I do not own RvB or RWBY
After their initial meeting with Tex and the awkward question that followed after, she had told all of them that she would speak with the girls herself for some "girl-talk". So Church, Tucker, ad Caboose stood several feet away, while Tex was talking with the girls.
Team RWBY watched as Tex was having her talk with Sister.
"I wonder what they're talking about?" Ruby asked.
"From what I've seen abut this Tex person, she's probably not saying anything good," Weiss said.
"Can you hear anything Blake?" Yang asked.
"I'm trying to focus," Blake said. "I can't get much, she's talking really fast. But from what I can tell, she telling Sister about the Blues. Calling them her idiots and jerks, then something about turning them against her, and her crying."
"That doesn't sound good," Ruby said.
"I also noticed something now that I can hear Tex talk more," Blake said as she faced her teammates. "Did any of you notice that Tex sounds a lot like-"
"Professor Goodwitch," Ruby, Weiss, and Yang finished.
They all agreed that Tex sounded exactly like their professor at Beacon, Glynda Goodwitch.
"Well, if her personality is anything like the Professor's..." Weiss wondered.
"You four!" Tex shouted to them. "Get over here now!"
The four of them flinched at order. There were many differences between Tex and Professor Goodwitch, but one similarity between the two was the commanding tone in her voice. The four of them quickly made their way to her.
"Now, let talk," Tex said facing the four of them.
"What do you want to talk about?" Yang asked, trying to sound calm, though being around Tex made her nervous, as if she needed to be ready for a fight.
"First of all, who are you?" Tex said, her tone of someone demanding an answer.
"Okay then," Ruby said a she took a deep breath. She then pushed Weiss forward. "Weiss, answer her question."
"What!?" Weiss said in shock. "You answer, you're the leader."
"And as the leader, I'm delegating the task of explaining to you," Ruby said. "Besides, you do it better."
"I don't care who it is," Tex said, her impatience growing. "Just give me a damn answer!"
Weiss growled at Ruby's trick, but took a deep breath calm down. She then began to tell Tex the same story they told the Red and Blues, that they're from another dimension, and how they asked for help from the Reds and Blues. Or as close enough to help as they could give.
"Okay," Tex said, after hearing their explanation. "Now, give me an explanation that's actually believable!"
"But it's the truth!" Ruby shouted. When Tex turned to look at her, she immediately hid behind Yang.
"Seriously!?" Tex said, still not believing them. "This bullshit might work with those idiots, but I'm smarter than them and less easy to trick, especially with a stupid lie like that. So tell me who you people really are and where you came from, or we're gonna have a problem."
"We are telling the truth," Blake said. "Look at us, we don't know anything about this world or what was happening around here until the Reds and Blues told us."
"That could mean you're lying or you're stupid," Tex said. "Probably the latter."
"Okay, that's it," Yang said, a slight flicker of red in her eyes. "Listen here, lady. I don't know who you think you are, but what we've told you is the truth. That's the only answer you're getting from us. And if you want a fight, we're more than capable of taking you."
Tex was silent for a moment. Ruby, Weiss, and Blake looked at Yang with shock at her outburst.
Surprisingly, Tex actually chuckled a bit. "You got balls kid, I'll give you that. Alright, here's what going to happen. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. As long as you don't get in my way, and nothing you're doing stops me from finding O'Malley, we won't have any problems."
"And, hypothetically," Ruby said. "What if we accidentally did get in the way?"
"You see those rocks," Tex pointed over to a rock at a distance.
The four of them nodded.
"Now imagine that rock is you," Tex said as she tossed a grenade at the rock. It exploded after a few seconds. "I hope it won't have to come to that."
"Y-yes Professor," Ruby said before realizing what she said. "I mean Ma'am! I mean Ms. Texwitch! I mean-"
Both Weiss and Blake placed their hands over Ruby's mouth to keep her from speaking any further.
Tex said nothing as she walked away.
Once she was at a distance, Weiss and Blake removed their hands from Ruby.
"If you want to die, go ahead," Weiss said. "But please don't drag the rest of us along with you." She then looked at Yang. "That goes the same for you."
Yang just gave them an apologetic look and shrug.
"So, now what?" Blake asked.
"Now, I get back to Red base and try to find a way for us to get home," Weiss said.
"Have you thought of anything?" Ruby asked.
Weiss sighed. "Unfortunately, I might have thought of something. But it would involve letting them use some of the experimental Dust that brought us here in the first place."
"I thought we agreed that we weren't going to let them near the ship and the Dust," Ruby reminded them.
"I know," Weiss said. "But it's not as if we have many options. If that Dust brought us here, maybe there's a way we can use it to send us back."
"So we'll just have to trust that the Reds won't keep some for themselves?" Blake asked.
"Unless any of you came up with anything else, I'm all ears," Weiss said.
No spoke up.
"It's settled then," Weiss said.
"Look guys," Yang said. "I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. The Reds wouldn't be that smart to steal any Dust. Besides, they seem like nice guys. We can trust them."
Blake sighed. "Both of you just keep an eye on them when they handle the Dust."
"Got it," Yang said. "Let's go."
The two of them then made their way back to Red base.
As they left, Ruby and Blake began to hear Church shouting. They turned to see Church, Tucker, Caboose, and Doc talking with each other.
"Come on," Blake said. "Let's go see what's Church mad about now."
"Don't be so negative Blake," Ruby said. "I mean, you don't have to assume Church is mad."
"I am so mad!" Church shouted.
Those were the words Ruby and Blake heard as they arrived to see what the commotion was about.
"What is it now?" Blake asked.
"I'll tell you what's it about," Church said. "Doc just came back from checking on Sheila, and his only diagnosis is that 'something's wrong with her', which we already knew!"
"I'm a medic," Doc said. "What do you want from me?"
"How about fixing her?" Church asked.
"Well surprisingly my medical training didn't cover internal combustion," Doc replied sarcastically.
Church growled.
"Okay," Ruby said, getting between the two to make sure Church didn't try to kill Doc. "Let's just try figuring out a way to fix Sheila."
"Fine," Church said. "Doc, go back down there and see if you can reboot Sheila."
"Reboot her?" Blake said.
"Yeah that's how you fix broken stuff," Tucker said. "You turn her off, and then you turn her on again. She'll be fine."
"I don't think that'll work," Doc said.
"Uh, pardon me, it works great," Church said. "We already rebooted the toaster, we rebooted the teleporter..."
"Yeah, I still don't know if that thing has all the bugs worked out," Tucker said.
"We even rebooted Caboose's armor once," Church said. "Although, that took a lot longer to come back online than we thought it would."
"It was dark and I got to hold my breath," Caboose said. "I'm pretty sure there was no side-effects."
Blake really doubted that.
"No, I mean I don't think it'll work because I'm not going back down there," Doc said. "She's not exactly in the best of moods."
As if on cue, Sheila fired at their general direction, causing the ground to shake from the blast.
"See?" Doc stated.
"Yeah, we need to get someone sneaky down there who can turn her off," Church said.
"How about Tucker?" Doc suggested,
"Who me!?" Tucker said in surprise. "No way! I'm a lover, not a sneaker."
"Is that your response to everything?" Blake asked.
"What can I tell you?" Tucker said, shrugging. "I'm a lover, not a thinker."
"What about Ruby?" Doc suggested again.
"No way," Ruby said. "As much as I would love to have more time with the talking tank, I think I might just make her more angry. What about you, Blake? You can be sneaky when you need to."
"Only if it's night, and if I have better cover" Blake said. "In case you didn't notice, we're in the middle of an open canyon that apparently doesn't get dark."
"How about Tex?" Tucker suggested.
After their talk, Tex had apparently gone to check around the canyon and do some reconnaissance. It was most likely an excuse to not speak with Church or the rest of Blue team.
"Yeah, I don't think we could afford it," Church said. "If only we knew someone that Sheila trusted. And it would have to be someone kinda dumb, so that we could fool them in to betraying that trust, for our purposes."
As he finished speaking, everyone looked at Caboose.
"Hey," Caboose said, looking at Church and the rest. "Everyone is looking at me. I love when they do that, Hi everybody!"
After Weiss and Yang split up from Ruby and Blake, they headed first to their crashed Bullhead before going back to Red base. They had picked up several canisters full of crystals of the experimental Dust, hoping it was enough for Simmons to work with.
When they did arrive in Red base, they were not surprised to see Simmons once again yelling at Grif. What did surprise them was to see a still unconscious Sarge on the base floor.
"Hey, you brought Sarge back in the base," Yang said, stopping Simmons' shouting.
"Why's he still unconscious?" Weiss asked. She looked at Simmons. "Did you knock him out again?"
"Okay, first of all, we have no proof of that," Simmons said defensively. "Second, if you want to know why he's still knocked out, it was Grif's fault."
"Hey!" Grif shouted, offended.
"Well, it's true!" Simmons said.
"Grif," Yang said to him. "Care to explain?"
Grif groaned. "Fine. Look, Simmons was busy fixing your Scroll things, and you two took off to Blue base, so it was left to me to bring Sarge back to the base."
"You carried him in the base by yourself?" Weiss asked.
Grif scoffed. "No way. I used the Warthog."
"Specifically, he used the Warthog's tow hook," Simmons added.
"Wait," Weiss said, staring to realize what happened. "You used the hook of your jeep and placed it on Sarge."
"Pretty much," Grif replied.
"So you just drove your jeep back to the base, dragging him behind," Weiss continued, her tone becoming even more exasperated.
"Yes," Grif said. "That was kind of implied."
"Do you have any idea how dangerous that is!?" Weiss shouted.
"Hey," Grif said. "I don't know why you're all complaining. I brought Sarge back to base, you should be happy. Besides, if our roles were reversed, Sarge would do the same thing to me."
"Well, he's not wrong," Simmons admitted.
Weiss just sighed as she turned to Simmons. "Anyway, we want you to help us work on these." She held up the canisters of Dust. "This is the Dust that brought us here."
"Isn't dust suppose to look like powder?" Grif said, looking at the canister.
"This is another form of Dust," Weiss clarified.
"What do you want me to do with it?" Simmons asked.
"We were hoping you could figure out a way to use it so we can go back home," Yang explained.
Simmons took one of the canisters and examined it. "Maybe if I can hook up this Dust into some sort of transport system, like one of the teleporters, I could recalibrate it-"
"Well, this is turning into nerd talk," Grif said. "If anyone needs me, I'll be taking a nap. So... don't need me." He then walked off.
Simmons just shook his head. "I guess that just leaves three of-" He then saw that Yang was gone as well. "Where's Yang?"
Weiss turned around and saw Yang was gone. She sighed. "Knowing her, she probably decided to leave this work to us and went off to do something else. You just can't have good help."
"I feel your pain," Simmons agreed.
"Well then," Weiss said. "Shall we get to work?"
"Well, I suppose I should figure out a way to get Tex to reboot Sheila," Church said. "Where is she anyway?"
Ruby scanned the canyon and soon pointed at Tex, who was going around Blue base.
"Great," Church said unenthusiastically. "Man, I'm gonna have to call in a lot of favors for this one."
"What favors could you possibly have stored up with someone who dumped you?" Tucker asked.
"She didn't dump me Tucker, it was mutual," Church clarified.
"I doubt that," Blake muttered quietly.
"Mutual in what way?" Tucker said. "Mutual in the sense that you were both single the moment after she dumped you?"
"Yeah, that way," Church replied flatly. "Caboose, Ruby, let's go explain the plan to Tex."
"Why is Ruby going with you?" Blake asked. Ruby also gave a questioning look.
"Because in the off chance that one of us might piss her off, we probably have better odds of not getting killed by her if we have a kid present," Church explained.
"Good point," Blake agreed. "Just make sure nothing happens to her."
"Hey, if anyone's getting hurt, it'll probably be us," Church said. "Wish us luck." Church, Caboose, and Ruby, then headed to Tex.
"Yeah right," Tucker said. "Hey, when she kills you I'm gonna sell your armor to that pink guy on the Red team. I hear he's in the market."
"You do know that the pink guy is dead, right?" Blake told Tucker.
"Oh, really?" Tucker said. "Eh, I guess I'll sell it to someone else."
"'Sup,"
Tucker, Doc, and Blake turned to see Sister standing beside them.
"Who's the yellow one?" Doc asked.
"That's Sister," Blake said.
"She's new," Tucker said.
"No one told me about a new arrival," Doc said. "I'm supposed to examine everyone before they assume active duty."
"Don't sweat it. I already checked her out for you," Tucker said. "Diagnosis: F.I.N.E. ...That spells fine."
"Thanks," Doc said sarcastically. "But I think a trained medical professional should be the one to-"
"I'm a doctor - a doctor of love," Tucker said. "PhD. Certified Loooveology, General Harasstitioner. Sexicologist."
Blake just shook her head at how ridiculous Tucker sounded right now.
"First of all, love is not an officially recognized specialty," Doc stated. "And also, PhDs? Pff, not really doctors."
"Dude you a dork," Tucker said.
"You're one to talk," Blake commented.
"Anyway," Doc turned to Sister. "Hello, I'm the medic. If it's alright with you, I need to give you a quick physical examination since you're new. Do you want to come to Base where you might feel more comfortable taking off all your clothes?"
"Sure, lead the way," Sister replied. "See ya Tucker. Bye Blake." The two of them then headed inside the base.
"What the fuck just happened?" Tucker asked in confusion.
"I think you just got shot down," Blake said, trying to hide a small smile at seeing Tucker's shock.
When Church, Caboose, and Ruby reached Tex, Church began to explain their plan.
"So Caboose is gonna be up front talking to her, and then while he's got her distracted, you sneak around the back, access the panel, and shut her down," Church finished.
"Okay," Tex said after a moment. "I'll do it."
"Wait really?" Ruby said. From the little time that she knew Tex, she considered Tex as someone who wouldn't agree to something like this so quickly.
"You will?" Church was confused as well. "No bargaining? No ridiculous demands?"
"No," Tex replied. "I'm trying to find O'Malley and his friend. In a way, you guys are helping me. If anyone should be making demands it should be you."
"Really!" Ruby said, a little glad that they might actually get something from this.
"Oh," Church said. "Well in that case, we want-"
"Too late," Tex said. "Deal's done."
"Dammit," Church cursed. Ruby was also sad at the missed opportunity.
"So, um," Caboose spoke up. "How should I distract Sheila?"
"You could just talk to her?" Ruby suggested.
"Yeah, talk to her," Church agreed. "Keep her attention, that's it."
"I don't know," Caboose said. "We kinda have a history. And, uh, she may not want to talk to me."
"History?" Ruby said to Church, looking for an answer to Caboose's statement.
"Short version is Caboose was sorta in love with Sheila," Church said. "It was weird."
"That doesn't sound weird at all," Ruby said. If she had the chance to have a talking Crescent Rose, she wouldn't be ashamed to admit she'd probably be in love with it as well. "You don't choose who or what you love."
"Whatever," Church said as he turned his attention back to Caboose. "Caboose you'll be fine. Tex and I have a history, doesn't mean we can't be professional and hold a conversation."
"I wouldn't exactly call them conversations," Tex interjected.
Church groaned. "Get off my back woman, can't you see I'm working here?"
"Please," Tex said. "You call this working?"
"Okay, that's enough," Ruby said, getting between the two. "No need to fight."
"See, this is exactly what could happen with me and Sheila," Caboose said. "Only with more getting shot by tanks."
"Caboose, if that happened, I'm sure the shell would just bounce off you and land on me somehow," Church said.
Ruby snickered a little at hearing that, imagining the scenario as something from a cartoon. Church gave her a look that made her stop.
He then turned back to Caboose. "Just smooth talk her."
"I don't know how to do that," Caboose said.
"Just tell her she's pretty," Church suggested. "Or, or that she's got that new-tank smell or something. Compliment her treads, it doesn't matter."
"I don't know..." Caboose said.
"It's easy," Church said. "Look here, just practice on Ruby."
Ruby gave Caboose a wide smile, happy to help him.
"Or on Tex," Church continued. "She's...womanish."
"Pardon me?" Tex said, some slight offense in her tone.
"Do you want Caboose to run decoy for you, or do you wanna try this on your own?" Church offered.
Sheila fired another shell in their general direction, exploding behind Tex.
"I see your point," Tex said.
"Go ahead," Church said to Caboose. Caboose then approached Ruby and Tex.
At that moment, Tucker and Blake approached Church.
"Hello Ruby and Tex," Caboose began.
"Dude," Tucker said to Church. "You will not believe what Doc just pulled off."
"Shut up Tucker," Church said. "Don't interrupt."
"Interrupt what?" Tucker asked.
"What's going on?" Blake asked as well.
Caboose began speaking. "Ruby I think you are a nice girl with a nice red hood, and I was happy when you helped me off the floor. And Tex, I think you are pretty, and you haven't hurt my body in a long time. So I was hoping that we could talk and be friends maybe and hold hands, and both of you would go with me? And when we go out together, you would be my real girlfriends."
"Oh, Caboose," Ruby answered sweetly. "I would love to."
"I think that would be nice, Caboose," Tex replied, forcing the words out of her mouth. "We should... definitely do that."
Blake was suppressing a laugh, finding the entire odd scene somewhat sweet.
Tucker on the other hand stepped forward.
"What the hell!" Tucker shouted. "Ruby, Tex, have you gone crazy!? If you wanna get with somebody get with me, the love doctor! I'm a real man! I will rock your fucking world."
Both Tex and Ruby looked at Church. Ruby's expression was one of confusion and cluelessness with Tucker's inclusion in the scenario. Tex looked at Church for an explanation.
"Hey, don't look at me," Church said. "He's not part of the plan."
Tex responded by punching Tucker right in his jaw.
"Ow!" Tucker yelled as he fell to the ground. "What is going on around here!?"
"What's going on is that you're an idiot," Blake said.
"Yeah, I don't think I'm going to use Tucker's "rock your world" line," Caboose said. "I think I'm gonna stick with my own material."
"Okay," Church said. "Let's try this again.