Author's Note: Thank you very much for all your reviews and for your messages, I really appreciate it.
Chapter Eighteen
They had made it on time. The high-speed train had arrived just as the clouds had begun to darken in the pale light of the day. They had taken a taxi to their hotel immediately and they were now observing the ballet of the waves from the large windows of their suite.
Spring tide in Saint-Malo.
"Saint-Malo is a walled port city in Brittany in northwestern France on the English Channel. The city became notorious as the home of the corsairs, French privateers and sometimes pirates..."
"Pirates?!"
The way Jane's dark eyes widened under the effect of surprise made Maura smile. They had walked into their suite fifteen minutes earlier only and their destination was still a complete mystery to Jane apart from what she had seen during their taxi ride which was a set of tiny buildings and a ribbon of gray with a few ferries on it: the English Channel.
"Pirates, yes... The corsairs of Saint-Malo not only forced English ships passing up the Channel to pay tribute, but also brought wealth from further afield. Jacques Cartier, who sailed the Saint-Lawrence River and visited the sites of Quebec City and Montreal and is thus credited as the discoverer of Canada lived in and sailed from Saint-Malo."
Jane raised a hand in order to interrupt Maura. As much as Maura's lecture satisfied Jane's curiosity, Jane didn't feel the need to know all the details about the city. Even more now that she knew the most essential part of it.
"What kind of pirates, exactly?"
The wind blew harder – suddenly – and caused Maura to pay attention to the spring tide anew. She crossed her arms against her chest and focused on the waves that came crashing loudly and violently against the walls of the city. She would never get tired of it.
"You will know everything about the pirates of Saint-Malo tomorrow. Since we're staying in the walled port city, you'll see postcards of pirates – and books about them – absolutely everywhere."
"Why can't we go now?"
As genuine as the question was, Maura burst out laughing. She then motioned the waves – high and powerful – by the window of the hotel.
"It's way too dangerous, Jane. The streets aren't cut but you'll see that some waves will come crashing against the buildings, way above the walls."
Jane didn't say anything back. She had to admit that Maura's explanation was more than fair. Besides, she could see it herself: the spring tide was impressive, almost scaring. They were staying at a four-star hotel but Jane couldn't help wondering whether the windows were strong enough to handle the wind as well as the tide.
They were facing a storm, a real one. She had the feeling to be stuck in a light house in the middle of the ocean.
"We came here because I wanted you to experience a spring tide in the walled city. I wanted you to walk through the narrow, cobblestoned streets. I wanted you to see the gray stone the buildings are made of... I wanted you to understand that France isn't just about Paris."
Maura's hand brushed Jane's lower back. Her lips planted a quiet kiss on Jane's shoulder before she passed her arm around Jane's waist in order to hold her tightly. Jane let her do.
Maura whispered into Jane's ear.
"Isn't it fascinating?"
Jane gave Maura a slow nod. They were first row to witness the violence of the elements, how the different shades of gray – the sky, the sea, the buildings – melted into each other before forming an odd entity in complete movement.
It was barely 4pm but the sky was just as dark as if it were midnight already. The flames of the fireplace of their suite got reflected in the window and contrasted with the gray light outside.
"It doesn't happen all the time, you know. What you're seeing now is an annual event, something unique. There is even a media coverage."
Maura leaned her chin on top of Jane's shoulder.
There was something almost mystical in the spring tides of Saint-Malo. Of course she could have chosen the Mont Saint-Michel instead but she preferred French Brittany to Normandy any day. Besides, the Mont was packed all year long while Saint-Malo was quieter in the fall in spite of it being a very touristic destination as well.
"But ahem... If it's dangerous to go outside, shouldn't we lock ourselves inside a bit better? I mean, the windows are exposed to the wind and to the waves."
Jane didn't want to sound scared but she felt a bit concerned nonetheless. They were really close to the top of the walls of the city. She could see the walk that people probably took every day when the tide wasn't so high on top of them.
And there was nobody there, nothing but the Channel which swell reminded her of a rather realistic Hollywood movie. A disaster movie.
"I wouldn't have taken you to Saint-Malo if it was risky. We'll do just fine if we stay inside... They are used to facing it. I made sure that we would have this suite, so you can enjoy the view like nobody else."
The pride that showed in Maura's voice caused her to blush. She couldn't help feeling proud though. And immensely happy. She was sharing a unique experience with Jane and it was exactly how she saw their vacations in France.
The moment had to be theirs, and it had to be unique.
"So we're in a pirates' city..."
"Oh god." Maura rolled her eyes. "The main point is the spring tide, Jane. Not the pirates. Besides, there aren't pirates in France anymore. This time is over."
"Who cares? They were here at some point. That's super cool."
Words had a strength that often took Maura aback. The feelings that they could stir up were intense, very intense. And it's exactly what happened as Jane spoke. Her remark caused a warmth to invade Maura. It passed underneath her skin and went deep in her bones. The bright smile that played on her lips barely echoed the power of her feelings.
"I'm glad you like it."
Maura knew that – in spite of focusing on pirates – Jane understood the importance of the moment and she lived it too. Jane simply didn't dare to say it openly. She wasn't good at expressing herself.
With the same quietness and the same gentleness as the ones that she had showed in the morning when Jane had woken up, Maura walked behind Jane. She settled in her back and passed both arms around Jane's waist. She was dying for the touch, for the heat of Jane's body against hers.
Jane didn't say a word. She didn't need to. Her thumb caressing the back of Maura's hand – just as she had done on the train – resulted enough for Maura to enjoy the comfort of their quiet embrace.
This is our moment. We both want it and we're both aware of it. I won't forget the other moments, Jane, but I want to remember this one as the first one that symbolizes the serenity I feel when I'm in your arms. There's a storm outside but the suite is quiet. We're inside, and at peace. We can face the force of the elements and we aren't scared of it. This is how I define us, how I see us.
I want to remain in the time being. From now on I'm going to put aside Boston and Quantico, all these little details that don't deserve a second here. Alea jacta est. We'll see.
I'm happy. I'm genuinely happy. I'm with you and you're being sweet to me. You know how I feel about you – more or less, even if I haven't said the exact words out loud yet – and I know that you don't see me just as a friend. I don't care about the rest. The rest can wait. I just want to enjoy the moment and feed myself of this smile that lights up your face. I've made you happy. You're happy to be here with me. Perhaps I shouldn't admit it but you have no idea how proud it makes me feel.
I've succeeded. Whenever I see this sparkle in your eyes, I know I've succeeded. And there's nothing more satisfying. You have no idea how alive I feel when it happens. Everything suddenly makes sense: I'm here for a reason and this reason is you. It's you, Jane. It's always been you. You.
"So... Besides these awesome pirates, what else are we supposed to see here? What's Saint-Malo famous for?"
Jane was teasing her. Maura knew it and the truth was that she really enjoyed it. It felt good to see that some things hadn't changed, that their bond was still the same. It was the proof for her that what she and Jane were living was meant to be. It comforted the idea she had had, her sweet fantasies.
"Oh, many things actually! The Solidor Tower, for instance. It's a 14th-century building that holds a collection tracing the history of voyages around Cape Horn and it's by the sea. The Privateer's House... It's a ship-owner's townhouse built in 1725 that shows objects from the history of privateering, weaponry and ship models..."
"Say no more, Maura: I need to visit this house. We can't leave without visiting this house." Jane turned around. She didn't break the embrace, she simply made sure that she would be able to pass her arms around Maura's waist the same way Maura was holding her instead. "But before..."
Maura frowned. A genuine and sweet confusion darkened her traits. She wrinkled her nose and tilted her head as she tried to understand Jane's imminent thoughts.
"I've told you that we cannot go outside now. It's way too dangerous."
Jane leaned over and only stopped when her lips brushed Maura's. Her desires were clear now, very clear.
"Good. Because it's not what I had in mind."
You're being bold now. Do you even realize what a turn-on it is? I love it. Please don't stop, Jane. Don't ever stop it. Be in command, be mischievous. Be alive. Be mine.