he answered. "Seriously, Chase. You don't remember the ever-awesome Nico di Angelo?"

"Nico?" I asked. I was answered by a hm-mm. "Why are you calling me?"

"Listen, I know you want to be with your son and my cousin isn't exactly letting you, so I'm giving you an offer – an offer to spend some quality time with Noah. Meet me at the mall, will you?"

I had an answer even before he was done speaking.

[Next - Chapter 4: SEVERED FAMILY TIES]