Author's Note: I'm doing Lana Del Rey a serious injustice here...

Day One-Hundred Forty-Eight: Break My Fall by Lana Del Rey

"Guys are full of such bullshit," Hanna muttered as she dabbed her eyes for the umpteenth time that night. Hanna had come over my apartment because she was too upset to be in her empty apartment. Her boyfriend had just left her.

I rubbed her back. I was pretty pissed at her boyfriend. He gave her the greatest line in the history of heartbreak: "It's not you; it's me." It was a lie.

If my boyfriend ever gave me that line…I'd be insulted, more than anything else. I wasn't dumb and I was a "big girl", so to speak. I'd dealt with heartbreak in my childhood. I could handle being dumped. I liked to think I had more self-respect than to buy into that bullshit.

"You're lucky you have such a good boyfriend," Hanna concluded. Her blue eyes were teary and an irritated red from rubbing the tears away with a tissue.

I didn't say anything, but took the tissue from her and dabbed her eyes gently. "You'll be better. You'll find a better guy someday, Han."

"I need to talk to you, Spencer," Toby said to me.

I wasn't dumb. I was able to tell that things weren't going well for us recently. I was very apprehensive about this conversation.

I sighed before sitting down on his couch. He came over and sat down. He was facing me.

His eyes got this startling, deep blue shade. They only got that way when he was weary or had something on his mind. It was making me nervous.

"Spencer…I really like you. I really, really do. I really wanted to make this work for the both of us, but…" he began.

"You're breaking up with me."

I didn't know how else to put it. I didn't want to say goodbye. I really did like him. He was a good boyfriend. I liked talking to him about everything.

"I want us to still be friends. It's not you, it's—"

"Don't say it," I interrupted. I couldn't hear it or I might lose it. He never did anything wrong. I might've thought that because in my mind, we were still in "the Honeymoon Phase." But really, I could've broken down due to that one stupid lie. "I'm not going to let you take the blame for this one," I explained, standing up.

"Spencer, I don't want to—"

"Stop it, Toby. Stop it if you care. Stop trying to make me feel guilty!" I exclaimed.

He looked shocked. "I'm not trying to make you feel guilty, Spencer!"

I shook my head. "You are. You're using that filthy lie. Don't play the martyr. Don't make other people feel bad for you. I suggest you stop if you want a chance at any sort of relationship with me. It's bad enough that all of this happened. I don't want to hear you saying it. Just tell me what I did wrong. Tell me what made you mad and what was your breaking point. Don't fucking pretend that I'm this perfect princess who can do no wrong and you're in the wrong. You're not. A relationship is two people. We both caused this. My heart is already broken from it. Don't make me feel like some helpless person now," I snapped.

"I just…I didn't…" He couldn't form the words he wanted to say.

"Nothing you say or do now can make me feel better," I muttered. I wasn't going to try and win him back. I just wanted to make it harder for him to run and play martyr.

I left that night. I cried. Not only was I heartbroken, but I was insulted.

Who was I to preach about self-respect? I was the one who would break down crying if he called and wanted me back. Of course, I'd go crawling back. That was the person I was.

Sarah: Yeah, she did kill Toby and Ali.

MilaMizz: Oh, well if you get rosin, I suggest scratching it up with a scissor or something because it gets onto the bow easier then. I think there's something poetic about the rain. After all, the sun always shines the same, but it's never the exact same shade of grey. Toby and Alison were totally screwed.

AL3110: Okay. And yes, exactly.

tobyequalshottness: I think the moral of that one-shot was...don't f*** with Spencer.

Was I really being that vague yesterday when it came to the murder? I thought it was fairly obvious. I mean, I said that she shot them and I even described the blood on Toby's hands after Spencer shot him in the stomach.

Whatever. This day was shite, too. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

The next one-shot will be I Got You by Leona Lewis. IDK how I feel about it at this juncture. -Kayson