black.

CH16

Edward caught Bella right before she hit the ground, gasps echoing around the church. As a doctor, Edward should have known what to do in this situation, but as a man who just saw the only woman he has ever cared about collapse, knowing her condition, he had no idea what to do. He pushed the hair off of her forehead and shook her body lightly, as if he were trying to wake her. "Bella, Bella, talk to me!" he could hear his father pushing through the throng of people surrounding them, and his mother was heard somewhere in the background screaming for someone to call an ambulance.

Carlisle knelt down beside his son and placed his fingers over Bella's carotid artery, checking for her pulse. It was faint, but definitely there. His eyes roamed the crowd searching for signs of any medical help, but as far as he could tell, he and Edward were the only two in the room. "Edward, I'm going to need you to remain calm." One look at his son and he could tell he was freaking out. His skin had flushed white; his eyes blood shot, his arms shaking. "Continue to monitor her pulse, I'm going to get the car." He pushed through the crowd and was out the door before Edward could say anything.

"Fuck, Fuck, Fuck." He mumbled, holding Bella's limp body close to his own. He could hear his sister behind the crowd, screaming for them all to move, but the room remained still, watching the almost lifeless girl before them.

"We need to get her to the hospital quick." This time it was Charlie in his ear. Bella's father's voice was very calm, but Edward could tell by looking into his eyes that he was scared shitless. "Pick her up, the car is outside." Charlie squeezed Edward's shoulder before placing a small kiss on his daughter's forehead. "I'll make sure we get there quick."

The ride to the hospital was short, with Charlie in front of them, sirens blaring, everyone moved out of his way, but for Edward the ride felt like it took hours. He hadn't let his eyes move from Bella's face the entire time, his hand holding hers so tightly he wasn't sure if it would leave a mark or not. He was hoping for a sign, anything that she was still there with them. Once in the hospital though, Edward was forced to let her go. The doctor, who had introduced himself as Emmett McCarty, pushed the gurney through the back doors and out of his sight. He paced the floor for a while, tugging at his tie, his hair. He and Carlisle stood alone in the waiting room for quite some time before anyone else arrived, first being his mother, then his sister and Jasper.

Alice ran through the halls, wedding dress hiked up so she could go faster, tears and mascara rolling down her face. "WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME?" she was shouting once she burst through the doors. Jasper's hands on her shoulders, which were usually soothing, were not doing much to calm her. Someone had told her the news on the ride here, that Bella had cancer, that everyone knew but her, and she was not taking well to the information. "Why didn't any of you tell me this was happening to her?" Her eyes cut to Edward quickly, her gaze so sharp he could feel it cut through him. "And you! You just up and left her! Knowing this! I cant fucking believe you!" She stomped toward him, hand in the air, and he braced himself for the impact of the slap. Even though he knew nothing about Bella's illness when he left, he still left, he still felt like he deserved his sister's hatred. He should have stayed, pushed her, he should have seen through her. He should have known. But still, he hadn't known, she hadn't told him, and she wanted him to leave.

"I didn't know. I didn't know any of this was going on. I let myself hate her." The guilt washed over Edward in waves. Why did he let this happen? How could he have let this happen? His head fell back as the tears rolled down his face. Why didn't he just come home sooner? "I asked her to marry me." He blurted, his eyes still up toward the ceiling. "She said no. That's why I left." Alice's hand dropped, as did all the chins in the room. The once loud, chaotic waiting room turned silent. "She spewed off something about not being good enough. About me deserving more. I took it and left. So yeah, Alice, I shouldn't have left. I know that now. So if you want to hit me, go ahead. I couldn't possibly hurt more than I already do right now." Alice's eyes were spilling over again, as well as his mothers and fathers. He knew his father felt badly for keeping this from all of them, and he knew from the look on his face that he now felt even worse, but this wasn't Carlisle's fault. This wasn't Bella's fault. Edward took the blame happily because he's the one who left, and he could have been the one to save her.

The waiting room doors opened once more, this time a broken looking Charlie and a sullen Dr. McCarty were the ones entering. Charlie shook his head, as if to tell them without words that something was very wrong. The doctor forced out a small smile and sat the family down. "There isn't very much I can do." He made eye contact with each of the people in the room and Edward knew from experience he was trying to make them feel more comfortable. "She's in a medically induced coma now. Her body is very tired." Edward's hands gripped the chair so tight he thought he'd break right through it. "Without any positive donor, her chances are very slim." Edward's head pounded. His body tensing at every word coming out of the doctor's mouth. He had lost Bella before, for four years, but somewhere deep inside of him he had always loved her. No matter what thoughts went through his mind, in his heart, buried deep, he had loved her. He still did love her. Here and now his heart was breaking all over again, but this time, he wasn't going down without a fight.

"Test me."

Sorry about the wait guys! Spring Break and what not, but I'll be posting this week!