Riley.

We found a small clump of trees, and stopped under it for lunch. Dee took the cooler out of her bag.

"I don't have the berries to make soup, so don't ask, Riley," She announced. "Send out your pokemon, and I'll feed them first."

Amber and I sent out Magby and Aron, and Dee let Snorunt and Eevee loose. Dee set out bowls for them, pouring food for each individual type.

"Riolu, honey, please stop giving Astro your food when you think we don't see," Dee advised. "If that asshole bullies you into feeding him, beat him up and take his."

Astro scoffed. "I'm not that big of a pig, you camoflage bitch!"

Riolu snickered, popping a food pellet into his mouth.

Dee made us bologna sandwiches, and handed out cans of soda for us to drink with them. We sat under the trees, watching our pokemon.

Eevee really was the bully of the bunch. He tried to steal Magby's food, but Aron stood up and nearly tackled him away from the bowl. Eevee and Aron had a little scuffle before Astro pulled Aron away, muttering, "Don't pick fights you can't win, idiot."

I bit into my crappy bologna sandwich. "I think your Eevee is really taking after you, Dee Dee."

Dee punched me in the shoulder. "Shut up! It's not like your Riolu is doing anything."

She was right. I shut my mouth.

It was a few more minutes after that, but Astro got that look about him again. That "shit, what was that?" look.

He looked around at the other pokemon cautiously, then tiptoed over to us. Riolu noticed, watching Astro carefully with that too-familiar concerned look in his eyes.

"Guys?" Astro's voice was low.

Amber sat up a little straighter. "What's wrong?"

Astro looked around. "That thing, from earlier? I'm not 100% sure, but I think it's behind that tree Riley's sitting against."

I sat bolt upright, seperating the fabric of my hoodie from the tree like the bark burned me. I swear to God, my heart stopped.

"What?" I didn't mean to sound annoyed, but I did.

Astro threw his paws up. "I dunno. I guess it followed us."

The girls glanced back at me. Dee had anannoyed expression, while Amber looked upset.

"What d'ya want me to do?" I asked.

"Go take care of it!" Amber whispered urgently.

I deadpanned. "Are you serious."

"You're the guy, Riley," Dee pointed out. "It's your job to do stuff like this. Or are you chicken?"

"But what if that...that thing kills me?"

"Then you did your job well."

I sighed. "You girls're killin' me." I stood up, groaning, and creeped around the tree trunk.

Something was definitely skulking around near the base of the tree. I held up the remains of my sandwich, pulling off a piece.

"God, I hope it likes bologna." I threw the torn chunk a little off to the side, and the pokemon dashed out to nibble at it. I got a better look at it.

It was a furry, purple pokemon, with a big furry tail and puffy round cheeks. It ate the chunk I fed it, then stared at me for more.

"Uhhh..." I wasn't very good at dealing with wild pokemon. Beldum, yes; Geodude, yes; Aron, hell yes; but not really anything...organic.

As I went to tear off another piece, Astro holloered from the other side of the tree, "Riley! What is it?"

That startled the pokemon. It bucked up on its front legs, and sprayed me with something that I pray was from its tail. A few drops got in my eyes, and it really irritated them.

"Gah!" I dropped my sandwich and rubbed my eyes. "Damn you, Astro, you scared it away!"

Astro and the girls ran to check on me. When I opened my eyes, the Stunky was gone. The girls practically recoiled.

I dusted myself off. "What?"

"Riley, what the the actual hell," Dee growled, "is that stench?"

At first I was confused, but then the smell hit me like a mallet to the face. It was...it was like rotten fish, and sweaty socks, and...everything wrong with the world.

I held my hand over my nose. "Jesus," I muttered. "Astro, you idiot! When you scared that Stunky, it frickin' sprayed me!"

"Well, excuse me for being concerned!" Astro yelled back.

Amber pulled out her pokedex and searched for Stunky, her hand over her nose like a mask.

"Stunky, the Skunk pokemon. It protects itself by spraying a noxious fluid from its rear. The overwhelming odor can linger for over 24 hours."

I groaned. "Lovely."

Amber frowned. "It also says Stunky aren't supposed to be in this part of the region," She added. "At least, not under normal circumstances."

"Lovely. Not only do I now smell like Flint's armpits, the Stunky came from God knows where to do it."

We decided to pack up for now, nobody coming anywhere near me due to the stench. Not even Riolu. The only one of us, human, pokemon, or Astro, who would come near me was my own Aron.

As we kept heading north, I checked my map.

"There's a cabin up ahead, a little inn for travelers," I shouted out to Amber and Dee. "Think they'll let me take a bath?" Amber, Dee, and Astro were at least ten feet away from me, and could still smell it.

And I could understand. I smelled absolutely foul.

"They better," Dee hollered back, breathing through the sleeve of her jacket. "You've got to take a tomato juice bath, boy."

"We'll ask," Amber added.

Hours Later.

It took a few hours, but we finally found that damn inn.

The owners of the Moomoo Inn were very understanding, and thank God, let me take a bath. The wife even offered to wash my clothes for me.

The tomato juice was really cold. It had come out of a big-ass can from the fridge. I mixed it with water, of course, to make it fill the tub.

I let my head fall back against the wall, closing my eyes and sighing heavily. "Why does this crap always have to happen to Riley?" I asked myself aloud.

Of course, nobody answered. I sunk a little lower in the watery-tomato goop, groaning.

Dee.

Downstairs.

"...Oh my. It had been following you that long?"

I nodded. "Yes, sir." I took a sip at my glass of Moomoo Milk.

The couple that ran the inn were understanding of what happened. Even gave us free milk.

The man handed Astro a small glass of milk. Amber cleared her throat.

"Excuse me, sir?" She piped up. "May my Riolu have chocolate mi-?"

Astro shook his head at her, lips tightly pursed, and even I understood the message: Don't be rude.

"Um. Nevermind."

The nice man's wife came down from drawing Riley a bath, carrying his jeans, undershirt, t-shirt, and hoodie.

"Your friend certainly dresses warm for October," She noted. "I'd sooner expect you to bring him here for a heatstroke."

She went and put Riley's clothes in to wash near the back of the inn, and when she returned, I retold what had happened again.

The wife shook her head, tsking. "We keep on hearing stories like that more and more lately," She sighed. "Ain't that right, Ed?"

"Sadly so," Mr. Ed answered, sighing as well. "Where're you kids headed to? Celestic Town or Veilstone?"

Amber gulped down some milk. "Veilstone, sir," She answered politely. "We're meeting some friends, and Riley's planning on challenging the gym..."

"That sounds 'bout right," Mr. Ed's wife confirmed. "I hear Veilstone's got a new gym leader; young upstart that's gone all around the world, something like that." She nodded at me. "You tell your boyfriend that, y'hear?"

I just about blushed. "That...he...R-Riley is not my boyfriend, ma'am."

She chuckled slyly. "I don't know. The way you talk about him..."

I could hear Astro sniggering into his milk. If he hadn't have been half my size and capable of easy cold-blooded murder, I would have punched him.

Conversation remained comfortably awkward until Riley finally decided to grace us with his presence, in his pajamas, while toweling off his hair.

"Had to take a second bath to get all the tomato juice off of me," He muttered into the towel, rubbing it furiously against his hair. "What's with all of the milk? Did I miss something?"