DISCLAIMER: I only own Allyson. Everyone else belongs to someone else.
"He's lost a lot of blood and he went into cardiac arrest twice while on the table. We've gotten him back and finished the surgery. From a surgical standpoint, he looks good and if he makes it through the next 24 hours without a problem, he's got a good chance. He has a tube in his mouth to help him breathe and several tubes with medication to keep him stable," the doctor said.
"When can we see him," Ronnie asked.
"Only two right now and for only 10 minutes," the doctor said.
"You and Lesh go," Ronnie said.
Alesha looked at Allyson. "Are you ready," she asked.
"No, but how can you be ready for this," Allyson said.
The nurse opened the door to Matt's ICU room. There were tubes and beeping coming from every direction. Allyson nearly lost it when she saw the bandage on Matt's chest where they'd had to open it to repair the damage. His shoulder was bandaged. He had an IV line in his neck and another into the arm on his undamaged side. Blood and fluids were running into one. Another line stuck out from his chest with another tube running fluids into that. His hair was matted and he bore little resemblance to the vibrant cop Allyson had seen that morning. Alesha stood next to her, tears glistening her eyes before patting Allyson's shoulder and leaving the room.
Allyson leaned over and kissed him on the forehead. "You'll never remember me having said this, but I love you. Please, come back to us," Allyson said.
Allyson was hoping she'd be met with a flicker of his eyes, but Matt stayed stock still on the bed.
She sat down next to him and held his hand.
"You have a lot of people out there pulling for you, especially me. I'm going to wait right here until you can wake up so we can talk. I love you, Matt. I love you," Allyson said, her last words dissolving into tears.
The nurse entered the room and told her the time was up and she could come back in six hours. The doctors wanted to give Matt a chance to recover and wake up on his own.
Allyson gave his cheek a kiss and promised to be back.
Once outside, Allyson was met by Ronnie. James had also arrived and took Alesha out of the lobby and, Allyson assumed, home. Ronnie held Allyson.
"He looks so awful, Ronnie," she said.
"He'll perk up. He's going to make it and he'll be fine," Ronnie assured her.
He offered her a ride back to her flat. "I don't want to leave," she started to protest.
"You can't see him again for another six hours. Leave your number with the desk and they'll call if something happens before you can get back," Ronnie said.
Reluctantly, Allyson went to the desk and asked if she could be told if anything happened before she returned.
"What's your relationship to the patient," the nurse asked.
Before she could speak, Ronnie said, "She's his girlfriend. Will you let her know what's going on with him when she calls or if something happens."
"Of course. We'll notify you," the nurse said.
Ronnie nodded his thanks and guided Allyson toward the elevator.
"Why did you say that? It's not true," Allyson said.
"Ally-girl, you're close enough to be his girlfriend. Besides, Matt will be honored when he finds out," Ronnie said.
She rode back to her flat in silence. She trudged up the stairs, unable to believe what had happened. She'd returned to England after her father lost his battle with cancer and New York had lost its luster. Everywhere she went, she was reminded of all the fun she'd had with her dad. She remembered walking down the streets, eating at vendors and feeding the birds in the park, touring the zoo and riding the ferry because she loved the water.
She missed her father. He'd been the best father and spent as much time with her as he possible could. He loved her. When he died, seeing all the familiar sights they had enjoyed together, was too much for her. She had wanted to get back to the familiar and, after living in London for years, she had returned and started working at the CPS.
She went to the shower and stood under the hot spray for several minutes.
She started sobbing. She prayed Matt would survive the aftermath of the surgery and she'd get the chance to tell him how she felt.
She'd admitted to him while he was on that bed, unconscious, no one knowing what the outcome would be, that she loved him. And, as much as she wanted to deny that emotion, make herself believe it was in the heat of the moment, she did love him.
She stepped out of the shower, slipped on her pj's and fell asleep.
That began the vigil that Allyson, Ronnie and Alesha kept with Matt. For a week, they each took turns sitting by his bedside reading him the paper, watching the telly or just talking to him. Allyson was there more than all them combined and the exhaustion showed on her face whenever one of her friends came to relieve her. She went to work for a few hours, but was overcome by how life seemed to go on while he was making no process with his recovery. Jake and Henry told her to take a few weeks off. She knew they were trying to give her a chance to stay with Matt and deal with whatever the prognosis would be. She could have stayed at home, but she was adamant about staying near Matt. She wanted him to know she was there when he woke up.
Ten days after Matt's shooting, Allyson was sleeping in her bed after spending all night at the hospital. The doctor's were doing an assessment of Matt and wouldn't allow anyone in to see the patient while they were examining him. Allyson had wanted to be there, knowing that they were going to take the tube out of his throat that morning. The doctor had said he didn't want Allyson to be disappointed if their examination showed no improvement. She understood, but wanted nothing more than to see those eyes of his.
She fell asleep, purely from exhaustion and was startled when her phone rang. At first she thought she was dreaming, until she saw the display on the phone: King's.
"Hello," she said, her voice shaky.
"Ms. Briscoe, this is Sister Kate. Wanted to let you know Mr. Devlin has awakened a bit. His voice is a bit weak, but he asked for 'Lyssa'. Do you know who that might be," she asked.
"That's me. Tell him I'll be there in a few minutes," Allyson said, hanging up the phone.
She called a taxi, changed quickly and rushed down the stairs when she heard the honking of the taxi.
When she got out and walked into King's, she was hoping she'd see those wonderful blue eyes of Matt.
She got her visitor's pass and headed up to the ICU unit. She wasn't surprised to see Ronnie sitting on the bench just outside Matt's room.
"He's awake," he said.
"I know. The nurse called me. She said he was asking for me," Allyson said.
Ronnie smiled. "Well then, go on."
Allyson hugged the older cop and entered the room. She sat down next to him and took his hand. As her fingers interlaced his, Matt's eyes opened.
Allyson knew he was glad she was there. He squeezed her hand with the smallest of squeezes.
"Lys," he whispered.
"Sshh. I'm right here," she said.
He closed his eyes, never letting go of her hand. Allyson put her cheek against his hand, closed her eyes and cried. But this time, she was crying because she was happy, not because she was scared to death he would leave without knowing how she felt about him.
The next several weeks involved some intense therapy for Matt. He had to regain his strength if he ever hoped to go back to the force. Three weeks after his initial hospitalization, the doctors said he could go home. Unfortunately, he didn't have a flat. No one knew when or even if Matt would come out of the hospital, so his sister had arranged for the landlord to re-rent the premises. She had placed all his belongings in a storage locker. It had made sense at the time, but now, that was a problem. All his stuff was in storage and, first Alesha, then Allyson, took his cat.
"Where am I going to stay Katie? I can't stay with you and your family, it's too far from the hospital," Matt was saying to his sister when Allyson entered the therapy room.
He had been frustrated and didn't know what to do.
Allyson heard the argument between brother and sister. "Matt, you can't go home to a flat with no one to watch you. If you come to my place, I can probably get your therapy done at the little clinic near the house," Katie said.
"That's not going to work, Katie," Matt said.
"You have to stay somewhere. Ronnie's place doesn't have a lift and it would hardly be proper for you to stay with Alesha," Katie said.
Allyson heard the discussion and she finally spoke up. "He's coming to stay with me," she said.
Matt and Katie looked at her in shock. "What," he asked.
"You can stay with me. I have a private lift and plenty of room. And it's close to the hospital. I'll be there if you need anything. Plus, there's always someone around if you need something," she said.
Matt looked at Allyson. He liked the idea of staying with her, but, seeing as how he didn't know what kind of relationship they had, was worried what might happen.
"You don't have to do that, Allyson. I'm sure we can find a nice convalescent home for him to recuperate," Katie said.
Seeing the horror on Matt's face, Allyson became more forceful. "What's the point in wasting money on a place he's going to hate. Look his insurance will provide a nurse if he needs one. When I'm at work, a nurse can take care of whatever he needs until he's on his feet. Besides, he can't very well look for a flat when he's in some place like that. Once he gets better he's out the door. At least at my place, he can stay until he finds a place," she said.
"You have a place big enough for Matt and his wheelchair? You have enough room to allow him to stay with you without stepping on each other," Katie asked.
"My place is plenty big enough, Katie. It's four bedrooms and two of them have private baths. There are hardwood floors in the entire place. I have a maid that comes in Mondays and Fridays. I have excellent security. I've been told I'm a good cook. Matt should be quite comfortable," Allyson said.
Deciding to give it a go, Matt agreed to Allyson's plan. Katie looked at Allyson and wondered how in the world Allyson could afford such a place.
Three days later, Allyson picked Matt up from the hospital and drove him to her flat. She parked near the lift, took the wheelchair out of the car and helped Matt ease into it. Normally, Matt would be protesting this show of 'weakness' but he didn't feel like he'd be able to walk the few feet to Allyson's lift and front door.
She pushed the chair and after boarding the lift, they were at her door.
Allyson unlocked it. She pushed him into the room.
"With these floors, it will be easy for you to get around. You can probably walk all around the flat, but I want you to have the chair if you need it. I put you in the room across from mine since it also has its own bathroom," she said.
She helped him into the room. She helped him on the bed and pointed out everything to him. "There's the phone. It's also an intercom so if you need something, just push it and ask. Gram needed some help from her aides when she got near the end. Everything is in the bathroom for you. I took the suitcases of clothes from the storage area and put them in the drawers. You're furniture and things are downstairs in the sub basement in my storage locker. Seems silly to pay for something I get for free. If there's something you want, I can get Paul to pull it out for you and bring it upstairs," she said.
Matt looked around the room, still shocked at the sheer size and beauty of the place.
"I'm going to order take away. What are you in the mood for," she asked.
"Italian," Matt said.
"Then I'll order your favorite. Why don't you rest? The remote is on the nightstand. I'll bring you some orange juice and your pain meds. I'll get you when the food arrives," she said.
She went out of the room and returned a short time later with the orange juice and the pill bottle. Matt sat back on the bed and took the pills. She sat the bottle and glass on the nightstand.
"Get some rest, Matt," she said.
She helped take off his shoes and he slipped under the covers. The bed was very comfortable and the entire room smelled like Allyson, violets and lavender.
She smiled and slipped out of the room, leaving the door opened a crack.
Matt spent the next six weeks in Allyson's home. They ate dinner together. Talked about everything and enjoyed each others company. During that time, neither had brought up the quick kiss he'd given her all those weeks ago. It was the promise of that kiss that had kept Matt hoping Allyson felt the same way.
Allyson had been hoping for a relationship with Matt, but the fact that they hadn't discussed anything, made Allyson believe he wanted them to be friends.
They were eating Chinese Matt had purchased for dinner when he brought it up.
"Remember that kiss," he asked.
"Yeah," she said.
"I was thinking about that and I think we need to talk," he said.
"I know what you're going to say and you're right," she said.
"You do? I am? About what," he asked.
"Yeah. You only just recently got out of the relationship with Alesha and you being shot was pretty emotional. I totally understand the need for us to stay friends. It's preferable, really," she said, quickly emptying her food into the trash bin.
Matt stared at her back. He was greatly disappointed that she had said that because he was thinking just the opposite. However, Matt knew better than to force the issue.
"Well," he started to say while clearing his throat, "I'm glad we've got that out of the way.
"I still want you to stay here. It's nice having you around," she said.
"Really," he said.
"Yeah. I've always wanted a roommate," she said.
That's how they became roommates, but Matt desperately wanted more. And, unbeknownst to him, Allyson wanted the same thing.
They had fallen into a comfortable pattern that brought them steps closer to admitting their feelings for one another, but something always pulled them back. Matt was beginning to wonder if had all been in his imagination.
Then Allyson had been attacked.